Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Are You A Half Baked Prostitute?



Apostle Malm has more words of wisdom today for the faithful flock:

1 Cor 3:16   16Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? 17If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are.  11Knowing that he that is such is subverted, and sinneth, being condemned of himself.

Brethren, it is because we have not obeyed the commandments of our God to avoid polluting the congregation with the infidel, that we are now half baked and have become a mixed people; mixing the holy with the profane, the holy having become polluted and lukewarm for the commandments of God!
And why?  We have prostituted our loyalty to the doctrine of our Husband Jesus Christ; for supposed gain of numbers and mammon.

 The Mosaic Covenant ended with the death of the Husband Jesus Christ; Who is the House of the Lord today?  Are not those called out to be a spiritual Israel the Temple and House of the Lord today?  And who shall the Lord send his correction upon, but his House, his people?

Neither our COG Groups nor our national defenses will save us from the wrath of a jealous Husband over his adulterous bride.  You will not be saved because you belong ot some group and consider yourself the temple of God.  Your deliverance comes through your repentant ZEAL for God and his commandments!

These guy gets creepier by the minute!


Knockers Church of God Tells You EXACTLY How Things Were When The Israelites Fled Egypt





The Knockers Church of God wants you to know that they know EXACTLY how things went down when the Israelites fled from Egypt.  This is from their latest article THE REAL ACCOUNT and ROUTE OF ISRAEL COMING OUT OF EGYPT
"Moses married one of Jethro’s daughters, Zipporah. Many claim Moses married an Ethiopian woman which is false. We can be sure that Moses never married a Negro or a Nuba. It’s true, he had married a non-Israelite, but she was a descendant of Abraham, therefore was white, and closely related (Acts 7:29)."

God forbid if Moses had married a black woman! 

"Please take note of Psalms 105:37 There was not one feeble to be found amongst the 12 tribes of Israel fleeing Egypt. Also they tended to live longer in those days, e.g. Moses was 120 years old.

Imagine being slaves for over 400 years with generations being born and dying.  Yet, through it all there are absolutely NO feeble men and women.  No elderly that need assistance.  No small children who cannot walk for miles on end every day.  All strong, healthy, virile macho men and amazon women.


At his death his sight had not dimmed Deut. 34:7. Remember this was just 900 years after Noah’s Great Flood. The Israelites were very fit, and marched, having greater vitality and strength. Wish I could say that of Israel’s descendants today."

"Exodus13:18—“. . . the children of Israel went up harnessed out of the land of Egypt.”
The term harnessed indicates that they went out, not as an unruly mob of fleeing fugitives, but as a well organised body. The Hebrew word “Chamushim” is translated “harnessed” and means “in ranks.” Therefore Israel marched with military precision in ranks of five.

Have they ever wondered how 3,000,000 people could be gathered together on short notice, load up all their belongings, gather their spoils of  the Egyptians, march out of Egypt with all their animals, elderly, and children in a matter of hours so they can set up camp to keep the first  day of Unleavened Bread?  They seem to assume that the second the first person started walking away from Egypt that every single other person started moving at the same time.  That is an impossibility.  Most Armstrongites never think about that.

"The Egyptians had watch posts all through the Sinai Peninsula. It is documented that they flashed messages from tower to tower by day and night, using reflected light. Perhaps this is how Pharaoh knew exactly where the escaped slaves had gone."


"The crossing site is 12 miles long, and miraculously, by the Great God’s design, has an underwater bridge dividing the two deeps. The crossing site is 800–900 metres or 866-975 yards wide, and it descends and ascends on the Saudi side with a 6-7 degree slope. One km further along the coast, the descending approaches 40 degrees. British hydrographic maps illustrate this.
The British Admiralty charts show that the Gulf of Aqaba is like a deep trench, and across that deep trench is a raised area—at the very place the remains"

Did you know that the Red Sea Gulf of Aqaba actually FROZE solid on both sides of the Israelites?

"I have been soundly ridiculed by ministers in God’s Church in the past, for suggesting that Almighty God actually froze the waters of the Red Sea. The evidence is there; for God plainly says, He congealed the waters. Now how does one congeal water? What happens? How could you congeal water (salt water at that)?
The Dictionary defines CONGEALED as “to change from a fluid to a solid or rigid state.”
Strongs Concordance says CONGEAL “to shrink, thicken as in curdled milk or frozen water.”
When the waters were parted by a wind from the East; the Bible says that they were congealed. This word congealed"
"4. These walls of water (ice) stood firm for hours until every Hebrew was safely on the opposite shore, and then crashed down when every Egyptian pursuer was on the sea bed.
5. The sand was also frozen hard to assist wheels of heavily laden, Israelite carts to move along the sea floor. It must have been like concrete. Pharaoh started his pursuit in the morning watch (6-9 am). By 10 am the hot sun was melting the walls and sand on the sea floor; so that the Egyptian chariot wheels would break through the melting, sand floor into ruts and fall off, slowing them down."

"On the sea floor there are two lines of stones with a wide, stone-cleared pathway between them, extending into the crystal clear water! They were dead straight along the edge on both sides. Could it be that Moses had a large team of strong, tough ex-slaves (his “rock group”) going on ahead, tossing the stones out of the way to smooth the pathway for the multitude?"

What this Knockers minister is doing is quoting the material from Seventh Day Adventist Ron Wyatt.  Wyatt was a wanna-be archaeologist that claimed to have found Noah's Ark, the Ark of the Covenant and the remains of the Egyptians  that pursued the Israelites out of Egypt and more.   If I have the correct person, he even came and spoke in the Auditorium in Pasadena and brought wood that he claimed was from the ark   Armstrongism bought into his lunacy lock stock and barrel. His so called research had been debunked for decades.

His work has been debunked thoroughly by professional archaeologists and respected biblical scholars. On August 8, 1996, Joe Zias, Curator of Anthropology/Archaeology with the Israel Antiquities Authority (Jerusalem), issued the following statement:
“Mr. Ron Wyatt is neither an archaeologist nor has he ever carried out a legally licensed excavation in Israel or Jerusalem. In order to excavate one must have at least a BA in archaeology which he does not possess despite his claims to the contrary. We are aware of his claims which border on the absurd as they have no scientific basis whatsoever nor have they ever been published in a professional journal. They fall into the category of trash which one finds in tabloids such as the National Enquirer, Sun, etc. It’s amazing that anyone would believe them…” (http://www.tentmaker.org/WAR/Zias.html).
 Ron Wyatt, the “Indiana Jones” of the SDA Church

Ron Wyatt: Colossal Fraud

A Great Christian Scam

ARCHEOLOGY WITH RON WYATT: a personal account

Amateur archeologist Ron Wyatt is known for making sensational claims regarding alleged discoveries of Biblical sites and artifacts.

Here are just a few of his most amazing discoveries: The true site of the crucifixion; the Ark of the Covenant; the true Mount Sinai (with a plaque announcing it as such); the site of Korah's earthquake; the true site of the Israelites' Red Sea crossing also with a marker 'built by King Solomon' as a memorial; Chariot wheels from Pharaoh's drowned army; the actual rock Moses struck to release water; the ashen remains of Sodom and Gomorrah; Noah's Ark; Noah's grave; Noah's house; Mrs. Noah's grave; Moses' stone tablets containing the Ten Commandments, held together with golden hinges.

Wyatt claims were so fanciful and plentiful, it would seem logical to ask Ron if he had yet unearthed Jesus' High School diploma. Wyatt most bizarre discovery has to be when he claimed to have found the blood of Christ, and a DNA analysis of that blood indicates Christ was born of a virgin.

Although it took several years for reality to set in, most Christian ministries have finally come to disavow Wyatt's work. About the only true believers remaining are ones that continue to financially benefit from promoting his videos.

Ron was either a fabricator or he was delusional, but whatever the case may be, he was clearly one of the greatest frauds the field of Bible prophecy has ever seen. Wyatt's years of research may amount to nothing more than garbage, however, he did help prove that some Christians are limitless in their gullibility. Ron Wyatt



Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Apostle Malm: Today's Topic - Whores and Sexy Trees



Apostle Malm wants you to know what a whore is.  Apparently the Churches of God are filled to the brim with whores and whore mongers who are out cavorting under the groves of trees.
What is a whore?
What is a Whore?  Let us look beyond the sexual and we shall see that a whore is a mercenary who has NO loyalties and will sell herself to whoever will pay her price.  A whore is a woman who’s loyalty of for sale!

While whoredoms is the act of selling that loyalty.

We espoused ourselves to a Husband at our baptism; we committed ourselves to be ONE with him!  To be of the same mind and spirit, to live by the same principles and laws, to internalize the very mind of our Lord and to become completely ONE mind and spirit with HIM!

If we then follow any other, we have betrayed the loyalty we vowed to our Husband!  In the emotional and spiritual sense we have become Adulterers and have committed whoredom!

If we idolize anyone or anything above the law of our God and above his will; we are apostates and rebellious adulterous wives UNFIT for entering the marriage of the lamb as his bride!



 What are sexy trees?

In ancient Israel it was common to sacrifice to strange gods at high places [hill tops], and in the shadows of trees;  this is because like today these false religions were covertly if not overtly sexual; and the trees had their sexual meaning, while the idea of a high place was to be closer to the gods [stars] of the heavens.


Monday, April 23, 2012

Mr. and Mrs. Weinerdude Cannot Die!

The Two Witless Witnesses


Armstrongisms' biggest fool has opened his mouth and made an ass of himself yet again.  According to Mike (Don't Drink the Flavor Aid) Weinerdude claims that the two witnesses cannot die.

Apparently the two witless witnesses have been living through great persecution over the last 3 1/2 years.  With the coming of Christ at the end of May this year, the two witless witnesses will have fulfilled their commission.  Mr and Mrs. Weinerdude will be come god like God is now.

Weineerdude writes:
The two witnesses will not be killed in the literal city of Jerusalem.  And their dead bodies will not lie in the streets for 3 1/2 days.  God’s two witnesses will live right up to the coming of Jesus Christ, coming to this earth as the king of kings.  This 3 1/2 days spoken of here about the two witnesses is fully about the past nearly 3 1/2 years, what we have been living.

That kind of flies in the face of what Weinerdude wrote in his comedic book on prophecy 2008 God's Final Witness.

It is now with boldness, confidence and great clarity that I give to you what God has given me. I am to announce, through God's direct revelation, that I am one of those two witnesses. The other witness will be revealed to the world during the time of the great tribulation—within the final three and one-half years of man’s era. During that period of time, we will, together, completely fulfill all that God has given us to witness to this whole earth. Then, at the end, we will die in the streets of Jeruslaem; and finally, exactly three and one-half days later, we will be resurrected (Revelation 11). The world will see this resurrection via television. At this same time Jesus Christ will appear in the heavens above the earth as He is returning to take the reigns of man’s government on earth. (Weinland R. 2008: God’s Final Witness, p. 16)

Weinerdude later names Mrs. Weinerdude as the second witless witness. Do they die or not die, that is the question.  With any luck Weinderdude will be imprisoned by the IRS before that time.