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Friday, September 13, 2019
God's ONLY Prophet Lays Down The Law On Sex And The Day Of Atonement
Bwana Bob Thiel has spoken!
No sex on the Day of Atonement!
Furthermore, fasting and sexual abstinence is the norm for those who observe the Day of Atonement/Yom Kippur.
How is Bob going to check to make sure his edict is being enforced?
Surveys? Calls? Texts?
"Yeah, this is Mr. Thiel, just checking in to make sure you aren't at one on atonement".
I can guarantee you those who canoodle on Atonement probably have been eating and drinking anyway. Who would feel up to hanky panky without eating or drinking anyway? Headache and nausea isn't exactly the best aphrodisiac.
Regardless of all that, this is none of Bob's business. As I have said many times here, what goes on in the bedroom is between the couple. No one else. If a couple decides the moment strikes to make the time go faster, good on 'em. Atonement was fulfilled by Jesus Christ, so in my opinion, get it on and then go to a buffet, like Golden Corral.
What percentage of the membership of an ACOG would even have the desire or energy to copulate on a day when you can’t eat or drink? From a guy’s standpoint, you’re always going to want to urinate after sex to keep the urinary tract clean and not all sticky. So, the sex would have to take place during the first few hours of the DOA when you still have urine.
Boy howdy, a legalist’s mind must really be working overtime to think he’s got to issue an edict on such a thing to his followers! But, these dudes always have to have something to bark about.
Thiel is an idiot. Having been married nearly 36 years, and in "the church" 53 years, (without getting too vulgar) I can guarantee that I've "eaten" at least six to ten of those 35 Atonement days, and absolutely no food was involved.
Can I brush my teeth on the day of Atonement, or will that send me to the Lake of Fire too?
What if I lay on my back while I sleep, (as suggested by HWA in the Missing Dimension in Sex) and have a nocturnal emission on the Day of Atonement? Is that a sin to?
"How is Bob going to check to make sure his edict is being enforced?"
One would think that would be a problem, but one would be wrong. Thiel only needs to disfellowship anyone having a baby in June or July, they being nine months after Atonement. While obviously there's a two month window there, and no way of knowing if conception occurred on the ninth day of Tishri or the eleventh, but it's more important to maintain strict obedience than to graciously allow potential sinners into the fold.
Why on God’s earth would Thiel even think it necessary to even mention such a thing? That is absolutely crossing boundaries. I hope his wife gave him a good cuff upside his empty head. SHEESH!!!
How is Bob going to check to make sure his edict is being enforced?
ReplyDeleteSurveys? Calls? Texts?
"Yeah, this is Mr. Thiel, just checking in to make sure you aren't at one on atonement".
I can guarantee you those who canoodle on Atonement probably have been eating and drinking anyway. Who would feel up to hanky panky without eating or drinking anyway? Headache and nausea isn't exactly the best aphrodisiac.
Regardless of all that, this is none of Bob's business. As I have said many times here, what goes on in the bedroom is between the couple. No one else. If a couple decides the moment strikes to make the time go faster, good on 'em. Atonement was fulfilled by Jesus Christ, so in my opinion, get it on and then go to a buffet, like Golden Corral.
I would listen to Kermit The Frog over Bob Thiel.
Bob's church has no members in France.
ReplyDeleteWhat percentage of the membership of an ACOG would even have the desire or energy to copulate on a day when you can’t eat or drink? From a guy’s standpoint, you’re always going to want to urinate after sex to keep the urinary tract clean and not all sticky. So, the sex would have to take place during the first few hours of the DOA when you still have urine.
ReplyDeleteBoy howdy, a legalist’s mind must really be working overtime to think he’s got to issue an edict on such a thing to his followers! But, these dudes always have to have something to bark about.
BB
Hey Bob, that’s the only day that we guys say we have a headache. Honestly though, who gives a shit!
ReplyDeleteYou can make up the difference during the Feast of Unleavened Bunns :)
ReplyDeleteThiel is an idiot. Having been married nearly 36 years, and in "the church" 53 years, (without getting too vulgar) I can guarantee that I've "eaten" at least six to ten of those 35 Atonement days, and absolutely no food was involved.
ReplyDeletekm
Dennis, I always eat bunns "pre-leavening", post-leavening would be gross.
ReplyDeletekm
One more thing, leavening puffs up, sometimes it takes the process nine months.
ReplyDeletekm
Bob:
ReplyDeleteCan I brush my teeth on the day of Atonement, or will that send me to the Lake of Fire too?
What if I lay on my back while I sleep, (as suggested by HWA in the Missing Dimension in Sex) and have a nocturnal emission on the Day of Atonement? Is that a sin to?
"How is Bob going to check to make sure his edict is being enforced?"
ReplyDeleteOne would think that would be a problem, but one would be wrong. Thiel only needs to disfellowship anyone having a baby in June or July, they being nine months after Atonement. While obviously there's a two month window there, and no way of knowing if conception occurred on the ninth day of Tishri or the eleventh, but it's more important to maintain strict obedience than to graciously allow potential sinners into the fold.
km
Why on God’s earth would Thiel even think it necessary to even mention such a thing? That is absolutely crossing boundaries. I hope his wife gave him a good cuff upside his empty head. SHEESH!!!
ReplyDeleteAt-one-ment, aren't you at-one-ment with your spouse if you have sex during the DOA ?
ReplyDelete