Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Needed: Creative App For COG Laodicean Alerts

This has been making the rounds of various COG blogs and Facebook pages.  I think some creative person with an Armstrongite background needs to come up with a COG Alert.  
That would save a lot of problems when you are ordering extra bacon on your pizza,
 or smoking a cigar at the local cigar lounge.

This would work great in Branson this year to alert you when heretic COG members from the other 6 splinter groups are entering the same restaurant as you.  This would prevent you sharing bowling lanes with unconverted heathens from other COG's


Anonymous said...

You'd think aspiring Christians would practice Gal. 6:1. But, alas. Apparently, some plan to take that selfish, easy, low road recommended by their prophet or apostle. They'll go to their local ACOG store prior to the feast to get some of that good old Laodecean repellent, and never even consider what scripture actually teaches.

Byker Bob said...

Attention ACOG shoppers! Only three more days to get your asses (and oxes, manservants and maidservants!) to RCG! Dave has prepared the most fantastic infrastructure in all of history just for you, and is anxiously awaiting your phone calls, emails, and road trips to his headquarters! It's time to make like Noah's animals and take your wad of money to the "ark" in Wadsworth! You may not get your wad's worth, but remember, Haggai is a book!


Anonymous said...

That's a very funny video!
I especially liked the card game the boys played-

Boy #1: "I'll trade you two [name unclear]'s for an Ellen White."
Boy #2: "He didn't have prophetic vision!"

Something similar could happen with a 'True Church Card Game' at this year's Branson Feast-

Member #1: "I'll trade you two Jesuses for one HWA."

Member #2: "NO WAY! Jesus only had to endure torturous death, but Apostle HWA had to endure that Jezebel Ramona!"

Member #1: "Sorry, good point. How about I trade you two Denis Rohans for one Terry Ratzmann?"

Member #2: "Deal! OK, I'll trade you three Stan Rader baptismal bathtubs for one Emperor Hirohito."

Member #1: "Only if you throw in a Steuben Crystal card!"

Member #2: "I don't have any Steuben Crystal cards. How about I trade you for a HWA Never Violated Dorothy card?"

Member #1: "Heck, yeah! That's worth all my cards combined. Sucker!"

Anonymous said...

I'm a Church of God member and I thought this video was so funny!