Wednesday, September 6, 2017

Church of God False Prophet Excited By Biblically Prophecied Belgian Dainties

Biblically prophecied chocolates...who knew...who cares!

Church of God false prophets have made a living out of using every imaginable piece of history as proof to prop up their idiotic fantasies that the think prove British Israelism.

Almost-arrested and jailed Elisha, Elijah, Joshua, Amos, Habakkuk, doubly blessed and self-appointed  Bob Thiel is all excited right now by the writings of a former WCG member, Bert Otten,  on his belief that Belgium and Luxembourg are of the tribe of Asher.  Even though none of this is relevant to a New Covenant Christian, those who worship at the altar of Moses still think it is important.

This is what the non-ordained and self-appointed false prophet of the improperly named "continuing" Church of God is excited about:
2nd Clue: Asher – his bread shall be fat
As for Asher, his BREAD [lechem] shall be FAT [shamen] … (Gen 49:20a, KJV). 
Asher’s FOOD will be RICH … (Gen 49:20a, NIV).
Literally it says that Asher’s bread will be fat. It is noteworthy that bread in England and Holland has the form of a big brick, a loaf. In France they sell the typical French bread, long thin pieces of bread. In Belgium they sell bread in big, round, ‘fat’, loaves.
However, lechem also means food in general, and not just bread. Asher’s food would be rich in content, and it would be plenteous… 
3rd Clue: Asher – royal dainties
Out of Asher his bread shall be fat, and he shall yield royal DAINTIES (Gen 49:20b).
[Asher] will provide DELICACIES fit for a king (Gen 49:20b, NIV).
This is up to a point a repeat of the fact that Asher’s food would be fat or rich. We think of all the delicacies – fries, mussels, oysters, fish, venison, etc. – served in the Belgian cuisine, but ‘delicacies’ contains much more… 
Belgian Beers
Wikipedia: For a comparatively small country, Belgium produces a very large number of beers in a range of different styles – in fact, it has more distinct types of beer per capita than anywhere else in the world. In 2011, there were 1,132 different varieties of beer being produced in the country… 
Belgian Chocolate
Wikipedia about Belgian chocolate: Belgium is famed for its high quality chocolate and over 2,000 chocolatiers, both small and large…  
Waffles and sweets
There are also Belgian waffles (Brussels, Li√®ge), speculoos, vlaaien (Limburg), sweets, etc. Asher’s food would be rich and he would yield royal dainties. 
Tapestries, lace, comic books
Delicacies or dainties is a translation from ma’adan:
Ma’adan – or (feminine) ma’adannah {mah-ad-an-naw’}; from ‘`adan’ (Strong, 5727); a delicacy or (abstractly) pleasure (adverbially, cheerfully):–dainty, delicately, delight. 
Some writers about the tribes link this with the typical Belgian delicate tapestries (made for royalty!) and with Belgian lace…

See the rest of this absurdity here:  Former WCG member tying clues of the biblical tribe of Asher to Belgium and Luxembourg


30 comments:

Byker Bob said...

Fantasy! Pure fantasy! I find it troubling that this is so similar to the level and content of the racial chauvinism in Germany during the Third Reich. Apparently to Thiel, anyone theorized to be Israelite is just so far up there on the racial scale. The sad thing is, you don't have to get into racism just to appreciate fine ale or chocolates. Just appreciate the products for their fineness, not because someone allegedly high in someone's racial hierarchy has created these products.

I think I'm going to do a Bible study on the significance of peanuts so that we can "prove" that George Washington Carver was an Israelite!

BB

Anonymous said...

"Literally it says that Asher’s bread will be fat."

Well, nowadays, who isn't fat?

Anonymous said...

I find it troubling that this is so similar to the level and content of the racial chauvinism in Germany during the Third Reich

Well of course, any conservative with a different opinion than the mainstream is called a Nazi, and now some ex-COG members think we were all Nazis when we were in the COG, even though they are some of the most anti-Nazi organization on the planet.

It makes perfect sense to hysterical liberals whose main tools are usually defamation and slander.

Gordon Feil said...

Do any of these self-appointed church leaders ever get any thought to the Great Commandments? If they would put the same resources into teaching people how to have loving relationships, they would actually be rendering a service. But oh wait, you can't really give what you don't have, can you?

Hoss said...

Dr Hoeh wrote an article "identifying" the non-Joseph "lost" tribes. The story was that people asked about the other tribes, and HWA was at a loss since JH Allen didn't include those details - and if he had, he would have come to different conclusions than Dr Hoeh. Possibly one of Dr Hoeh's weakest argument was Finland, said to be Issachar, and it had to do with Finland being the only country to repay its war debts!
As an old boss used to say to me, Why do I need to know this?
Well, Bob tells us:
Knowing where various peoples have come from, help us better understand how the Bible teaches that various ones will be affected by end time events that are still to come to pass.
But that's where his story ended.

...worship at the altar of Moses
A Jewish friend worked at the Salvation Army as an alcohol counselor, and told me all staff had to take part in daily prayers. She said the Major told her that when they "pray to Jesus" she can "pray to Moses". She took it in good humor...

Anonymous said...

well BB, to help clear you conscience, I'm willing to accept your apology for being white.
offer it and I'll accept it on behalf of brown people worldwide.

Anonymous said...

There's only one kind of prophet in Armstrongism. A false one.

Anonymous said...

That's a interesting read. It might be true. Just as Chinese love the color red and Indians bright colors, some nationalities might be genetically predisposed to rich foods. For instance, Italians love their spaghetti, Mexicans their chillies and Chinese their noodles.
These self proclaimed prophets might be right on this one.

BB, you are quick to mock. I suggest you be more broad minded.

Bible Belt said...

Can't we all just get along ?!

Sweetblood777 said...

When I read articles such as this one, the question of what the purpose of this site really is. I had thought that its purpose was to warn us of the unrighteous behavior of the many who lead the churches of God. However, the many articles that are also published here, are attacks on the Bible and its teachings, and thus also against those that believe these teachings.

So has banned gone off the track so to speak, or is its purpose is to knock everything that is Christian? If it is the latter, then I see no reason to continue visiting this site.

Byker Bob said...

Several thoughts.

1) I'm actually middle of the road conservative. I disagree with making certain human issues or science issues into exclusively Democrat or Republican issues. There is nothing Republican about knowing that the glaciers which are the source of the water in the world's great rivers upon which many civilizations have been built are disappearing.

2) Nobody should have to apologize to others for being what they are; they should just work to be a cool example of what they are. Not uppity or arrogant.

3) Bob Thiel bases much of what he says on a racist theory which we were all taught. British Israelism is just as readily provable to be false as is flat earth theory or young earth creationism. People deliberately blind themselves to certain truths for religious reasons. It is that attitude that I mock, not so much the fact that the Belgians are known to have appreciation for certain foods, but that they do this because they are part of Israel and are described in this way in the Bible. That is a Hislop-style leap!

4) I am quick to mock Armstrongism. It had a profoundly negative effect on a 19 year patch of my life (1956-75). I will never become more broad-minded in ways which accomodate false and toxic beliefs that damage and demean humanity. I don't believe that Jesus Christ is going to return to impliment Armstrongism as God's government on planet Earth for all eternity. If I am wrong in this, the only intelligent choice is to take advantage of the way that has been provided to opt out.

Hope that clears the air.

BB

Anonymous said...

Anon at 'September 6, 2017 at 8:59 PM' writes,
"Well of course, any conservative with a different opinion than the mainstream is called a Nazi, and now some ex-COG members think we were all Nazis when we were in the COG, even though they are some of the most anti-Nazi organization on the planet. "

Seriously? I'm not convinced you actually believe that.

But, if you do actually believe that "any conservative with a different opinion than the mainstream is called a Nazi", you are sorely mistaken IMO.

Perhaps you can further explain what you meant, since your earlier comment seemed rather simplistic and in the "knee-jerk" realm.

Personally, I consider my political views somewhat left of center, and I'd never call anyone a "Nazi" simply because they were conservative and held opinions that were non-mainstream.

It seems like you're seeing yourself as a victim who's oppressed by being called a Nazi. If you can give examples of what you said that may have led to anyone calling you a Nazi, please list them here, so we may help you sort it out.

Connie Schmidt said...

Next booklet up from Almost Ordained Bobby Thiel...


"Liechtenstein, Monaco , San Marino and Andorra in Prophecy"

RSK said...

There have always been BI nerds in the COGs. Not sure why Thiel acts like this sort of speculation is new.

RSK said...

Calm down, snowflake.

Anonymous said...

4:21 AM. Even if The Messiah returned to this Earth, ALL of the ACOG cults would still piss & moan against each other. So in answer to your question, NO, they will never get along!!!

Anonymous said...

You have got to be kidding me!
Sadly, I know you're not....

William said...

Good grief Charlie Brown!!

Hoss said...

Gordon asked Do any of these self-appointed church leaders ever get any thought to the Great Commandments?

Anyone can teach that! Only the Mythical True Church has this utterly unique and vitally important truth that was once revealed to God's Apostle!

Anonymous said...

SweetBlood

Bob Thiel is a certified liar that teaches things that are not relevant for Christians. British Israelism has ZERO impact on any9one who is a follower of Jesus. the New Covenant is quite specific that there is neither male nor female, gentile or Jew, nor any other thing you want to compare. Our salvation is secure in Jesus and not in knowing what tribe Belgium might possibly have some connection thousands of years ago. Bob Thiel's teachings are irrelevant and trite but that's what happens when legalists place their emphasis on the law instead of on Jesus. I am glad this blog exposes Thiel and the other liars in the Church of God. Your salvation does not rest in BI, the law, new moons (as James Malm commands) or any other thing they want to dream up.

Anonymous said...

Its about the laughably tenuous connection being made in the article. Get off your high horse already.

RSK said...

I'd almost be interested to see how jovial Asher squares with Belgium's actions in the Congo... but no thank you.

Hoss said...

SweetBlood - Yes, I think a lot of Bob's feature articles should be at best only sidebarred.
But, context! One of the biggest issues of the early believers was accepting Gentiles - so Paul's reference was that Gentiles and Jews who accept Jesus are essentially the same people. Paul also said it's better to be born a Jew.
Bob does say he's in the New Covenant (as stated in Jer. 31) - and the commandments are written on his heart. That's his justification for his cafeteria-style selection of laws to keep.

Retired Prof said...

Sweetblood, I reviewed the description of this site on its home page. You are right that not all the posts and comments fit within the parameters set forth there. As I see it, the reason is that the interchange of ideas here has developed like a conversation; somebody gets reminded of an experience or has read something that has given them new ideas they can't resist sharing, and others take it from there far away from the starting point. For some the resulting interchange serves the same function as group therapy. By paying attention to one another's observations, agreeing with some and refining and extending them, objecting to others and refuting them, we can put our own experiences into perspective. The process is organic rather than constrained by an explicit mission statement.

It's not my place to urge you either to go or stay. I am sure your comments hearten readers who agree with you. They enlighten even readers like me, who often disagree. In other words, you are an asset to the group. On the other hand, you are the only one who knows how much material you can stand to read that seems either off-topic or heretical. It would be unfair of the rest of us to try to guilt you into sticking around against your better judgement.

That's just my take on things. NO2HWA and Dennis Diehl are in a better position to address your concerns.

nck said...

RSK

I am reminded of Herman Hoeh's 1975 sermon at the black feast site during Apartheid times, named: "Why do we gentiles keep the Feast?"

I love his identification with the black community there.

Om another note. I believe you are aware of Conrads "The heart of darkness." And of course Coppolas Apocalypse now based on Conrads chatacter might give you a glimpse of the "jovial" nature of otherwise "tout sweet" people.

Nck

Anonymous said...

Many church members have never read a good self help book, so they do not comprehend that they are only being fed spiritual milk. The COG leaders don't want their members to know this, so they feed them diversionary trite.
The commandments might be written in members hearts, but they are definitely not written in fine detail.

Sweetblood777 said...

To Retired Prof:

Thank you for your observation and advice.

I do appreciate it.

Hoss said...

Tapestries, lace, comic books

Bob didn't include a link to the original article; I'd like to see what the author had to say about comic books.
Two of the more well known Belgian comic books are Tin Tin and Asterix. I wondered if he drew on HWA-style "linguist proofs" and say Asterix is a play on Asher! But in the unlikely event that anyone takes that seriously, Asher means Happy, and Asterix is a play on asterisk, meaning small star.

DennisCDiehl said...

Is there any room for Belgium Waffleling in this prophecy or is Bob just self-Ashured about it all???

nck said...

Dennis.

You should not comment. Since you are genetically predisposed to make a little fun of the fine tribes that settled along the Meuse and weave fine tapestries in order to fulfill their God given destiny as candy magicians.

Nck