Saturday, December 10, 2022

"Armstrongism is inoculated with just enough Christianity that it builds their immunity up to resist real Christianity when they get exposed to it. "


One of the longest-running posts here about the absurdities of Jon Brisby, the "leader" of the Church of God, The Eternal, now has 2018 comments. Sometimes it is filled with wild and outlandish comments in the midst of some truly troubling ones. Brisby is just like all other men leading COGs today who feel their self-importance makes them the most valuable leader the church has ever had. 

Today, a comment was made that describes perfectly the entire problem with Armstrongism and why it has been such a failure.

Herbert's Doctor said...

Armstrongism is inoculated with just enough Christianity that it builds their immunity up to resist real Christianity when they get exposed to it. 

When those entrenched in Armstrongism are exposed to basic Christian beliefs that are universally understood, many react with anger and with great gnashing of teeth. The basic beliefs of grace, justification, and sanctification are like dropping an atomic bomb in the midst of some COG groups. Their minds explode with a lot of "buts". In the Church of God, "buts" are always the most powerful decider of doctrine in the church. 

Condemnation is the word of the day in most COG's and they thrive upon it in their sermons, magazines, and broadcasts. Most of that condemnation is geared toward the world, but much of the time members are also weighed down by condemnation. 



Friday, December 9, 2022

Dave Pack = Mr. Kranky Kislev After 2 More Disappointments This Week


Mr. Kranky Kislev


Will you remember where you were and what you did on December 9, 2022, at 9:35 AM EST?


I will look back on this day and reflect on how simple life was when I was making my morning coffee. I had just poured the half-and-half into my mug and was about to put the carton back into the fridge when, in a perfect coincidence, I looked at the kitchen clock.


Surprisingly, my stove screamed at me—9:35 in the morning! No, it did not give me an utterance like John the Baptist had, but it felt like it did. Today is a big, big deal for the brethren of The Restored Church of God. Another prophetic rollercoaster comes to a stop. Or maybe, just a pause.


9:35 AM EST equals 4:35 PM Jerusalem sunset, which begins Kislev 16 on the Hebrew calendar.


This is when the 1335 of Daniel 12:12 begins. Or, shoulda.


This is when the faith of those in The Restored Church of God are rewarded. Or, woulda.


This is when God makes the world know that David C. Pack is not a biblical hack and prophetic kook. Or coulda.


The start of Kislev 16 is the exact beginning of a 15-day count to Christmas Eve when Jesus Christ returns to earth, bringing salvation to all the good little boys and girls inside RCG. That is December 24, 2022, at 9:35 AM EST if you want to mark your calendar.


Since nothing happened at 9:35 AM EST this morning, David C. Pack is stuck with titles like Biblical Hack and Prophetic Kook. For the time being.


The brethren of RCG have to remain in a disappointed state. For the time being.


The hirelings at Headquarters have to bone up on their Damage Control skills. For the time being.


The no-show today was preceded by Elijah not being raised this week to speak to the world, starting in Jerusalem. That was supposed to occur between Sunday morning and Wednesday morning. As it stands now, David C. Pack is not Elijah the Prophet and is not Joshua, the High Priest.


Do not be surprised if Mr. Kranky Kislev is more pissy and whiny than he typically is.



On Wednesday night, as a non-prophetic fog settled on the Headquarters Campus, the blue glow of the projector screen in the Third Floor Executive Imaginarium was in full blaze. The Packian Triad of Fraud was frantically searching for a way to explain why nothing they see clearly in the scriptures ever comes to pass despite it being too easy to misunderstand.


Instead of realizing this:


“God is not with us. God is not guiding us. God is not revealing secret knowledge locked away since before the world began. God is not blessing The Restored Church of God. God is not driving ‘The Greatest Unending Story!’ Series. Mr. Pack does not know as much as he thinks he does. Mr. Pack will never get prophetic timing right. Mr. Pack is a false prophet. Mr. Pack is a false teacher and a false apostle destined to repeat a cycle of failure. Mr. Pack lies to the brethren. Mr. Pack lies to himself. The hirelings at Headquarters support a religious fraud. The hirelings at Headquarters are betraying the trust of the brethren. The brethren are willing captives paralyzed by fear as love waxes cold.”


They posted this in Member Services yesterday:


Prophecy Update – Thursday, December 8, 2022


At this point, it has become clear for various reasons that we just wait to the 1,335. We should not expect anything to happen before this! We are on the clock once we “touch the day” but still do not know the hour. I personally intend to watch all the way to the end of this day.


David C. Pack



This is a hybrid Pathetic Update combining two failures into one posting.


The first sentence acknowledges the failure of Elijah to be raised between Sunday and Wednesday, making an appearance on Good Morning America unnecessary. Dr. Ranney will have to leave his finely-crafted press release in the Draft folder.


“At this point, it has become clear for various reasons…”


The various reasons are open to interpretation but start with physical reality being acknowledged. It is clear due to the passage of time. Again, this is a hybrid Pathetic Update. They waited for one theory to fail before commenting but still managed to get ahead of the next one.


“I personally intend to watch…”


The last sentence declares how righteous Dave is despite what he taught about timing for the beginning of Kislev 16. By Thursday night, he was aware “nothin’ was gonna happen” Friday morning.


What does “watch” even mean? Is Dave parked in a chair at the window in the Third Floor North Tower to quietly stare all day? Does he have Fox News on every TV with enablers assigned to watch it?


How do you “watch” while you are working? I never understood what that meant except to have a “Christ could return today” thought in the back of my mind while enduring meetings and answering emails.


“…all the way to the end of the day.”


Dave was very specific about it happening at the exact second of sunset at the biblical beginning of a full day. He was very specific about this being based on Jerusalem time. But there appears to be wiggle room.



Based on history, this is how Dave and Company will play it out:


This watch will bleed into the Sabbath. Anticipate another update suggesting the timing could still happen at any point during Kislev 16.


When that fails to manifest, then all 15 days before Christmas will be a time to continue watching because it has to be this year and the Kingdom of God / Day of the Lord has to begin on Tevet 1, which falls on a Christmas that falls on the first day of the week. (Recall the greasy, slimy 76-year lie told by a mathematical moron.)


“Do not be discouraged, brethren. All is well, and the prophetic picture is correct and complete. We have the right month! Everything is right on track, but there are too many proofs to explain now. All the ministers are amazed at what we missed.


Next week, Part 409 will explain to close out the series. Christ could not possibly come until the church understood this. Keep watching!”



It is scary crazy how I can channel the RCG nonsense.


Much like when Dave was Weeping for Tammuz when that did not pan out, expect another 15 days of Mr. Kranky Kislev to spin this little piggy all the way home to the ungrateful, sullen faces of The Restored Church of God.


The real question is how long until he gives Christmas back over to Krampus and moves on to the next fixation. My guess is that Janus will be back in play. And not The One Who Is Chandler’s Girlfriend.

Marc Cebrian

See: Mr. Kranky Kislev

Thursday, December 8, 2022

Church of God Anglo-Israelism ISN'T A Harmless Belief!


Anglo-Israelism ISN'T A Harmless Belief!

When confronted with the fact that Anglo-Israelism has been thoroughly discredited, I've heard numerous Armstrongites over the years justify its continued toleration among them by declaring "Oh well, it's not a matter of salvation anyway!" Now, while this statement is certainly true, it leaves one with the distinct impression that we shouldn't get our panties in a bunch over someone's acceptance of the teaching. Is that, however, the correct way for us to treat this heretical belief? Should we simply shrug our shoulders and walk away? In the final analysis, is Anglo-Israelism a harmless delusion?

From the title which I have chosen for this post, you already know my answer to that question! You, however, may still be wondering why I'm so interested in labeling this belief as harmful. In other words, what is/are my reason(s) for singling out this doctrine as being detrimental to Christians?

In enumerating my justifications for designating this teaching as harmful, I think it is important to begin with what this doctrine does to the way that we perceive Almighty God. In short, Anglo-Israelism distorts our view of God. The teaching portrays God as hiding the identity of his people from the world. In other words, according to this doctrine, God has intentionally deceived both his own people and the other peoples of the world about the "true" identity of the children of Israel! Hence, we can see that this doctrine implies that God is a controlling, interventionist, manipulative, secretive, and deceptive entity. Is such a view of God consistent with what is revealed about him in Scripture? I don't think so.

In similar fashion, this pernicious teaching distorts one's understanding of a number of other very important areas of the Christian faith. For instance, Anglo-Israelism engenders in its adherents a false sense of their own spiritual understanding and status as a Christian. Many of the folks who hold this belief feel like they're in on God's secret - that they have an inside edge on other folks. Indeed, many of them believe that their understanding of the identity of modern Israel is one of the very things which identifies them as a Christian!

Along the same lines, we should point out that this teaching distorts one's understanding of biblical prophecy. The identification of the English-speaking peoples of the earth as the modern-day descendants of Israel causes these folks to misapply all of the prophecies that were directed at ancient Israel! In other words, this teaching causes these folks to misapply God's messages to Israel through Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Hosea, etc. to the peoples of the United States and British Commonwealth. Hence, the entire premise of their interpretation of biblical prophecy is flawed and leads them to erroneous conclusions about what the Bible predicts for both our own time and the future!

It should also be pointed out that this distortion of prophetic understanding has led to the distortion of their understanding of the Christian message! Instead of a message focused on Christ and salvation through him, these folks are focused on a warning message for the English-speaking peoples of the world! Instead of fulfilling the Great Commission which Christ gave to his Church before his ascension into heaven, they are busily occupying their time and energy by being the "watchman" of Israel! If that doesn't qualify as a serious distortion of God's intention and will, I don't know what does!

In the same vein, Anglo-Israelism also distorts and devalues the universal nature of Christianity. What? You remember what Paul wrote to the Galatians and Colossians don't you? He told them that there is neither Jew nor Greek in the Christian faith - that we are all ONE in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28 and Colossians 3:11). Moreover, in the Gospel of Matthew, we are informed that Christ instructed his disciples to "teach ALL nations," NOT just the Israelite ones! (28:19) Likewise, this Israel-centric approach distorts and devalues Christ's role in bringing salvation to all of humankind and reigning as the universal ruler of the Kingdom of God!

Finally, Anglo-Israelism distorts a number of other understandings that are very important to the way someone who professes to be a follower of Jesus Christ should view the world. This teaching distorts a Christian's understanding of race/ethnicity. Instead of seeing humankind as being of one blood, it reinforces the view that God has intentionally favored one people over all others - that the advantages enjoyed by the English-speaking peoples of the earth were God ordained! This has, in turn, led to a sense of superiority - a sense of being exceptional among all of the peoples of the earth. In similar fashion, this has distorted the perceptions of many adherents of Anglo-Israelism regarding history more generally speaking - both their own history and those of the other peoples of the earth. Moreover, this pernicious teaching has also made a significant contribution to the disdain that these folks have for science and human expertise. In short, the rejection of genetic, archaeological, and linguistic evidence which contradicts this teaching has further alienated these folks from reality and the ability to think logically.

Hence, we can see that Anglo-Israelism is NOT a harmless delusion! The spiritual consequences of adhering to this heretical teaching are serious and far-reaching. Thus, while it may be technically correct to say that this isn't a matter of salvation, it would be foolish to dismiss this as a "harmless" diversion.

Posted by Miller Jones/Lonnie C Hendrix

Wednesday, December 7, 2022

Dave Pack's Short Sweet Birthday Treat


La Petite Mort


David C. Pack, the Pastor General of The Restored Church of God, was born on December 7, 1948. His birthday is today as he turns 74. For someone who teaches that celebrating a birthday is evil, he has sure mentioned it enough during his sermons that even I remembered it.


The birthday present he was hoping for (despite saying he did not want it) was that God was going to give him an utterance like John the Baptist, raise him as Elijah the Prophet, and send him to Jerusalem, where he would begin to speak to the world as a herald for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.


As it turns out…not so much.


He spent 66 minutes preaching about himself during “The Greatest Unending Story (Part 408)” on December 3, 2022. What his role is. What God would do with him. Where he is in the Bible. But he also gave a timetable for when this will all go down.


@ 1:05:28 There are days of this man’s voice. This period, if it is this week, and I’m understanding it correctly, the latest it could begin would be Wednesday morning.


The exact time of 9:35 AM EDT is based on sunset in Jerusalem, which is two days before the beginning of Kislev 16 this Friday. If that sounds complicated, it is. One of the significant challenges of my life has been to explain Dave's thinking in a way that is easy-to-follow and remotely understandable. Greater men than me have tried and failed.



Introduced for the first time four days ago, the public failure of Dave’s latest teaching could have been avoided if he had the self-control to shut his mouth and let God reveal the truth to the church. But, no. Dave, the Coffee Kid, and Pepper Boy "saw something" in the scriptures, and he had to rush to call it out without knowing what he was talking about.


Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.


He has a pathetic need to be the winner and to be right at all costs. He cannot allow God to do something only he knows about because his desire to claim the glory exposes deep-rooted insecurity, which has proven more challenging to mask as time goes on.


What is the point of winning a race if nobody knows you did?


@ 37:21 A picture’s gonna grow and grow and grow and grow and become what I’m pretty sure is impossible to misunderstand.


And yet, David C. Pack did misunderstand. When a human being tells you over and over how “easy” something is and still gets it wrong, that should be a warning sign to a rational mind. Staying inside The Restored Church of God despite nine years of documented failures is not rational.


The people inside RCG feel trapped because they do not know where else to go. When the building is on fire, maybe do not worry about what is on the other side of the window at the moment. Just get out.



La petite mort is French for “the little death.” Each time David C. Pack fails in front of the entire membership of The Restored Church of God, he dies inside a little bit. His mind and his heart have been dying in little bits over the past seven years. His deterioration is becoming more apparent, and the indications of his condition are harder to hide.


Hamburger goes bad when it turns gray. Once it stinks, it has to be taken to the dumpster. The teachings of David C. Pack need to be taken to the dumpster.


The Restored Church of God is spiritually rotting like spoiled meat. The stench fills the Hall of Administration with the most pungent concentration coming from the Third Floor Executive Imaginarium. The source of the stomach-turning reek is David C. Pack, assisted by two unwitting, inexperienced accomplices: James E. Habboush and Andrew J. Holcombe. The Packian Triad of Fraud.


To eat their spiritual meat is to make yourself ill. The spiritual food of The Restored Church of God is poison, causing la petite mort for the brethren. They know something is wrong but do not know what to do about it. If it were physical meat, the stench would tell them not to put it in their mouths. But since they are so used to it, the taste does not bother some anymore.


Stomach cramps and vomiting are just part of the Christian Walk now. They accept that a god tests them to see how much suffering they are willing to endure. The god Dave teaches is continually tricking them, but this is a trial of faith, so they must endure.


Just like the abused spouse determined to see how many beatings they can survive. The one they cannot comes too late to get away from.


The hireling enablers have embraced la petite mort by accepting willful blindness to the wickedness perpetrated by their human idol. What has died is their integrity. Even the iron that seared their consciences has grown cold. Just as brotherly love and godly love have waxed cold.



David C. Pack experiences la petite mort when he fails prophetically like he did this morning. He will fail again in a more grand way this Friday, December 9, at 9:35 AM EDT when Kislev 16 begins, but the 1335 of Daniel 12:12 does not. Salvation is not coming for those of The Restored Church of God on December 24 at sunset. It will be a Christmas to remember, but not the way Dave teaches.


@ 43:51 And frankly, based on all I’m gonna tell ya, I hope I’m wrong.


@ 1:04:01 I’ve never preached a sermon in my life with so many facts where I hoped every one of them is wrong.


@ 1:42:17 I hope I misread every verse and none of it happens…I hope everything here has another explanation.


Maybe Dave got his birthday wish after all.


The notes for Part 408 could have been left in his briefcase, and he would have been better off. Even Brad would have said, “Exercising wisdom was a good call, Mr. Pack. That would have been really embarrassing.”


Happy Birthday, Dave. Way to keep mucking things up.

Marc Cebrian

See: La Petite Mort

LCG: Unlike Other COG's And So-Called Christian Churches of The World We Are Growing And Bringing In Money!


One thing the church of God has always been good at, particularly regarding numbers pushing, is how well they could miniplate numbers to make them look better than they actually are.

Before the great apostasy of the mother church and the birthing of hundreds of harlot daughters, the accounting department manager admitted that they could take any number and make it look good and therefore beneficial as propaganda for the church.

With all of the splinter groups, it has been a numbers game from day one. Each has to be the biggest and best COG doing a work as the world has never seen. Just look at Bob Thiel's blustering about his group. No one in any COG has a one-eyed monster as sueprfantabulous as his. It's the biggest and bestest COG to ever exist in human history! No COG can ever compare to his nor can it ever do as big a work as he is.

That blustering, particularly by a heretical apostate of the Living Church of God has to frost their butts at times, which leads Weston and others to whip theirs out and claim they are bigger and better.

Dear Brethren, 
On November 12, 2021, the Wall Street Journal published an article titled “Churches Changed During the Pandemic and Many Aren’t Going Back.” The article discussed declining attendance in mainline churches. “The number of churchgoers has steadily dropped in the U.S.… Covid-19 and its lockdown restrictions accelerated that fall. In-person church attendance is roughly 30% to 50% lower than it was before the pandemic, estimates Barna Group, a research firm that studies faith in the U.S.” 
The article went on to say, “Barna Group’s research suggests that tens of thousands of churches are at risk of closing because of membership declines and other long-term problems that the pandemic made worse. A dip in tithes and offerings is forcing some to prepare for permanently smaller budgets, with less real estate, fewer staff members and smaller programs.” 
This is not the case everywhere—and we are happy to report that the Living Church of God has bucked the trend. God has blessed us with far more than mere survival. We continue to see the Work of the Church going forward at an increasing pace. One might have expected that finances would drop off with many out of work—preventing us from expanding—but just the oppositetranspired! Regular tithes and offerings increased, and special donations gave us a real boost. Instead of laying off employees, we took on several new ones, including ministers. We also increased the number of issues of Tomorrow’s World Magazine each year from six to ten, and our subscription list increased by more than 230,000 from January 2020 to January 2022! How encouraging it is that the Work shot forward with ever-greater impact during the last two pandemic-stricken years. 
This is good—no, wonderful—news. But the world around us has also changed dramatically in the last two years, and most of those changes are not so wonderful. Quite the contrary—our world, whether we look close to home or more broadly, is angry and fragmenting.

The only problem with all these COG groups is that when you get past all their blustering and chest-thumping, the vast majority of humanity has never heard of them. They have no real presence anywhere and the readership of their propaganda rags is minuscule. None of them have a real presence in their communities nor take part in their communities to the extent they let their lights shine magnificently. The COG has always been great at hiding their light under the bushel basket.

The only thing one needs to examine a COG group anymore is this:

PCG Celebrating It's 33rd Year Of Spiritual Depravity


No one would have ever dreamed 33 years ago how sick Gerald Flurry would become when it came to his teachings From forcing a father to throw his daughter out on the street so the state could take care of her to parents turning their backs on their children and children against their parents. No one would have ever dreamed he would set off for Oregon to dig up a dirty old rock that Herb supposedly prayed and drag it back to Edmond Oklahoma to enshrine on the cult compound where it is reverently displayed on a bed of royal purple velvet. No one would  imagine him  declaring his rock the new coronation stone and how he is now our King,

Tuesday, December 6, 2022

LCG: Modern Misguided Leaders In The World? What About In The Church, Too?

Doug Winnail was bemoaning misguided leadership in the nation last week, but I have to wonder if he is also bemoaning the misguided leadership of the LCG, also? 

Like many COG leaders, he has to look backward to search out events in the Bible that fit his modern world narrative. If he finds it, voila! Prophecy in action! Today's event is foretold in scripture!

If Winnail and other Christians who have faith in God, the Bible, and biblical values are firmly believed, no amount of questioning by atheists and agnostics would damage one's faith. In fact, being around an agnostic is usually far more enlightening when discussing the Bible because at least they admit they don't know, while the Bible believers think they know everything when in fact they know very little, too.

Where are there any "servants of God" in a Church of God who are "crying aloud" to the leaders and nations of the world?  Where are they? Even Bob Thiel is not doing such a thing, let alone Gerald Weston!  These guys envision themselves like Herbert Armstrong, and yet he never cried aloud to the world. He traipsed around talking about a "strong hand from someplace" and handed out expensive gifts attempting to buy favor. What witness has any of these nations ever received? How have any of them changed? Even Herbert's own church is a malignant cesspool of sin and corruption. NO COG out there is in any position to criticize the world around them when they are in far worse shape.

Yes, you HAD a job to do and have failed miserably!

Modern Misguided Leaders: Some of the strongest condemnations by Hebrew prophets were against the leaders of Israel “who destroy and scatter the sheep of My pasture” and “cause My people to err by their lies” (Jeremiah 23:1–2, 13, 32). Few today realize that these prophecies are dual, and that their ultimate fulfillment will impact modern Israelite nations and their leaders at the end of the age. It is no coincidence that today not only atheists and agnostics are attacking belief in God, the Bible, and biblical values that have been part of the foundation of Western civilization, but also liberal leaders in schools, churches, governments, and the media. As a result of the seeds sown by these attacks on fundamental biblical concepts and values and “forgetting our Maker” we are reaping the whirlwind of confusion, immorality, and social chaos that was prophesied long ago (Hosea 8:7, 14). This is why God has commissioned His modern-day servants to “Cry aloud” and warn our leaders and nations of the consequences that are coming, so they can heed the warnings and escape God’s punishments (Isaiah 58:1; Luke 21:36). We have a big job to do!
Have a profitable Sabbath,
Douglas S. Winnail

Monday, December 5, 2022

Dave Pack - A Self-Care Disaster


A Self-Care Disaster


The first time I heard the term “self-care,” I thought it was a clever euphemism for watching porn. Turns out, it is really a thing.


Some descriptions are pretty bloated, but a helpful definition is:


“the practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress.”


“The Greatest Unending Story! (Part 408)” given on December 3, 2022, could be known as David C. Pack's One Hour and Forty-Three Minutes of Self-Care. The majority of the message focuses on Dave’s favorite topic: Dave.


He is Elijah-Elect, after all, and is such a prominent Bible figure it would be impossible to end the Series without focusing on all the exciting stuff he is about to do. The way Dave tells it, every other minister inside The Restored Church of God will be sitting on their thumbs when God rocks the world in the coming days.


The brethren must be wondering about their role in this since God's message to God's people does not really involve them. Their job is to just sit and listen and buy it. As long as they paid their Common. 


But, maybe Jesus Christ will get to explain more to them when He comes back if hot-shot Elijah shuts his mouth long enough to let the Son of God have a word in edgewise.


Once Elijah takes the world stage, he will not be leaving. Even after the house lights come up.



Since the greasy, slimy math lie worked so well twice before, Dave decided to repeat it a third time so it could be a well-established unfact that shrivels for anyone who bothers to prove Mister Uncheckable.


@ 02:48 Now, we know that just to have a Christmas on Tevet 1, regardless of what day it is, it’s once in 76 years…I wonder if Tevet 1 ever occurs on a Sunday again. That is also Christmas. It could be centuries. I can only tell you that 46 years from today, in 2068, it's a Tuesday. So, that becomes its own, to me, fascinating point about how God timed this year. It would surely seem.


He again measures the time diameter and calls it a 76-year radius. It is still a lie. It occurs three times within 76 years.


If Dave had carefully read Brad’s summary of my article, he could have had Coffee Kid and Pepper Boy look up the Sunday aspect before he pranced to the lectern. But, preparation is not one of Dave’s strong suits.


Dave was piling on to his Christ-Coming-on-Christmas theory by stating how important it is for Tevet 1 to begin the new year on the first day of the week, a Sunday.


I did their work for them. The answer is the year 2174. That is the next time Tevet 1 falls on a Sunday Christmas. The current Restored Church of God thinking is that those parameters have to line up. If Jesus Christ does not appear in the next 21 days, He will not for another 152 years.


Do not hang your Santa hat on that. In 22 days, even Dave will abandon that “proof” like he will all the others.



Surprisingly, he refrained from making the message all about him until the 21-minute mark. Even these instances were only toe-dips into the self-serving pool he would later throw RCG into.


While covering Revelation 14:6, he had to compulsively speculate.


@ 21:09 “And I saw another angel fly in the midst of heaven, having the everlasting gospel to preach to them that dwell on the earth…” Now, that may be Elijah. Again. Probably is.


Dave being Elijah has become The Restored Church of God's biblical spackle. You have a church of about 1500 people, and every blank space in Dave's Bible has "Elijah" written in it. It could not possibly be Brad or Ed or Ryan or Jaco or Tim or Carl or Jim or Andy or Salasi or Frank or Raymond. We know it cannot be Ken or Deacon Snappy Fingers, but come on, Dave!


Seriously, there is nobody else it could possibly be?


The continuation into verse 7 suddenly has Dave walking back his statement from seconds ago.


@ 21:34 Now, that could be a different one later. Hard to say.


It further pains Dave to admit “another angel” in verse 8 may not also be him. Oh, the humility!


@ 21:51 And you could speculate that’s not Elijah. That’s just another angel, again saying…


In Revelation 14:14, Jesus Christ cannot be the one sitting on the clouds “like the Son of Man,” so Dave breaks out the speculation spackle because…why not?


@ 27:09 Maybe it's the Seventh Messenger. I'm not sure. Maybe it's the Seventh Angel if you wanna put it that way.


If he is not sure, then why even bring it up? Dave loves to have the preeminence. He loves to be on center stage. He loves being all throughout God's word. He cannot help but see himself in every nook and cranny of the Bible because he has been prepared his whole life, starting when he began to doodie in the toilet, not in his pants.


The pointless speculation serves no one in The Restored Church of God except David C. Pack. He is the only beneficiary of such imaginative preaching.


If you ever read Amos 3:7 and thought it was God explaining the concept behind the entire Bible and not only about David C. Pack, then you never truly understood it.


Amos 3:7

Surely the Lord GOD will do nothing, but He reveals His secret to His servants the prophets.


Dave seems to forget that it is a plural statement. Over the years, he often repeats that as to why he was chosen to give the Series. God is revealing His secrets to Dave, a prophet.


If that was indeed the case, why is it so hard? Why has Dave been 100% wrong 100% of the time?


Nevertheless, Dave cites Amos 3:7 and then ponders a big question.


@ 35:41 Would God bring 100 to 200 billion people five and a half days away, and nobody ever says anything to anybody other than in this room or who are listening in or who will catch up on other languages? That’s a giant question. That’s a giant question. No one foretells what is called The Kingdom of God? Really?


Dave hints that the “days of his voice” are much bigger than just “The Greatest Unending Story!” Series.



The Elijah Show begins, and for the next 66 minutes, it is a solid Elijah-Fest where he focuses solely on his role. Let me repeat. He spends over one hour talking only about himself. Why he does not just preach to a mirror is one of the great mysteries of our time.


@ 37:21 A picture’s gonna grow and grow and grow and grow and become what I’m pretty sure is impossible to misunderstand.


These are the things he covers in Part 408.


Dave is the sower who went out to sow in Matthew 13, Mark 4, and Luke 8.


Dave is the Elijah who must first come and restore all things in Matthew 17.


Dave is like John the Baptist, who will be raised by God with an utterance.


Dave is an apostle, which makes him more than a prophet because he is also a Levite.


Dave is raised as That Prophet.


Dave is “My servant David” in Psalm 89.


Dave is anointed as Joshua the High Priest in Zechariah 3 even though he is not yet a High Priest but will be before Friday.


Dave is the rod out of the stem of Jesse of Isaiah 11:1.


Dave is the one the spirit of the Lord rests upon in Isaiah 11:2, :4, :5.


Dave is the mighty and strong one of Isaiah 28:2.


Dave is the righteous man from the east of Isaiah 41:2.


Dave is raised up from the north in Isaiah 41:25.


Dave will bring good tidings to Jerusalem in Isaiah 41:27.


Dave is the Watchman of Ezekiel 3:17.


Dave is the plant of renown in Ezekiel 34:29.


Dave is three different messengers in one: Haggai 1, Revelation 10:7, and Malachi 3:1.


Dave finishes the Mystery of God in Revelation 10:7.



That is a tremendous amount of “Dave is” stuffed inside 66 minutes, though I am sure I missed some. That list is a summation of what transpires throughout the message to set up a new “big twist” Dave was selling.


Wait for it.


Look, Daddy. Teacher says, “Every time Dave sets a date, an angel gets his wings.”


An Elijah announcement period of no more than five days, but no less than two days, occurs before Friday, December 9. Each day is a countdown for David C. Pack to become a world figure.

@ 1:05:28 There are days of this man’s voice. This period, if it is this week, and I’m understanding it correctly,the latest it could begin would be Wednesday morning. If it’s right after the 12th [Kislev], then it would be Tuesday morning, and there'd be three days of his voice.


That is BIG NEWS, or he is wrong and will continue to linger in obscurity even though he has been crowned as the Chief Buffoon of the COG community.


So, rather than quietly letting that world-announcement period start which involves JUST HIM, and not forcing the members of The Restored Church of God to listen while he explains it, Dave just had to hold court "one last time" to make sure all the brethren knew how super-duper important he is to God.


The brethren inside RCG have been "watching and waiting" for so long, if something biblical did happen suddenly and they did not know about it…it would not have made any difference. It would be a relief for them. They were awaiting Jesus Christ any day, and their faith would have been rewarded before they expected, which would have fulfilled verses about not knowing the day and hour because BOOM, Mr. Pack is Elijah!!!


But instead of keeping it quiet and only telling those who need to know, Dave’s ego could not sit on this electrifying information without blabbing it to everyone. This will create a series of daily failures before the Super Mega Failure on Friday morning, December 9.



Here are a few notable quotes for those interested in reading his words. He sets up this period before Friday, and Elijah is the one to do it.


@ 43:31 We gotta whole lot more proving to do to see if we’ve got this right. I said we’d there'd be a twist. A huge wrinkle we never thought about because if this is true if what we're gonna read in diamonds, clubs, hearts, and spades is true, then something's gonna happen before Friday morning. But I don’t wanna declare that.


And yet, he goes on to declare it with caveats.


@ 1:05:49 It can't be more than five [days], and would it happen before all of the brethren hear it? Tomorrow at 9:30, it's five. Monday, it's four. Tuesday, it's three. Wednesday, it's two, and so forth. It can't go later than that unless, somehow, all of these are just the Kingdom of God and nothing, all the verses that suggest there's this man "rushing to call it out," the vision. And we're waiting for it, but he's just me calling it out to you in this room.


The “I’m three messengers in one” statement can be watched here.



He spends an exhaustive amount of time over-explaining "teleo," meaning "finished." Then, something about 21 days becomes a big sign that this Elijah pre-period is a real thing. Bla Bla Bla.


One unique angle to this message is how hard he hammers the "aw shucks, I don't wanna do this, but I gotta" story. It had to be someone. Someone God raises up with stellar abilities and intellect. Someone who doodies in the toilet, not in their pants. Unfortunately for him, that somebody is David C. Pack.


@ 43:51 And frankly, based on all I’m gonna tell ya, I hope I’m wrong. I hope we’re all waiting for Friday. But I have to be honest if I’m gonna be a wise and faithful servant. I have to tell you all that I found, and it’s simply staggering…I'm seeing things, whether it's the Book of Revelation or Isaiah or Nahum or wherever else you wanna go, things that I never saw before. And it's just like God is just clearing it up.


@ 1:04:01 I’ve never preached a sermon in my life with so many facts where I hoped every one of them is wrong. Nobody would want this assignment. I’m honored if this is what God wants. Somebody’s gonna do it. And his first name appears to be David.


@ 1:41:52 Whatever I envisioned, and I looked at these verses for years of my life, and intensively for the past seven years, it was never what I envisioned, was never that one man would go into Jerusalem alone for days without salvation and face the most horrific generation the world has ever seen. I hope it’s two days. I hope I misread every verse, and none of it happens, and we all comfortably wait for Friday. That's what I hope. But I just can't make the scriptures sing in that kind of harmony. They just don't. I hope everything here has another explanation. But I just don't think so.


@ 1:12:29 Don’t envy this man. Anybody who does? I’m gonna petition God, “You can do it. And I’ll stay back and fear not. And pray for you.” ‘Cause I need prayers. Because you say, “Well, I don’t know. Maybe it’s not you.” Well, then it’s some other David who’s a Seventh Messenger in a world that looks kinda like this one. And I wish there were another person.


He offers you the last slice of pie, hoping you pass it up. But then explains why he has to be the one to eat it. He does not want it to be him but explains why it has to be him. Aw shucks.


Trust me, he WANTS it to be him. It will crush him when it is someone else.



Dave already failed this morning. He will fail tomorrow morning. Then, Tuesday morning and again Wednesday morning. This will prepare all RCG for a more significant failure on Friday morning, which perfectly tees up the inevitable failure on December 25.


Do you think the Series is over?


@ 1:11:59 “Prepares the way” of what? Tells a small church they’re gonna go first? Okay, well, I’m done with that as of today. And, I mean, I think 408 sermons and, you know, 46,000 minutes and seven-plus years is enough.But we're just not quite to Friday yet.


@ 00:17 I guess this is Part 408. And by now, everybody knows with a roughly five and a half days to go, we’re not gonna have a 409.


Part 409 is a certainty. Just as the continual failure of RCG is a certainty.


Despite the David C. Pack Self-Care Disaster, nobody will enjoy well-being and happiness inside The Restored Church of God any time soon.


It will be a bummer of a Friday night this week. The new hymnal on the Sabbath will not be fully enjoyed because folks will continue to quietly ponder why the heckfire they are still attending.


The brethren of RCG need to practice self-care and flee from a false prophet. A man who lies to them and to himself. They need to escape from hirelings that care not for the sheep but feed off of them.


Do not believe a man, but believe your Bible. The screaming in your gut is not lying to you. Get out while you still can.

Marc Cebrian

See: A Self-Care Disaster

Sunday, December 4, 2022

UCG Rick Shabi: Are the righteous garments he wants members to be wearing nothing more than filthy rags?


United Church of God has been on a roll lately preaching to their followers about the right kind of "garments" they should be wearing.

Over the last few Sabbaths in the Home Office/Cincinnati East church there have been sermons given on “garments” Christians should wear. Among them are the garments of praise, joy and a cloak of zeal for God’s work. You might want to take the time to listen to them if you would like to build these traits back into your life.

If they actually preached about the One they claim to follow they would automatically have those traits and not need to be reminded of them continually, but that is another story. Of course, as with all COG's everything that happens in the church and with the members has to point to one thing, ZEAL for the work.

When "zeal" is lacking in the membership, income drops and the elite suffer. That's the real goal for maintaining zeal in the church.

How can UCG members be filled with joy and praise when they never hear much about that inconvenient dude they call Christ other than he preached about some kingdom to come. In COG speak, that kingdom and the meaning of justification, sanctification, and grace, never the twain shall meet. The emphasis is placed upon a mythical kingdom where everyone sits around on thrones of power singing Dwight Armstrong hymns as they weld superiority as a living god over the lazy Laodiceans at their feet. Of course, in COGland this is an endless thankless task of continual work that exhaust members to the point their zeal quickly disappears.

Coming off the Thanksgiving season, Shabi and UCG are focused on "thankfulness", a garment that all members should be wearing. When they leave that garment in the closet they become unthankful and Satan has a toehold on their lives and the church suffers. It's always the member's fault, remember?

There are fundamental attitudes we must develop and that we must “wear” in our lives. At the root of rebellion, sin, disregard and disrespect for God and His way is a lack of thankfulness. Of Satan, God says, “You were the anointed cherub who covers; I established you” (Ezekiel 28:14, emphasis added).

What about the root of rebellion that the top leaders of UCG/COGWA were consumed with when they plotted and schemed while on the Worldwide Church of God payroll to hijack as much money and members as they could when they started UCG? What about the rebellious sin in all of that? Was it a salvational issue for the souls of potential UCG members or really about keeping the money stream going for the elite of the church who claimed to be god-fearing ministers?

Shabi continues:

At the core of what we do, we are reminded that we are God’s Church and that we are committed to the truth of God. We must speak it, but as importantly (if not more so), we must live it and demonstrate it in our lives. Christ made the foundational statement that He is “the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). 

Jesus did make that statement, but it does not mean the ministry of the UCG believes it. Look at how many sermons are preached, articles written and Bible Studies given on keeping the law as compared to sermons, articles, and Bible Studies on grace, justification, sanctification, and even redemption. And they knew him not.

As part of His body, all of us must be dedicated to living, becoming and speaking the pure, plain truth taught by Christ and preserved for us in His Word. “Your word is truth” (John 17:17). 

And yet, do they REALLY follow it? Can they ever do anything without dragging the law into it? 

That we will do, as we follow Jesus Christ, the Head of this Church, and seek His will and guidance in all we do.

If only! 

Part 408: Here Dave, Let Me Write the Intro for That One


I don't think I have ever quite given a sermon like this...No, I never have...

 "I want to make a statement, 

I have indeed become deceived; I really need to share with you and tell you what I'm going to tell you now...

I am confessing that I have indeed gone off into strange ideas, misconduct, rebellion, you name it, and while I asked you to follow me, please don't. I am deeply sorry for the confusion and bad theology, strange and crazy ideas and mistaken notions about myself I have heaped upon us all lo these past years. 

 I want to tell you that now, because I did all that and have made every effort to get you all to follow me. Indeed, I did come to you and tell you it doesn't apply, it doesn't mean me, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's OK to follow me because ABCD and XY and Z. Do you understand what I'm saying?  I am deeply sorry for doing exactly what I promised you all I would never do. I tend to do that. I recognize it and I need and want you all to forgive me. 

 Listen to me now, please when I tell you don't follow me because, admittedly, I did go off into weird ideas and badly parsed scriptural fairytales.  I did get off into other things that are total and absolutely unscriptural conduct, and I did paint it with a different face and try to get you to follow me. Do you understand what I'm saying brethren?  I am deeply sorry for all this mess I have created and pain in the lives of all of you and those good folk who have left us. 

Please remember that, because I promise you that I see my mistakes and self-absorbed folly. I did become deceived, I did, of course, want you all forget it and not notice.  Marc, Dennis and many others of you did remember it well enough to quote it right back to me... and I thank them and am deeply sorry. If you need me to step down and go somewhere else, I will.


David C Pack
Probably Never and Only in Everyone's Dreams