The Church of God's littlest prophet, the Great Bwana to Africa and 150 Caucasians and the first Native American Germanic Gentile, has apparently taken the hints offered here and bought himself a new set decoration. No expense was spared!
Let's just say the new decoration isn't much better than his faded-out curtains and crooked bookcases. The Great Bwana needs to ask the local high school theatre department and have them design him a halfway decent set. Buy a stretcher frame and stretch the banner on it so no one sees all the wrinkles and folds. Also, close the damn curtains so the sunlight doesn't bleed in highlighting the edge of the curtains that aren't draped properly.
A bigger chair would also work so that the little prophet would look bigger than he is. Seriously dude, when your shoulders and head are just a few inches above the window sill frame there is an issue! Would a real Elijah ever do such a thing? I do like the blue halo effect over your head, it gives the impression you are electrifying when you are not.
Anyway, the Great Bwana to Africa and the only Native American Germanic Gentile ever to lead the true church in human history, has a question for us to answer. Is he, the Bob, the 21st Century Elijah, and/or one of the two witless witnesses? I know it is a struggle to answer that, but could someone please help him! Bob won't listen to me.
21st Century Elijah
Was John the Baptist the prophesied Elijah or at least a type of Elijah? Is there an Elijah to come? Have Sabbatarians been teaching this a long time? What were 18 truths that Herbert W. Armstrong said God had him restore? Was anything to be restored in the last days, consistent with Daniel 12:4 and Matthew 17:11? Was God supposed to restore dreams and prophets in the last days? Did the Worldwide Church of God teach such would happen again? Have we seen signs of Acts 2:17-18 in the Continuing Church of God? Is Bob Thiel the final Elijah or one of the two witnesses? Why or why not? Has there been the restoration of important truths in the CCOG? Is the CCOG at least setting the foundation for the 21st century Elijah? Dr. Thiel gives information relating to all of that in this sermon.
What a sad set up!
ReplyDeleteIt actually is more befitting of the back of a covered wagon, in an "old west" town set up, with the snake oil salesman pulling back the drapes, and trying to sell a couple of bottles of "Dr. Good Tonic".
Sigh... no, Bob, now youve created too much headroom and your eyes are almost on the lowest third. Either buy a book on how to shoot video or get a local student to help you.
ReplyDeleteOMG!!!! The new "set" is even worse than the old one! I ask yet again, do the doubly blessed feet of our favorite littlest prophlet of all even reach the floor? It almost looks like his head is floating off his tiny shoulders! That blue halo over him just about did me in....my stomach hurts from laughing so hard. You should demand your money back from the high school drama department. Oh gosh, my mascara is running from laughing so hard I can hardly see the keyboard!
ReplyDeleteOhhhh Bob, you never disappoint:-) When will you admit you ARE NOT A PROPHLET? You're breaking one of the Ten Commandments you claim to uphold every single time you call yourself a prophet. Additionally, you are emulating Satan when he fell from God for the sin of pride. You are so full of pride you speak and write about yourself 10x more than Jesus. Just go read one of your own articles sometime (not on a full stomach though) and do a count of the number of times you mention yourself (in creepy third person verbiage, no less) vs. the times you mention His Name.
Just become the littlest Christian of all, Bob. No arrogant titles, no self appointed status, no lies about being a Commandment keeper (none of us are). Just a little Christian. I will ask you one last time, why is Christ never enough for you? Why must you be so smug? I pity you little man. I truly do. But thanks for the laughs!
The answer is NO BOB.
ReplyDeleteThe Elijah to come was clearly identified as John the Baptist by none other than Jesus Christ.
And it is not you. As much as you would love to be in your craving for recognition and a audience.
And you aren’t one of the Two Witnesses either.
You have nothing to offer that has not been offered before within Armstrongism.
And Armstrongism is in steep decline, and your ‘work’ will surely follow this familiar path.
Some things are just meant to remain terminal. It's the natural order.
ReplyDeleteGood grief! What a comedy routine! How can anyone take this guy seriously? Is it any wonder that from all the Israelitish nations (as he calls them) he has only managed to hoodwink 150 or so members. That's hundreds of millions of people and all he can gather up is former disgruntled COG members.
ReplyDeleteBob should just get a green screen for a background, then composite in some interesting (and aligned properly) bookshelves, or maybe a Jerusalem skyline.
ReplyDeleteThat wouldn't take care of the banality of his rambling sermons, most of which are really just short and unfocused sermonettes strung together. But at least he wouldn't be making his viewers' eyes hurt so much.
ReplyDeleteMy theory is that the blue arc is the outside of the earth. Look over HIS right shoulder. Aren't those continents? I can't tell any difference in the curtains.
The prophesied Elijah was/is John the Baptist. Now consider: Jesus has not yet returned. So the restoration of all things has not yet begun because Acts 3:21 states Jesus is in heaven until the restoration of all things. When He returns the restoration of all things begins. John the Baptist will be resurrected, and do what John the Baptist was prophesied to do. Mat 17:11 is misleading in some translations, indicating John will restore then. The Greek however indicates John will restore in the future. It's not: will come first and restore all things, but, does come, and will restore all things.
ReplyDeleteAt least a "Thiel faux pas" isn't something that you wish you could unsee! Friday while on the job, an overweight lady did a "refrigerator man" in front of me, revealing that she was wearing thong underwear. I think it's going to be weeks or months before that ceases being an active memory. Comparing the magnitude of such events, while getting a brief chuckle out of Bob's latest attempt at a studio, at least that's an out of sight-out of mind deal.
ReplyDeleteLooking at Bob's latest CCOG member letter, it appears the non-African membership has gone up by one.
ReplyDeleteThat banner is for Boob's new "radio" website where he makes this hilarious statement:
ReplyDelete"Dr. Bob Thiel’s writings have made him a sought-after expert in the fields of philosophy, religion, research, science, and prophecy."
One thing about Boob is that he is consistent in his lying.
"Good grief! What a comedy routine!"
ReplyDeleteAwesome, as Ron Weinland would say.
Thanks for the laughs, Bob but I still think you should get some help before it's too late.
Clicking on the link provided by Hoss, I read this laughable closing statement made by "doubly blessed almost arrested for Sabbath Keeping" Dr. Thiel: "Radio is one of many “doors” that are NOW opened for us" (Emphasis of the word" NOW" mine).
ReplyDeleteMY COMMENT - I am confused!
I thought God opened the door of Radio to Herbert W. Armstrong. In fact, the Church was called "Radio Church of God" from 1934 - 1968. Armstrong took that name when the broadcast went on air in 1934 from Radio station KORE, Eugene Oregon - the start of the first 19-year time cycle. Is Bobby saying that God closed the door of radio to the Church of God? The door has to have been closed for Bobby to say it is NOW open. When did God close the door, Bobby?
For someone who claims succession mantle from Herbert Armstrong, Thiel sure left out an important piece of Worldwide Church of God history. For those of us who remember Herbert Armstrong's FOT messages, he would always recount the beginnings of the Church on KORE radio on the first week of January 1934. It was used as the benchmark for the beginning of the Great Tribulation with German bombs dropping on America in the first week of January, 1972 (Two 19-year time cycles).
And guess what Bobby? Obviously, you don't remember what Herbert Armstrong taught about the beginning of the second 19-year time cycle in 1953, do you? Herbert Armstrong taught that the open door referred to in Revelation 3:8 was the RADIO broadcast going into Europe in 1953.
BTW, Herbert Armstrong would have thrown you out of the Church. You are NO Herbert Armstrong. In fact, he taught the Church that there was no rank of Prophet in the end time Church the title you falsely claim.
Now, let's talk about an open door you claim God opened to the Continuing Church of God - the open door of animation. How is that open door working out for Cartoon Bob?
Richard
Do the feet of the prophet actually touch the floor when he pontificates? Such a diminutive little guy.
ReplyDeleteLake of Fire COG:
ReplyDeleteYes, Bob does overplay his "open doors". I remember reading some old CG7 info about how they used radio prior to HWA, but it may have only been a few times, like Bob's interviews. One book on cults I read about 50 years ago compared HWA to Aimee Semple McPherson who had radio station KFSG in the 1920s.
As for Bob's entry on European Gospel Radio, the frequency "729.0" he stated is possibly 7290 kHz on which they only appear to transmit for an hour a day...