Monday, December 10, 2018

UCG: We Are Experiencing Astounding Increases in Viewership of Programs - 13%, 36%, 50%, 137%, 188%, And Yet....


United Church of God has spent 23 years hauling its train down the line and it still hasn't reached any destination.  Twenty-three years as the "new and improved" Church of God and it still has nothing to show but new buildings and some questionable statistics.  Membership has flatlined ever since they imploded and COGWA split off.  But never fear, they want UCG members to feel mighty impressed that they garner huge increases in viewership and that UCG is in the top 14 Christian websites in the world.  (Dave Pack has to be mighty butthurt at that revelation since he claims his website is the most astounding thing to happen to the world since the immaculate conception.)  UCG has spent millions of dollars on those viewers while it has been incapable of drawing them in as members with open wallets.

Peter Eddington went through some of the following statistics as of Nov. 30 this year:
United News circulation is the highest it’s ever been since United began at 16,788. 
Our coworker count is now at 6,338—6% higher than two years ago and 1.5% less than the same time last year. 
Our donor list includes 7,300 people. Our all-time high was 9,564 in June 2016. 
U.S. Beyond Today magazine subscribers are at 258,411. This is just under our September total of 261,408, which was the highest since March 2012. Our U.S. circulation has been right around 250,000 each issue for the past two years. 
Those people on our U.S. file associated with the Church (teens, members, associated attendees) is at 12,418. 
The Church’s Beyond Today YouTube channel (youtube.com/user/BeyondTodayTV) has had 9.5 million video views since November 2006, a 50% increase since last December. The channel has 41,243 subscribers (a 188% increase since last December), and hosts 1,868 videos, which is a 13% increase since last December. This is an average of 2,170 videos being watched every day, an increase of 36% since last December. 
The average YouTube views for the past 12 months is 8,846 videos watched per day, an increase of 137% since last December. 
The number of Google, Yahoo and Bing advertising impressions since 2004 stands at 12.1 billion.  
UCG.org is currently ranked the 14th-highest Christian denomination website in the world. In the past we have been as high as 12th.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...


“Membership has flatlined ever since they imploded and COGWA split off. But never fear, they want UCG members to feel mighty impressed that they garner huge increases in viewership and that UCG is in the top 14 Christian websites in the world.”


The disUnited Church of Godlessness is where unrepentant, unconverted, unbelieving, uncivilized, unsociable weirdos and perverts go to behave very badly while playing church.

Before the UCG-COGWA split, the UCG had produced some half-decent literature. Outsiders can read some of it and learn a little bit from it.

However, if an outsider actually goes to the UCG to attend with it, they will run into all the unrepentant, unconverted, unbelieving, uncivilized, unsociable weirdos and perverts each trying to spout off their own heretical pet theory, and even stalk them.

Therefore, with the UCG, long-distance learning by reading the old literature while avoiding all the fake members and all the fake, newly-credentialed, so-called “ministers” is the safest and best approach.

Anonymous said...

I knew a family that after leaving WCG they would jump to a different splinter group every time a new one got started. LOL

Unknown said...

Lies, damned lies, and statistics" is a phrase describing the persuasive power of numbers, particularly the use of statistics to bolster weak arguments. It is also sometimes colloquially used to doubt statistics used to prove an opponent's point.

The phrase was popularised in the United States by Mark Twain (among others), who attributed it to the British prime minister Benjamin Disraeli: "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics." However, the phrase is not found in any of Disraeli's works and the earliest known appearances were years after his death. Several other people have been listed as originators of the quote, and it is often erroneously attributed to Twain himself

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
TLA said...

Google, Yahoo and Bing appreciate your business. How about FaceBook - they need more money too.

Anonymous said...

Anon 10:07, so what? If they all teach Armstrongism, what bloody difference would it make?

Anonymous said...

Charting UCG's history, you've got the Ministry of Dirty Tricks (MDT) who started out with dirty tricks in WCG and wound up in control of UCG pretty quick, which includes Tkach's hatchet man Vic Kubik, pervert enabler Dennis Luker, Darris McNeeley, and Robin Webber, the identical-twin political operatives who rank as among the most fake and insincere people I have ever had the displeasure of having to interact with.

Then you've got LCG-Lite (LL), the guys like Clyde Kilough, Jim Franks, Richard Pinelli, who rose to prominence and were basically taking control of UCG and sidelining the MDT within their own damn organization, and most egregiously, making plans of what to do with their money. So, the MDT had enough, and had to resort to their old dirty tricks to take back what was rightfully theirs dammit! And I'm not saying that the MDT didn't have some valid points about what was wrong with LL, but that also doesn't mean that any-ol' means automatically justifies the ends. So you've got the UCG church of dirty tricks, and now you've got COGWA, which is basically a little less culty version of LCG. But, hey, if you've already concluded armstrongism is the place for you, all that's left is selecting your favorite brand of Holy Fascism!

So, anyway, as Vic Kubik was trying to "detoxify" UCG in 2010 by doing the same thing his mentor Joe Jr. did, shouting an ultimatum first at the ministry and then the membership of a church, that they could either sit down, shut up, and toe his authoritarian line, or else "there's the door, get out, and we won't miss you," fully anticipating 50% of them would go, in the meantime he figured once they'd reasserted unchallenged authority over UCG and its cash flow again, they could use that to embark on a new evangelism program to fill those empty pews back up again with new, open and eager wallets. See? Easy-peasy. Not gonna miss you, you toxic rebels!

So they hired high-priced business consultants to help them figure out a step-by-step strategy to 1) qualify tithe slave candidates, 2) make tithe-slavery (and ministries of dirty tricks) appear attractive, and then 3) convert them unto Herbert Armstrong, son of god, born of a virgin, who had a 53 1/2 year ministry during which he was continually crucified by mainstream christianity, and then ascended on high to sit on the right hand of the father. (Scoot over Jesus. Christ!)

Besides their low-production-value cable TV program and literature, they even took a hands-on approach to evangelism by doing thousands of "Kingdom Seminars." They even spent up to $250K promoting one of them, in what they must have figured was a field particularly ripe for harvest. Then they analyzed their progress to figure out where the "broken rungs" were on their step-by-step ladder strategy.

Now we have these amazing statistics. I'm amazed. Aren't you amazed?

Basically, all these efforts have resulted in a net result of approximately nothing. Has Vic Kubik considered that it might be easier to solve the empty pew problem by removing half the pews? The congregation that I attended 20 years ago was packed in our rented hall. A couple years back, I heard they'd relocated to a new, smaller hall. Because it didn't make any sense to keep renting that huge hall when it was nearly empty every week.

Maybe Kubik is finally starting to miss all those people he shit all over 9 years ago. He shouldn't. Many of them wouldn't still be there anyway. All he did was hasten their departure. Because UCG has two unsolvable problems, its toxic Ministry of Dirty Tricks and is its toxic product, and UCG as an organization is completely wedded to both of them.

Anonymous said...


Consider the product they are trying to sell:

British Israelism: [Psychedelic Crack-pipe Phantasmagorical Bunk]

Anonymous said...

Anon 8:23 Many of them do not believe in British Israelism.
Anon 6:59 You got it spot on.

administrator said...

None of these groups will grow exponentially because they are not following the Biblical model Christ gave as a commission. I imagine it will not grow much until the 2 witnesses come on the scene

Anonymous said...

@ 11:01 PM, if you don't believe in British Israelism, which was one of HWA's biggest doctrinal distinctives and selling points, shouldn't you be with COG7 instead of an ACOG? One of HWA's most compelling arguments was that since you are in fact an Israelite, God will bless you for living like one, under the laws God said would lead to blessings for Israel instead of cursings.

Oh, you want to stay in an ACOG because COG7 doesn't officially endorse the annual Holy Days? OK, let's talk about the Feast of Tabernacles. When Christ entered Jerusalem, the people waved palm branches at Him. For the Feast of Tabernacles, Israel was told to build temporary dwellings from palm branches.

Can you wave a resort hotel at Jesus Christ? If not, your ACOG-version of the Feast of Tabernacles is a ridiculous man-made counterfeit of the real thing. You would be better off keeping the FOT properly as a member of COG7 or even the SDAs than by making a mockery of it as HWA taught you to do.

Anonymous said...

Deary me, what an attack for merely saying many of them don't believe in British Israelisim.
Anon 6:59 still spot on.

the Ocelot said...

Leo Durocher