Saturday, February 9, 2019

Bob Thiel Answers The Question: Did Edgar Cayce Marry Lilith Before He Dropped His Tithe Off At The Kosher Voting Place Next To The Acting Studio?

It is another fun-filled weekend in Arroyo Grande, home of the improperly named "continuing church of god" and its Chief Overseer and Grand Bawana, Bob Thiel.  He just released his latest information-overload video sermon for this most sacred of Sabbath days.  Does he honestly think any of his African followers care one bit about the majority of these topics?  Instead of sticking to a single point and preaching a well-researched sermon of 20 minutes, he has to spend over an hour and twenty minutes discussing the following topics:

Is studying acting acceptable for Christians?
Will animals, like wolves and lions, remain carnivores?
Does Ezekiel 13 warn against false prophets?
Should you be baptized for the dead?
What are Bible marginal references?
Should you follow people like Edgar Cayce?
How do you calculate a tithe?
What is second tithe?
What is third tithe?
What is the ‘tithe of the tithe’?
When do you start a third tithe year?
Did Adam first marry Lilith?
What are the fasts of Zechariah 8:19?
How is God jealous in Exodus 20:5?
Can women hold outside jobs?
What is kosher?
Would Jesus vote?
Should Christians vote?
Dr. Thiel goes through scriptures, facts, COG documents, and historical information to provide answers.

It's Not a Question of Love...It is a Question of Common Sense and Wisdom

Vaccine controversies are public debates around the medical, ethical and legal issues related to vaccines. These controversies have occurred since almost 80 years before the terms vaccine and vaccination were introduced.

Here in the Pacific North West, both in Vancouver and now in Portland,  a Measles outbreak has occurred of late. There have been 50 confirmed cases and more suspected. The PNW is also a center for anti-vax parents who, for many reasons, refuse to vaccinate their children against the common or now mostly not common at all childhood diseases. 
2019 Portland, Oregon
(Personal note: In spite of WCG sentiments on immunizations, I personally took responsibility for the immunizations of my two children in the 1970's and had them vaccinated according to schedule.  When members asked for the exemption forms I always asked them if this was their own conscious decision or were they feeling they had to not vaccinate due to church "teachings"?  Some asked if I "minded" if they went ahead with getting their children immunized and always told them that was their decision and had nothing to do with me (or the church in reality). On the entire topic of doctors and medicine, I always encouraged, in some cases begged, members to get to their doctor and hospital if need be. I'd anoint them there and later and especially quickly if it involved their children. My lifelong "ministerial" view was that while an adult can make any faith filled  medical decision they wish FOR THEMSELVES, they should not make those kinds of decisions or exhibit their own faith FOR THEIR CHILDREN.  I only mention this so those who would like to criticize me for my past coming this conclusion NOW will understand it has ALWAYS been my conclusion and I lived it with my own family and congregations from the start. As is the custom of some, their projections of their own experiences on to myself would be mistaken)

Because of this rare but aggressive outbreak of Measles here in the PNW the controversy about not only parents withholding vaccinations because of religious beliefs but also for the belief, real or imagined of the dangers of doing so has erupted afresh. 

On top of that there is a new phenomenon now of children old enough to think it through up through teens  getting vaccinated on their own without parental permission or even knowledge of doing so. The availability of information both pro and con is much more available to children and teens now through their own devices than anything we, as children, ever had access to. Some adults  whose parents, when  young who also withheld vaccinations, are also leaving the guilt,  lack of information or choice their parents enforced on them and getting themselves vaccinated as advised.

Parents and adults can live their adult faith for themselves however that expresses itself.
Whether it be immunizations or medical care, no parent has the right to inflict their faith, as if it were also a child's faith, in such matters. With proper medical and doctor advice and counsel, this should not be the problem some few parents, both in a religious context and the ever present conspiratorial context make it out to be. 

If a parent has the faith, for the child,  to not protect their child with vaccinations, perhaps they could have the faith to protect them with them?
After all, how many times has one said "And bless and cleanse this food to the nourishment of our bodies"

Proverbs 17:22
If a merry heart makes GOOD like a MEDICINE, perhaps the Bible at least admitted to the benefit of MEDICINE long before WCG came along
Just sayin'

Anti Vax Parents Looking To Sue Anybody They Can After Teen Daughter Gets Herself Vaccinated vaccine needle with medicine bottle 280x185 jpgWhen I was a teenager, I spent all my babysitting money on vintage clothes, Manic Panic, and clove cigarettes. I thought I was so cool, but I was nowhere near as cool as the Ontario teen who took her health into her own hands and went and got herself vaccinated against the wishes of her anti-vaxxer parents.

Her mother, of course, was furious, and turned to Reddit’s /r/legaladvice forum to ask whom she was allowed to sue about this. She wrote:

None of my children are vaccinated. Totally by accident I came to find out that my oldest daughter has been fully vaccinated (Tetanus, diphtheria, pertussis, polio, measles, mumps, rubella, hep a and b, menengitis a and b and hpv) without mine or my husband’s knowledge or consent. In Ontario we have socialized medicine and publicly funded vaccines. She admitted she went to clinics run for school aged children run by our local health public health unit to get her shots and also got a few at a local walk in clinic that are not yet publicly funded paid for with her babysitting money. When I called public health and the clinic to complain they both said that because she is age 16 they cannot release any information to me – and I’m her mother! My husband and are livid that she was vaccinated without our consent. What kind of action can we take against public health and the clinic for vaccinating a child without parental consent? Do we have a case for a lawsuit?

Reddit, of course, enjoyed a delightful summer shower in anti-vaxxer tears over this post, because the poster’s teenage daughter is smart and awesome and deserves a high-five for taking her health into her own hands. Also Ontario deserves a high-five for its socialized medicine and publicly funded vaccines that allowed this 16-year-old to get up-to-date on all her vaccinations.

High-fives for everyone!

Dave Pack: As Elijah the Prophet I will have to deal with false prophets and strike them down

Poor Bob Thiel. Nothing he can do is ever right and now he has to worry about Dave Pack coming and striking him down with fire for being a false prophet. Imagine how humiliating it must be to be Thiel.  Having to submit to correction from Elijah the REAL Prophet, Dave Pack.  Poor little guy!  I guess those dreams did not work out so well!

Friday, February 8, 2019


The Terrible Track Record Of Sabbath Keeping

This is what James Malm and Bob Thiel continue to do to this day.  It is more important to be Pharisees than it is to follow the one they claim to follow.  It is the petty trivial things that are more important than ever being a Christ follower.

Thursday, February 7, 2019

A Response To The Commentator Who Dared Banned To Publish It.

This was not addressed to me, but to the Site owner, but I felt a response was warranted generally. Here's my personal response to a very direct comment with a very direct and pointed answer. 
I feel sorry for this site owner, wasting his life blaming God for men being men,
I feel sad for the commentator. This commentator - who seems to have the personality of, if not actually a minister - is accusing the site owner of Banned for "wasting his life". I assure you, the blog owner is an extremely busy, fulfilled, and active individual. Yet, the stronger accuser here is "blaming God for men being men". No one on this blog blames God for men being men. The days of "men being men" is over. There is no excuse for men acting in abusive, carnal, self-willed, greedy, vain, and arrogant attitudes and positions of self-proclaimed and wicked power and authority over the weak and the trusting. 
blaming Mr. HWA for what men have done to his legacy.
The only man who is responsible for the legacy of Herbert Armstrong is Herbert Armstrong. Herbert Armstrong left a very thorough, very detailed paper trail of his actions and attitudes that had spanned greater than 50 years. What was discovered in this paper trail has been confirmed and authenticated by close relatives, co-workers, members, and hundreds of people who worked with him - including the very blog owner himself, who actually worked in his house, saw his book collection, and saw all of herb's treasures. Through the years, the words of Herbert Armstrong have been weighed in the balance of truth, and have come out as falsehoods, distortions, and outright lies to the detriment of those who believed his words. The only man who made the legacy of HWA what it is, is HWA. 
No one forced anyone against their will to do anything. 
This is an absolute lie. Using fear as a tactic of power is force, even if it is not explicitly direct. Threatening someone's eternal life for failure to conform to a command or edict, or policy or directive, is indirect force by threat. It is telling a person that this will happen if you do not do this, or this will happen if you do this, claiming authority of either a physical or a spiritual entity. Using this tactic to achieve a goal - whether it's financial, whether it's moral, whether it's spiritual, whatever it is - is emotional and spiritual abuse. One may not attribute it to direct, physical force, but it is indirect, emotional abuse - and abuse is abuse, whether it is mental, emotional, or physical. The failure to take responsibility for abuse of power through spiritual extortion and threats is as directly harmful as if someone had physically committed assault and battery on a person. Every person who has directed a person to do something under supposed divine authority that has negatively impacted an individual through fear, intimidation, and deception of power has indirectly forced them to do whatever it is that they wished - and that is abuse, it is wrong, and it is evil. To say, again, that no one forced anyone against there will to do anything? An absolute lie of wickedness. 
Are you also blaming your Mum and Dad for having you? Nobody forced them to have you did they. Is your lack of Faith, understanding, discernment and lack of conversion and godless works due to non reverence and lack of godly fear now make you and expert on your so-called Armstrongism. Who hurt you so much that you ruin your life in this way; was it not you, yourself, for your choices that you had made that you now blame others for and have become an accuser of God because of your total ignorance of the things of God and human nature.
Non-reverence? Lack of godly fear? Lack of conversion? Because he is not submissive to abusive ministers? To liars? To greedy and power-hungry individuals? Total ignorance of the things of God? Do you know what you are saying? Have you taken the time or the responsibility to get to know this person you so arrogantly judge? Have you communicated with this person to know their innermost thoughts? Have you taken the time to understand this person inside and out? Have you traveled to see this person? to spend time with this person? To dine and to understand? To build a relationship with one you judge so arrogantly and pretentiously? You are so quick and forceful to judge! But is your only contact with this person keyboard to keyboard? Have you ever shook his hand? Been in the same living room? Enjoyed a one-on-one meaningful conversation? Do you know all of the experiences that this person has gone through in the decades of Armstrongism? Have you seen what he has seen? Have you heard what he has heard? Tell me, if you know! Do you know his personality? Have you even had one true period of counsel with this individual that entitles you to make a professional opinion? Surely you have the discernment to understand! What actual relationship do you have with this person whom you judge so haughtily to make such blasting judgements? Surely you have volumes upon volumes of information about every detail of his life! You care so very deeply that you have taken the time to know, to understand, to get to the very core of his mind! I am awed by how much time you have invested into this individual! Tell me how much you really know about this person, that you have been given the authority to judge. If you come up empty on any of these questions, then your words are haughty, empty and meaningless. 
Who told you, you were naked! Take note oh wise one, if you had lived in the NT era and all the Apostles had died and Christ had not yet returned, you would have done the same as you do now, for such is your character trait; accusatory, self righteous, carnal, bitter and obviously an ignoramus of the things of God,
Can you defend the accusations? Have you any evidence that exists to counter any of the detailed claims on this blog concerning the individuals involved in the Armstrong movement? What is your defense? Where is your rebuttal? Can you refute any of the stories that have been affirmed and written? Can you take any of the things that have been detailed here and smoke them out of existence by truth and evidence? If you can, show us! Give us your rebuttal! We're open, and listening! You call the site owner self-righteous. Really? Do you know about the word "righteousness" and what it means? Do you understand the difference between the works of righteousness and the works of wickedness? Anyone can claim to know the difference. Where is the evidence of the righteousness of Armstrongism without resorting to physical bias - like wealth and infrastructure and worldliness? Show us! Carnal? What's carnal? Is not greed, the love of money and the love of materialism carnal? Is not lust of mammon carnal? Is not theft of finances for physical gain carnal? Is not rage, temper, and malice carnal? How can one claim carnality when the very system is carnal to the core? Who are you to judge someone's emotional mindsets when the only contact you have had with a person is via keyboard? Who are you to label someone an ignoramus of the things of God if you don't even know a person? Surely you think so highly of yourself! Surely you are full of such stupendous, earth-shaking knowledge! Surely you know all things about him! Of course, you are basing all of this on how obedient or disobedient to the law as you define it! How very short-sighted and arrogant. 
having never been truly called of God, but a plant, fifth columnist, a sleeper agent of Satan having waited for the right time to be released to do your destructive work on the the True Church of God; not the cogs but the truly called out ones in whom dwells the Holy Spirit that are scattered in the winds of whom are only known by God Himself.
Who are you to judge if he has ever been truly called of God? Are you not familiar with the works of Jesus and what He accomplished on the Cross? Have you not read the scriptures at all? Or are you ignorant and looking at them through the bias of Armstrongism's distorted and false attempt at biblical interpretation? Who are you to judge the columns of banned as filth? Do you have evidence to discredit? Do you have evidence that the claims made at this site are incorrect? Have you ever taken the time to submit anything that proves any of the stories here are incorrect? Can you - or will you - refute what you claim as filth to be filth? Or are you in denial of what is obviously the truth? You claim the owner is an agent of Satan, doing destructive work on the True Church of God. Okay, the floor is yours. Show us your evidence. Give us the claims that what he is saying is incorrect. Prove that he is lying. Prove that his words are false. If you wish to come out with these claims, then pour out the evidence on the table. But be prepared, because the evidence will be read, and will be countered by every fact and proof available. Then, if you refuse to look and to listen, and see, it is not us at the site that has the problem. 
You demand perfection from everyone else except yourself, as you regard yourself the saviour of the dubbed, taking delight in those who you believe you liberated from bondage, and being energised by those who agree with you in tearing apart Mr. Armstrong and attacking fallible men. 
Your defend Herbert Armstrong. You say Herbert Armstrong is being "torn apart". Defend, then, the over 200 incorrect speculations and prophesies. Defend the rage. Defend the temper. Defend the no doctor doctrines that have harmed or caused death to many within the Church. Defend the financial improprieties. Defend the extravagance. Defend the scandals -every one of them. Defend the double-standards. Defend the theological ignorance. Defend against the stories of the victims, the hurt, the impoverished, and how all of these people were wrong. Defend the underground abuse within the Church enabled by Armstrong and the senior ministry. You say he is attacking "fallible men". Are you saying the ministry is shielded of "fallibility" for crimes? for abuse? for financial misconduct? Are you using "fallibility" as an excuse? 
Yes, I know individuals like you, and I know you, above all men to be pitied. I know also you will not post this comment, as others like you have not posted them, for you are all cowards. So, I dare you to post this comment if you are truly sincere. For I myself boast of my calling under Mr. HWA, through whom God dragged me out of the mire and has since been full of blessings in every way, with all goodness lacking nothing physically and spiritually as my family and I walk in the WAY of Christ, full of Faith, Hope, trust, patience and Love of God and all His ways and for His purpose and plan for the salvation of all humanity, starting with the first fruits, which you will obviously not be partaker of it. 
Well, he posted the comment. I'm responding to the comment, as a frequent contributor here, and one who has also spent decades in Armstrongism first hand. Instead of boasting of your calling under HWA, where is your boasting of Christ and Him Crucified? Why not follow the example of Paul? Why not then boast only of Christ? And since you claim to walk in the way of Christ, and are proudly full of faith, hope, trust, patience, and God's love, why then do you so suddenly condemn one man as an "obvious non-partaker" of Salvation? Do you not understand the depth of the grace and the love of God? Why are you boasting of yourself while condemning another? Are you so much better than he, or any who are not of your church? You boast of your blessings in every way, lacking nothing - but you are quick to judge, quick to condemn, full of pride and self-assurance. 

You say you are rich, and wealthy, and have need of nothing. May I remind you of Revelation 3:

14 “To the angel of the church in Laodicea write:
These are the words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God’s creation. 15 I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16 So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth. 17 You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. 18 I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see.
19 Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest and repent. 20 Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.
21 To the one who is victorious, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I was victorious and sat down with my Father on his throne. 22 Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

written by SHT

Adult Sabbath School: According to Ted, The Bamboozled , Bumbuzzled, Lazy and Uneducated Choose Science Over the Bible

That blade swings both ways...

Theistic evolution is an attempt to accommodate both the existence of a Creator-God Who made the universe and the interpretation of scientific evidence that claims the universe is billions of years old.

According to Ted...

It was either  Evolution OR Bible Literalism. You can't believe both.
(Which is true because much of NT Theology is based on OT myths)

When I was young, Garner Ted Armstrong was the smartest pencil in the box on just about everything in both theology AND REAL SCIENCE.

As the years went by, Ted never outgrew his views on anything. He never updated his information and he certainly never understood what paleontologists, geologist and cosmologists really understood back then much less what they do now.  

When Ted, and the Church of God,  was a child, he thought as a child, he researched as a child, he held on to myths and stories as a child, but when Ted was older, he did the same thing and never was able to put away childish beliefs based on out of date information. 

The Evolution of Whales is well understood today

The Church's Theory of the Birds was actually a Theory for the Birds.
Science now informs us that feathers came long before birds and that dinosaurs, which all modern birds are descendants of', were, in many cases feathered and evolved not for flight at all. Flight came later. 
Some dinosaur feathers may have been more fab than drab. Take this ostrich-size adult dinosaur called Ornithomimus edmontonicus, which would have been adorned with stringy down — filamentlike feathers up to 2 inches (5 centimeters) long. The sexually mature adult also had markings on its winglike forelimbs that suggest it bore longer feathers that were absent from the juveniles of the species that were also discovered. As such, the researchers think the feathers may have been used for courtship or brooding, much as male peacocks shake their striking feathers to woo females.

….a timeless life skill

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

LCG: We Have Prophetic Vision! Yep we do! We really really do!

If you thought the illogical sermons of Dreamy Chief Overseer Bob Thiel of the improperly named "continuing" Church of God were mind-numbingly boring,
wait until you catch some of this sad sermon on prophecy from LCG.
It will be hard to make it through the first 5 minutes!
I can just see LCG members starting to fall asleep when he starts speaking.

Church Administration in Pasadena found him incredibly boring and narcissistic before he apostatized and went with Rod Meredith. Yet, LCG continues to celebrate him as him as some kind celebrity.

Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Why Is The Lord God So Desperate That He Has To Reveal The End Times To So Many COG Leaders?

When reading various COG websites and blogs of the various wanna-be COG leaders and you stumble upon this bible quote, you quickly know things are going to go downhill, fast.
Matthew 24:36 But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only. 
And then every single one of them quote this next:
Amos 3:7 Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets.  
The first verse they ignore entirely and the second these wanna-be's use as proof of their apostle/prophetship.

These are the first two scriptures quoted by one of the lesser but more Pharisaical of the COG leaders of this age, Chief Pharisee James Malm.

He writes about himself as the final man who is set apart by God to reveal the "hidden things":
When Jesus walked the earth in the flesh he said that no man knew the day or the hour of his coming as King of kings. 
Nevertheless he did say that the Father knew and it is written:
Amos 3:7 Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets. 
After his resurrection these things were revealed to Jesus.  AFTER he had died and been resurrected and ascended to heaven, the Lamb of God was found worthy to unseal the hidden things of God the Father.  
Revelation 5:1 And I saw in the right hand of him that sat on the throne a book written within and on the backside, sealed with seven seals. 
No one in heaven or on the earth was able to open and understand the sealed books of scripture (Dan 12); until the Lamb of God was found worthy to unseal the hidden things of the plan of God. 
God promised in Daniel 12 that in the last days, Jesus Christ would reveal these things and that there would be a great increase of spiritual knowledge and understanding.   
These things of God were sealed and kept hidden until the Appointed Time of their revealing at the very last days; which is why there has been almost no understanding of the Biblical Festivals, Biblical Calendar and most of the end time prophecies until now.  
What is so very sad is that most of today’s Ekklesia reject the expansion of knowledge and understanding that God has promised to reveal in this end time. 
Daniel 12:9 And he said, Go thy way, Daniel: for the words are closed up and sealed till the time of the end. 
Brethren, that time has come!
Now in this end time Jesus Christ has been revealing these sealed hidden things to his servants in his promised surge of new knowledge and understanding for the end times. 
Who would have ever imagined that God needed some man parked at his kitchen table in the Pacific Northwest banging away on a computer keyboard as he reinterprets every single scripture in the Bible into what he wants it to mean?  The more legalistic and burdensome he can make things, the better.

Then we have Dave Pack, God's ONLY chosen and most superfantabulous man to ever be born in human history, declaring he is the end time prophet sent to prepare a place in Wadsworth, Ohio for his Christ to come back to and commune with Dave as IT prepares for IT's third coming. He has prophesied that four COG leaders would die and all of their members would join his amazing church.  Never happened and never will.

We also have Gerald Flurry adding his mentally disturbed reasoning into the mix.  He has declared himself the King of the Church of God and is in possession of the TRUE coronation stone that his Christ will come back and sit upon when IT is crowned king of kings either in Edmond, OK or in Edstone,  England. This will happen soon after he digs up Hill Tara in Ireland and uncovers the Ark of the Covenant that Jeremiah buried there.

And how could we forget Ron and Laura Wienland, God's TWO most amazing witless witnesses the world has ever seen!  Old Ronnie has the distinction of being the first COG felon to run a group. Even after suffering one of the most public humiliation ever imaginable in San Francisco in 2008 and his later imprisonment, the intrepid fool continues to declare one amazing prophecy after another, all of which fail in the most delightful ways.  Most here do not realize that he predicted WWIII would have begun by the beginning of this month. 

And then there is Bob Thiel. Oy vey!  Has the Church of God ever had a bigger liar than this man?  After his idol Rod Meredith publicly humiliated him several years ago, Thiel set out to start his own group by falsely claiming double blessings and various dreamy dreams to set himself up as the ONLY end time COG doing a true work. As he communes with his Catholic and Mayan dark spirits, he dreams up all kinds of idiotic nonsense that he tells his gullible followers in Africa is the truth. They, in turn, look at the Great Bawana as their hero as they back slap him and call him all kinds of fancy names while milking him dry in funds, seeds and computer equipment.

These guys are just the top few of the Armstrongite pyramid of lying fools that have set themselves up as the one and only true instrument God is supposedly working through today in 2019.

This, however, does not leave out the lesser men leading other COG's who preach their own unique version from the same doctrinal tree of Armstrongism. From Kubik, Weston, Franks, and the others, they too believe they are leading the one and only true end time work, though they don't fly off at the mouth with as many stupidities as the above-mentioned men do.  These guys want to be more accepted by the public as they pussyfoot around as little milquetoasts afraid to really expose to the world what nonsense they actually believe.

Does anyone today actually believe any of these men are the prophetic instruments of God and that He needs these kinds of morons to be his end time mouthpiece?  If asked in private, most COG members would deny the men leading them.  Deep down they know these men are liars but are too afraid of the god these men have created to actually speak out or leave their groups. 

Fear is the greatest motivator these men are all using. Fear of losing one's salvation for failing to heed the call these men all proclaim is used as a weapon to keep them in line and submissive.

Every single one of these fools has one objective in mind and that is for you to send them your money. From Pharisee Malm to milquetoast Kubik, money is their ticket into the kingdom. So open up your wallets and be saved! After all, God needs little weak insignificant men to do his work and the COG sure has its supply of them!

Dear Dave: Practice Makes Perfect

Greetings Dave

We understand that you will , no doubt, have a tremendous part in the rebuilding of The Third Temple, According to Ezekiel's Visions. Outstanding!  You also are hopeful that you will be asked about whether to start the animal sacrifices. We KNOW you will be consulted in these matters!  You go boy! 

The day will come when we can all say, "We knew him personally!"  

At any rate, we're going to ask that you at least practice a bit in building the Temple and suggest you invest in this excellent Third Temple Kit , complete with real Hebrew words on the box!  It will give you a sense of your growing power and influence in Israel right in the comfort of your own Religious Compound. With all your building experience to date, you can decide if you wish to alter the original design as in-visioned by Ezekiel. He won't care. He's dead!  The Rabbis in Jerusalem will love your ideas by then and will be hanging on every word you utter on all things prophetic and theological. I bet they come to rue the day they ever even bothered with their Rabbinic educations and wish to YHVH they had met you much sooner in their ignorant Jewish  lives. 

Cheaper than a plane ticket!

If need be and to get you ramped up, you can start by assembling Solomon's Temple or at least assign your Council of 16 the task to familiarize them with it and agree wholeheartedly with the changes you will no doubt seek their approval on coming soon Third Temple Once they approve as well it will be a piece of Unleavened Bread to sell your changes to the Rabbis of Jerusalem..  They have well advised  you with cautionary diligence in the past  and no doubt will not let you down now. 

As long as we're at it, there is an excellent Balsa Wood kit of the Ark of the Covenant that you can study for possible ideas should you wish to change anything with it. Even comes unpainted just for fun and you can add or delete commandments as you like on the blank Tablets provided!  

Once you get the hang of it you can upgrade to the Lego Model or give them as gifts to your Council of 16!

There is even a kit that teaches the consequences of opening the Ark without PERMISSION!

There are inexpensive ways for the Council to practice transport and hands off as well!

But again, we ask neither you nor any of the Council open it to look inside. Been there, Done that!

Personally, I suggest a Third Temple kick off party to keep it light hearted and able to win over the hearts and minds of the most gullible or skeptical of members who no doubt will be gyrating in their seats once they see all that you have predicted for yourself actually coming to pass. 

May I suggest Ark of the Covenant Rice Crispy Treats?

Remember, only hold them by the pretzel!

All the best! All Jerusalem awaits your coming!!!

But be careful...

The Jerusalem Syndrome is a term used to describe a mental phenomenon whereby visitors to Jerusalem develop religious delusions, believing that they may be God or a famous person from the Bible. Such individuals have believed themselves to be famous Biblical people such as John the Baptist, the Apostle Paul, the Virgin Mary, or even the Messiah. The syndrome only affects members of Judaism, Christianity and Islam, with Jews and Christians comprising the majority of cases. The theory was developed by Dr. Yair Bar-El, a former director of the Kfar Shaul Mental Health Center in Jerusalem, which has claimed to treat an average of one to two Jerusalem Syndrome patients per month. …..
There have, of course, been many cases in which patients developed Jerusalem Syndrome not because of an intense religious experience, but due to a preexisting mental disorder. One man who suffered from paranoid schizophrenia developed Jerusalem Syndrome while in the U.S., and traveled to Jerusalem as a result. He was an American bodybuilder who believed himself to be Samson, the Biblical strongman. He traveled to Jerusalem on a delusional holy mission to move part of the Western Wall. Some speculate that David Koresh, the fallen cult leader of the Branch Davidians, had a Messiah complex caused, in part, by a trip to Jerusalem.
While many in the medical community are skeptical of Jerusalem Syndrome's legitimacy, many take it seriously, nowhere more so than in Jerusalem. Tourist guides, security personnel and doctors in Jerusalem all keep a watch for the symptoms of Jerusalem Syndrome. Once a person suffering from symptoms has reached the stage of wrapping themselves in white bed sheets and proselytizing in the desert, many doctors are trained to play along with the delusions, so as not to further agitate the patient. With the help of time, medical care, and drugs, the delusion often wears off.
(Wise Geek)