As usual, church members are apparently tooooooooo stupid to know how to choose appropriate swimwear for Feast of Tabernacles beachwear.
Appropriate Swimwear at the FeastAppropriate beach attire for men and women is swimwear that is modest and in good taste. We are to be guided by the two great commandments—to love God and love neighbor (Matthew 22:37-39; Mark 12:29-31)—so as not to offend God or neighbor by our dress at the Feast. Fathers and husbands have a responsibility to be leaders in their family to teach and guide regarding what is appropriate and what is not (Ezekiel 22:26).
Please forward to Dave Pack! NO SPEEDOS ALLOWED!
ReplyDeleteHope the ladies wear sling-shot bikinis while swimming at the f.o.t.
ReplyDeleteBurkinis! ...or what I like to call the sand ninja.
ReplyDeleteGod approved decadence!
DBP
the absolute best swimsuit is the one you're born in.
ReplyDeleteLCG ladies may not realize this, but it is proper decorum, etiquette, as well as fashion-sensitive to obtain a proper bikini wax prior to the Feast (use second tithe for this) if you plan to wear a bikini while swimming or sun bathing at the Feast.
ReplyDeleteFor those who are planning to use their second tithe for Willie's Reserve or Snoop's Master Kush medical marijuana, please be sure to check the laws for the state in which you are actually keeping the Feast. Your medical marijuana card may not be valid there, and it may be illegal to transport your bud across state lines. Also remember that is a serious violation of state and federal law to be carrying your firearm and your stash at the same time. Remember, your behavior seriously reflects on your ACOG and how others who might be drawn to it perceive it, so act in a way that does not reflect poorly on the church.
The preceding public service message was presented by a concerned person who reads widely, and also knows what actually happens below the radar in the Armstrongite churches.
BB
My wife wants to know how a body offend God when he designed it.
ReplyDeleteIve always said that about circumcision. Seems crazy to have a deity with a mad hate for foreskins that he created, especially with so many nerves.
DeleteMr Gordon Feil,
ReplyDeletePLEASE!
Although I cannot speak for God. When Kingdom comes and I am being resurrected and the first question asked by God for inquisition will be: Is THAt your first act of REsuERrection or are you just happy to see me......?
Be assured that I will be extremely embarrassed if a bodily function like that has offended God.
Then secondly....... the look at my face to discover God is a black man.....
Thirdly, that God has a wife after all.
Fourth...first social function in the Kingdom will be a toga party......
Fifth...
And then I wake up.
nck
Ouch!
ReplyDelete