Back in the golden age, when Herbert Armstrong and the Worldwide Church of God were single-handedly ruining the Devil's entire existence with their massive, world-shaking influence, Satan truly had his claws full. But these days? Pfft, it's basically a vacation for him. That once-"mighty" juggernaut has so thoughtfully exploded into hundreds upon hundreds of utterly irrelevant micro-fellowships that collectively couldn't influence a lemonade stand.
Yet—miracle of miracles!—for some completely incomprehensible reason, the Prince of Darkness himself remains laser-focused on sabotaging the single greatest, most incomparably superfantabulously awesome Church of God ever to grace human history. Seriously, no other group (past, present, or future) even dares to approach the blinding radiance of the hilariously misnamed "Continuing" Church of God.
Rumor has it Legion has reassigned its entire elite cyber-demon division to cook up bespoke malware just to thwart the planet-altering ministry of none other than the Great Bwana Bob Thiel. For a heart-stopping moment, it almost looked like the forces of hell might prevail—but take heart, brethren! Our indomitable Super Bob has once again valiantly triumphed over yet another cataclysmic, earth-shattering satanic hacker tantrum. Truly, an inspiration to us all.
We had some issues with the Canadian website, but it is now up and functional again. This seems to have been related to some earlier malware attacks.
9 comments:
You must remember that Bob is God's Prophet. It is ontologically impossible for him to make a mistake or be held accountable for what looks like a mistake. He could never mis-configure a website, or send money to adulterers or witch doctors. And in the Millennium his animated videos will be revered as additional "books" of a multimedia New Testament. So please stop mocking the Blessed Bob, lest you be mauled by bears like those youths who dared to mock Elisha!
Gary must have the distinct privilege of being number one on Bob's prayer list each week. None has been prayed over more than you! Bob's been unable to get his claws into the Churches of God because of this blog.
Elvis is behind this. I know, I heard it on FoxNews Live.
There’s also the possibility that North Korea has intentionally intervened with Bobs website, knowing it is watched by millions ooppps one or two people out there. These two people may well be on an island somewhere in the South Pacific or based on the Space station presently orbiting the globe. I cannot reveal all my sources, but needless to say the Whitehouse is aware of the issues surrounding Bobs webpage. Expect a national address shortly by the President. In the meanwhile get your Xmas trees up, good bargains to be had at Walmart these coming weeks. For those deeply alarmed by these comments of mine, they are in jest. Not to be taken seriously, like Bobs website.
Bob would not get his claws into the Churches of God whether this blog existed or not.
No. It's the CIA. They've finally recognized the CCOG as being His Herbal Essence's only real successor. Just wait until they begin funding him! I believe we can expect a sudden growth spurt now that they have all the information they need from the hack.
Perhaps not. If you are making that statement from the perspective that he lacks the competence to accomplish it, that's the very thing that this blog is continually pointing out. So, you have a firm grasp of the obvious. Kudos. You "get" it.
Bob has shown that he is preoccupied by this blog. The point that his activities are both amusing and appalling to us is not lost on him. So what he reads here does have a cumulative effect on him, consumes his time, and causes him to continually justify and defend his state of wishful existence as a wannabe leader in the remnants of the Armstrong movement. And that is largely due to the fact that a great deal of truth is presented here.
The Malawian Witchdoctors are not happy with Bob, hence the CCOG is all but dead in Malawi except for the Bull 🐂 shit stories Radson Mulowzoa and Big Boss Evans peddle to Pastor Dr Bob. Radson didn't Pay his share of Monies promised to all those Witches, so they let their Demon buddies raise a little Hell with Bobs Canadian Website. They told Radson he best come up with more Kwachies for them or they can't send more Mind Dumbing spells to the Muzungu Prophet in California. There Ju Ju's are starting to fail, cause CCOG Caucasian Brethren are realizing Bobs Malawian CCOG thousands of Members never existed, only what the Big Evans and Radson and Former reinstated Adulterous- Money skimming Deacon Sosten Libungwa tell the Sucka Muzungu Prophet. Bobby's in for a Rude Awakening in the Coming Months unless he Pays Big Time to those Witchdoctors👹👹👹👺👿😈
Your AI image is wrong. The Devils play in New Jersey.
Bob is preoccupied with this blog? Or people on the blog are preoccupied with insignificant Bob?
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