Saturday, June 22, 2013

Bob Thiel: Birthdays Are Satan's Third Most Important Worship Day

Bob Thiel still is struggling to find everything in life one pagan festival after another.  Thiel is hyperventilating over the connection he sees with birthdays  and Anton Lavey's Satanic Bible.  Because Lavey mentions birthdays Thiel assumes that the rest of humanity is sitting there worshiping Satan as they light the birthday candles.

Back in 1969 Anton Lavey wrote The Satanic Bible. On page 96 (in the 1976 version) it mentions birthdays:
THE highest of all holidays in the Satanic religion is the date of one’s own birth. This is in direct contradiction to the holy of holy days of other religions, which deify a particular god who has been created in an anthropomorphic form of their own image, thereby showing that the ego is not really buried.

The Satanist feels: “Why not really be honest and if you are going to create a god in your image, why not create that god as yourself.” Every man is a god if he chooses to recognize himself as one. So, the Satanist celebrates his own birthday as the most important holiday of the year. After all, aren’t you happier about the fact that you were born than you are about the birth of someone you have never even met? Or for that matter, aside from religious holidays, why pay higher tribute to the birthday of a president or to a date in history than we do to the day we were brought into this greatest of all worlds?
After one’s own birthday, the two major Satanic holidays are Walpurgisnacht and Halloween (or All Hallows’ Eve). (Lavey A, Gilmore P. The Satanic Bible. Avon, September 1, 1976, p. 96–note it is on page 53 of an online version I found also).

Bob then has to drag his perception of what he thinks the Bible says about it:

The Bible never encourages the celebration of birthdays. Instead, it tends to speak in a negative manner concerning them (cf. Matthew 14:6-11; Jeremiah 20:14-18).
Of course, early Christians did not celebrate birthdays nor did the early Jews. Nor have real Christians ever celebrated Halloween. As far as the Jews, notice what the first century Jewish historian Josephus noted that Jewish families did not celebrate birthdays:
Nay, indeed, the law does not permit us to make festivals at the birth of our children, and thereby afford occasion of drinking to excess (Josephus. Translated by W. Whiston. Against Apion, Book II, Chapter 26. Extracted from Josephus Complete Works, Kregel Publications, Grand Rapids (MI), 14th printing, 1977, p. 632).
Then Bob has to admit that there is NO prohibition in the Bible against birthdays.  In spite of that, he dances around and says that birthdays should not be observed.  Just because he can find no reference to an early Christian observing one, does not mean that they didn't.  There are a lot of things the Bible does not record about the early Christians.  Just because it is not there does not mean they never did it.  The Bible is NOT a history book, when will Bob ever realize that?


Anonymous said...


Birthdays are a time of joyous celebration. It is a time when family and friends honor a milestone in the life of an individual that is greatly loved. There is NOTHING unbiblical about showing love and happiness toward a loved one. There is NOTHING unbiblical about seeing the look of surprise when a loved one is honored with a gift. There is NOTHING unbiblical about dinner with family and friends and the slicing of a special dessert. This isn't about worship. This is honor. This is expressing love.

All the COG's seem to have done is take perfectly happy celebrations of the joy of the milestones of life and do everything they can to look in the past and party-poop it for completely invalid and ridiculous reasons. There is no satan worship, astrological observance, or whatever you want to call it when families get together to celebrate a loved one. That thought doesn't enter ANY normal person's lives.

Notice I said NORMAL PERSON'S lives.

As for me, I love birthday celebrations. It gives the opportunity to get together with family, honor a special person, maybe surprise them with something really nice, and make it a memorable, special, happy day. NO, there's no astrology. NO, there's no satanism. NO, there's no weird things going on.

Just love toward another and making them feel and know they are cared for and special. Shame on people like this who can't believe simply honoring a special day in the life of a loved one can be innocent.

And OH - church anniversaries (birthdays) are somehow OK?????

RSK said...

I always felt the COG was in error on this one - they said alcohol was OK as long as it did not result in drunkenness and revelings (which "the bible specifically forbids") - I saw no reason to not see birthdays in same light.

But I was a minor at the time and obviously my opinion carried no weight.

A more cynical viewpoint might be that they took this specific stance in order to ensure "offering" money wasn't diluted elsewhere.

Byker Bob said...

I never thought I'd see the day when an Armstrongist quoted a Satanist to support a doctrinal approach! I mean, isn't Satan known for coopting the things of God and counterfeiting them? Anton LaVey is just the Satanic opposite of Armstrongite ministers. One falsely claims to speak for God, and the other falsely claims to speak for Satan. At the end of the day, both are liars, which means they are both reporting to the same boss.

Satanism has one commandment: "Doest as thou wilt". It's the serpent's message from the garden of Eden. There is no Biblical commandment to keep birthdays, and there is no biblical commandment not to keep birthdays. Guess what happens when you hand discernment over to a Pharisee?


Anonymous said...

"Back in 1969 Anton Lavey wrote The Satanic Bible. On page 96 (in the 1976 version) it mentions birthdays: THE highest of all holidays in the Satanic religion is the date of one’s own birth."

Well, what did you expect some ignorant fool to say in his satanic book?

The highest of all holidays in the satanic religion appears to be the date of the birth of the pagan god (December 25) in the winter.

Another satanic holiday is something the pagans call Easter in the spring.

Halloween is comparatively minor nonsense and evil in the fall.

Weekly, many of Satan's religions observe the day of their Sun god, called Sunday by pagans.

Joe Moeller said...

Its coming...

I can feel it in my bones...

Thiel is soon to go after the "Tooth Fairy" and calling her evil and Satanic!

Im firing the first pre-emptive shot before he does!

The tooth fairy as we now know her didn't make an appearance until the early 1900s, as a generalized "good fairy" with a professional specialization.

The child loses a baby tooth, which is put under the pillow at night, and the tooth fairy exchanges it for a present, usually money but sometimes candy. Exchanges of this sort are common in many rites of passage (like an exchange of rings at a wedding, say).

The tooth fairy grew slowly in popularity over the next few decades. The Tooth Fairy, a three-act playlet for children by Esther Watkins Arnold, was published in 1927.

Lee Rogow's story "The Tooth Fairy" appeared in 1949 and seems to be the first children's story written about the tooth fairy. She became widely popular from the 1950s onward, with a veritable eruption of children's books, cartoons, jokes, etc., including more focus on children's dental hygiene.

Parents cheerfully bought into the idea and the tooth fairy became part of family life. The 1980s saw the commercialization and merchandising of the tooth fairy, with special pillows, dolls, banks, etc.

So she is NOT an ancient pagan goddess, or has any pagan origins!


Luv, ;-)
Joe Moeller
Cody, WY

Anonymous said...

The reasoning of the WCG under HWA was that the only time the Bible specifically and clearly mentioned birthdays it was only unbelievers like Pharaoh and Herod who observed them, and partied, and tragic things seemed to happen.

In the OT, on Pharaoh's birthday he hanged his chief baker (Genesis 40:20-22).

In the NT, on Herod's birthday he had John the Baptist beheaded (Matthew 14:6-12).

There was also some speculation that Job's children might have been observing his oldest son's birthday when a mighty wind knocked down his son's house and killed all of Job's seven sons and three daughters (Job 1:18-19).

On the other hand, the complaint of one WCG guy who was married with kids was that HWA did not want mothers to observe their children's birthdays, while at the same time HWA's own son GTA got to screw their daughters at AC. It seemed like a case of HWA and GTA fussing about some relatively minor, questionable thing while they ignored the bigger, clearer laws of God.

Anonymous said...

Levay was just tapping into pop culture at an opportune time.

Why Thiel would give him any special recognition is beyond me. Surely he knows Levay doesn't have a hotline to Satan or have any other special insight.

Anonymous said...

Dr T seems to be stuck in childhood mode. Since he has "burst" on the scene as the one true church and prophet, he has not come up with one topic that is worthy of a 12 year olds attention. He'd be better of as the Spokesman's Club And Table Topics Church of God. SCATT-COG. (Sorry, that's just how the letters worked out:)

Dr T has the depth of a lilly pad and speaks with the authority of a pansy.

No thinking adult would be drawn to his views and no theologically adept person would be interested in his Sunday School approach to just about everything. I expect he'd do well with a flannel graph for his video presentations. He could even mimick different voices as he moved the paper figures around the scene for extra thrills and drama...

I hardly think LCG would be shaking in it's boots over Dr Thiel. While Dave Pack is delusional in a clever and intelligent sort of way, which is a really bad combo, Dr Thiel is delusional in a silly kind of way and is harmless. He also is terribly ineffective


Allen C. Dexter said...

This stupid doctrine and the spurious reasoning came straight from the JWs. I once saw an article in their Watchtower magazine that was almost word for word the article Ken Hermann plagiarized for the the PT. We reprinted it and sent it out to people who had questions on the subject. Much ado about absolute nonsense.

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure Herb didn't like the idea of anyone in his cult considering any day worthy of celebration that didn't intrinsically revolve listening to propaganda from and sending money to Herb.

Anonymous said...

If birthdays are wrong because at two birthdays someone got killed, then why not ban large gatherings at banquets and drinking in a large group? Are we to avoid celebrating the birthday of a magazine (remember the 50th anniversary edition of the PT?); birthday of a marriage (wedding anniversary) birthday of a nation (4 July)?

John said...

Anon 7:56
Re those references used by HWA/WCG re birthdays (eg Pharaoh, Job, Herod, etc) it was all used to support his fallacy that because bad things happened on a person's birthday that ergo birthdays shouldn't be observed. Well that's like saying that because a bad thing happened on Passover with JC being murdered ergo we shouldn't observe Passover! And what about pharaoh's butler who was reinstated on pharaoh's birthday?! Wouldn't that have been a good omen to him to observe birthdays? It's just another demonstration of HWA's illogical mindset...

Assistant Deacon said...

You don't need to cite a single scripture to know Herbert Armstrong's view of birthday celebrations was warped and hurtful. People throughout the COGs celebrate birthdays today without a second thought, defying the teachings of the founder they claim to extol. It's all a mass of confusion and hypocrisy. But hey, they feel better about themselves for supposedly "upholding the truth," and to them that's all that matters.

Anonymous said...

well you know....satanists eat hamburgers, so I guess we in the COG should avoid hamburgers at all costs.

Anonymous said...

Nothing ever seems to be too much of a stretch. One kid I grew up with in WCG had parents who wouldn't let him attend neighborhood carnivals because they insisted it was derived from the world "carnal". If it was called a fair or a festival it was apparently ok. Good grief.

Head Usher said...

It is derived from the same root word, "carne" meaning flesh. However, the word "carnal" is another branch not directly related.

Most scholars accept that "carnival" is derived from the medieval Italian "carnelevare" meaning literally, "the removal of meat," but colloquially, "farewell to meat," referring to the upcoming abstinence from eating meat during Lent. In the gulf states it's known as Mardi Gras (Fat Tuesday), the day before Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) but elsewhere it is still called "Carnaval" or "Carnivale." It is a time celebrated traditionally because it was the beginning of the leadup to Easter, but also your last chance to indulge in rich fatty foods for 40 days. In many traditionally Catholic countries, especially Brasil, Carnaval is still celebrated with pageantry. The use of the word to describe itinerant amusement parks dates from 1931.

Armstrongites can be so stupid, and their ways of believing in god and ignorantly trying to honor him can be so superstitious.