Saturday, February 2, 2013

Prophet Thiel Again Speaks Out On Appropriate Males and Vile, Filthy, Satanic Football

Unacknowledged and ridiculed false prophet Robert Thiel has a new member letter up today to his minuscule flock.  It is amazing that he starts lying right off the bat in the very first paragraph.  I thought the leaders of the Church of God were to be above reproach?  Lying must be OK since every single leader out there has lied through their teeth over the years.

Anyway, he writes that he had 2,000,000 listeners to his program last week.  That is factually impossible.  All the unacknowledged prophet needs to do is do a Google search on how radio stations garner their statistics.

It has been an exciting week as statistics show that in our first thirty days, the Continuing Church of God was able to reach over 2,000,000 people over the radio and over 100,000 over the internet.

The largest radio stations here in Los Angeles with a listening audience from Santa Barbara to San Diego and from Santa Monica to Riverside cannot garner that many listeners to a station at one time.  They never have and never will, particularly if it is a talk radio show.  Thiel is a liar. 

The ignored prophet then goes on to whine about Congress pass a debt spending bill.  Congress committed a huge error in not listing to false prophet Thiel.  He says:

One item that you may wish to read, if you have not already done so, was the article titled Congress passes debt bill.  Ignoring the prophetic warnings about increasing debt, the Congress of the USA past legislation to increase federal debt.  

How dare Congress ignore prophet Thiel! How dare they!!!!!!!!!

The prophet then goes on to lay down the law about how his 2 or 3 house churches are to be holding services today.  They are required to listen to his sermon about the satanic and evil game of football.  Only inappropriate males will be watching the Super Bowl on Sunday.

Taking that into consideration, here is my suggested format for Sabbath services for February 2, 2013:
·         2-3 hymns (we are using the 1974 Bible Hymnal from the old WCG and the choral accompaniment)
·         Opening prayer by an appropriate male if present).
·         Sermonette (short 8-15 minute subject) or Bible New Prophecy YouTube video.  The newest one is Should Christians watch American football? and a different one can be watched instead, especially in lands outside the USA that do not have an issue with American football.
·         Announcements (which probably will be this Letter to the Brethren) and one hymn.
·         Sermon (which for most will be a recorded one), which for most of you will be The Falling Away Part 1: The Bible and Church History.  Some who missed it last week, may instead wish to watch the sermon What is the meaning of your life?
·         Final hymn.
·         Closing prayer by an appropriate male (if available).

The prophet also wants you to know that he now has a bank account so you can mail all the millions of dollars in tithe and offering money to.

We were able to open a bank account in the name of the Continuing Church of God late last Friday and so yes, you can send tithes and offerings to us at: Continuing Church of God, 1248 E. Grand #A, Arroyo Grande, CA 93420.

I suggest that he buy some wedges for his crooked bookcase, get a different kind of spray tan, invest in some new books for the book case and buy a proper lectern.  That might be money well spent.


Assistant Deacon said...

Could you imagine having to watch a Thiel video for the sermonette, and then again for the sermon?

The slitting of one's wrists would be the only "appropriate" response.

Anonymous said...

If a businessman or truckdriver gives you the idea that football displeases God, we'd blow it off as just another aberrant opinion in the world of nutcasery. But when a church guy, self ordained prophet says it on video, somehow it is not such. But it is.

Bob...who cares what you think? These are YOUR ideas and no deity from on high either inspires this tripe or endorses you to deliver this baloney.

Anonymous said...

Instead of sending him money, people should be sending him bills for the pain and suffering incurred by listening to his drivel.


Anonymous said...

Life was so much easier for Bobby when he could just write. Now he has all this speaking to do and spend time making plans for his church. I guessing there is a little bit of regret going on right now.

Douglas Becker said...

Just to insult Robert Thiel, Mikey gives his prediction for this year's Superbowl football game.

Here's betting Mikey's predictions are more accurate.

Anonymous said...

Bob you are starting to make Pack look good. At least he is an ordained "minister".

Anonymous said...

Bob says that the opening and closing prayers should be given by an "appropriate male" if "present" or "available". What happens if an appropriate male is not present or available? Under such circumstances, do they skip the prayer altogether, or do they allow/force an inappropriate male to say it?

Anonymous said...

how'd you like to be a church and have them say there will be no opening or closing prayers today because there were no appropriate males present.


Anonymous said...

Or on the other hand, what does it say if it's okay for inappropriate males to say the prayers when desperate? "Yeah, god has laws, rules, and standards, but if you're in a pinch, then you can just do whatever." But then, isn't this what COG members and ministurds have always practiced anyway?

Anonymous said...

And what happens to inappropriate males after they die? Do they get into the kingdom? I mean, if they're too low of a status and not good enough to address god at church, why would they be good enough to enter into the presence of god in the kingdom? So, we have to conclude, based upon the policies of god's double-anointed prophet (because if anyone would know, it would be him), that inappropriate males are ineligible for eternal life, right? So, why have them a) corrupt your otherwise good company, and b) waste their time going to church? Is it because god is polite and likes to avoid uncomfortable confrontations? Or is it because Bob is a respecter of persons, like COG ministurds in general have always been?

Joe Moeller said...

Brethren...Im your songleader for the day...
Bob Thiel

And now for the opening prayer...
Bob Thiel

And now for the sermonette...
Bob Thiel

And now for the announcements...
Bob Thiel

And now for the special music...
Bob Thiel

And now for the sermon...
Bob Thiel

And now for the closing prayer...
Bob Thiel

Joe Moeller
Cody, WY

Byker Bob said...

Our pastor took an impromptu verbal survey during the sermon this afternoon regarding the outcome of the Superbowl. He also, to demonstrate the relative importance of it, asked if anyone knew who had won it ten years ago, five years ago, etc, and then reminded us of the single most important event in the history of mankind 2,000 years ago. Some of the church's neighborhood groups will probably get together and enjoy the Superbowl this afternoon, but the key to it all is perspective.

The way to keep Thiel in perspective is to read the Bible. It was not the norm for them to proclaim that they were annointed to the office of prophet, or to brag about the size of their work. By simply doing the work effectively, they gradually gained the respect of some and the hatred of others, but as a group they were not self-promoters as would be one whose background was in advertising or marketing. That would be one of the major contaminants which HWA introduced into the gospel, and hopefully would raise some serious red flags.


Joe Moeller said...

Thiel, who obviously is reading this blog, responds in his latest letter, here...

He claims three radio broadcasts. Two of them apparently on networks that contain 60 radio stations.

If it was something like Clear Channel communications, then it is "possible" that he might have cleared the one million mark "en toto" for both programs.

If it was a smaller network like Salem, then it would be more like 500k en toto.

If it was Crawford Broadcasting, then perhaps 200k en toto.

Nonetheless, he did not clear two million, and at best half that. Not possible, no not even being on in every single top 60 market twice on the best network.

Clear Channel Los Angeles top talk station KFI, which covers all of Southern Cal has a max of 80k listeners at any given time during prime time. Down market , in market position #60, like Birmingham , AL you would have 3k listeners for the top rank Clear Channel talk station.

The stats presented here are from arbitron.

The median for all stations is close to Salt Lake City or Cleveland. Both of those stations would be around 7800 listeners. Multiplying by 60 you get around 500k listeners per time , IF it was during prime time day, and IF it was on Clear Channel, making again a MAXIMUM of 1 million listeners for Thiel for two times.

This if ONLY it was the Clear Channel , and much lower if on any other network.

Thiel, please provide the network that you were on so that we can be more accurate here.

Keep in mind here that this isnt for the "Bob Thiel Show" but rather for a guest appearance on another hosts show and for a captive audience of that show, NOT for people that were deliberately tuning in for Thiel.

I can easily email SPAM a couple of million people or more with any message I want for a couple of thousand dollars for lists produced and sent from Indonesia or such. THIS DOES NOT MAKE ME A PROPHET or indicates effectiveness.

Joe Moeller
Cody, WY