Herbert Armstrong's Tangled Web of Corrupt Leaders

Saturday, March 26, 2016

PCG: Good Posture Improves Your Chance Of Salvation: Men Should Stand Like MEN!



Armstrongism has always filled its magazines with stories that have absolutely nothing to do with Jesus, redemption, grace or anything else that is tied to the new covenant.  This is especially true today in the more right wing personality sects led by Dave Pack, Bob Thiel and Gerald Flurry.

The Flurry camp in Edmond Oklahoma has for some reason decided that Joel Hilliker is morally and spiritually superior to the rest of the church.  As such a pillar of excellence, Hilliker has been given free reign to write some of the most useless articles that have ever filled a COG magazine.

The latest gem that Hiliker is lecturing PCG members that they need to stand tall and erect in daily life, aprtiuarly when they attend church.


Notice the pictures and paintings of the kings of England. These men who sat on the throne of David held a royal bearing that was visible. You see the king’s whole body is strong and upright. The same is true of the queens who have reigned from that throne.

Then there is this:

Now notice the posture of just about anyone around you. Uneven footing, stooped shoulders, arched neck, head dropped. This is not a royal posture. It isn’t even a manly posture. It’s a little closer to a chicken’s posture. 
Men should not stand like this. Men should stand like men!

Leave it to good old British Israelism to cause articles like this crap to be written. Herb always taught us we would be Kings and Priests in that whacky world to come, so we needed to act like one.  This is the  same crap that Hilliker is falling back on.

Since the men of the PCG are God's only chosen forms of true masculinity (sorry Bob Thiel...) they have to act like real godly men.  Given how effemoncat many of the men are on the Edmond compound, particularly in the leadership positions, this article may be sorely needed.

Since the men of the PCG are soldiers in god's new army, they need to learn to stand tall.

A 1946 War Department Field Manual instruction on posture training states, “A soldier is often judged by his appearance. The man with good posture looks like a soldier. He commands attention.” Compare an army of Beetle Bailey slouches to an army that stands like the Queen’s Guards.

How you stand makes a big difference in how you project yourself as a man. A slouched, bent posture reflects weakness and trepidation. When you see a man hunched over his phone, what impression is he creating? A man’s body language can communicate a lot—and most men are communicating with their bodies that they are weak, tired, timid, sheltered, awkward and/or ashamed. Good posture projects more vigor, more authority, more confidence and more power.

Bad posture causes your ribcage to push down on your organs, and they actually can begin to protrude out and push against your abdominal wall. Unmanly! Want to take some inches off your waistline—literally instantly? Stand up straight! Standing like a man reduces beer belly; improves your organ function; prevents humped shoulders; reduces pain in your neck, shoulders and back; and makes you about an inch taller.
Hilliker then even finds a Bible verse to prove his point:

Psalm 37:37 says, “Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright: for the end of that man is peace.” That means to observe, give heed, consider and inspect the man who is whole, lacking nothing in physical strength and beauty, upright, straight, correct or level in a physical or in a moral sense. Look for men who are physically and spiritually strong—and watch them! The word upright literally means “positioned to be straight up.” That means being vertical, erect in carriage or posture. What does such a man have in store for him? Peace, which can mean completeness, soundness, safety or soundness in body, welfare, health and/or prosperity.

Then in a direct slam at elderly PCG men who might have bad posture, Hillier makes this appalling comment:

If you are young and you are not very concerned about your posture in 10 or 20 years, just take a look at a picture of an old man who is not physically upright. Some of the more extreme examples of what age and bad posture can do to a man should make you sit up straight! 

So here's the plain truth on how to stand like a REAL masculine he-man:

Here is how to practice your stance:• Plant your feet shoulder-width apart
• Feel your weight in your heels (not your toes)
• Twist your heels into the ground (so the weight shifts to the outside of your feet) as you tighten your behind
• Allow your arms to hang at your sides and open your palms forward
• Spread your fingers and reach for the ground; feel the weight come off your shoulders
• Imagine you have a tennis ball between your chin and your chest; don’t let the ball fall
• Imagine someone pulling straight up on a hair at the top of your head
• Breathe 
Doesn’t this feel good? You are standing at the full height God made you! You are standing like a man! With practice, this will become how you naturally stand. But it will take practice and effort. You have to think about it.
This is the idiotic claptrap that PCG presents as spiritual meat.  When you turn your back on Jesus Christ, you have to write this kind of useless bullshit.

Friday, March 25, 2016

Church of God legalists in desperate search for "vegan" wines and "mature" barley grains in time for Passover



The uber-legalists of the Church of God are eagerly awaiting the first mature grain of barley to be found in Israel.  In their desperate search they don't concentrate upon farm fields, but spend their time running around the country look for wild barley along side the roads, in parks, along side sidewalks, and anywhere else they can find it.  It's like a treasure hunt to see who can find a ripe grain first.

The Chief Pharisee of the Churches of God, James Malm, is reporting this about the idiotic hunt for a single mature grain of barley.

Update on the barley in Jerusalem… 
I live close to a large park here in central Jerusalem called Bustan Lior – Lior’s garden. It is a large park, about two city blocks, on the slope of a steep hill that is left in a natural state and has heavy concentrations of wild barley. And there is a remarkable variation in the levels of maturity of the barley just within this two block area. All the barley has developed to the stage where the stems have elongated and the seed heads have emerged. Some have developed further to the flowering stage. Some have developed further to the milk stage. 
Some have developed further to the soft dough stage. None has yet developed to the abib stage in this park. Nor have I found any abib barley anywhere in Jerusalem where wild barley grows in almost every open spot, and I look every day as I walk along the streets.   
I will make another update when I find abib barley here in Jerusalem. Thanks.
Next it seems that the Chief Pharisee and his devotees are on a search for wine that is vegan in order to maintain their hypocritical religious purity.  They mooch off of others for all the money they can get and treat non-believer family members like dirt, but are oh-so-righteous when it comes to their wine.
“The majority of people are unaware that wine, although made from grapes, may have been made using animal-derived products. During the winemaking process, the liquid is filtered through substances called “fining agents.” This process is used to remove protein, yeast, cloudiness, “off” flavors and colorings, and other organic particles. Popular animal-derived fining agents used in the production of wine include blood and bone marrow, casein (milk protein), chitin (fiber from crustacean shells), egg albumen (derived from egg whites), fish oil, gelatin (protein from boiling animal parts), and isinglass (gelatin from fish bladder membranes).
All of this foolishness reminds me to the legalists that infected Pasadena HQ for decades.  They demanded that students scrub the teakwood floor in the student center with tooth brushes to get any crumbs out of the cracks and to use toothbrushes to clean the crevices of the dining hall chairs.  Others went into catatonic fits over thousands of pounds of baking soda that were used in the natatorium pool.  They demanded it be thrown out. We of course refused, which infuriated the hypocrites even more.  While these same men were breeding like rabbits with coeds and were major alcoholics, there could be no bread crumbs to be found in their sinful lives.

What more can expect from men and women who worship the law more than they do that inconvenient  dude who said a lot of really inconvenient things that irritate the legalists.

28Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. 30For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.  Luke 10: 28-30 



Sunday, March 20, 2016

Bob Thiel Says Gerald Flurry "Exaggerates"



Bob Thiel, of the improperly named Continuing Church of God, declared today that Gerald Flurry exaggerates (i.e. lies).

Flurry has an article up about the "times of the gentiles." As usually, Bob Thiel knows more about the bible than Flurry does.

Flurry writes:

One biblical prophecy explains the alarming rise of aggressive world powers today. “And when ye shall see Jerusalem compassed with armies, then know that the desolation thereof is nigh. Then let them which are in Judaea flee to the mountains; and let them which are in the midst of it depart out; and let not them that are in the countries enter thereinto. For these be the days of vengeance, that all things which are written may be fulfilled. But woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck, in those days! for there shall be great distress in the land, and wrath upon this people. And they shall fall by the edge of the sword, and shall be led away captive into all nations: and Jerusalem shall be trodden down of the Gentiles, until the times of the Gentiles be fulfilled” (Luke 21:20-24).
We are living in the times of the Gentiles. Our free book The United States and Britain in Prophecy explains who the Gentiles are: any nations not descended from the 12 tribes of ancient Israel. In prophecy, God focuses primarily on two birthright nations (America and Britain) and one scepter nation (the Jewish nation in the Middle East). He uses Gentile powers to punish His chosen people because of their many sins.
Thiel responds:

It is, in my view, truly an exaggerated stretch for Gerald Flurry to claim that Luke 21:20-24 explains our world.

This is rich coming from a man who has exaggerated immensily about his "ordination" process.  Gaylyn Bonjour had no intention of doubly blessing Thiel so that he could start a new splinter group. Not once did he, Rod Meredith, or anyone else ordain Thiel to be a minister, prophet or apostle.  Thiel has exaggerated the entire process.

The so-called double blessed leader of the improperly named Continuing Church of God is just as deceitful and manipulative as Gerald Flurry is when it come to biblical knowledge and control.

Philadelphia Church of God Producing New Musical About Biblical Sex



We all knew it was a matter to time till some Church of God leader put his sex fantasy into music.  This is a Church of God, after all.

Philadelphia Church of God, the aberrant sect of Armstrongism located in the middle of Oklahoma, has set the words of Song of Solomon into a musical stage production.

What a magnificent chorus this will be filled with virginal PCG youth singing about sex, something they are forbidden to partake of during the four years they are on the compound.

Song of Songs by Ryan Malone  
Herbert W. Armstrong College Choral Union 
Mark Jenkins, conductor 
The Herbert W. Armstrong College Choral Union teams up with professional orchestra and soloists to perform a new setting of the greatest love song of all time: the Song of Solomon. The entire text of King Solomon’s Song of Songs comes vibrantly to life in this composition by college music director Ryan Malone, which captures the intimacy and power of this passionate poetry. This oratorio was performed and recorded in January 2012 as an unaccompanied choral work, but it has been orchestrated to capture even more deeply the rich imagery of this immortalized poetry.
THURSDAY, APRIL 7 • 7:30 PM • $15, $20, $25, $30

Some of the fruitful lyrics that will be wafting heavenward will include:

  1. "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth: for thy love is better than wine." A fitting beginning for a pornographic poem. Song of Solomon 1:2
  2. "The virgins love thee." Song of Solomon 1:3
  3. "We will run after thee ... we will remember thy love more than wine." Song of Solomon 1:4
  4. "He shall lie all night betwixt my breasts." Song of Solomon 1:13
  5. "I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste." Song of Solomon 2:3
  6. "His left hand is under my head and his right hand doth embrace me ... stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please." Song of Solomon 2:6-7
  7. "My beloved is like a roe or a young hart: behold, he standeth behind our wall, he looketh forth at the windows, shewing himself through the lattice." Song of Solomon 2:9
  8. "In the secret places of the stairs, let me see thy countenance ... for ... thy countenance is comely." Song of Solomon 2:14
  9. "My beloved is mine, and I am his: he feedeth among the lilies." Song of Solomon 2:16
  10. "Until the day break, and the shadows flee away, turn, my beloved, and be thou like a roe or a young hart upon the mountains. Song of Solomon 2:17
  11. "By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loveth." Song of Solomon 3:1
  12. "I found him whom my soul loveth: I held him, and would not let him go, until I had brought him into my mother's house, and into the chamber of her that conceived me." Song of Solomon 3:4
  13. "Stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please." Song of Solomon 3:5
  14. "Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins." Song of Solomon 4:5
  15. "How much better is thy love than wine!" Song of Solomon 4:10
  16. "Thy lips, O my spouse, drop as the honeycomb: honey and milk are under thy tongue; and the smell of thy garments is like the smell of Lebanon." Song of Solomon 4:11
  17. A garden inclosed is my sister, my spouse; a spring shut up, a fountain sealed." Song of Solomon 4:12
  18. "Thy plants are an orchard of pomegranates, with pleasant fruits." Song of Solomon 4:13
  19. "A fountain of gardens, a well of living waters, and streams from Lebanon." Song of Solomon 4:15
  20. "Come ... blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits."
    Oh, so that's where "blow job" comes from!  Song of Solomon 4:16
  21. "I am come into my garden, my sister, my spouse: I have gathered my myrrh with my spice; I have eaten my honeycomb with my honey." Song of Solomon 5:1
  22. "Open to me, my sister, my love, my dove, my undefiled." Song of Solomon 5:2
  23. "My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him." Song of Solomon 5:4
  24. "I rose up to open to my beloved; and my hands dropped with myrrh, and my fingers with sweet smelling myrrh, upon the handles of the lock."  Song of Solomon 5:5
  25. "I opened to my beloved; but my beloved had withdrawn himself." Song of Solomon 5:6
  26. "His countenance is as Lebanon, excellent as the cedars." Song of Solomon 5:15
  27. "His mouth is most sweet: yea, he is altogether lovely. This is my beloved, and this is my friend." Song of Solomon 5:16
  28. "The joints of thy thighs are like jewels." Song of Solomon 7:1
  29. "Thy navel is like a round goblet, which wanteth not liquor: thy belly is like an heap of wheat set about with lilies." Song of Solomon 7:2
  30. "Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins."  Song of Solomon 7:3
  31. "How pleasant art thou, O love, for delights!" Song of Solomon 7:6
  32. "Thy breasts to clusters of grapes." Song of Solomon 7:7
  33. "Thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine." Song of Solomon 7:8
  34. "Come, my beloved, let us go forth into the field ... Let us get up early to the vineyards ... there will I give thee my loves." Song of Solomon 7:12
  35. "I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate. Song of Solomon 8:2
  36. "His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me. Song of Solomon 8:3-4
  37. "Stir not up, nor awake my love, until he please." Song of Solomon 8:4
  38. "We have a little sister, and she hath no breasts ... But my breasts [are] like towers." Song of Solomon 8:8-10