Exposing the underbelly of Armstrongism in all of its wacky glory! Nothing you read here is made up. What you read here is the up to date face of Herbert W Armstrong's legacy. It's the gritty and dirty behind the scenes look at Armstrongism as you have never seen it before!
With all the new crazy self-appointed Chief Overseers, Apostles, Prophets, Pharisees, legalists, and outright liars leading various Churches of God today, it is important to hold these agents of deception accountable.
Herbert Armstrong's Tangled Web of Corrupt Leaders
Many who agree with your stance
on Gen. 6 allege that Satan and Eve had sex producing Cain. Do you agree to this teaching?Absolutely
not! God's word clearly states that Cain was
the product of Adam and Eve (Gen. 4:1). There is no passage in Scripture
where
a sexual union between Satan and Eve is ever
spoken of. Those who promote otherwise speak directly against God's
written word.
(Our research reveals Satan to be a very
frustrated and hermaphroditic entity. Hence, there is hardly any chance
at all
of Eve ever being able to become impregnated
by such a creature. Hermaphrodites don't reproduce very easily according
to God's
laws of physics.)
Aw, I think it could happen. After all, the Deity inpregnated a young virgin but did not marry her so as far as I can tell. That's fornification. She was actually found to be prego by the Holy Spirit, which if a person, introduces the concept of Ménage à trois. Somehow men are married to Jesus by being in the Church and Women are sons of God. Weird.... Abraham , the father of the circumcision is now father of the uncircumcised and "art thou circumcised? seek not to become uncircumcised," however you do that!
IF Satan was Jesus brother, then he'd be obligated to give children to Mary Mag when Jesus died etc. That spawn of Satan may have evolved into the Pope, but I've lost track what I am saying....
Aw, I think it could happen. After all, the Deity inpregnated a young virgin but did not marry her so as far as I can tell. That's fornification. She was actually found to be prego by the Holy Spirit, which if a person, introduces the concept of Ménage à trois. Somehow men are married to Jesus by being in the Church and Women are sons of God. Weird.... Abraham , the father of the circumcision is now father of the uncircumcised and "art thou circumcised? seek not to become uncircumcised," however you do that!
IF Satan was Jesus brother, then he'd be obligated to give children to Mary Mag when Jesus died etc. That spawn of Satan may have evolved into the Pope, but I've lost track what I am saying....
Aw, I think it could happen. After all, the Deity inpregnated a young virgin but did not marry her so as far as I can tell. That's fornification. She was actually found to be prego by the Holy Spirit, which if a person, introduces the concept of Ménage à trois. Somehow men are married to Jesus by being in the Church and Women are sons of God. Weird.... Abraham , the father of the circumcision is now father of the uncircumcised and "art thou circumcised? seek not to become uncircumcised," however you do that!
ReplyDeleteIF Satan was Jesus brother, then he'd be obligated to give children to Mary Mag when Jesus died etc. That spawn of Satan may have evolved into the Pope, but I've lost track what I am saying....
M.T.Ovaries
M.T.
This is all very confusing
It's all so very confusing
Aw, I think it could happen. After all, the Deity inpregnated a young virgin but did not marry her so as far as I can tell. That's fornification. She was actually found to be prego by the Holy Spirit, which if a person, introduces the concept of Ménage à trois. Somehow men are married to Jesus by being in the Church and Women are sons of God. Weird.... Abraham , the father of the circumcision is now father of the uncircumcised and "art thou circumcised? seek not to become uncircumcised," however you do that!
ReplyDeleteIF Satan was Jesus brother, then he'd be obligated to give children to Mary Mag when Jesus died etc. That spawn of Satan may have evolved into the Pope, but I've lost track what I am saying....
M.T.Ovaries
M.T.
This is all very confusing
It's all so very confusing
"Hermaphrodites don't reproduce very easily according to God's laws of physics."
ReplyDeleteThanks for that insightful bit of theological knowledge.
I'm thinking it is more a law of biology than physics? Well unless satan is quantum leaping to get here.
ReplyDeleteSo how exactly does this guy know Satan is a hermaphrodite, or do I really want to know?
ReplyDeleteOur research reveals Satan to be a very frustrated and hermaphroditic entity.
ReplyDeleteWhat the fuck kind of "our research" are they talking about?
This sounds like the kind of craziness you'd find on Daystar, TBN, or God TV.
Norm