Crackpot Prophet Says God Sent Snowmageddon to Punish The United States

 

Where would the Church of God be without some minister or leader opening their self-righteous mouths and making an ass of themselves over the latest weather pattern to make the news? Each and every time it is a sure sign from their god that it is pissed off and wants to eagerly punish Americans. No other nation in the world is as evil as the U.S. in the eyes of these buffoonish men...well, maybe except for Britain, New Zealand, and Canada, but even they get a break from the vitriol leaking out the mouths of these so-called men of God.

Bob Thiel, our resident church clown and self-appointed Bwana to Africa and 150 Causaisans,  the world's foremost scientist, historian, and Biblical authority, is bouncing and flailing about in delight over the latest storm to hit the midwest. Because the Great Bwana is the ONLY true representative of God on earth today, it is God's duty to validate everything the prophet speaks. That way, the lazy Laodiceans will wake up and leave the other Churches of God and join the one true church with their wallets wide open for that great final push. Seriously people, how can you not want to see the Great Bwana bouncing and flouncing in Jerusalem for 3 1/2 years?

Anyway, back to that pissed-off god of the Great Bwana.

Scripture is clear that God controls the weather and sometimes provides extreme weather for correction. And that includes snowy weather.

Notice the following:

7 Praise the Lord from the earth, You great sea creatures and all the depths; 8 Fire and hail, snow and clouds; Stormy wind, fulfilling His word; (Psalms 148:7-8) 

 

5 God thunders marvelously with His voice; He does great things which we cannot comprehend. 6 For He says to the snow, ‘Fall on the earth’;… 9 From the chamber of the south comes the whirlwind, And cold from the scattering winds of the north. 10 By the breath of God ice is given, And the broad waters are frozen. 11 Also with moisture He saturates the thick clouds; He scatters His bright clouds. 12 And they swirl about, being turned by His guidance, That they may do whatever He commands them On the face of the whole earth. 13 He causes it to come, Whether for correction, Or for His land, Or for mercy. (Job 37:5-6, 9-13) 

 

22 “Have you entered the treasury of snow, Or have you seen the treasury of hail, 23 Which I have reserved for the time of trouble, For the day of battle and war? (Job 38:22-23) 

 

Snow is something that God controls,

When this giant snowstorm hit the midwest the Great Bwana of Africa and Grove Beach went into orgasmic ecstasy. This storm was PROOF sent by his god to validate his clownish book published in 2009, 2012 and the Rise of the Secret Sect.

The Great Bwana wrote:

Considering all of the natural disasters such as earthquakes, floods, food shortages, and economic problems in the past few years, perhaps this would be a good time to explain that the Bible shows that these problems were expected to occur prior to the great tribulation. Those outside the Bible have sometimes referred to a time such as this as a time of transition or chaos. … 

 

There will be a generation that will experience end-time events, beginning with “sorrows,” including the Great Tribulation, heavenly signs, and finally the return of Jesus Christ (Matthew 24:5-34).

Thirteen years later and the Great Bwana is still beating his drum that every natural weather event is s sure sign from his god that the tribulation is close. Thirty-six years after the death of Herbert Armstrong, also a sure sign the tribulation was close, the constant bleating by the Great Bwana has been proven as inaccurate as Rod Meredith and Gerald Waterhouse. 

Will you continue to ignore the Great Bwana's warnings?

God has long used weather–and early Christians realized this. 

 

So should modern ones. 

 

Even though these current storms are NOT the ‘end of the world,’ extreme weather should be a wake-up call to repent. 

 

The warnings from the Bible are going out, but many will ignore them. 

 

Will you?