Restored Church of God: We are Bigger, Badder, Meaner and Prettier Than Wikipedia
Dale Schurter has finally reemerged from Dave Pack's reeducation camp where he has learned to think in accordance with Dave's will. Eyes were anointed, again. New ways of seeing things are now implemented.
Dale writes:
This extended visit has enabled us to again witness, and begin to participate in “hands on,” the dynamic work God is accomplishing here and around the world.
Brother Dale wants you to wake up and open your eyes to the fact that earthquakes have been happening around the world. That is a sure indication that the end is here! Never mind the fact that earthquakes have always happened, it's just that with the internet news travels instantaneously instead of being delayed for weeks.
Be very frightened!
Brother Dale writes:We can now vividly see the fulfillment of prophecy marching on, with the massive earthquakes of yesterday affecting nations on the shores of the entire Indian Ocean: “BANDA ACEH, Indonesia – Two massive earthquakes [measuring 8.6 and 8.2 on the Richter scale] triggered back-to-back tsunami warnings for Indonesia on Wednesday, sending panicked residents fleeing to high ground in cars and on the backs of motorcycles” (Associated Press).
Then again today, more earthquakes in places such as Mexico and the Oregon coast. This should bring to mind Jesus Christ’s words for our time: “…and there shall be famines, and pestilences, and earthquakes, in diverse (different) places” (Matt. 24:7).
Friends and brethren, it is high time we fully open our eyes, hearts and minds to the reality we ARE living in the last days. And, not only that, but especially that we are living at the very end of the entire Church age! Do we individually really GRASP this truth?
Today’s apostle, Mr. David Pack, and The Restored Church of God continue to cry out very loudly over the airwaves, cyberspace, in print and in person: May God speed the day of the establishment of His Kingdom on earth.
It's high time you opened your eyes! Dave speaks with AUTHORITY! Or is it that Apostle Dave is crying out so much that he needs to start using Beano?
Then Brother Dale gets to the gist of the matter. Either you follow Dave or damn yourself:
As with all things regarding Dave and crew, we are being constantly reminded that the Restored Church of God is the most incredible, largest, mightiest, biggest, and prettiest COG ever to grace this planet. The earth trembles at the mightiness of Dave Pack and the RCG. Even those pagans at Wikipedia are being brought to their knees in humility at the awesomeness of DaveWe each, individually, choose either to participate in this Work, or reject it!
Finally, I leave you with some stunning statistics from RCG main website (rcg.org). The True Origin of Easter booklet was downloaded an incredible 83,417 times during the week leading up to Easter, and was downloaded 35,316 times on Sunday alone! Certain search phrases put RCG’s booklet ahead of even Internet giant Wikipedia. For example, when someone types in “origin of Easter” in Google, the booklet has been in the number 1 search-results position!
Adding to the week’s amazing success is that free (organic) traffic increased substantially over 2011. Nearly 80 percent of visitors to our website during the week came at NO COST to God’s Work, in large part made possible by our extremely high Google search rankings.
6 comments:
That earthquake thing has run it's course as proof of anything. Since the advent of plate tectonics and our understanding of the pacific ring of fire etc, it is laughable to think VolcanoeYHVH , EarthquakeYHVH or TsunamiYHVH was playing such games. It's geology not theology.
M.T.Harbors
Dunno. Still have not run in to anyone on the street or in the media who ever even heard of 'ol Elephant Ears and his pseudo gospel.
The word "delusional" certainly comes to mind!
BB
Schurter is stuck in HWA land.
"Friends and brethren, it is high time we fully open our eyes, hearts and minds to the reality we ARE living in the last days. And, not only that, but especially that we are living at the very end of the entire Church age! Do we individually really GRASP this truth?"
No, of course we don't. We don't grasp anything, apparently, because these guys have been parroting the same old hackneyed HWA catch phrases for decades now. And it's a good thing they do, too, because we're all too stupid to really GET IT. So they keep repeating the same things, over and over and over again.
Or maybe the problem is that the message doesn't resonate, or they're just terrible at their jobs. Or both.
Bragging rights of predators?
The parasites are at again, multiplying at an alarming rate.
Or is that dividing?
Jesus Christ is our Apostle and High Priest! Who needs David Pack, Gerald Flurry, Ron Weinland....
Dale Schurter said, "Friends and brethren, it is high time we fully open our eyes, hearts and minds to the reality we ARE living in the last days".
MY COMMENT - I thought Mr. Armstrong made it very clear - so crystal clear that even a moron could understand - that the early 1970s were the very last days.
When Armstrongite ministers banter about "the very last days", it usually means they are about to hit you up for more money.
Brethren, I must spare not, cry aloud and lift up my voice like a Flurry Trumpet: Dave Packatolla wants ALL your money. QUICK - hide your wallets and purses!
You have received this last days end time warning!
Richard
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