Wednesday, December 12, 2018

What it is like seeing the world in a new way after leaving the church


I think this best describes what it feels like for so many when they leave the church and suddenly realize that all of the malarkey we were spoon fed about the "world" was a load of crap. The beauty and complexity of the world is vibrantly fresh, rewarding, beautiful and challenging, all at the same time.

To experience that richness without having to find fault with ever thing is a scary thing for some and it is hard to deal with.  For others the world is waiting to be explored as a world full of grace and beauty.

This was posted on a Facebook group of ex-church members today.  I have permission to post this.

What it was like to leave the church for me and see vibrancy in 'the world' for the first time. When I realized the reality of the relationships I could have had and that I could have nurtured had we not been brain-washed to think we were were special, chosen and set apart. The world was grey, and deceived and they were all bad. They would see some day. 
I think I was more happy than sad though. I realized what lay ahead of me was going to be thousands of times better than what was behind me - but there were and still are some waves of 'could haves'.  
The relationships I have with those still *in* are still also in black and white. And today I realized that some in my life who have left the CoGs, are still steeped in that judgemental critical outlook in select relationships - at least I hope it is in select relationship, because if it is in all of them, their life is sadly miserable.  

Did you experience this bitter-sweetness when your vision altered the first time?

30 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think it will take me a year.

Anonymous said...

No one forced you to stay in any of the cog's. Of course returning to the slop of the world it feels good. Some day you will know what a mistake you made.

Anonymous said...

Trust me, 1:08PM, you haven't experienced slop until you have been in the audience when Rod Meredith shocks mothers and their pre-teen children with graphic descriptions of men needing to wear diapers because their gay partners have stretched their rectum beyond repair. You haven't experienced slop until you have heard Rod McNair stand in front of the congregation and tell lies about brethren he has put out of the congregation. You haven't experienced slop until you have watched so-called brethren tell lies about each other to win the favor of the ministry.

The world is filled with wicked people, it is true. However, in the world it is easy to shun the wicked and seek out the good. In the church, if you shun the wicked you will get in trouble for ignoring or disobeying self-important ministers.

When I was in the church, I watched "new people" enter the church and become worse and worse as their time in the church increased. Rarely if ever did I see a person grow in character after time in the church. In the world, people may improve or worsen, depending on their values and priorities. In the church, you are much more likely to worsen than to improve.

SHT said...

"No one forced you to stay in any of the cog's. Of course returning to the slop of the world it feels good. Some day you will know what a mistake you made."

You are sadly, and greatly mistaken in so many ways your head would spin if you understood what Christianity was and what Christians were called to do. Unfortunately, it appears your head is buried so deep in Armstrongism you wouldn't understand the difference if it stared at you right in front of the face. You believe what you want. It has no effect on me, and many, many others, because our trust and salvation is in Christ alone - not in the scam and non-Christian farce that Herbert Armstrong started. I make no apologies for getting out of Armstrongism. It was the best thing the Lord ever did for me, and He gets all the credit.

By the way. I reject your condemnation and judgement, which has no authority and power over me. As a citizen of the Kingdom and an adopted son of Jesus Christ through His grace and saving power - who has witnessed the hand of God powerfully and undeniably - I reject the lies from the pits of darkness and deception. And I thank God for his grace,love, and mercy.

With that said, God bless. May He open your eyes to the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

Anonymous said...

While the leadership fumble the ball in COGs with a cultish approach, I knew by reading the Bible they were wrong and didn't follow their lead. However scripter does say:
Matthew 8:22 Jesus said, “Follow Me, and let the dead bury their own dead.”
II Corinthians 4:4 “In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.”

But also to have a balanced view:
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.
but according to His Plan we have to wait for the Kingdom and then the 2nd resurrection that most of "Christianity" is blinded toward

James said...

Anon 1:08 PM

I have found more love and peace outside the cog's than I ever found in.
You do not know what you speak of.

Personal Account said...

1:08 PM, Thanks for that Captain Obvious!

Anonymous said...

1.08 PM
The reality is that there are mental cages as well as physical cages. I'II say no more since it's probably troll guy again.

Anonymous said...

Strangely enough - there are people not in a COG with high moral standards and who have a good knowledge of the Bible.
The COGs sell themselves as exclusive clubs where you are automatically special belonging.
Then many of the COGs believe they are the only true church or the only ones doing the work. So you better find the right one.

Anonymous said...

The ACOG leaders, for the most part, are Taco Bell assistant managers who insist that their meat is the world's best, and who say that you will die if you eat at a proper restaurant. That may work if you have only ever eaten at Taco Bell, but once you have tried real food you will never again take the Taco Bell ministers seriously.

Blogger said...

2:35 is clearly a troll.

Anonymous said...

The world keeps evolving around us. I wonder what people in ACOGs do at work when a coworker introduces themselves and informs them of their pronouns..

Anonymous said...

Perhaps the COGs do make people judgmental. That would help explain why there are so many judgmental ex-members who see the COGs in black and white: all black and no white.

Anonymous said...

ummm, no one leaves the Church.

if you stop associating with it, you were never in it.

Anonymous said...

@ 10:40 PM, that's not what HWA taught. What do you think of those scriptures about quenching the Holy Spirit? You can have the Holy Spirit and then tell it to go away.

Anonymous said...

"@ 10:40 PM, that's not what HWA taught."


who cares what HWA taught?

you should care about what God teaches, it's revealed in the bible.

Anonymous said...

Yes, 7:41AM, the Bible reveals that a Christian can quench the Holy Spirit and lose his/her membership in the Church.

Unknown said...

So let me get this straight, you leave a church of God because you utilized your brain and observed cultic behavior.... For that you are considered to have lost the holy spirit... But someone who remains in a cult,turn their eyes to wrong doings, believe in the church to the point of idolatry, idolize the ministry, lose their ability to think critically..... Yet they are considered to be someone who has Gods holy spirit. So in other Words staying in Cogdom means you have the Holy Spirit, you leave you dont have it or automatically lose it. You know I thought I knew a lot when I was in a CoG it's only when I left i realized how bewitched I was(and dumb as well) I no longer seek to explain everything with my superior theological views.

Byker Bob said...

The people within the Armstrong churches, for as long as they are members in good standing, have the spirit of Armstrongism which is actually nothing more than group-think and applied willpower. That’s what people who leave end up shedding and losing.

HWA redefined some words and used them creatively to form illusions. He repeated some words and phrases deliberately, such as “God’s Church”, and “God’s Ministers”. His usage of “Holy Spirit” encapsulated the process of practicing Armstrongism, including the group think and willpower required.

BB

Anonymous said...

For anyone who was ever sincere, the official CoG teaching is supposed to be that the world is a mixture of good and evil. The fruit of knowledge of good and evil remember?

Half of that is good, not just ok, but true good. For some reason the CoGs have become utterly focused on the evil part of that and its made them bitter and hateful towards everyone not in the group.

Objectively, calling the world a mixture is a fair assessment. Since I sincerely believed what the actual teachings said, rather than the culture around them, I haven't had any real surprises since leaving. Both aspects are still true.

FFS said...

Belonging to a group, any group, does not make you a Christian or determine whether you have the Holy Spirit or not. A relationship with God, which is a now thing (Jesus already came, lived a sinnles life, died and was resurrected to make that possible) is between that person and God. I don’t doubt that there are people in every denomination and religion who have a relationship with God, but only God knows intimately who they are. We can know only by the fruits of the Holy Spirit whether they have the Holy Spirit or not. That is biblical.

JRF said...

1Jo 2:15 Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

HWA didn't put this in the Bible, did he?

Unknown said...

Well said.

Anonymous said...

1.09 PM
But the next verse qualified this by mentioning lust and pride.
That's in the Bible as well. Cherry picking scriptures to paint the wrong picture is dishonest.

BB, you meant delusion rather than illusion. Illusion is what magicians use, ie, fool the eyes. Delusion is deceiving the mind.

TLA said...

JRF wrote:
"1Jo 2:15 Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

HWA didn't put this in the Bible, did he?"

It appears HWA had a huge love of things in the world based on all the luxuries he acquired. WCG was a corporation sole - HWA being the sole.
Joe Tkach - as his adopted son - got to inherit extreme wealth tax free.

(Yes - I know - not legally adopted.)

Mario Espinosa said...

This was a very good post. I thank God that He opened my eyes to see the deceptions of Armstrongism and LCG, and that He got me and my family out. We love the people of LCG, but the theology is false. Life outside of LCG and true relationship with Jesus Christ has been way better and much more peaceful. SHT @ 2:10, I really appreciate what you wrote. I couldn't have said it better myself. Take Care and may God Bless you all.

FFS said...

When a person has the Holy Spirit (which is a free gift, not earned), they no longer want to do anything evil. They want to love God and love their neighbor, including their enemies. Family is much closer than neighbor. Love your family. God is all about reconciliation. He produces the fruits of the Spirit in you; they come from Him, not you. The ability to love, have joy, be at peace, and all the rest, is not generated under our own power. Our heart changes after receiving the Holy Spirit, not before. He creates in us a new heart, the old is gone. Then fruits are produced, by the Holy Spirit. Jesus made the way for this to happen. He is the Way, the Truth and the Life. Where is Jesus in the COGs? In the future. They deny Him by focusing on false prophecy and pharisaical rules, on status, power and rulership. Without Jesus, who made it possible for us to have the Holy Spirit, there is nothing. This is biblical.

Byker Bob said...

No, 10:38, I chose my words carefully. I meant illusion. In your defense though, illusion precedes delusion. Shades of meaning, I know, but the two work hand in hand. HWA used one to cause the other, just as he had accused Simon Magus of having done.

BB

nck said...

No no. Adopted is quite good in the Roman Law sense of transfer of assets. (All adopted nobility like Ceasar inherited their wealth that way)

Nck

JRF said...

Jesus taught:

John 15:18 - 19 (NKJV) 18) “If the world hates you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you. 19) If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.