Sad, pathetic, and extremely boring Elijah/Elisha still whining that no one believes him

 

Andrew N. Dugger & Clarence O. Dodd had no way of imagining what a horrendous shitstorm they would produce when they named Herbert Armstrong as one of the Seventy in November of 1933. Armstrong was already filled with rebellion at that point and was actively working to separate himself from Andrew Dugger's movement by preaching doctrines and beliefs that Dugger and others did not agree with. Dugger and Dodd had no way of knowing that their acceptance of Armstrong and his ordination would produce well over 450 different splinter groups that in no way ever resembled the original COG movement from the 1930s or even anything else to this day. Rebellion and corruption have been the name of the game in Armstrongism for close to ninety years now. What a sad and pathetic legacy.

These men also never realized that in the perilous end times that their unexpected COG movement would have so many reincarnated Old Testament men now walking the earth leading splinter groups. They had no idea that Elijah, Elisha, Amos, Habbakuk, Micah, Zechariah, Zephaniah, Malachi, and Joel would be walking the earth in the Church of God's leadership. Of course, neither did Herbert Armstrong, yet these self-appointed buffoons are his enduring legacy in 2023.

 

This brings us to today when one of those self-appointed Elijah/Elisha's who currently is having a teeny weenie-pitty-party that NO ONE and I repeat NO ONE pays any attention to him, particularly anyone with a Church of God background. As we all know and according to Bwana Bob Mzungu, there is only ONE person in the Church of God movement that claims he is the Elijah that the original Elijah predicted would come in the end times, and that is our Great Bwana Mzungu Bob Thiel, the Chielf Overseer of Africa and 100 Caucasians. a man sooooooo important that he was part of God's master plan as He was planning the course of humanity, and that would show up in the end times to save the small remnant of believers. No other human walking this green earth is as important and significant as our Great Bwana Bob Mzungu Thiel.

He was working overtime the other day trying to prove his Elijahood status and bemoaning the fact that no one seems to care about ANYTHING he says or does - even his own followers in Africa who are currently working with other Sabbatarian groups.

The Great Bwana Mzungu is once again trying to use Gaylyn Bonjour's so-called "double blessing" as proof we should listen to him. 

...the original Elijah, when he was the top ecclesiastical authority, Elijah did a variety of miracles, such as stopping rain (1 Kings 17:1), multiplying flour and oil (1 Kings 17:13-16), getting a dry passage over a river, (2 Kings 2:7-8), and calling fire down from heaven (2 Kings 1:10-12). 

As if Bwana Bob Mzungu will EVER do this! It's hilarious to imagine it with his arms flaming and hands flapping as he tries to call fire down from heaven. Even the demons hiding in the background would be busting a gut over this scenario! 

Elijah, however, over time seemed to have lost the mental/emotional ability to properly lead (cf. 1 Kings 19:13-18). God later took him and replaced him with Elisha as the top ecclesiastical authority. Elisha then received a “double-portion” (two-portion literally) of the gift that God had given Elijah:

9 And so it was, when they had crossed over, that Elijah said to Elisha, “Ask! What may I do for you, before I am taken away from you?” 

 

Elisha said, “Please let a double portion of your spirit be upon me.” 

 

10 So he said, “You have asked a hard thing. Nevertheless, if you see me when I am taken from you, it shall be so for you; but if not, it shall not be so.” 11 Then it happened, as they continued on and talked, that suddenly a chariot of fire appeared with horses of fire, and separated the two of them; and Elijah went up by a whirlwind into heaven. 

 

12 And Elisha saw it, and he cried out, “My father, my father, the chariot of Israel and its horsemen!” So he saw him no more. And he took hold of his own clothes and tore them into two pieces. 13 He also took up the mantle of Elijah that had fallen from him, and went back and stood by the bank of the Jordan. (2 Kings 2:9-13) 

 

The recipient of the double-portion promise, Elisha, was a type of Elijah. Elisha picked up the mantle of Elijah (2 Kings 2:13) which God wanted him to have (1 Kings 19:16-19), did a similar miraculous dry river crossing (2 Kings 2:13-14), also did other miracles (2 Kings 4:30-35; 2 Kings 10:5-14; 2 Kings 6:16-18), as he replaced Elijah as God’s top ecclesiastical authority on earth (cf. 1 Kings 19:16).

Ah, yes! That infamous "double portion" and the proof-texting involved to transfer this over to the 21st century to a specific self-appointed man-child. Elijah and Elisha were men of extraordinary power and speaking ability who could snap their fingers and miracles happened. Yet today's self-appointed turd in no manner even compares as he is boring as hell and is the clown face of the Church of God movement in 2023.

The Great Bwana Bob Mzungu continues on with trying to prove his legitimacy:

A minister of the Living Church of God prayed and anointed Bob Thiel for a ‘double portion’ of God’s Spirit back in late 2011 and told him that was reminiscent of what happened to Elisha. He also confirmed that God answered that prayer when we met in November 2019.

And has since denied that it was never his intention for Bwana Bob to pervert that prayer into a reason to start a new splinter group and lie about how significant the blessing was. 

Anyway, on with the shitshow:

Interestingly, for several years after Elisha picked up the mantle that Elijah dropped, Elijah was still alive. While many outside of the Church of God seem to doubt this, the following passage confirms that Elijah was still alive later, even though the main work/mantle had shifted to Elisha:

5 Jehoram was thirty-two years old when he became king, and he reigned eight years in Jerusalem… 

 

12 And a letter came to him from Elijah the prophet, saying, 

 

Thus says the Lord God of your father David: 

 

Because you have not walked in the ways of Jehoshaphat your father, or in the ways of Asa king of Judah, 13 but have walked in the way of the kings of Israel, and have made Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem to play the harlot like the harlotry of the house of Ahab, and also have killed your brothers, those of your father’s household, who were better than yourself, 14 behold, the Lord will strike your people with a serious affliction — your children, your wives, and all your possessions; 15 and you will become very sick with a disease of your intestines, until your intestines come out by reason of the sickness, day by day. (2 Chronicles 21:5, 12-15) 

 

The Bible, however, teaches that a voice from the wilderness would come again:

3 The voice of one crying in the wilderness: “Prepare the way of the Lord; Make straight in the desert A highway for our God. (Isaiah 40:3) 

 

John the Baptist said that he was fulfilling this (though he did not indicate he would be the only one to do so):

19 Now this is the testimony of John, when the Jews sent priests and Levites from Jerusalem to ask him, “Who are you?”… 

 

23 He said: “I am ‘The voice of one crying in the wilderness:’ Make straight the way of the Lord,”‘ as the prophet Isaiah said.” (John 1:19,23)

God, Jesus, the Bible, Elijah, Herbert Armstrong, Garner Ted, Rod Meredith, Andrew Dugger, Clarence Dodd, COG Stanberry, COG7, and the entire Armstrongite Church of God movement know for a fact that Bwana Bob Mzungu Thiel is NOT Elisha or even Elijah. He is a liar when he says so. 

Never fear though, the Great Bwana Bob Mzungu goes on to claim that Jesus himself foretold that the second coming of Elijah would be in Bob's body.

But Jesus told of another Elijah to come after He left:

11 Jesus answered and said to them, “Indeed, Elijah is coming first and will restore all things.” (Matthew 17:11) 

 

The Church of God position has been that someone would come in the spirit and power of Elijah to “restore all things” and possibly be one of the two witnesses. While the late Herbert W. Armstrong (died in January 1986) sometimes indicated that he fulfilled that role he told people, that I have personally spoken with, that there could be another other than he. Those with a WCG background might find the following quote from Herbert W. Armstrong of some assistance here as he wrote:

Those called into the Church were called not merely for salvation and eternal life, but to learn the way of God’s government and develop the divine character during this mortal life in the Church age… 

 

Also Malachi 4:5-6 pictures the Elijah to come at the very end of the Church age (Mystery of the Ages. 1985, pp. 201, 349).

So when is this "church age" supposed to come?

And when was the “Church age” supposed to end according to Herbert Armstrong’s old church? Notice:

God has set before us an open door and no MAN can shut it. God can shut it, and He will when the work is finished and the Philadelphia Church goes to a place of safety. …The Laodicean Church is not going to be worthy to escape to a place of safety. When it is too late, they will find that the Church of Philadelphia has gone to safety (What Is the “LAODICEAN CHURCH”? Good News August 1959 Vol. VIII, Number 8). 

 

Now since the Church age has not ended, and the Day of the Lord has not yet come, then it follows that Elijah was to come on the scene publicly after this was written. His restoring of “all things” means that he is to be restoring information that the true Church of God once understood, but later must have lost or misunderstood.

Well, we know for a fact, Herbert Armstrogn never restored all things and Bwana Bob Mzungu has certainly not done so nor will ever do so. That is an indisputable fact!

Those of the true and genuine Philadelphian remnant will pay much attention to the voice of the true final Elijah. Those who do not will not fare as well as they could (cf. Revelation 12:14-17). 

 

We in the Continuing Church of God have also a more sure word of prophecy; “whereunto ye do well that ye take heed, as unto a light that shineth in a dark place, until the day dawn, and the day star arise in your hearts” (2 Peter 1:19, KJV).”

Um...NO, you do NOT! Since Bwana Bob Mzungu is already proven to be a prophetic liar and failure, the above verse in no manner refers to him or his minuscule movement.

Why would any New Covenant believer ever put their faith in the hands of reincarnated Old Covenant "prophet" bouncing around in the COG movement is beyond reasoning? No New Covenant follower of Christ would even be part of these Armstrongite splinter groups that are filled with so much heresy and outright lies.