Samuel Kitchen Writes To Harvest Rock To Set Up Appointment For Opportunity To Buy Auditorium

 

And, it just keeps getting worse. Samuel writes:

I just sent an email to the owners of the Ambassador Auditorium. Below is that email.  

 

Hello,

My name is Samuel W Kitchen.

I am a representative of the Worldwide Church of God and I was wanting to talk to someone about the Ambassador Auditorium being for sale.

My people are very excited at an opportunity to perhaps purchase the auditorium. As you know, the membership of the Worldwide Church of God donated originally to build this wonderful structure.

But during doctrinal upset in the 1990’s, and directional differences, church leaders decided to sell off the auditorium, upsetting a great deal of members.

We are interested in talking with someone about purchasing the auditorium, and restore it to the original purpose and usage.

What can I do to move forward towards purchase? I am in talks with membership to see what funds are available, but I wanted to reach out to you and see if something could be started, or at least moved towards.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Samuel W Kitchen

worldwidechurchofgod.org

supportwcg.org

928.358.7302

worldwidechurchofgod@icloud.com

wcgpillars@gmail.com

 

Here we go, Samuel W. Kitchen, valiant knight of the one true remnant, swooping in like a budget Herbert W. Armstrong reincarnate to reclaim the holy grail of mid-century acoustics. Because nothing says "restoring to original purpose" quite like a tiny splinter group with a website and a dream trying to pony up $45 million for a landmark that was sold off decades ago when the actual Worldwide Church of God still existed and moved on."

My people are very excited"—ah yes, that vast throng of loyal supporters, presumably consisting of Samuel, his email aliases, and maybe four or five others who have swallowed his malarkey. How thrilling it must be for them to contemplate reversing the great 1990s doctrinal unpleasantness by... buying back the building they lost fair and square, with zero funds they're "in talks" about gathering. Truly visionary stewardship!

And the polite inquiry: "What can I do to move forward towards purchase?" As if the owners—Harvest Rock Church, who paid good money for it back in 2004 and have been using it ever since—have just been sitting around waiting for a random claimant with a Gmail address and a phone number to waltz in and declare divine right of first refusal. Perhaps they should start a GoFundMe titled "Help Samuel Reclaim the Glory: Because Nostalgia Costs $45 Million."

Rest assured, the sarcasm here is aimed squarely at the letter's audacious tone, not at any legitimate historical appreciation for the venue. The Ambassador Auditorium remains a stunning piece of architecture and history, but this pitch reads like a masterclass in wishful thinking wrapped in faux-Worldwide Church of God stationery.