Monday, August 12, 2024

Ron Weinland: Wherefore Art Thou?


 

Word is coming in that Ronnie Weinland, the only Church of God leader who is a convicted felon, was a no-show this past Saturday for church services. Usually, when he is missing action he lets his dingy wife speak or one of his ordained women. Not this week though. It was a complete no-show all the way around.

While those in COGland do not believe in the rapture, he could have been whisked away on the wings of a giant eagle to walk the streets of Jerusalem with his dingy wife Laura as the two witless witnesses. Or better yet, he could be on his way to Petra to prepare it for the arrival of the Great Bwana to Africa and his 100 Caucasians. Imagine what a fun time that will be!

I do hope Laura remembered to take all those diamonds so you can bribe the Israeli officials at the border to let you in the country to be the end-time witless witness along with Bob Thiel, Dave Pack, and Gerald Flurry.


 

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maybe Ron is crawling Gomer Pyle-style army crawl across Dave's Wadsworth campus...to conduct a coup d'etat hostile takeover of RCG holdings, & then merge with Dave to predict & prophesy freestyle.

Anonymous said...

Members of Weinland's and other splinters must be getting some comfort by attending their services. Perhaps it's too painful to completely let go of their initial commitment, so they just go through the motions.

Ronco said...

Perhaps Ron is just taking a sabbatical- all that travel, fine dining, tithe collecting and sabbath keeping is a lot of work you know.

Mr. Carter said...

Let's just hope he stays wherever he is. Wouldn't it be nice if he got a new hobby, like Habitat for Humanity?

Anonymous said...

Ya it sure would. Ron can start his 1st habitat by building a popular new teensy-tiny house. (enough space to store his jewelry💎💎💍💰) And advance from there.

Anonymous said...

Ron probably moved to the Haredi community in Israel to try being admitted to the new Nascent Sanhedrin.

Anonymous said...

Ron would love Bnei Brak.
Doubt they would love him.
But a dollar goes a long way in the right hands. Or a diamond lol.
Israel has enough issues to confront without another ‘evangelical’ campaign to indoctrinate/increase the cash flow……..

Anonymous said...

The citizens of Bnei Brak would kick Ron and Laura out of town so fast that their end times witness robes would be flapping in the wind and their bare bottoms glowing. Ostentatious displays of wealth there would not be tolerated nor would the mindless rantings of nutjob American cultists pushing a degenerate form of so-called Christianity.

COG blighter said...

Could this site of Ron's be showing current trip itinerary (if these are indeed for 2024)?

https://www.ronaldweinland.com/upcoming-trips/

"Upcoming Trips
Ron & Laura Weinland continue to visit God’s churches in the various areas of the world where His people are scattered. They continue to work with those whom God is calling, as well as pursuing the ongoing work of training the Church’s ministry. The Church will continue to focus on serving those whom God is calling as long as it is able to accomplish such a work.
August 3
Spokane, WA – Ron & Laura Weinland
August 17
Dallas, TX – Ron & Laura Weinland, Jeremy Weinland
August 24
St. Jacobs, Canada – Ron & Laura Weinland, Johnny & Myrtle Harrell, Beth Bucheit"

I was actually a little impressed to read his acct. of prison workshop labour detail, & health trouble there. Although in no way does it egg me on to give credit to his predictions, or of the assets it's claimed he hoardes from tithes, etc.

Anonymous said...

Here's a video of him doing a sermon on 10 Aug 2024:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmmFh6mRVPg

Anonymous said...

Just when we thought it was safe to come out of the water. But, apparently he's still there, perhaps not as engaged as the Energizer Bunny Rabbit, but, yeah. Still there.

Anonymous said...

Is he still amassing jewelry?