Job 39
New International Version
(NIV)
Ok...I'm Back...Answer me
this!
39 “Do
you know when the mountain goats give birth?
Yes sir I do...
Do you watch when the doe bears her fawn?
Sometimes...
2 Do you count the months till they bear?
Yes sir...It is 196 to 201
Days of Gestation
Do you know the time they give birth?
Ummmm...Yes sir I do.
3 They crouch down and bring forth their young;
their labor pains are ended.
4 Their young thrive and grow strong in the wilds;
they leave and do not return.
Yes sir, that's how it
works but crossing highways these days is tough on them.
5 “Who
let the wild donkey go free?
Who untied its ropes?
6 I gave it the wasteland as its home,
the salt flats as its habitat.
7 It laughs at the commotion in the town;
it does not hear a driver’s shout.
8 It ranges the hills for its pasture
and searches for any green thing.
Who untied its ropes?
6 I gave it the wasteland as its home,
the salt flats as its habitat.
7 It laughs at the commotion in the town;
it does not hear a driver’s shout.
8 It ranges the hills for its pasture
and searches for any green thing.
Oh no sir...I did not do
it. They are tough to pin down for sure, but it can be done and sometimes
we laugh at them
9 “Will
the wild ox consent to serve you?
Will it stay by your manger at night?
10 Can you hold it to the furrow with a harness?
Will it till the valleys behind you?
11 Will you rely on it for its great strength?
Will you leave your heavy work to it?
12 Can you trust it to haul in your grain
and bring it to your threshing floor?
Will it stay by your manger at night?
10 Can you hold it to the furrow with a harness?
Will it till the valleys behind you?
11 Will you rely on it for its great strength?
Will you leave your heavy work to it?
12 Can you trust it to haul in your grain
and bring it to your threshing floor?
Well sir...now don't get
angry with me, but yes, we have gotten their consent , they stay put in the
stall and barn and they can til up a valley storm. It does all the heavy
work and that's the way I like it. They pull a mean wagon too.
13 “The
wings of the ostrich flap joyfully,
though they cannot compare
with the wings and feathers of the stork.
14 She lays her eggs on the ground
and lets them warm in the sand,
15 unmindful that a foot may crush them,
that some wild animal may trample them.
16 She treats her young harshly, as if they were not hers;
she cares not that her labor was in vain,
17 for God did not endow her with wisdom
or give her a share of good sense.
18 Yet when she spreads her feathers to run,
she laughs at horse and rider.
though they cannot compare
with the wings and feathers of the stork.
14 She lays her eggs on the ground
and lets them warm in the sand,
15 unmindful that a foot may crush them,
that some wild animal may trample them.
16 She treats her young harshly, as if they were not hers;
she cares not that her labor was in vain,
17 for God did not endow her with wisdom
or give her a share of good sense.
18 Yet when she spreads her feathers to run,
she laughs at horse and rider.
Yes sir I sure agree with
you there. Some animals just don't seem to have paternal instincts. Lots
of fish eat their own. I guess that's why the have so many. And
most birds can outfly a horse and rider sir...just sayin'
19 “Do
you give the horse its strength
or clothe its neck with a flowing mane?
20 Do you make it leap like a locust,
striking terror with its proud snorting?
21 It paws fiercely, rejoicing in its strength,
and charges into the fray.
22 It laughs at fear, afraid of nothing;
it does not shy away from the sword.
23 The quiver rattles against its side,
along with the flashing spear and lance.
24 In frenzied excitement it eats up the ground;
it cannot stand still when the trumpet sounds.
25 At the blast of the trumpet it snorts, ‘Aha!’
It catches the scent of battle from afar,
the shout of commanders and the battle cry.
or clothe its neck with a flowing mane?
20 Do you make it leap like a locust,
striking terror with its proud snorting?
21 It paws fiercely, rejoicing in its strength,
and charges into the fray.
22 It laughs at fear, afraid of nothing;
it does not shy away from the sword.
23 The quiver rattles against its side,
along with the flashing spear and lance.
24 In frenzied excitement it eats up the ground;
it cannot stand still when the trumpet sounds.
25 At the blast of the trumpet it snorts, ‘Aha!’
It catches the scent of battle from afar,
the shout of commanders and the battle cry.
Oh for
sure Sir.
26 “Does
the hawk take flight by your wisdom
and spread its wings toward the south?
27 Does the eagle soar at your command
and build its nest on high?
28 It dwells on a cliff and stays there at night;
a rocky crag is its stronghold.
29 From there it looks for food;
its eyes detect it from afar.
30 Its young ones feast on blood,
and where the slain are, there it is.”
and spread its wings toward the south?
27 Does the eagle soar at your command
and build its nest on high?
28 It dwells on a cliff and stays there at night;
a rocky crag is its stronghold.
29 From there it looks for food;
its eyes detect it from afar.
30 Its young ones feast on blood,
and where the slain are, there it is.”
Hawks and eagles are
awesome birds for sure Sir. We...umm...we have gotten pretty good at
using them when needed.
Eagles can be a real
challenge for sure and can they ever find prey
Sir...are you ok? Are
you upset with me?
Oh..no..no..I
just haven't had this conversation in thousands of years and wasn't expecting
your answers. You know your stuff. Hold on a sec...I am going to
have to rewrite the last chapter...BRB....
(waiting)
Err...um...ok.
I'm back. Here goes.....
Job 42
New
International Version (NIV)
Job
42 Then the Lord replied
2 “I know
that you guys have learned a lot since the last time I challenged a man;
Humans have gotten a lot smarter and it's more difficult to question them..
3 I asked who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’
Humans have gotten a lot smarter and it's more difficult to question them..
3 I asked who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’
Boy...did I
ask the right person or what!
Surely I spoke of things I thought you'd never understand, but you did,
really great things and I'm pleased you actually know the answers.
Surely I spoke of things I thought you'd never understand, but you did,
really great things and I'm pleased you actually know the answers.
4 “You said,
‘Listen now, and I will speak;
I will answer you,
and you sure did.’
5 My ears had heard of you
but now my eyes have seen you.
I will answer you,
and you sure did.’
5 My ears had heard of you
but now my eyes have seen you.
I'm going
to have to think up new questions for humans.
6 Therefore I'm sorry
and I'll ask better questions next time
6 Therefore I'm sorry
and I'll ask better questions next time
Good job!”
(PAUSE)
Hey Job...or
whatever your name is.
Do you know
the size of the whole universe?
Do you know
what bosons and quarks are?
Do you
understand string theory and parallel universes if I was to say there really
were such things?
Have you
ever considered the universe is really a hologram?
Ha! Mr.
Smarty....Do you know what a Black Hole the nature of time and space?
I bet you
know how you humans got here don't you....
Yes sir, I do....
You have
done really well. I'm very proud of you.
Thank you for making us
conscious and sentinent beings along the way sir.
You're
welcome...Use it Wisely
Goodbye for
now.....Goodbye sir....
4 comments:
Well, what can I tell you?
In The Last Days Knowledge Will Increase.
Half the words in the book Job are probably quotes from Satan, anyway.
My reason for writing this is to show that what worked as a dialogue between the Deity and a man way back does not work today. The author back then would have thought these were unanswerable questions which today can be answered by most Middle School Children.
This was in response to Bob Thiel's and others insistence on using ancient ideas about the orgins of weather and how the Deity "uses" it and "tries to get human attention."
As the Bible says...The time for this ignorance has passed.
Bob Theil has too little humility to realise that we are like 'tears in the rain' from the universe's point of view.
Here's a song to maybe sum up this 'weather debate':
"All Wash Out"
Here come chilly preacher
Stumbling 'gainst the wind
Singing love, love is something to believe in
A prayer and the sea
And twenty tons of me
Crying love, love is something to believe in
To my child of wonder rambling
All my crooked fingers pointing blame
Let it all wash out in the rain
Yes let it all wash out in the rain
Beyond the drunken focus of my aim
All my heroes twisting in the flame
Let's let it all wash out in the rain
Let it all wash out in the rain
One more for forgiveness
Twisting in the cold
Singing love, love is something I believe in
Too much my defenses
Are dangling from the chain
Oh but free, free is something to believe in
To my god I want my gypsy train
Too my child a howlin' tambourine
Let it all wash out in the rain
Let it all wash out in the rain
Yes let it all wash out in the rain
Let it all wash out in the rain
by Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros
All Wash Out
another seekeroftruth
Since big Christian TV shows hosted by 'Christian' people like Creflo and Taffi Dollar, and James and Betty Robison teach such hogwash...
It makes me realize what a load of crap networks like Daystar and TBN are.
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