Saturday, May 4, 2013

Dave Pack: I Have Taught Prophecy More Extensively and Correctly Than ANY Other COG Pastor Ever Has

God's most perfect humble creation is back boasting about his magnificence.  Can there be any man on this earth that is as brilliant and magnificent as Dave Pack?  Can perfection be this glorious and tall?

I have taught prophecy ­extensively—­and ­correctly!—the truth of established understanding—­for over 40 years, probably much, much more than ANY other pastor during this same period. I wanted people to know what lies ahead. So I taught very thorough ­class-­like workshops in every one of my Worldwide Church of God pastorates, covering all the basics and more, verse-by-verse through Daniel and Revelation, with a great many passages included from other ­books. (Here is but a partial list of what I have covered in sermons.)


DennisCDiehl said...

There is nothing quite so endearing as a humble Jesus like person. Stomach alert!

If Dave has been correctly doing prophecy over 40 years, it would indicate he wasn't correct at all. Or let's say he is as correct as Rod Meredith is correct.

Those who follow Mr. Nar C Cistic pretty much now deserve what they get as time passes. They are truly brain dead and incapable of personal or critical thinking.


"If I was that accurate in the past , how much more accurate can I be now!" Ummmmm....none.

DennisCDiehl said...

One can be meticulous and thorough and class like in sorting and bagging cow pies from sheep droppings and bear poop from rabbit pellets.

The author of Revelation fed off the Book of Daniel. (Midrash). Daniel was written by Jews to encourage their fellow Jews in the rebellion against the Romans under the Maccabees in 160's BC. The author of Revelation copied that form as a Jewish Christian encouraging the Jewish Christians to hang in there for 3.5 until the Romans were routed from Jerusalem. Problem is it only took the Romans 8 months to lay seige to Jerusalem and crush them.

When you compare Daniel and Revelation all one is doing is seeing how the author of Revelation went back to Daniel and picked the parts he wanted to tell his story in the present.

The reason Daniel is so accurate in Daniel 11 and vague in 12 is because all in Daniel in 11 had already happened by the writing in 160's BC and in 12 the future was yet unclear. But I spare you Dave, you'd not understand.

Anonymous said...

Dave Pack: "I Have Taught Prophecy More Extensively and Correctly Than ANY Other COG Pastor Ever Has "


"I have taught my theologically and Biblically uneducated misundersood, mistaken and misguided view of prophecy and as I see it more than any other equally mistaken COG paster ever has.'


Assistant Deacon said...

I, I, I.

Me, Me, Me.

Ha, Ha, Ha.

Anonymous said...

Just as Dave had to use a four hour wear down to the run up of "And yes, I am an Apostle," so Dave will spend the next month wearing people's minds down to accept whatever he wants to conclude with.

Then they will fall into the poop pile and not recognize the odor

Anonymous said...

Seapack wrote, "It is not the immediate purpose here to identify Joshua. That will come later."

Six-Pack has already identified himself as being the lawful end-time Joshua, so would that make Seapack the unlawful Joshua - or does that remain Joe Sr's title forever and always?

With all these split personalities matching wits against each other, it's no wonder COG prophecy is so damn confusing!

Anonymous said...

I still think Dale Schurter must have died. He is missing in action or at least muzzled.

Douglas Becker said...

My predictions (based on science) have proved to be more correct and reliable than Davey Pack's (in fact, any and all of the Cult of Armstrong).

I am not a prophet.

I do not claim to be a prophet.

So if Davey is so all fired accurate as a prophet, why can't he be as accurate as me?

Oh, right.

He doesn't know science -- if he did, he would know that DNA torpedoes his prophecies based on British Israelism.

Oh, well, it's just another psychopath burning ashes (anything he is able to actually use is stolen from someone else's forest).

Entropy wins.


Joe Moeller said...

Dale Schurter has not died.

However, he is very busy growing Marijuana in his back yard and basement using "Natural Growing Techniques" without fertilizers or pesticides.

He needs the weed to be able to endure Dave Pack and still be able to draw a paycheck, now that he has painted himself into a corner and has nowhere else to go.

It will be very hard for Dale on the 7th year, as he will not be able to grow his crop. How he will cope will be VERY DIFFICULT INDEED!

Joe Moeller
Cody, WY

Douglas Becker said...

Joe, you know the blessings of tithing: Dale receive double his crop in the sixth year!

You know though, he has to take 10% of it to the Feast for all to enjoy. No doubt he will share it with the fatherless and widow. If it's real quality (as we would be led to believe), the fatherless and widows won't much care about their status -- at least during the Feast.

Can second tithe be used to get your own personal bong for Feast usage only?

The implications of using Armstrongism principles become more and more deliriously insane with each swipe....

Byker Bob said...

One summer day back in the '60s, I was washing my old Impala convertible, when suddenly, a raggedly dressed black man came dancing down the street. He had a funny hat on, I believe with a cross pin (iirc), and was carrying a box with crude letters that read "Tithes and Offerings."

At the time, I was involved with a cult which taught that it was God's only true church, so was probably unfairly dismissive towards this gentleman. Now, upon careful reflection, and wisdom from additional years of life on Planet Earth, I realize that this gentleman probably had greater authenticity and credibility than any of the supposed spiritual guides associated with the Armstrong movement. He probably would actually have accomplished some of God's work if I had dug into the pocket of my Levis and given him my beer money! Can't say the same for the bogii!


Corky said...

See, the good thing about "prophecy" is, you get to use the same prophecy over and over again. It's so handy and convenient that way.

We can take a prophecy that refers to Jerusalem and apply it to Rome and when that plays out we can apply that same "prophecy" and apply it to America. It's so simple, so easy - it's "dual", don't ya know...

And, to be 100% wrong 100% of the time is no problem either becuz it's in the Bible so we know it's eventually going to happen, some day, because (and "everybody" know this) the Bible is the "word of God" and infallible...

So, you see, prophecy is the safest and most useful thing the conman has to use in his arsenal of deceptions. That and saying that everything in the rest of Christendom is paganism in disguise (which it is) you have a fool proof religion that you can use to sheer your sheep with for years and years.

Anonymous said...

Nice illustration. Isn't that the gay doll from the Ken and Barbie set?

Goldengloves said...

The Ken doll and Dave Pack are the two most perfect men on earth today. Beautifully coiffed hair, impeccable dressers, cocky looks. The perfect metrosexual or something else if your gaydar is working.

Anonymous said...

"But God does work through His chosen servants. In fact, He never reveals His Plan through anyone else. Therefore, finding the one He leads becomes crucial."

Anonymous said...

ummm, is perfect understanding of God's plan a requirement for salvation?, I didn't think so.

we have direct access to the Father now, by the authority of Jesus.

there is no need to find any man.

Anonymous said...

David C. MyPackage is getting cocky.

Anonymous said...

It's interesting how so many claim to have "direct access to God", yet are in a host of different religions.

And the ass-holiest of them seem to claim they're in "God's nation"