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Monday, March 25, 2013
Brethren, We Are Now Entering The Season of No Doughnuts
Today's your last chance to have a bacon maple doughnut before the Days of Unleavend Bread set in.
Did you remember to get all the crumbs out of your toaster or did you just throw it in the trash so you can buy another one next week?
Did you check your suit pockets to make sure there is no stray cookie or bread crumb are in there? That is the favorite excuse ministers come up with every year. What about your pants cuffs?
Did you deleaven your car? Every last crumb?
Did you move the refrigerator out and clean behind and under it?
Did you go through every single item in our kitchen cupboard checking for some type of leavening agent?
Did you do the same in your bathroom?
Did you throw out the cat and dog food because it have leavening in it?
What about the Brewers Yeast?
What about the baking soda used for your swimming pool alkalinity?
Did you stock up on "Everything" matzo's and plenty of butter? Are you planing on eating a piece every day?
Are you sending your kids to school with turkey matzo sandwiches, or matzo and peanut butter?
Many COGers are very diligent about doing all of these things, yet they are still the same mean nasty people they were before Passover as they lord themselves over the brethren. They dish out weird and absurd biblical interpretations that are totally irrelevant. They damn people for not following their magnificent words of wisdom.
This is one season in Armstrongism that I do not miss at all.