Friday, November 16, 2018

The Winter Family Weekend Song


It is rapidly approaching that time of year when several of the larger Church of God's conduct their annual Christmas Family Weekend.

All of the groups have selected sites that are brimming at the seams with Christmas cheer and joyous music, but not a single COG member will ever hear the music, see the decorations and imbibe in the joy of the season.  Yucky-poo on those Christmas cookies!

In honor of that miraculous event, which is on par with the immaculate conception, SHT has composed a new song for United Church of God to sing on their weekend.

Have a holly, jolly weekend
It's the best time of the year
I don't know if there'll be snow
But ignore all the cheer.

Have a holly, jolly weekend
And when you walk down the hall
ignore people you don't know
You're better then them all

Oh, ho, the mistletoe
Is hung where you can see
Listen to ho, ho, ho
Lights surround that tree

Have a holly jolly weekend
And in case you didn't hear
Oh United, have a holly jolly weekend this year

Oh, ho, the mistletoe
Is hung where you can see
Listen to ho, ho, ho
Lights surround that tree

Have a holly jolly weekend
And in case you didn't hear
Oh United, have a holly jolly weekend this year

6 comments:

Unknown said...

SING ALONG TIME-- SING TO THE TUNE OF "RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER"

Tedster , the Red-Nosed minister,
had a less-than-shiny nose.
Filled to the gills with vodka,
anything would probably glow.

Stardom went to his gonads,
& after several long nights of fame...
All of the other brethren
hated that he brought them shame!

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SHT said...

Tedster the Red-Nosed Minister LOL

How about...

Shake Those Jowls With Lots of Flapping! Blurblblrblbrlbrlbrlbrbrbrrrr!
Raise Your Voice with Lots of Yapping! BlabbleBlabbleBlabaBlabbleBlab
Get Mad at a Member Napping! SnxSnxSnxxxxSnxSnxSnxxxxSnxSnxSnxxxxxxxx
All The Holidays Attacking! BahBahBahBahBah...BahHumbugBAH!!

Anonymous said...

Listen to the mocking bird!
Listen to the mocking bird!
As Sagaily and Sagasser meet their doom!

(Old Celtic tone poem)

"1-EX- sheeple" said...

O you talented poets..now who can come up with a parody of the 12 days of Xmas....you know those flapping geese, sparrows or whatever??? :-)

Anonymous said...

We went to Manhattan for Church when we were kids. I remember soaking up all the wonderful lights and decorations and Christmas spirit, and then feeling again left out and lonely. These days, so many of the WCG's have softened their view on these celebrations, but if you're not onboard with the moderation, why would you subject your kids to the contradiction? Methinks they are all closet Christmas keepers. Hypocrites.