Friday, March 27, 2015

How Rod Meredith Betrayed Married Couples By Asking Them To Reveal Intimate Aspects Of Their Marriages And Then Forcing Them To Divorce

For many years when Roderick C Meredith was over the Church Administration Department he was the main agent of enforcing Herbert Armstrong's perverse Divorce and Remarriage "doctrine."  I remember in my church area watching families and good marriages being ripped apart by this disgusting and vile teaching.

In July 1969 Rod Meredith wrote a letter to the ministry giving them instructions on what he expected them to do.

One of the first things he wanted the ministers to do was to gain the married couples trust and to have them spill the beans on every aspect of their married lives, particularly when it came to sex.  The perverse preoccupation that Rod Meredith has for sex is just mind boggling.  It ran his mind back then and still does to this very day.

Here are some excerpts from the letter that is on the Living Armstrongism blog:

World Headquarters
Pasadena, California
Herbert W. Armstrong
President and Pastor
Office of
Roderick C. Meredith Second Vice-President

July 18, 1969

Special instructions: SAVE!

Dear Fellow Ministers:

This is a special letter of instruction regarding the handling of divorce and marriage cases. I hope all of you will read it very carefully and follow these instructions in handling these cases/

Appeal to them to be open-minded and candid about any pertinent information or intimate details of their past marriages. Let them know that you have gone into intimate details of dozens of cases and that you are not going to to be shocked at all. They should not hold back anything about any pertinent romantic or sex relationships before marriage. Tell them--if these factors apply--that you are God's minister and are married, have children and know about sex. Also, that you are bound as God's minister not to divulge any of it to anyone, and that, in fact, you forget most details anyway as you go through more and more cases.

Notice how Meredith demanded that members share every intimate detail of their sex lives,, both before an during their marriages.  The claim that Meredith makes that minsters do not share this information is a total lie.  That is the ideal that they should have had and that many ministers in Christian domination's actually practice, but it was NEVER practiced in the Radio/Worldwide Church of God.  The ministry wrote down all the juicy details and sent them off to Pasadena where they were read by numerous people.  Ministers regularly talked about the sex lives of their members with other ministers and LAUGHED about them.

I will never forget the time when Church Administration was located in the Hall of Administration lobby on the first floor down the hallway from the Security Department.  Will in the Security Department one day talking to the receptionist we could hear Robin Webber and another man laughing about a counseling that he had just had.  We could hear the intimate details of the conversation that should have been private.  He would talk and then they would laugh, share more details and more laughter.  Not only could we hear it all, but the office clerical staff and other people in CAD could hear it too.

One of the functions of the huge main frame computer system the church had in Pasadena was the ability to keep member files on every single member.  Every letter a person write in, how much tithe money there were paying, how many offerings they made, every question asked, every counseling they had and every comment a  deacon, elder or minister ever made was stored in these files.  There was no privacy then and certainly still is not today.

Meredith made full used of this stored information and it was used over and over to break families and marriages up.

Meredith had a large list of questions that he expected these members to answer.  Many of them were sex related.

1. Has either party been married before? How many times? If so, go through each marriage in chronological order covering the following points to finally determine their present status. Remember to ask about any "common-law" situations or "arrangements" while the man was overseas in the service, etc.

2. When did the original couple become acquainted? (Approximate date and their ages.) Ask the family background, religion, etc., of their parents.

3. How long and what type of courtship did they have? Did they have formal dates? Was petting involved? Fornication?

4. Did they discuss home, family, children?
Meredith was particularity interested in what type of sexual relations they were having.  The more juicy it was the better Meredith loved it.  What did Meredith consider "normal" sex to be considering how preoccupied he was with what he called "abnormal" sex.  That is the sex that has always titillated him.

9. What fruits of point #4 above were evident? Did they buy furniture and dishes, rent an apartment, set up housekeeping, or live with their parents, etc.? Did he properly support her or at least try to be a husband in this regard? Did they make a home and perform the duties of a husband and wife? Did he provide for the home? Did she cook, sew and keep house? Did they have normal sex relations?

10. Was there previous fornication with anyone else or fraud of any kind involved?
 He also had more to his list of things he wanted to know about:

We must judge the spirit of fraud as well--lesbian or homosexual, absolute alcoholic, dope addict, demonism, etc. These are matters affecting the character and being of the individual.

Then to really scare the members into revealing the most intimate details, Meredith make this asinine claim:

Tell the people that what they told us is the basis of our decision. If they have not told us the truth, then they are sternly accountable to God Himself as were Ananias and Sapphira!

Meridith then makes the following comment which shows how manipulative and devious his mind works.  He makes the claim that the church has NEVER asked couples to separate.  However, if they want their salvation assured then they will do it because of that.  They must do it on their own though.   When salvation is threaten to be taken away, what is a COG member going to do?  They are going to do what the minister expects them to do.  Fear is the greatest tool that Meredith had in his arsenal.

Then Meredith tells the ministers to explain to unconverted mates that "just like any other club, the church has its own rules."  Club?  The church is a "club?"

If one of the mates is not interested in the Church, just explain to him or her that just as any club has its own membership rules, God has set down certain requirements that must be met before a person can become a member of the Church of God. It is our responsibility as His ministers to explain these requirements, but what the individual does about it is his own private and personal business.

Meredith also expected his gestapo agents to go to family and friends to dig up more information:

If an antagonistic mate simply will not divulge information on previous marriages, try to find out the basic details from the converted mate--or other relatives or friends--and you may be able to be sure from that. 

Then to further emphasis his deviousness he says:

Do not, under ANY circumstance, put the decision in writing! It could be used against us in court, as occurred in one case that all of you are familiar with.
While he was more than willing to break up marriages an families he did not want the courts to every know what he was up to.

Once Meridith's rules have been enforced and a couple agree to separate Meredith expected them to move long distances apart, preferably to another state!

If they both agree to the separation, we should offer help and advice in carrying out their decision. They should separate geographically--at least a state away in most instances, and in every case should be in different Church areas.

Then Meredith makes a shocking statement.  Apparently incest has been quit common in the Church of God, so much so that the church has even approved it at times!  Of course they did, they had the highest example set for them when they knew about Herbert Armstrong's incestuous relationship with his daughter!
Only in very rare circumstances--perhaps when one or both are senile and when one or the other is crippled or severely disabled--might a brother-sister relationship be approved. In no case, however, should you hold out this hope until this arrangement has been approved by Headquarters! We have found that brother-sister relationships just do not work--even though they might, and I say might, be able to remain sexually separate. They are still living in a husband-wife relationship in their minds. Only in very unusual and extreme circumstances would this arrangement be approved. We have learned some hard lessons on this through the years!

 You can read this entire disgusting letter here:  Roderick C Meredith's Shameful Role in "Divorce and Remarriage " Policy


Sweetblood777 said...

For someone to be so preoccupied with sex tells me that the person is a pervert.

No true minister would ever want to hear sexual details of anothers life.

Run from this demonic, run hard and fast.

Anonymous said...

I agree that this is a disgusting and perverted policy. My previously married mother came into the church at the time it was being dismantled. It nearly destroyed our family but the minister she was interviewing with told her to wait (before divorcing my step-dad) things may change. As a result she came in after. I still get sick and angry when I think of what HWA's little corporation (can't call it "the church" any more) did to our family. It may not have been destroyed, but it was certainly crippled.

And as much as I hate this policy, I have to be fair and honest (can't stoop to their level;) I think the brother-sister reference is meant as "christian" brother sister. Meaning that the couple (not blood relation) may be permitted to have a platonic type relationship after headquarters agrees.

Anonymous said...

Funny how he told them not to put things in writing. Bet he wishes now he'd taken his own advice.

What an awful letter. What an awful mindset.

I remember those days too well. It hurts to recall them. So sad.

Anonymous said...

You know there is such a thing as a sex demon. Maybe Ol' Roddy has been under the influence.

His mind is definitely filthy, perverted and totally obsessed with sex.

Redfox712 said...

Thank you, No2HWA.

It is a shocking letter. Everyone who wants to know what sort of man Roderick C. Meredith really was needs to read this letter.

To say the destroyed couple should move to a different state just on the Radio/Worldwide COG "minister's" whim shows a truly appalling attitude towards people with absolutely no concern for their feelings or how difficult such a move would be for most people.

Saying that a married couple can live together while abstaining from sexual relations just might be a desirable outcome is itself horrifying. To control peoples' sexuality in such an intrusive manner in such an arbitrary manner is just ghastly.

It just defies imagination that such things can happen. But these things did in fact occur.

People deserve to know the truth on this matter.

Redfox712 said...

Here are some words from the preface of Roderick C. Meredith's booklet, God's Plan for Happy Marriage (previous entitled Build a Joyous Marriage).

>>Scores of women have told me, with tears in their eyes: "My husband just won't talk to me! He is distant. He won't share things with me anymore. Even though we share the same house and the same food, I feel so alone most of the time!" ...

The following are just such godly principles gleaned from more than 50 years in pastoral and family counseling, much reading and studying, and more than 45 years of happy marriage.<<

How grotesque it is that one who has destroyed so many marriages in such a premeditated and crafty manner should dare write a booklet telling people how to make a good marriage.

Anonymous said...

Now that comrade League has died Rod McNair is Meredith's chief executioner. He blindly follows orders just like a good soldier. I think he delights in the fact that Charlotte brethren are scared of him. It makes him feel important and powerful. He seems to walk a little taller now that he carries a big stick.

In relation to this post, I find it a good example of how poor McNair's character is that Meredith defamed his Aunt Leona McNair (as proved in a court of law) and yet he supports the Liar In Chief. The prosecutor proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that Rod Meredith treated Leona McNair unjustly and yet her family (Dorothy, Rod & Johnathon) stayed with RCM!

He literally tore their family apart and yet they are so brainwashed that they still submit to Meredith.

It's almost too hard to wrap ones mind around!

Currently, LCG is in full support of the same practices outlined in the original post. Especially now that so many members are disgruntled. There have been cases where the husbands are fed up and want to leave the church and HQ's advice is that the wife divorce the husband and stay with the church! Does that seem like Godly advice?

As has been previously mentioned on this blog, the method of operation for League and McNair has been to isolate the female during their interrogation sessions because they look at them as less intelligent and weaker so they have a better chance of scaring them into revealing intimacies and other information. When the husband's find out, what do you think it does? It drives a wedge between them and creates marital problems. LCG doesn't care as long as it results in them getting the information they want. If marriages and childhoods are destroyed, the ends justified the means. Sometime that's what it takes to purify God's true church...

Anonymous said...

"It is a shocking letter. Everyone who wants to know what sort of man Roderick C. Meredith really was needs to read this letter."

CORRECTION: Everyone who wants to know what sort of man Roderick C. Meredith really IS needs to read this letter.

Anonymous said...

"Sometime that's what it takes to putrefy God's true church..."

Anon2:46 wrote purify by mistake. Fixed if for ya.

Anonymous said...

Now seems an appropriate time to cue Anonymous March 27, 2015 at 2:17 AM.

"Seriously why should anyone give a hoot about this website when it has one of the highest alexa rankings in the world, you people think very highly of yourselves lol when you are nothing. You exagerate everything just to get a few measly comments from people who come here just for therapy because they think they have been so hard done by, man you all are such a sorry depressed lot. Grow up and get a life the lot of you and stop crying over spilt milk."

Yeah! Your destroyed family and everyone in it are nothing and just so much spilled milk to Meredith and his followers. Why, they're not even people, just playthings. Just glasses of milk for others to spill.

I guess everyone else really are "nothing" To Meredith and his titheslaves. I guess it's time we stopped thinking of ourselves so highly. Yaknow, like assuming we're human beings, instead of mere objects: marionettes and playthings.

Black Ops Mikey said...

Let's see now: Roderick Meredith is shrewd, arrogant, abrasive, abusive, oppressive, victimizer, liar, false prophet, home wrecker, gossip and cult leader.


Just the sort of man you need to be your spiritual leader and counsellor.

Anonymous said...

The implications of this are staggering.
I am gobsmacked at this.
Ministers/priests/rabbis have NO right in any way, shape or form to demand details of your life.
And in Christianity where you are supposedly forgiven of all past sin, this is inexcusable and ugly.
I am so out the door from this church.
This was the final straw.

Byker Bob said...

One of these days, one of the tyrants is going to say to himself, "Hey! Who is going to pay all of our tithes now that we've run everyone off and disfellowshipped them?" (I mean, it's not as if there is a line of new people waiting to join.). At that time, it is going to occur to them that they had better do as some of the other cults do, and threaten and intimidate people into staying. Not just with the Germans and Lake of fire, but with actual violence, and a goon squad to follow and harrass ex-members!

Think it can't happen? Guess again!


Michael said...

"If an antagonistic mate simply will not divulge information on previous marriages, try to find out the basic details from the converted mate--or other relatives or friends--and you may be able to be sure from that."

Anyone who isn't totally brainwashed should be able to read this and realize what an absolutely power-drunk mindset this is.
Forcing people to divulge info on previous marriages to manipulate their current behavior. Sheesh, mind your own fricking business.

"Do not, under ANY circumstance, put the decision in writing! It could be used against us in court."

Now that is just too disgusting. They knew what they were doing was sociopathic and didn't want to get caught.

Michael said...

Incidentally I personally knew (and loved) a dear sweet elderly couple in the 80's, who had lived through the D&R nightmare.
Having both been previously married and divorced, and come into WCG as a married couple in the 60s, they were forced to separate, due to WCG's insane doctrine (as described this letter by RCM).
As they recalled to me, they had for more than 15 years (their youngest and not to mention fertile years), been forced to live in separate locations just because men like RCM decided it should be so.
Of course, after D&R got "revised" (New Truth!!!), they were allowed to live together again. How magnanimous of the administration.
(No apologies of course. Just told to rejoice that we have a "new understanding" now! yeah right).
They often recounted those lost years with sadness, but both having hearts of gold (and being very much believers) they held no grudge, which I found amazing even then.

Michael said...

Ah one more thing about RCM.
Maybe I mentioned this before on this blog... but I can confirm his obsession with sex on a personal level.
For some (now unfathomable) reason, as a freshman at AC i requested him for baptism and spent 3 counseling sessions in his office.

Honest to god the bulk of the counseling was not did i understand how to love my neighbor, or humility or other such useful counseling. No, he seemed to be much more interested in whether and how often I fantasized about young coeds and masturbated in private.
The whole ordeal was quite embarrassing for me as I recall. I mean, what did he need with all those details?
Apparently for RCM, your sexual behavior defined whether or not his god approved of you.
Most likely, he has his own sexual issues that are skewing his own perception of human behavior, which he then projects onto others.

Anonymous said...

What a piece of work MISTER Meredith is and has been!

Here's Rod: "Hey, I'm married and know all about sex, but God wants you to tell me more! Tell me all your sexual fantasies! All your sexual exploits! I need ALL the juicy details!"

And in "Club Rod", it was sometimes used to banish members.

"Club"? ... "Rod"? ... Those terms are uh, well, nevermind.

Heck if the church would have better off in population and finances if they'd taken a hint from Scientology.
Scientology is known for gathering people's naughty sexual secrets to build a 'Sword of Damocles' to force them and their money to NOT leave their church!
Now, that's a more successful business model!

Anonymous said...

"You know there is such a thing as a sex demon."

I think I had a few memorable dates with that one!

Black Ops Mikey said...

These days, if a minister starts asking personal questions, particularly about sex, just ask the minister about details of his sex life -- insist that you must have this information because you need to understand his example.

Be sure he leaves nothing out.

Byker Bob said...

One problem, a perhaps unintended consequence of this sex-related grilling, is that the extreme embarrassment of responding to deeply personal questions constitutes a horrible level of duress, which could leave a member thinking there is no reasonable alternative but to lie. You could either tell the ministry that something is none of their business and get disfellowshipped for bad attitude and rebellion, or you could lie to them, later becoming overcome with guilt, and repenting in private.

These are people, and churches, in whom members believe their eternal salvation is vested. A carnal person might make up "freak out" stories about doing it with animals, or possibly shoot the minister the double bird, and walk out. But someone who believes their conversion is rooted in Armstrongism is pretty much an automatic victim of the ministry.


Anonymous said...

"One problem, a perhaps unintended consequence of this sex-related grilling, is that the extreme embarrassment of responding to deeply personal questions constitutes a horrible level of duress, which could leave a member thinking there is no reasonable alternative but to lie."

Yes, I'm sure that folks like Black Ops Mikey and Agent Orange could even give some examples of that phenomenon while expounding on the environmentally-based proclivity a bit.

But again, Scientology is a step ahead of Armstrongism in that they hook up their lie detector before interrogating members of their church.

But as you alluded to, some other cults operate differently, and benefit from the lies of members accentuating and embellishing the descriptions of their sins.
In fact, in some cults, making up sins is a way to gain greater acceptance within the cult with well calculated fibs paying dividends.

Byker Bob said...

Well, anonymous, Scientology appealed to a different demographic. In the end, it doesn't matter, because they were both cults, but back in the '50s and '60s, some simple farm folk might be sitting around the old Philco, listening to the Sunday Evening Rutabaga and Papaya Hour, when suddenly, after the conclusion, the booming, melifluous tones of Herbert W. Armstrong would come over the airwaves, calling them to "God's Truth".

Like lambs led to slaughter, these poor folks would be totally unprepared for the sexual questions a young Rod Meredith type might be asking as he made his way through that summer's baptismal tour. At least, the aspiring Scientologist would have the goal of neutralizing another batch of engrams as the auditor hooked him up to the E-meter.


Anonymous said...

"One of the functions of the huge main frame computer system the church had in Pasadena was the ability to keep member files on every single member. Every letter a person write in, how much tithe money there were paying, how many offerings they made, every question asked, every counseling they had and every comment a deacon, elder or minister ever made was stored in these files. There was no privacy then and certainly still is not today."

LCG does exactly the same thing. Nothing has changed.

"Meredith also expected his gestapo agents to family and friends to dig up more information"

LCG has perfected this tactic. Often sending gestapo agents to inquisition family, friends and acquaintances BEFORE they go to the individuals in question. By the time they get to the members in question, their minds are already made up.