Thursday, July 17, 2014

Jesus Christ, Coming On Pentecost of 2019...Prophet, Apostle and Convicted Felon Claims He Is Without Error In Proclaiming This New Date

The Church of God's most favored felon, Ron Weinland, has sent another inspiring letter from Birmingham jail.

After two previous embarrassing prophetic failures when Christ did not return on the dates Weinland predicted, the apostle spiritualized them away.  This time the apostle is CERTAIN that he cannot be wrong.

For some reason every single failed prophet has to come up with the same flimsily excuse when the dates fail.  The dates are turn into "spiritual" realities and and not a physical reality.  Its the same thing that the charlatan William Miller did in 1844 and the same thing that charlatans in the Church of God are doing today.

As God’s end-time apostle and prophet, I am now going to begin proclaiming a third date for the expected coming of Jesus Christ. At this time, this is obviously only for the Church. No one else will receive it yet, unless they are being called by God.

Does it matter that others do not believe now? No! But it does matter for God’s Church, as this has everything to do with following God wherever He leads His Church. It is for the learning, training, transforming, and greater growth of His people.

In God’s time, many in the world and the Church that has been scattered will begin to see, hear, fear, and change.

So what is this new date? It is necessary to properly set the stage for this, which concerns what God has revealed to me as a prophet. He has revealed that His purpose and design, beginning when the First Seal was opened on the day of the Apostasy (Dec. 17, 1994) to the coming of His Son to reign, contains “seven periods of 1260 days.”

The basis for establishing a third date is a matter of my function as an apostle, as I am utilizing all knowledge, clarification, and truth that God has given us to this moment in time. Since Pentecost of 2012, God has poured out upon us vast amounts of new, clarified, and needful knowledge, which has made it possible to teach and proclaim an incredibly beautiful, inspiring, and truly the clearest picture ever of what God has designed, purposed, and is now more fully bringing to pass concerning His Son, Jesus Christ, coming on Pentecost of 2019. The time from the Apostasy to the Messiah’s coming does contain 7 periods of 1260 days, plus some specific additional time that God has given as “signs” to accompany His design, revelation, and deep meaning in all that He is bringing to pass.

As a result of focusing on two previous dates, those in God’s Church have been mightily matured and strengthened through that experience, and we have consequently grown in greater wisdom and have been far more fully prepared for where we are now and where we are headed – far more than what we were before Pentecost of 2012. As a matter of faith and of seeing a clear, clarified, and completed picture of God’s purpose from the Apostasy to Christ’s return, I do not believe it is possible that this new date has any error or lack of understanding in its calculation (which will be addressed a little later). Having said that, if for any reason the timing were to go beyond this new date in 2019, then we can be certain that God will reveal much more to us in order to give us even greater understanding, just as He has in the past. If indeed this proved to be the case, we would simply continue moving forward, following Him wherever He leads His Church.

According to Weinerdude, it is mathematically IMPOSSIBLE for him to be wrong...this time....

6) Beginning with Pentecost 2012, the combined period of 42 months along with the final seventh cycle of 1260 days ends during the Days of Unleavened Bread in 2019. Not only that, but more importantly, it ends on the day of the “wave-sheaf offering” from when the count for Pentecost begins.

Again, the mathematical probability of this alone, along with the absolute impossibility of the combined previous 5 numerical fulfillments all working together in harmony and unison of purpose as they do, giving such exacting times and dates, simply magnifies the glory and power of God to purpose, design, and fulfill such a thing.
 Its time for the braying jackass to shut up.


Anonymous said...

Wow! Christ would come and this False Prophet would find himself left out. It is not the coming of Christ but this convicted felon being left out that is ironic and funny. Understand that he got to have the hope of his idiot followers continuing so that cash is continually coming. He is being left out for the simple reason that he is making a living out of the name of Christ. These kinds of people deserve to the the first ones to be thrown in the lake of fire.

Anonymous said...

Yes, he's without error, unless...

Well, you know, Ron's god can never really make up his mind about these things. He might have to reveal some exciting and awesome excuse for changing his mind again in a few years.

Stay tuned, suckers.

Black Ops Mikey said...

Just enough time to gather millions more dollars and high tail it to a country without extradition.

Anonymous said...

That crusty prophecy has been overdue for nearly 2,000, now.

About 14 years ago, something I ordered and was sent in the mail never arrived.

Although Jesus may claim to be more powerful than the United States Postal Service, any claim he laid to that was lost millennia ago.

There are people who believe Weinland's latest "JESUS IS COMING" prophecy?

They should look at the results of the other zillion "JESUS IS COMING SOON" prophecies throughout history.
They have all been wrong, just like HWA was.

But thankfully and of course, folks, we who have the Holy Spirit all KNOW that Jesus is coming soon!

(My megachurch preacher helped me to get pumped up and believe this- with the fervency of a Hitler Youth Rally attendee!)

Anonymous said...

Mr. Ron just writes gobbledygook.
I just realized 2 + 2 = 4. This means the sun will rise tomorrow in the east. Thus I am a prophet. Send me $$$. My successful prophecy rate is 100%. Mr. Ron's rate is 0%.

Byker Bob said...

You have to wonder if maybe there is a problem with tertiary syphilis.

How many of us would think it logical to prophesy that Jesus would return on one specific date, let alone making a series of embarrassing mistakes and not catching a faint clue that perhaps this is not a terribly good idea?

Any prophecy coming from and based upon Armstrongism is going to fail. You can't even say with certainty any more that people will produce revenue from their false prophecy.


Connie Schmidt said...


doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Assistant Deacon said...

"Weinland" is the name of a territory behind bars, nothing more.

Anonymous said...

Totally predictable, and yet, effing unbelievable. This is how to keep false hope alive and the $$$ rolling in...been like clockwork for the last 2000 years!

And yet in 2019 Ron will come up with some more additional reasons why an obvious falsification of his prophecies and the self-evident fact that NOTHING happened is some sort of something spiiiiiritual happening which is far more "amazing" and "humbling" than if what he said would happen had happened. But let's face it, what Ron is predicting is something that's NEVER gonna happen.

Here's betting that 6 years removal from the last debacle will be enough time for "the faithful" to have fully forgotten the last song and dance set of excuses to that effect, and therefore, the same material that worked before will work again.

James said...

Ron's going for the final blowout. He has bills to pay and his sheeple will pay them. After 2019 he may be able to retire. It depends how fucking stupid his tithe slaves are.

James said...

Anon wrote : "And yet in 2019 Ron will come up with some more additional reasons why an obvious falsification of his prophecies and the self-evident fact that NOTHING happened is some sort of something spiiiiiritual happening which is far more "amazing" and "humbling" than if what he said would happen had happened"

He may have a new set of tithe slaves by then. Remember, the ACOG's are like the revolving door at McDonald's. They come and they go, but the job opening always gets filled and the work is always done.

Anonymous said...

So Pentecost 2019 - Sunday, Monday or Sivan 6?

Anonymous said...

"So Pentecost 2019 - Sunday, Monday or Sivan 6?"

When Jebus returns in 2019, he'll finally endorse one and put an end to the controversy...except for the Jews, since they don't believe in Jebus. (Even Jebus can't please all of the people all of the time. It's not like he's god or something.) Unless, of course, he returns spiiiiritually again, so we won't even be able to tell that he returned, like all the other times.

Anonymous said...

Before Mr. Lavey died in 1997, he used to teach us from the writings of Ayn Rand, Aleister Crowley, and Neitsche. Magus Gilmore is not as well grounded in those things, although he continues to teach us how to mock and put down members of the Deity, and to especially trash mega-churches and all the silly hypocrites that attend them.

If anyone wants to learn how to detect the spirit of Mr. LaVey in the writing of some posters, they should Google 'Anton LaVey', and read the Wikipedia article.


Anonymous said...

My 100% accurate prophetic prediction is that his date will be as false as his other false prophesies, and as false as Dave Packs false prophesies!

I find it amazing that every prediction of the timing of the return of Jesus made by Jesus himself, and all of the others claiming to speak on his behalf have been 100% wrong, 100% of the time.

Nemesis of Pack

old EXPCG hag said...

They must have him locked up away from general population.

He's done gone HE HA!

Black Ops Mikey said...

Jesus Christ issued this official statement from his website today:

"My Father and I have watched while Ronald Weinland has lied to those following him in the PKG and we are both appalled at the unmitigated gall this false prophet has exhibited. Unless he really deeply repents and very soon now, we will throw him into the Lake of Fire. He would disrupt the Kingdom and create chaos: We will not have liars hurt people in our Kingdom.

"The Father has informed me that I will not be returning in 2019, just to be certain that no one can claim that any of Ronald Weinland prophecies ever comes to pass."