Showing posts with label angels. Show all posts
Showing posts with label angels. Show all posts

Thursday, December 22, 2011

God Hates Christmas Lights and Ashtrays




My favorite ultra conservative HWA worshiping site is at it again on Yahoo.  This time it's about the "spirit world."  Mind you, some of these are the "good" spirits that God uses to scare the crap out of you so you stop being a wretched sinner.  There is also one that is obviously demonic to him too. This guy has God intervening in his life by stealing Christmas lights off his light strings, then God throws them into the street to warn him to stop keeping Christmas.  Then God smashes his ash tray to make him stop smoking. More magical thinking about a god they need to imagine that does special things just for them since they are the select few in the world.


   I wonder how many of you have had experiences from the spirit world! Way back when my wife and I were first married, we had been living with my wife`s widowed grandmother for several months when we decided to buy our own home. We were both working for the same factory where we had met and we heard of this two and one half story house that was being settled by the heirs of the old woman that had died in that house and had been vacant for several months. The purchase price was $10,500 and we paid the $500 for the down payment and borrowed the rest.
  We would go to our newly purchased house in the evenings for house cleaning since it was in bad shape because of that woman`s age being unable to properly care for it. We would clean till late at night and then would shut off all of the lights. The next night, we found the light on on the floor lamp which I was sure that I had turned off. Then before leaving I made certain sure to shut off all lights. Then the next day, the *cellar* lights were on. This happened several times and then I felt that someone else had a key to that place and so I got a very thin wire to wire the three entrances to see which one was being used for entry. None of those wires were broken, so it had to be coming from within!! The problem finally stopped.
  Then when we were called into the truth and instructed that we need to get rid of all religious stuff from our walls and I didn`t believe that to be necessary and I left this only one item hanging on the wall. I had it hanging on the wall with a nail with a very large head on it to insure it not to fall! Then the next morning I found it on the carpet in pieces!! That thing was made with hard, thick, ceramic type stuff that could not break and especially when landing on the carpet!! It would likely take a hammer to break it!!
  Then at Christmas time I had put strings of lights on the shrubbery of the house and then the thieves would come and steal the bulbs. So we worked wiring the bulbs to the sockets. Then the next night, since they couldn`t unscrew the bulbs, they literally ripped the entire strings of bulbs off of the shrubs and strewn across the street. We finally got God`s messages!!!
   Then when called into the Church, I had a smoking problem and each time the minister and his assistant would come to the house to see how I was doing, I still had not quit and this went on for three years. I had smoked two packs a day for twenty years and was totally addicted. Then this one day, after the minister had left, my wife called me for dinner and as I was asking the blessing, we heard glass breaking from the living room, where I had been sitting, and this very thick astray that I had been using was in pieces!!! Then I was told, "I believe that God is trying to tell you something." I finally broke the habit after our minister, Mr. Bryce Clark told me that If I have to chain myself to the bed, I must quit smoking, and he made me quit before allowing me to attend services. Some thought that he was a bit harsh, but I credit him with not only saving my physical life but my spirit life as well. I could never have quit otherwise. We had been observing all of the Holy days, the weekly Sabbath, as well as tithing all of those three years, then with God`s help, I finally made it though I still craved a cigarette for five years after.
  Then one year at the feast at Niagara Falls, we were all packed packed up and was leaving and was in the outside lane of traffic this guy came barreling out of the mall and instead of staying in the inside lane, he came crashing on across into our lane and smashing against the side of our car and caused me to go over the curb. I tried chasing him because of the damage to our car but he sped away before I could catch him. I pulled off at the nearest exit to check the damage and to report it to the Niagara Falls police but after stopping and checking our car, there was not even scratch. As hard as he hit the side of our car, I couldn`t believe it!! It had to have been an angel of God who had protected us!!
  There have been other times that I can recall when we were protected by God, but this is getting quite lengthy!!

Monday, September 19, 2011

Talk About Some Busy Angels!

click to embiggen

Armstrongism has always thrived on the myth that it's members were going to be whisked away to three an half years of final training in the deserts of Jordan. 

Various evangelists and ministers have come up with all kids of idiotic ways of getting there.  The big thing that was floating around when 1971 hit the scene was that DC 9's (or 10's) would be used to get us there.  At that point in time those planes were having a lot of problems with cracks in their wings.  Some numbnut in Pasadena came up with the reasoning that with all the airliners disposing of those planes we would be able to use them to fly the church to Petra.  God was going to miraculously hold those wings together and not allow them to fall apart mid flight over the Atlantic.  The airline companies would be happy to give us the planes because they all secretly hoped the planes would crash and the TRUE CHURCH would be killed off.  But to our relief and comfort our magical god was going to make it all work out to our benefit.

Now there is some minister telling his congregations that personal angles will be whisking members off to Petra when the time arrives.  I forget where I heard that first.  It may have been in a comment on here.

Tonight there was a comment on the the uber-conservative COG board on Yahoo.  They brought up this very point:

  In Mathew 24 and starting in verse 15, it tells about the coming tribulation and going down through verse 44, do these events follow in exact sequence, and immediately happen just prior to Christ`s return, or could some of these events happen just prior to the tribulation? Who would it be that would be the one taken and the one left? It would seem that since God`s people will be in a place of safety at the time of the tribulation, where would the one be taken to be apparently spared?! Is it possible that in verse 40 and verse 41 that it is referring to those just prior to the tribulation, and is it possible that these verses are speaking about some in the Church where one is converted and the other is not and the converted one taken to a place of safety, possibly by an angel of God?-----I just thought that I would throw this out as food for thought.

You would think after 70 some years of failed prophecies and the public abysmal failure in 1971 and 1975 that these numbnuts would keep their mouths shut!  But no!  It is one speculation after another. 

  Flurry's cult is ready to flee at any moment as they build million dollar buildings around the clock.  Meredith's cult is ready to flee in 2012 or 2016 or whenever Prophet Theil figures out the correct date.

What would Armstrongism be without it's myths, legends and it's magical god?