Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Philadelphia Church of God Tells Singles What They Can Talk About On Dates

If you thought the fun loving group ensconced in the middle of Oklahoma couldn't get any crazier, get a load of the latest talking points that Joel Hilliker has laid out for PCG single members who might think about going on a date and carrying on a conversation.

Apparently PCG singles are sex crazed nymphomaniacs who get sexually turned on by conversations and it has to STOP!  Conversations lead to emotions and emotions are a DANGEROUS things in the PCG.  We just CANNOT have that!
Conversation between a man and a woman is wonderful. The two can help each other in so many ways: develop their personality, sharpen their social skills, grow in compassion and empathy, broaden their perspective and so on. 
When a spark of romantic interest enters a relationship, this can also be wonderful. But it also complicates matters somewhat, and, handled poorly, can lead to problems. 
Why problems? Because emotion—though a tremendous blessing when guided and channeled properly—is not necessarily helpful. The wrong kind of conversation between a man and a woman stokes emotion, feeds infatuation, and clouds your ability to maintain wise objectivity.
Of course one of the old standbys that leads to sexual licentiousness is music.  This time its pop music.
Just listen to pop radio, and you know it is easy to say things that get the juices going: I love you! I can’t live without you! I would walk 500 miles just to be with you!
Apparently Celtic dance music with bouncing babes is OK, but no so with pop music and "walking 500 miles.  But that's another subject when it comes to PCG.

Lil' Joel continues on with this:
We are subtler about it, but we can still stir up emotions in ways that seem gratifying but turn out to be harmful. In some situations in God’s Church, men and women are saying things to one another aimed at getting something from the other rather than really showing outgoing concern. Remember, you must give account before God for every idle word! (Matthew 12:36).
So what is so bad with singles conversations that it warrants Lil' Joel interfering? What is this deadly trap that singles fall into when they talk to each other?

This is discussion about the two of you—about your developing relationship—about how much you enjoy your time together (I’m not talking about, “Thanks, I had fun”—I’m talking about a conversation about how much fun you have together, what wonderful companions you are for each other) about the possibility of you sharing a future—about whether you’re spending enough time together—or whether you wish you could spend more time together—or how someone else asked you out but you wish you could have gone with them—etc. ad nauseam. There are thousands of variations on this theme. Whatever it is, it’s a comment or discussion that puts focus on your friendship, or your relationship. 
I’m telling you, this is a trap. 
So what is this disgusting emotion that conversations like this cause?
Why have this conversation? Because you like the little hit of excitement it gives you. But the only purpose it serves is to stir up your emotions and to feed infatuation. Such discussion also tends to have a snowball effect. Once “us” becomes a topic of discussion—it can become a greedy monster. 
A little later Lil'Joel describes the consequences of such licentious conversations. Once you start talking like this there is no turning back.  The next step is breeding like rabbits in the John Amos Field House.
In a sense, a statement like that is a promise. Every step you take toward intimacy is a step you cannot untake. That statement took you closer to full intimacy. You devoted a little piece of yourself—and you probably took possession of a little piece of the other person too. Think about it: Either you’re going to end up marrying that person—or not. It is either going to lead to another step, and then another, toward marriage—or at some point you are going to have to painfully back away from it. But you cannot undo it.
So what is a poor PCG members opposed to discuss? Here are the conversations starters:

           Talk about God’s Work and God’s truth. 
What is his/her attitude toward serving: volunteering for jobs, joining Spokesman Club, driving an extra two hours to pick someone up or visit a shut-in? 
• How important is hospitality to him/her? 
• Does he/she prefer having a lot of people around, or spending more time in solitude? 
• How important is work to him/her? 
• How important is time management? How motivated is he/she to make productive use of free time? 
• How important is it to him/her to continue their education? 
• How much energy does he/she have? Does he/she always crave activity, or does he/she need a lot of down time? 
• What is his/her attitude toward money? Is he liberal or frugal? How important are quality possessions and a high standard of living to him/her? 
• How important is it to him/her to take care of his/her things? Is he/she a do-it-yourself-type person? 
• What priority does he/she put on proper diet and exercise? 
• What value does he/she put on friendship? What about loyalty? 
• How important is open communication and honesty to him/her? 
• Is he/she a positive, upbeat person? When trials hit, how important is it to him/her to react positively? To not complain? To have joy?

You can read the entire article by Lil' Joel here: Do NOT have this conversation with your date! 


Anonymous said...

Sadly and of course, the Armstrongist apologist Ralph will tell us the TRUTH about proper relationships.

Dear Ralph,
Do you think Dorothy should have complained when Herbert W. Armstrong raped her all those times, or should she have screamed, "Ooooo, Daddy! I JUST LOVE WHEN AN APOSTLE RAPES ME!!!"

-Inquiring Minds

Anonymous said...

The caption isn't quite right. It should read "Hey girl, I'm trying to be like Jesus by maximizing my profits and minimizing my losses.'
Closet capitalist entrepreneur Joel Hilliker points out many excellent conversations starters. I especially liked his following points:
• How important is work to him/her? Yes, much profit in hard work.
• How important is time management? How motivated is he/she to make productive use of free time? Yes, yes, more, more.
• How much energy does he/she have? More energy, more profit.
• Is he liberal or frugal? Go for the frugal for best profit.

Listen to Joe folks. He's got it right this time.

Cheers TradingGuy.

Monnie said...

Oh well, it's clear that this dating couple might put their relationship above the COG they're in, and putting anything above the COG is rank idolatry, doncha know? Seriously, after all those years in WCG and at AC, I didn’t think I could be further appalled, but THIS did it!

EX-PCG said...

The first point is:

• Talk about God’s Work and God’s truth. The PCG members can't honestly talk about this.

They aren't doing God's Work and most of them have little or no understanding of The Bible.

They are just one group who are primarily composed of the modern-day Pharisees. I know whereof I

speak, because I used to be one of them.

Steve D said...

OMG One heading is "Sincerity and Truth." You've got to be kidding me. There are time when I feel sorry for the members of these church, other times I feel like they deserve whatever abuse they get. What does it take for some people to leave? What percentage of the attendees tithe? What percentage really believe that their church is the ONLY true Church? What percentage believe whatever they are told by God's "Ministers"? If they either don't believe, or don't tithe, etc. then why in the world do they stay? They must know that if they left, they would be ostracized by others, which means they are not there because they have any REAL friends there. When I left the WCG in 1975, it was as if I had died to all members. True friendships in the WCG? I don't think HWA had a single friend in his life. He had colleagues and acquaintances, but no friends. He, I believe, surrounded himself with those who he could use for his own benefit. That is not what friendship is about.

Anonymous said...

And in case this level of relationship meddling doesn't prove to be intrusive enough for the aims of PCG, they can instate prima nocta privileges for the ministry just to be sure.

Connie Schmidt said...

They should just cut to the chase...

Guys... provide a copy of your 1040 Tax Return

Gals... Provide a copy of your FICO score, and total of credit card debt.

BOTH SEXES... Run a criminal background check, and a certified medical screening.

Then... toss a pair of dice, and if it is an even number get married, and if it is odd then DONT, as anyone who has been married for a while realizes that marriage and dating is always a gamble! Thankfully for me, the dice came up the right way!

Retired Prof said...

Joel tells us, "Whatever it is, it’s a comment or discussion that puts focus on your friendship, or your relationship.
I’m telling you, this is a trap."

Oh, how right he is. I fell into the trap myself. For the past 47 years I've been pacing back and forth in the cage of matrimony--fed and watered regularly, given adequate exercise, affection, and medical care, trained to come when called, to sit, to heel, to stay staunch on point, to fetch. . . .

It's a trap, I tell you, a trap! Never risk having a conversation on a human level, especially an intimate human level, with another person. Strictly follow the guidelines Joel lays out so that you too may avoid all emotion, all passion, all human connection.

Anonymous said...

PCG boldly announces words of wisdom for singles:
1.)Don't fall in love with each other.
2.)Save all your love for PCG.
3.)First love or too much love for each other would be unhelpful to PCG.
4.)Remember God loves you only through PCG.
Loving each other and the life you might bring into this world is contrary to your love for PCG. It should be already known to you that your family will be dealt with separately and singly by PCG. Be mindful of this. It is ONLY through your blind, faithfull, and 100% OBEDIENCE TO PCG, that you too, you will be loved by God as much as God loves Fearald Slurry!
Don't lose out on all this entitlement!

Byker Bob said...

The Amstrong cults are intrusive and controlling, that is a given. Really, if there wasn't the potential for massive outright rebellion, these ministers would take total control and arrange all of the marriages in their church. They probably will in the place of "safety" if someone is dumb enough to start one.

Picture this: You are a young teenage male whose parents dragged you into the Philadelphia Cesspool. You got sick of ol' Sixpack forbidding you any kind of relevant social life that you could have with people outside his church. So, in the secret half of your now dual lifestyle, you smoke, drink, and make out. You look forward to the time you can leave home and begin imitatng your idol, Jax Teller! And then, some prudish simpleton comes crashing through, in a blatant attempt to program and guilt trip you, but somehow misses the mark in providing any sort of satisfying mold that you could really see yourself patterning your life after. Most church teenagers are smarter than the cultmeisters give them credit for! They will see this for the sterile and impotent crap that it is!


Anonymous said...

"So, what is an alternative topic of conversation that will create no regrets—and that actually is helpful?"

"Getting to Know You"..,getting to know more about you,(that tv commercial began playing in the background as I was reading there insane singles doctrine) lol! Now the PCG is anchored to those unscrupulous people from that commercial! And that seems about right!

another gem
"You don’t want to have to back off from anything you ever said or did."

Like GF destroying sermon tapes? Or is that just God's white-out?

Anonymous said...

That whole article had almost no advice on how to love someone better. There was no advice to develop better listening skills. It was more about judging people properly as if they were going to play some act or role in some church drama and God forbid they fail to follow through. How the hell will people like that handle disagreement? Not by choosing to get a better understanding of each other, but only to strive to be first to find fault in someone else.
Sounds like a shitty place to raise a family!

Anonymous said...

My question is," Are there any single people left in the PCG to date?".

Anonymous said...

“Philadelphia Church of God Tells Singles What They Can Talk About On Dates”

That little complaint is nothing compared to what really goes on in the PCG. The power-hungry local tyrants want to control everyone and everything according to their own selfish desires and pass off their own satanic abuse as the government of God. All the old sex perverts who go to the PCG insist on having things their way, and the local tyrants always agree with them, perhaps because they are all of the same degenerate mind.

The PCG just has way too many control freaks who always have to be doing nothing but evil continually to other people and passing it off as trying to “help” them. One problem is that the fake PCG ministers that Gerald Flurry set up when no WCG ministers went with his splinter group do not even know the most basic things about right and wrong! Younger people who do not go along with all the old sex perverts who are continually up to no good in the PCG get kicked out by the local dictators who happily announce that they will have to “make an example” of them.

Satanic filth like the Morleys are an example of this. Ronald Morley despises other people and treats them with utter contempt and rudely tries to pair them up with godless, lying, sex maniacs two or three times their age. Meanwhile, his perverted brat Robert Morley will go around bad-mouthing their victim to everyone else. They keep this up until they get rid of whatever stranger they arbitrarily decide to hate for no reason other than that Satan sends and directs the Morleys.

The PCG has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with obeying the laws of God at all. The PCG is all about old sex maniacs, sex perverts, and predators running wild and out of control continually. Rather than trying to get these perverts to behave themselves, the local tyrants always assist them in their evil behavior.

Once you know what really goes on in the PCG, you will never again ever believe any of their smooth-sounding lies that they write to try to sucker people into their satanic cult.

Allen C. Dexter said...

I like the summation of an old guy on an episode of Star Trek who had been rescued from a planet they colonized. He said to just put young people together and let nature take its course. We had strict moral guidelines from the old incest practicing pervert when I was at Ambassador that are similar to the ones at Bob Jones University, another bastion of super fundamentalist garbage. Before my first wife and I were married, we slipped into a little necking but nobody ever found out. I'm not a bit ashamed to admit it, and today, I regard it as a totally normal part of balanced sexuality. A big raspberry and Bronx cheer to hypocrite Herbie. We humans have to determine by reason what is normal and to be recommended, not by the made up dictates of a made up god created in the image of some narcissistic psychopath.

Redfox712 said...

Denigrating romantic affections like that what is to prevent PCG's leaders from promoting arranged marriages?

Mickey said...

Stuff like this used to make me livid when I was still in the old wcg. Most of the people I knew with solid marriages had been married before they came in. Their choices weren't limited like those raised in who drank the koolaid early. Yet they would pass on similar advice blithely.

Anonymous said...

Here's a conversation starter-

"Hey babe, I noticed you during last Feast when you were less chubby. I've since blown off the skinnier chick I was dating, because I discovered she had the Spirit of Korah. A regular Jezebel, she was! So I thought I'd ask you: What priority do you put on proper diet and exercise? Howza bout I put you on a strict diet and exercise regimen to lose about 35 pounds so you can become worthy of me?"

Anonymous said...

When I took out a young lady in the old WGC, she asked me on the first date how much money I put in the bank every week. I still remember, she asked "is it $100 $120 or $140 a week." That was good money in those days. She had the right idea. It is a good question for women to ask their dates, as well as how much money they have in the bank. If they have enough money, then the woman can let romantic affection to develop. After all, who wants to live in a trailer park.

Cheers. TradingGuy

Anonymous said...


What a sweet story for a change.
As a current "rainmaker" you yank me back to the good old days.


Anonymous said...

Jesus has a soft spot in his heart for, and loves trailer park NASCAR fans.

After all, their minds are the most moldable, and they've got guns to fight the govmint and terrists to protect this great Merika, wut iz speerchil Izreel.

Anonymous said...

This post brings back sooooooooo many bad memories of trying to date at Ambassador, in WCG, and later in other branches of the church. What a nightmare. This whole attitude cultivates such dysfunction among the single population in "the church." It's like every date is a job interview. People are so busy trying to find the "perfect person". They're extremely arrogant ("God's most righteous gift"), and extremely hyper critical of everyone, and then they just go absolutely crazy when they think they've found such a perfect specimen. This leads to all kinds of issues....like stalking. There's just such utter dysfunction within the "single scene" in any COG group - none are immune. Those poor, poor people. No wonder there's such huge issues with marriage in the COGs. My advise, date outside of "the church".

Anonymous said...


yessiree annoinimous

.....and on the third daayyy God created the Remington-bolt action raifel, so man could fight the dwinosaurs and the homoseckjuals.......


Anonymous said...

And then there's Joel's lovely sister Amy Flurry...
Years ago she found out I was baking cookies for a friend that lived several states away. She strongly warned me that if I mailed him those cookies that would be a sign of dating and could lead to serious trouble!
I couldn't believe it!
But then again, she did tell us ladies that her husband Stephen assigned books and magazines for her to read each week so that they would have similar things to discuss in the evenings!
My mother asked her if Stephen also orders her food and cuts her meat for her too!

Anonymous said...

Trailer park Christians typically lack staying power.

Anonymous said...

"Trailer park Christians typically lack staying power."

Try telling that to Joel Osteen after he's had his hair fluffed at the beauty parlor and is on his way to fluff up yet another half-witted mega-crowd!

Anonymous said...

Hormones will prevail.