Saturday, April 22, 2023

Would You Help Build A Library In Petra Dedicated To The Worldwide Church of God And Herbert Armstrong?

More from the Kitchen clan:

Samuel Kitchen dreams of building a library in Petra to house the world of Herbert Armstrong and the Worldwide Church of God. Would you be willing to send him money to do that?

Last fall I went to Jerusalem and then to Petra! 
The Scripture that stuck out to me on this trip was Jeremiah 6:1. 
"O ye children of Benjamin, gather yourselves to flee out of the midst of Jerusalem, and blow the trumpet in Tekoa, and set up a sign of fire in Bethhaccerem: for evil appeareth out of the north, and great destruction." 
Another scripture that stuck out to me on this trip was Revelation 12:14. 
"And to the woman were given two wings of a great eagle, that she might fly into the wilderness, into her place, where she is nourished for a time, and times, and half a time, from the face of the serpent." 
When we reached Jerusalem, we found out we could not stay in Jerusalem as it was too dangerous for us there. We fled to Petra. And in Petra we kept the Feast of Trumpets, The Day of atonement, the Feast of Tabernacles and the Last Great Day. 
We had made a proclamation in Jerusalem, for all members of the Worldwide Church of God to join with us in Jerusalem for the Holy days, but soon after, we had to flee and find refuge outside of Jerusalem. 
We had gathered in Jerusalem just to flee the city. 
When staying in Petra I couldn't help but think on God placing His name there. Could it be "her place"? 
Satan was obviously upset with our proclamation in Jerusalem and us being in Petra. 
I haven't had such trials before. Christ was showing me sins to overcome and how to deal with certain situations. 
I can't help to be thinking about going back to Jerusalem sometime soon. I made some dear friends in Petra. They are like family. 
I want to build a library of church materials and establish it in Petra. I think, even if I don't make it, 
I want God's people to have access to God's truth. And with God placing His name there last fall, I wonder...when has God placed His name in Petra for His Church? So I've been thinking about that. 
How many would contribute to a fundraiser used to build a library for the Worldwide Church of God in Petra? 
Let me know below in the comments.

Loneliest COG Prophet On Todays COG Leaders: "All they can do is teach Armstrong's works... God has not used them or revealed anything to them"


Today's COG leaders worshipping at the feet of Herbert Armstrong

The world's tiniest little prophet, Bob Thiel, has been left in the ditch by the world's loneliest prophet. Never has God worked magnificently in one man as He presently does in Tony Roach. Bob Thiel cannot ever reach past the ankles of this man! 

He claims all of the COG leaders today are stuck in the blindness of Herbert Armstrong (which is true) and in the so-called Philadelphia Era (which is true)..

Everyone thinks you can just start a church and God comes to you... That is NOT how God works... As the Philadelphia Church of God, the Living Church of God and every other church on this earth... God always has and will choose His own leaders for His people. in every era, even the Laodicean era... If you were around you could have heard Armstrong say that many times... God would not even let His chosen King David build His church... He always chooses who HE wants.... Like it or NOT... God does NOT care what you think... Or I think or any other man... You may not approve of God's choice, I don't either and that's why I'm constantly trying to quit this job... Believe me this is no party for me... If I new then what I know now I would have never prayed to prophecy.... Because I do not like letting the evil know... 
These splinter groups eyes have been closed once again and they are very high minded and judgmental which is some of the reasons they missed the Spring Harvest of Souls... And will die in their sins before the Fall Harvest in 2031... And that is why it is recorded...

...They can't tell you of the Abomination that Maketh Desolate and how it was set up in the Temple of God (WCOG) by Tkach... And how to count the days of Daniel to foretell the exact date Tkach would sell the church to Joel Osteen... And the exact date of 9/11... I was there and I saw it all... I waited and I watched... And I counted the days and was able to foretell both events and give exact dates... I told everyone even wrote President Bush several times and all the news stations... No One listened because I am No One...
These splinter groups doesn't even know that the Spring Harvest of Souls past in 2020 as a thief in the night when the world was shut down for the corona virus... I prepared my people and that's why they are gone... And I prayed everyday to be left behind because No One would be left to take care of my babies... And little did I know God had a job for me here on Facebook to reveal even more of His secrets and mysteries... And to prepare the chosen few for the tribulations...
These blind leaders of the blind can't even tell you who the two witnesses are going to be...
They can't even tell you what the Time Times and a half means in Daniel...
They can tell you nothing but what Armstrong wrote... They are just making millions off of Armstrong's hard works... If Armstrong could speak from the grave he would be saying open your eyes prove all things... He would be very disappointed in you... Think have they ever healed anyone... NO... Have they told you ANYTHING that Armstrong did not tell you... NO... They give you world events you could get on CNN or Fox News.... Have they foretold anything that has come to pass... NO.... Have they done anything other than repeating Armstrong's hard works... NO...
As 1 Thessalonians says God's chosen will know the day of the Lord and it will not catch them unaware... They cannot tell you this date, 9/28/31... They are asleep at the wheel... And they are about to take you over a cliff...
They cannot tell you and show you that the Kingdom of God is on the sun...


...could go on and on about what I can show you and they have no clue... But there is no changing your mind... It's already been recorded... Everyone has already determined in their simple human minds how much sin God will allow from them... Some think when Jesus returns they'll get a do over or Jesus will just make them perfect... That is not going to happen and they are no do overs... One day I may tell you of this great mystery... I just don't know... The WHOLE world has been deceived (Rev 12:9)... 
You are following someone that doesn’t have the Holy Spirit because if they did they would have the wisdom of God things would be revealed to them…. and they would know these things…. Actually only very few people have had the Holy Spirit dwell inside them... Many think they have but again they are deceived... This is how you know... When you lay your hands on them and they are healed that second... When your thoughts and desires come to pass before you have a chance to ask for them... When the Bible seems as though it is written by a child it is so easy to understand and see the future and all these things I have shown you and more... These are just a few examples to know you have the ALL powerful Holy Spirit inside you... You have the POWERS OF GOD inside you and at your fingertips...

...Have you seen any of your ministers heal the sick? NO... HAve you seen any of your ministers raise the dead?... NO... These things I do and much more with the POWERS OF GOD as you can read about a few of them throughout my post... As recorded... 
Matthew 10:8 Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out devils: freely ye have received, freely give. 
And I do COMPLETELY FREE as recorded... 
So continue following them... Stay in that ditch... Because that's why God chose someone like me so you wouldn't believe and you would judge me and you would be snared and taken... For the same reason He chose the Apostles as they were like I am... 
These blind leaders of the blind are stuck in the Philadelphia era... They think God's Master Plan stopped with Armstrong... They are totally deceived and deceiving you... All they can do is teach Armstrong's works... God has not used them or revealed anything to them Because He can see in their hearts... And in your hearts also... You cannot deceive or con God... But you will not see that until you are brought up out of your graves in 1,008 years... And then it will NOT be what you think... 
The chosen few has changed since Armstrong's era... And that's why you missed the Spring Harvest of Souls and WILL miss the Fall Harvest also... Listening to the blind leaders of the blind... Because they have NO clue... The problem is you LOVE your ministers and churches more than God... And HE knows this that's why He has blinded your eyes once again....


Philadelphia Church of God Youth Choir Now Singing Music Of A Pedophile


PCG coyly posts this without mentioning Michael Jackson

Man in the Mirror (Siedah Garrett, Glen Ballard; arr. Ryan Malone) 
Conductor:  Mark Jenkins 
Armstrong Youth Chorus

Anyone who was in the PCG 10 years ago can tell you that never would a Michael Jackson song be used. Never. Nor would it even be played at a youth camp dance because they disagree with his lifestyle and what he stood for; i.e., “Jesus Juice”; etc. It was common for PCG to shun any sort of music, artist, etc. who had their sinful lifestyle out in the open. This is common knowledge to anyone familiar with the PCG. 
The fact that they have now used MJ’s song, which was clearly permitted by Stephen Flurry, indicates to me that when SF finally gets to completely take over he will “liberalize” the PCG. I think he can look at PCG’s trajectory: financial records, membership numbers, and recognize that something needs to change if he and his family are going to continue to be supported financially by the PCG. He is not going to be able to continue the ruse as his father and HWA before him. PCG has already lowered their standard for who they invite to services and they still attempt to block out those they deem too strong-willed and uncontrollable. But other than that it’s “come as you are as long as you tithe.”

In another letter to ESN there was this:

April 21, 2023 
I just watched that YouTube clip [about “Man in the Mirror”]. It seems to me that quite a large number of those singers in the youth choir aren’t really all that enthusiastic about it. Some faces seem, to me, to be bored with it all. They are stuck in the PCG by their parents and have no way of escaping unless they are prepared to be cut off by their own parents should they decide to leave. Also, they will lose all of their close friends if they decide to leave the PCG. Cutting off family and friends is a known cult tactic designed to keep members from leaving a cult. 
In spite of that, people do leave and then have to suffer the consequences of their actions sadly. “Liberalism” such as having the choir sing a Michael Jackson song won’t stop PCG members from leaving if they have a strong desire to get out. Those young people are not of that generation that knew of Michael Jackson [or The Beatles] but their parents were. The PCG, just like the WCG, have to always be a generation behind in following fashion trends so that they are not considered to be “worldly.” However, worldliness catches up with them eventually as a generation moves on, so they actually become worldly anyway, in spite of being so careful about being so. –Australia

Friday, April 21, 2023

Bob Thiel Finally Admitting That Witch Doctors Are Active In His Church?


After several recent accusations that witch doctors were/are active in some of his churches in Africa the Great Bwana pitched a fit and said it was impossible! How can that be when God himself set up the improperly named "continuing" Church of God and doubly blessed the Great Bwana! Seriously!

Even when presented with the evidence he still stuck his head in the sand.

Today he doubled down and said that these witch doctors have no power over his work, Jesus or God. Thiel has called the representatives he sent to Africa and who later confronted him about appalling conditions in Africa as being liars. Now he called them not true Christians, men blinded by Satan. Standard COG mythology. One should always remember that there is only ONE true Christian on the face of the earth today: the Great Bwana himself.

Bwana said:

Those who are not being true Christians can be blinded by Satan, real Christians cannot be.

The Apostle Paul warned:

30 Also from among yourselves men will rise up, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after themselves. (Acts 20:30)

Brethren, do not let those who speak perverse things deceive you.

The greatest speaker of perverseness to the African members of the improperly named "continuing" Church of "god" is Bob himself followed by at least two of his so-called evangelists. 

It has long been reported here and in various Sabbatraian news networks that African Sabbatarians will church hop from one denomination to another till they find what they need. While the leaders may be more devoted to the Sabbatarian myths, many members til cling to tribal traditions in order to remain part of their communities.

Many in Africa, Haiti, and various other parts of the world believe that witch doctors are powerful. Various ones have succumbed to such superstition.

The Bible opposes the use of witchcraft and casting spells as the following shows:

10 … one who practices witchcraft, or a soothsayer, or one who interprets omens, or a sorcerer, 11 or one who conjures spells, or a medium, or a spiritist, or one who calls up the dead. 12 For all who do these things are an abomination to the Lord, and because of these abominations the Lord your God … (Deuteronomy 18:10-12)

Someone recently asked me if true Christians can be blinded by demonic curses from “powerful witchdoctors.” My response was no.

Since Bob is not a true Christian where does this place Bob in the grand scheme of things? He is right that real Christians do not have anything to fear, but this is Bob talking, and who has made an entire lifetime of talking about anything but Jesus and what's been accomplished and understood by multiple millions of Christians down through the ages. At least until the ugly head of the improperly named "continuing" Church of God reared its ugly head.

Wednesday, April 19, 2023

Petulant Crybaby Prophet Upset WCG And Others Did Not Agree With His Looney Prophecy Shtick


God's ever-whining and most disrespected modern-day prophet is bemoaning the fact that the old Worldwide Church of God, some of its members, and today's Churches of God aren't living lives consumed by prophecy.
The fact that this little crybaby is still dealing with his rejection not only by Rod Meredith and the Living Church of God but also by the old Fresno Worldwide Church of God. How dare they! Laodicean heathens! 

Right after the Berlin wall fell in November 1989, I was asked to give the closing prayer at WCG church services in Fresno, California. In that prayer, I mentioned that we were witnessing prophecy being fulfilled right before our eyes. One of the reasons that I stated that was because many in that congregation seemed to be losing their zeal and belief about Bible prophecy. They did not seem to see the prophetic significance of what was happening. Many who once were believers, no longer loved the law of God. Some even became scorners (Psalm 1). A major falling away was occurring.

People, in and out of the Church of God, now have less respect for the entire Bible.
This includes one-time WCG members who did not repudiate many of their original beliefs, but instead who basically did not consider prophecy that important and/or who are now holding to prophetic beliefs that are clearly in error. The bulk of Christians were or became Laodicean.

Those who understand church eras, also understand that the Laodiceans were prophesied to be the bulk of the Christians in the end times. And that has happened. They think because they did not actually lose their religion, they are fine. Jesus, however, said otherwise in Revelation 3:14-22.

The fake self-appointed prophet is still whining that today's COG members, particularly the unaffiliated ones will NOT join his cult. Thank God!!!!!!!!

As far as for those who consider themselves COG and unaffiliated, most of them are either Laodicean or confused. My prayer is that they will diligently seek the truth and support the Continuing Church of God as we lead the Philadelphian remnant. As far as being unaffiliated goes, Herbert W. Armstrong wrote about being “independent”–he opposed that. 

Herbert Armstrong vehemently opposed little upstarts like the improperly named "continuing Church of "god" splitting off from the Worldwide Church of God. Not only did whiney Bob do it once, but three times!

Dave Pack: "...finally, finally, I understand why my last name is Passover."


A False Passover


David C. Pack of The Restored Church of God taught a false Passover.


The second Passover is NOT Iyar 15.

The second Passover is Iyar 14.


During “The Greatest Unending Story! (Part 435)” on April 15, 2023, David C. Pack declared the Kingdom of God would arrive on the second Passover on Iyar 15. But he had the wrong date.


Part 435 – April 15, 2023

@ 04:46 So, Iyar 15 starts the second Passover. That’s a little under twenty days away. Iyar 15. And it’s a moed. We’re waiting for a moed.


@ 05:25 So, Iyar 15 is a Passover. It is the Passover. In fact, it’s an absolutely commanded Passover. That has to be kept by people who are either unclean or on a far journey.


@ 07:08 So, Iyar 15 is the only biblically sanctioned date for a Passover.


Sometimes you are too close to something to see it. I usually fact-check Dave when he makes odd assertions to determine if the statements are true or imagined. The second Passover being on Iyar 15 was so central to his entire theory it never crossed my mind to look it up.


Until I received RCG’s Announcement Bulletin for April 15.


Second Passover Reminder:


As a reminder, if you are a baptized member and were unable to keep the Passover because of illness, inclement weather or other uncontrollable circumstances, you may still observe the second Passover (Num. 9:1-13). This year, it falls on the evening of Thursday, May 4 (the start of Iyar 14). Its observance is exactly the same as the Passover of Nisan 14 (with foot washing omitted if alone). If you need the Passover service DVD and letter, please contact your local minister as soon as possible.


This contradicts Dave. But what does the Bible say?


Numbers 9:10-11

Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, If any man of you or of your posterity shall be unclean by reason of a dead body, or be in a journey afar off, yet he shall keep the passover unto the LORD. The fourteenth day of the second month at even they shall keep it, and eat it with unleavened bread and bitter herbs.


The second Passover is Iyar 14, not Iyar 15. The second Passover on the wrong day is the foundation on which the entirety of Part 435 is established. All his subsequent "proofs" dissolve once a light is shined on his disingenuous premise.



@ 04:46 So, Iyar 15 starts the second Passover.


Did David C. Pack make a mistake, or did he lie?


If he made a mistake, he is incompetent and unfit to be Pastor General of The Restored Church of God. It also means Jim Habboush and Andrew Holcombe are equally deficient because they failed Dave when he needed them most.


This is what happens when a man thinks he knows what the Bible says without carefully reading what the Bible says. Dave's piss-poor reading comprehension can only be applied when he bothers to read it. But I suspect the situation is far worse than that. Not quoting Numbers 9:1-14 was a conscious choice.


If he knew it was Iyar 14 and hid it, that means neglecting to read Number 9 during the Bible study was not just an oversight but part of a calculated deception. That sounds like what an Angel of Light would do. That sounds like David C. Pack knowingly lied to the brethren of The Restored Church of God.


Around the 8-minute mark of Part 435, Dave explains the second Passover but does not read Numbers 9. The only logical reason for this choice is because when the brethren hear David C. Pack read, “The fourteenth day of the second month…” it would be a jolt that could potentially rouse the sleepiest of sleepyheads in the audience.


David C. Pack cannot read a verse that clearly states the "fourteenth" when he teaches it is the "fifteenth." This would expose him as a liar. It would expose his craftiness. It would reveal him handling the word of God deceitfully.



Does God use liars to disseminate His truth?


That should be a rhetorical question. But, based on the Headquarters ministry passively agreeing without protest and the brethren passively agreeing by staying, it is a question those people should ask themselves. They seem to not know the answer.


Whether David C. Pack made a mistake or lied, are we to believe every minister at Headquarters did not know which day the second Passover actually was? Dr. Jaco Viljoen knew. As the Director of Church Administration, it is part of his job to ensure the field ministers are prepared to assist brethren with the second Passover.


The Announcement that now humiliates Dave crossed Jaco's desk. So, Jaco either told Dave his theory was based on the wrong day by presenting an uncomfortable fact, or he remained silent as all hireling enablers do over there.


It could be he was hearing the content of Part 435 for the first time, like everyone else in the room. Did he immediately go to the back of the Main Hall to notify Dave he had the wrong day? Did ANY of them do that?


I reached out to Dr. Timothy Ranney at RCG Headquarters this morning for clarification. I left him a voice message. As of publishing this article, I did not receive a response. If one comes, I will report it.


@ 33:49 Numbers 9:10, you’ll recall, I said the second Passover rule allowed for those who are on a far take the second Passover. In fact, you’re commanded to.


Again here, he refers to a verse he likes but ignores the verse he does not like.


Numbers 9:11

The fourteenth day of the second month at even they shall keep it, and eat it with unleavened bread and bitter herbs.


This Bible verse shames David C. Pack and the entire Headquarters ministry.


He could not read this verse and deliver Part 435. He could not have done it. And he knew it. Instead of being truthful with the Scriptures, he chose duplicity.


These techniques reveal his true character and what type of man he is.


In another opportunity to be honest with the Bible, Dave cites Hezekiah’s second Passover in 2 Chronicles 30 but opts to not read the verses. Why?


2 Chronicles 30:15 

Then they killed the passover on the fourteenth day of the second month: and the priests and the Levites were ashamed, and sanctified themselves, and brought in the burnt offerings into the house of the LORD.


Reading about the second Passover directly from the Bible confirms it is never on Iyar 15. If you think his not reading those verses is just a coincidence, then I fear for you. David C. Pack wants to establish doctrine without going to the Bible because the Bible would unveil his fraud.


Dr. Ranney, please call me back. I would like your side of the story.



@ 46:46 You can’t do it in Abib because if your plan in the next year to have ‘em in captivity fifth of Abib, but you want’em to keep the Passover the next year, it’s perfect. It’s perfect. It’s almost unbelievable how that lays out so perfect. In fact, it’s perfect twice.


It is almost unbelievable how transparent this lie is now. And, as it turns out, this theory is not perfect. Even once.


@ 13:33 So, Asaph carried a meaning and an application we never saw before. You can blow the trumpet on the full moon of the Feast of Tabernacles. You can blow the trumpet on the full moon of Abib 15 at the first Passover. And you can blow a trumpet on the full moon of Iyar 15 on the second Passover. They're the only three times in the calendar year in the sacred year you can do that, and it's a chag. Second Passover.


The second Passover is Iyar 14, not Iyar 15. Details are only for doctors and lawyers, it seems.


@ 47:19 Anybody getting close to being convinced that this couldn’t be any other day?


The most casual reader should be convinced the second Passover is Iyar 14, thus another day.


@ 59:19 …but I mean, as I am want to say though this long Series, there are many nights where I say, “Well, did we understand the Mystery of God if we didn’t know this?”…We knew the Mystery of God. Really? I don’t think so. We didn’t.


The Iyar 15 hoax does not change that.


His “proofs” about the Sabbath and almond trees also collapse. In fact, we may need to tear up and throw out all of Part 435 weeks sooner than planned.



David C. Pack's unnecessarily provocative comments make a different impression now.


@ 09:18 Now, let’s imagine. If Christ kept a different day than Iyar 15, what a terrible example to the world. It would be of disobedience to God’s law that brought death for anybody else.


If Jesus Christ decided to do that on Iyar 14, He would uphold the law and be a wonderful example to the world. The direct inverse of what Dave just said.


@ 10:54 So, if Christ kept a different day, this would be God (or we might say more directly) Christ saying to the world, “Do as I say, not as I do…


David C. Pack’s own words haunt him. His own words identify him. His own words convict him.


He is not speaking from the mind of God nor preaching the truths of the Bible. David C. Pack is fulfilling the phrase, “Believe me, don’t believe your Bible.” And he gets away with it.



I shudder to think the Iyar 14 fact almost slipped by unnoticed. But, the men at Headquarters noticed. RCG brethren, write and call to find out what they did about it. Hold your “leaders” accountable for their continued silence and inaction when a blatant ruse is being perpetuated by your Pastor General.


If it was a "mistake," then there was a failure of leadership worthy of disqualification from holding any religious government office. They had four days to issue a retraction or “clarification” via email or Member Services. Do not hold your breath on that coming.


David C. Pack knew the second Passover was Iyar 14, but that did not fit his prophetic failure escape plan. That is the only reason he chose not to read the few Bible verses that explain it.


Brethren, many lies does David C. Pack need to tell you before you wake up and take action? He only has power because you allow it. Do not look to the cowardly Headquarters hirelings for support or guidance. They operate in a perpetual wait-and-see mode. This is just another doctrinal bump in the road to ride out.


When you are asked before the Judgment Seat of Christ why you said and did nothing, what will you say? 


The false apostle is counting on the ministers being too weak and the brethren being too asleep to do anything about it. And both groups are proving him right.



The man cannot teach about the Passover without a reminder of his personal “specialness.”


@ 1:03:07 And by the way, finally, finally, I understand why my last name is Passover. Jews all know that David Passover. In fact, it's David Passover, in a way, to start the year and end twice. Not the first Passover. The second Passover.


He connects his name directly to the false teaching of the second Passover on Iyar 15. That is sobering.


David C. Pack taught a false Passover because he IS a false Passover.

Marc Cebrian

See: False Passover

Sunday, April 16, 2023

Do you really need 28 tips on prayer?

One of the most absurd expectations for church members over the decades was the concept of spending one hour every single day on your knees in prayer. While the benefits of prayer have been established as beneficial for a person by all kinds of studies, it was the near command that church members spend one hour every day that was absurd. Pretty soon, as a reader here noted the other day, a person starts repeating themselves over and over. It's nothing new after a few days and usually ends up as petitions for God to step in and fix problems for the person or endless prayers for the so-called work that some splinter groups claim they are doing.

The Great Bwana to Africa has set out a list of 28 expectations he believes his followers need to be doing.

28 Tips on Prayer 

People talk a lot about prayer.  So? Christians through the centuries have found it beneficial to their mental health and well being, just as those in Armstrongism claim to.
Many pray in public.  Yeah, and so what? Prayer in communal public worship is just as edifying as prayer in a closet or sitting on a rock in the woods. A person praying on a street corner makes most Armstrongites and the public uncomfortable. Yet, for that one individual who may find meaning and the need for prayer that day it may have life changing affects on the person. Armstrongite manipulators of scripture love to twist this and accuse Christians of doing it wrong, when in actuality the COG has been doing it wrong for decades!
Does God listen? This is a loaded question when an Armstrongite says it. They want want church members to believe that God only listens to them. Its not cool when a Hindu, Muslim, Buddhist or God forbid a so-called Christian offers up a heartfelt prayer since God supposedly only listens to  COG prayers. God supposedly does not hear these "unconverted people". Anyone who has ever interacted one on one with people of other faiths can realize they can make as many bold claims about answered prayers as Armstrongites can and many times offer better proof than a COG member can.
What does the Bible teach about prayer? There are five basic types of prayer in the Bible that have meaning for people, whether done corporately as a church or individually. These simple types of prayer are: intercession, petition, penitence, adoration, and thanksgivings. 


Can what you do or do not wear be a factor? This is absolute useless bullshit to believe that God only hears your prayer when you are dressed in a suit or dress. God forbid if you were in a pair of swim trunks at the beach and gave a short prayer of thanks for a glorious day and for the beautiful creation you are surrounded by. God apparently plugs his ears in those circumstances. Besides that, what about the thief on the cross next to Jesus who was covered in blood, oozing wounds, wrapped in a dirty loin cloth or even naked, covered in piss and shit as his body reacts to multiple blows. Does Gods ignore him? Jesus sure didn't. "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom. Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”  Luke 23:39-43"
How can your prayers be more effective? 
Why doesn’t God seem to answer all prayers? 


How should you deal with the difficult? 
How should you deal with ‘the impossible’? 
Here is a listing of the 28 tips that Dr. Thiel goes over in this sermon: 
1. Pray to God the Father or Jesus as the thief did or even to the Holy Spirit for guidance.


2. Worship God in Truth  Which truth? Thielism? Armstrongism? Flurryism?
3. Believe God 
4. Obey God: Do More than the Demons In Armstrongism far too many act more like demons than they do as followers of Christ.


5. Worship God in Spirit All prayers from humans come from the heart, are sincere and/or are motivated by love for God and all that he has done. This is a weapon COG leader use to keep people scared that they aren't praying to God right.
6. Resist Satan  Unless one is praying deliberately to Satan then prayers ascending from God followers are resisting Satan. COG members need to stop fearing Satan and the power COG leaders have given him over members lives.
7. Don’t Fight God 
8. Pray for Others 
9. Pray for Your Needs 


10. Remember God’s Will and Have Your Priorities in Order 
11. Praying Positions from the Bible  Sitting, kneeling, standing, running, laying on your back in bed or under the stars...the positions are endless. Don't swallow the claptrap of so-called COG leaders.
12. Pray Every Day While this may be the desired amount, most never do it. Don't beat yourself up if it's every other day or maybe weeks at a time. Sometimes people just need to step back from all the rigamarole COG leaders have placed upon them and recenter themselves.
13. Forgiveness 
14. Recognize God’s Spirit 
15. Pray for What the Bible Says to Pray For 


16. Ask for Spiritual Gifts 
17. Don’t Pray for Show  Tell this to any any man standing in services for the opening and closing prayer. Far too many times these tend to be a slobberfest of adoration for the preacher.
18. Obey the New Testament About Head Coverings This is more claptrap that Armstrongites love to say is required. If it works for you then great, but certainly is NOT a requirement. If you say it is then you cannot sit there in condemnation for those in certain Christian churches, Islam, Amish, and other faiths who use head coverings.
19. Ask Often, Do Not Use Vain Repetitions, But Be Fervent 
20. If You Are Suffering or Sick, Pray About It 
21. Pray for Church Leaders 


22. Pray for Secular Leaders 
23. Put Jesus in Your Prayers 
24. The Difficult: Remember Fasting  While fasting may be beneficial to some it is not and never was a New Covenant command.
25. Pray With Thanksgiving 
26. Deal With ‘Secret Sins’ 


27. Change Can Make the Impossible, Possible 
28. Close with Amen.

Sometimes the most effective prayer a person can utter is just one simple word, Thanks!,  Wow!, or WTF!

Some of the best prayers a person can utter are when they are angry with God, pissed off, or in utter despair. Saying WTF God? is a far more genuine utterance that is heard by God than all the platitudes that so many COG men click off from the checklist in church prayers or even from Bob's silly list above.

Prayer should always be what is right for you and never what some so-called self-appointed church leader says you should be doing. Sitting on the porch with a cup of coffee in hand and praying will be far more beneficial than being locked in some prayer closet, on your knees for a strict one hour, and with a written list of prayers in front of you.

Holy God, your knowledge of me exceeds what I grasp or see in any moment; you know me better than I know myself. Now, help me to trust in your mercy, to see myself in the light of your holiness, and grant me the grace that I may have true contrition, make an honest confession, and find in you forgiveness and perfect remission. Amen.

O Lord support us all the day long, until the shadows lengthen and the evening come, and the busy world is hushed, and the fever of life is over, and our work is done. Then, in thy mercy, grant us a safe lodging, and a holy rest, and peace at the last. Amen 

As Long as We're at It....Dave the Wonder Worker


How much ignorance about basic science and simple reading comprehension can Dave pack into about a minute and a half?


Listen and weep laugh at the sheer ignorance.

Courtesy of COG Critic