RCG’s David C. Pack Is Finally Diagnosed

 

RCG’s David C. Pack Is Finally Diagnosed

Marc Cebrian

 

For those wondering what affliction is causing David C. Pack of The Restored Church of God to continuously bumble the date for the return of Jesus Christ, the answer has been finally revealed. 

 

Very few human beings in all of Creation have failed so perfectly at their fundamental purpose, which is why David C. Pack is owed your empathy. Those who have witnessed the biblical epilepsy in person have long understood that which is now becoming public.

 

The Pastor General and self-proclaimed “apostle,” David C. Pack, suffers from the most horrific case of P.A.S.E. That diagnosis goes a long way to explain his prophetic babblings which had its most public expression of symptoms starting in 2015 when he declared himself to be both Elijah and That Prophet.

 

Perpetual, Acute, and Severe Eisegesis

 

There it is. The truth is out now and the healing can begin.

 

The outward symptoms of this affliction include (but are not limited to):

 

• Prophetic amnesia

• Prophetic Alzheimer’s

• Prophetic dementia

• Prophetic diarrhea

• Continually crosses out dates on a calendar that he spent hours to circle in the first place

• Understands that the louder you declare something, the more true it is

• Declares he is right and he KNOWS that he is right

• Believes that jars, spoons, and volleyballs are not ridiculous visual aids

• Knows that no other man on earth can do what he does

• Repeats, “I finally understand…” but in the following days proves that to not be the case

• Uses the word “clarify” as code for “error”

• Regurgitates the same false teachings by merely reshuffling the verses

• Is fully convinced that any other human being can follow his ever-changing teachings

• Thinks every biblical idea he tells the church is given by God

• Sees himself all throughout the Bible

• Believes God has bestowed upon him various biblical titles

• Forgets that WCG used to teach what he said they never did

• Forgets he “already taught this” years ago, thinking it’s new

• Declares it is “the last part of the series” dozens of times

• Asks, “Do you think we have one more year?” seven years in a row

• Declares another “WATCH-me-fail-again” for the entire church

• Believes his ministers prefer to spend their Sundays trimming tree branches with him, rather than having quality time with their wives and children

 

David C. Pack can teach a Master Class in prophetic failure. His track record stands at 100% and that achievement may never be topped in our lifetime.

 

Being diagnosed is the first step to recovery even with the most extreme cases of spiritual fraud.

Please show David C. Pack the same compassion that he would readily express to you.

Jesus has returned to Wadsworth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

While everyone was busy looking at the eclipse tonight, Jesus stealthy returned to Wadsworth and is having dinner with Dave Pack as they plan his official third coming.

Dave has been right all along! Who knew!

Bob Thiel has been preempted yet again!

Wade Cox: Nuclear war the summer and the Two Witless Witnesses to hit the scene around October 2022.

 

No one could have ever imagined that the Worldwide Church of God would splinter into so many absolutely crazy splinter groups that we have today in 2022. Every time we think we have "heard it all" one of these self-appointed morons opens their fly trap and says something stupid. Right now it is Wade Cox, the failed WCG leader who claims that half of the African Continent are members of his cult.

Cox is so far out there that he claims the Koran is a holy book for Christians to be using and that his "god" created a race of human Elohims who have been running around on the earth ever since creation.  They were actually created before his fake "jesus" was created.

His latest:

Trumpets this year falls on 26 September 2022. It is highly likely that if we have Nuclear War between now and September and the NWO is established under the Empire of the Beast of the Ten Toes of Daniel (F027ii,xi, xii, xiii) then God will intervene at Trumpets and send the Two Witnesses of Revelation 11:3 ff. to finally call a halt to the sin and re-educate mankind. They will be here for 1260 Days (see (No. 135) and (No. 141D) when they will be killed by the NWO and God will then despatch Messiah at the Feast of the Passover and Unleavened Bread in 2026 as explained in the paper Fall of Jericho (No. 142). The time of intervention will then be when God sends the Witnesses to restore the Nexus of the Law. They will do that for 1260 days. The NWO and the Beast power will be wiped out in the 43rd month of their rule, in the Northern Spring of 2026 as we anticipate and have prayed for all these years (cf. Wars of the End Part III: Armageddon and the Vials of the Wrath of God (No. 141E) and the War Against Christ (No. 141E_2).

The Perfect COG Meme

 

This is from a Facebook page of a group in Africa that claims they are the Worldwide Church of God and are tied in with Ron Stephens of HWAStorehouse.com.

Nothing illustrates COG mythology more than a white man on a mountaintop, in his Sabbath wear, wearing white socks, and staring off into the distance at something he hopes he qualifies for but is always in doubt because he has always been taught "he is never quite good enough". 

After all, suffering is what good COG members have been told they are always good at.

Dave Pack: Christ Returns TODAY May 15, 2022!!!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Caucasian RCG members finally have a new guest in Wadsworth!!!!!

 

Not much I can add to this epic failure except that Dave added an easy way out and will subject his dwindling flock to more sermons.

"With Part 367 David Pack says that Christ will come back sometime on Sunday 15 May 2022. He will not do anymore sermons because Christ will be back. If Christ does not come back on the 15th it will be one year."