Monday, January 16, 2017

I am the most accurate PROPHET in the Church of God now!



Where would the Church of God be without self-appointed know-it-all's in its midst?  For decades the church has had a legion of men (and a few women) who have set themselves up as prophets of their god.  Men who knew first hand how the end times would be happening, had specific dates and who made "accurate" predictions.  The fun thing has always been that every single one of them have been proven liars till now.  Regardless of the record of failure we now have in our midst the  most accurate Church of God prophet ever!  He has 4 accurate prophecies to add to his resume!  He now must be followed as the one and only TRUE Church of God leader! All hail the TRUE prophet!

Who is this amazing man?  Dave Pack?  Gerald Flurry?  Rod Meredith?  James Malm?  Bob Thiel?

It is our very own Almost Arrested,  Elisha, Elijah, Amos, Joshua, Doubly Blessed, Habakkuk Bob Thiel!  Read it and weep Dave Pack!

Fourth COGwriter warning about Donald Trump confirmed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You too can read this steaming pile of bullshit here:  4th Warning

Habakkuk Thiel has a word of warring for all disbelievers:

We in the [improperly named] "continuing" Church of God “have also a more sure word of prophecy; whereunto ye do well that ye take heed, as unto a light that shineth in a dark place, until the day dawn, and the day star arise in your hearts” (2 Peter 1:19, KJV).”
Anti-Church of God skeptics do not seem to care that world events are aligning with properly understood biblical prophecy. Hopefully you are not among them.



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16 comments:

Byker Bob said...

Who cares? We already won. We weren't supposed to have any life past 1975. Too late, Bummer Bob.

BB

Unknown said...

YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST DEPARTMENT...

Peter THIEL , is a former Billionaire Facebook executive , now serving on the Trump transition team.

He has real potential in running for Governor of California. As the only TRUE PROPHET here on Banned, (LOL!) I hereby predict that when this happens, Bob Thiel (also from California) will announce that this is a sign from God or empowerment of the THIEL franchise.

Anonymous said...

will he be the one?
here we go..................................
aaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk????????

Miller Jones/Lonnie C Hendrix said...

He wouldn't have to do much to surpass his counterparts in the other ACOGs! However, even if we're generous and give him a couple of wins, compare that to the volume of predictions which have been made - I wouldn't be bragging about my prophetic chops if I were him!

Anonymous said...

The most accurate prophet of all is the one who makes no predictions.

DennisCDiehl said...

I have two Ordination Documents, one signed by Herbert W. Armstrong and David Antion and a second backdated by Joseph Tkach to May 1975 (Why I never knew) that I'd sell Almost Arrested Bob. They say "in perpetuity" so there is no expiration date. Come on Bob... Two ordination certifs in direct line with the succession of the Apostles with no expiration date! You can be quadurupally blessed if you combine them with the two blessings you already have.

cheap.....




Anonymous said...

A complete fool too delusional to be ashamed and embarrassed.

Higher levels of dopamine qualify as a symptom of disorders of brain function. That they are needed to sustain certain delusions was examined by a preliminary study on delusional disorder (a psychotic syndrome) instigated to clarify if schizophrenia had a dopamine psychosis.

Anonymous said...

Or he could go online and get one of those ministerial certificates validating that he is an apostle, prophet, evangelist -- nearly any ecclesiastical office -- and that way he could at least perform weddings and funerals legally.

And... he could also go online and get a PhD in religious studies... uh, umm, oh... never mind....

Anonymous said...

By the power vested in me by... absolutely NO ONE, I now pronounce....

Hoss said...

If you look at Bob's COGwriter post, he quotes two of his previous posts, both of which are highly speculative. And is "aligning with" the same as fulfilling?

Byker Bob said...

Hmmm. "The bragging prophet"? "The insecure prophet"?

I guess he's got to blow his own horn, or it won't get blown!

BB

Anonymous said...

The European Union has 28 countries in it, not 10. Mr. Thiel, using your prophetic skills, please tell us the final ten EU nations that will attack the USA. Tell us now!!!

Hoss said...

blow his own horn

With his sheep in the meadow, and the (cash) cows?

Byker Bob said...

Why it'll be the ten nations that the early AC students identified as the lost tribes, of course! I understand from David Jon Hill's memoires that they sat around guessing amongst
Hebrew and the European languages what names of rivers and junk sounded alike, and they threw darts to find the rest. But just like Loma's dreams and her reading of National Geographic, this, too, became doctrine and restored truth.
Congratulations, Pseudodoc, you sure know how to pick em!

BB

Anonymous said...

All this aside,I cannot help but wonder when Bob ( Doubly Blessed etc etc etc....)Thiel's ccog will have a split.Must happen surely.Even sooner than later perhaps.PLEASE!

You would almost Predict it,can't you Bob.

Hoss said...

Anon 741 wrote: wonder when Bob Thiel's ccog will have a split

Anything is possible, but it seems unlikely at this time. No one is likely to go back to LCG, and the critical mass is in Africa. If and when there is a desertion, Bob might decide to re-interpret the "falling away" doctrine.