Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Elijah Pack Says He Is Such A Superfantabulous Speaker That You Will Be Unable To Stop Listening To Him

The self appointed Elijah wanna-be Davey Pack has posted the start of his superfantabulous sermon series that contain ONE HUNDRED THIRTY "proofs" on why he is the most superfantabulous Elijah to walk this earth since the "real" one. Herbert Armstrong be damned, Elijah Dave's the man!

Elijah Dave feels some need to have 130 "proof's" on why he is such a sinless creature.  Elijah Dave has elevated himself ABOVE Jesus with these 130 "proof's" of virtue.

Dave starts his latest self-serving slobberfest concerning his speaking abilities and wisdom with this :

After 15 minutes, you will not want to stop. And don’t let your minister stop you. He cannot give you eternal life!

Apparently salvation is NOT possible without Elijah Dave.

With Elijah Dave's immaculate and ungodly appearance upon this earth his god will stop his destruction of the earth now that he Elijah Dave is here.  The entire Church of God has apparently been waiting in eager anticipation for Elijah Dave's arrival.  Don't worry about the coming of Jesus, Elijah Dave is MORE important.

Among the most important prophecies in Scripture, Malachi 4:5-6 states that without the end-time Elijah’s arrival, God would “smite the earth with utter destruction”! Thousands with a Church background are waiting for Elijah (Matt. 17:11), believing this man to be one of the Two Witnesses (Rev. 11:3). Scripture makes clear this theory is ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. But, if Herbert W. Armstrong was not the Elijah, who was he? The answer is crucial in ways only the sermon can show you, and must be understood before God reunifies His people.

Next Elijah Dave waxes eloquent on how eloquent and charming he is as a speaker.  No other man in human history has ever been as dynamic or wise as Elijah Dave.  Jesus' words pale in comparison to God's most important man to ever live in the Church of God.

Elijah Dave's message was sooooooooooooooooooooooo superfantabulous that not one single person in the ENTIRE Restored Church of God disagreed with him!  NOT ONE!  Well of course not!  Given that they would quickly be disfellowshipped and marked for doing so.  Families would be broken and marriages destroyed, but Elijah Dave needs to be believed.

These are the most important messages I have ever given. Hundreds in The Restored Church of God have commented in just the last two days like this: “electrifying,” “exhilarating,” “amazing,” “gripping,” “game-changing,” “awesome,” “captivating,” “overwhelming,” “tremendously inspiring,” “profound,” “mind-blowing” and “emphatically irrefutable.” Great numbers said they understood the message in less than 10 proofs. Few even needed the LAST 100 PROOFS! And no one—none!—to our knowledge out of thousands who heard has disagreed, and we have heard from virtually every pastorate in the world!
Elijah Dave's message is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo incredible that it will soon divide every single Church of God right down the middle.  Elijah Dave takes great delight in knowing he intends to destroy more families and lives.

To reject Elijah Dave and his message is equivalent to rejecting the entire Bible.  The Bible was written to foretell the coming of Elijah Dave and his message of redemption destruction.

These messages will eventually divide the splinters and slivers down the middle. There are two kinds of people. Those driven by emotion—and those led by the Holy Spirit who are driven by scripture, truth, facts, evidence, proof and simple logic. Perhaps half the people you meet with will agree, and the other half will attack. THERE IS NO AVOIDING THIS. But, to reject their message, one must reject a host of IMPOSSIBLE TO MISUNDERSTAND Scriptures!


Anonymous said...

A braying jackass How appropriate.

Anonymous said...

Where's Dennis when we need him?

"I want to make a statement about...me...now, if I became deceived, I will never tell you what I'm going to tell you now...I am telling you if I go off into strange ideas, misconduct, rebellion, you name it, don't follow me. I want to tell you that now, because if I start doing that I'm gonna try to get you to follow me! I'm gonna come to you and tell you it doesn't apply, it doesn't mean me, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's OK to follow me because ABCD and XY and Z. Do you understand what I'm saying? Listen to me now, when I tell you don't follow me if I go off into weird ideas, or if I get off into other things that are total absolutely unscriptural conduct, because if I do I'm gonna paint it with a different face and try to get you to follow me. Do you understand what I'm saying brethren? Please remember that, because I promise you that if I become deceived, I'll forget it, and I'll want you to forget it...And I hope you'll remember it well enough to quote it right back to me..."

—Dave Pack, December 12, 1998

What I wanna know is, since now Davey is busy telling everyone he's "Elijah," does he still think he's "Joshua" from the book of Haggai, or has he given up on that one?

Either way, the idea that DCP is "spiritually," "symbolically," or a literal reincarnation of anybody from the bible (I am not sure in what sense he means these dopey things) these are all unscriptural, strange, and weird ideas.

Okay, Dave! We remember, just like you wanted us to, and we're quoting it back to you, just like you asked. We agree, you've "become deceived" and done all these things you warned us you were going to do. Your words, not mine.

Byker Bob said...

Why would Dave pick as his guiding pattern the prophet who was most noteworthy as a sufferer of depression?

It seems perfectly obvious that Dave is in the middle of some sort of hellacious manic cycle, based on this latest barrage. As the highs get higher, the lows go even lower.

I firmly believe that there is going to be a very hard crash in the man's near future! I don't really feel much of a need to say more than that.


NO2HWA said...

BB My fear is that when this deviate crashes he is going to take others lives down with him. We have the potential of another Jim Jones forming before our eyes.

Anonymous said...

The man is mentally ill

EX-RCG said...

I stopped listening to him over 10 years ago. It's too bad others continued to be mesmerized by him.

No one ever called most COG members smart. Most are naive and gullible. Many are way too trusting.

RCG members it's time to make your escape!

Mark Wolfe said...

To sum up Dave's reasoning:

He had a problem with a women in the church who was struggling with Dave's Haggai and Zechariah prophecy, which, according to Dave is clearly in the New Testament writings. But the women asked if this is so, why did not HWA restore that knowledge, if he was indeed the Elijah who restored all things.

Of course, Dave's ministers could not answer that question because they follow Dave blindly without thought.

So this caused Dave to ask God for direction. God led Dave, through the scriptures, and his own human reasoning to come up with the following reasons as to why he is actually the Elijah that restores all things.

Aaron Dean and Dibard Apartian (who, according to Dave, was HWA's best friend) said the Herbert did not believe that he was the Elijah by the end of his life. And, actually, it was an apostate, Herman Hoeh, who came up with the theory that Moses and Elijah were the two witnesses.

And, if Mr. Armstrong were alive today, he would say that the final, greater, end-time work would have to be led by the Elijah. Because "prophecy again" would allude to a restoration, as opposed to just "prophecy", which is what Armstrong merely did.

Also, Mr. Armstrong admitted to Dale Schurter that he only restored all that he saw-----and not all things.

Dave says that he had to restore more that was lost from the apostasy in the Philadelphia era than what Armstrong had to restore from the Sardis era. Because of this God led him to name his church the Restored Church of God.

Herbert Armstrong did not know severely doctrines like the identities of the 144,000, the 1335, the Synagogue of Satan and the King of the South.

Jesus revealed these to Dave and not Herbert.

Herbert is Moses and still Zerubabbel. Dave is both Joshua from Haggai and Zechariah and the other Joshua that followed Moses into the Promised land. This is because Dave constantly points to HWA as a man to follow the same way Joshua pointed to Moses as a man to follow.

Also, Dave has had to edit much of Herb's writings much like Elijah had to edit Moses' writings. Herbert was also viewed as a "Moses figure" while in the old WCG----Dave says this is a fact that Herbert was considered more of a Moses than an Elijah.

Elijah was the prophet who appeared suddenly after the greatest apostasy in Israelite history. So the church era Elijah would have to come after the greatest apostasy in church history. This is why the Elijah could not possibly be Herbert Armstrong and could only be a man that came after 1995.

And ultimately the main proof is the man who comes to identify the end time Moses, is the individual who is Elijah.

And, finally, if you have even a flicker of God's spirit you can't disagree.

The remnant are desperately trying to find this Elijah, waiting for him to be sent, but he had been here all along.

His name is David C. Pack.

Anonymous said...

130 as 13 x 10?
13 is revered by Satanists and the occult as the number of DEATH, and
evil. Dangerous Dave and his crazy cult.

RSK said...

Hold it, hold it. When did Elijah edit Moses? Wasn't that supposed to be Ezra?
And I can't find it on his site again.

Anonymous said...

Dave never could work with or for anyone. The next revelation will be 150 reasons why he is both of the Two Witnesses.

Anonymous said...

Satanic. Simply satanic.

Jim Jones move over. A new kids in town.

old EXPCG hag said...

Is Gerald Flurry saying this because I've noticed Dave Pack copies GF a lot. He can't come up with things on his own...
"Oh, Brother...where art thou!?!?"

old EXPCG hag said...

...I'm talking about the Elijah thing.

Anonymous said...

Just look at the news today! Look at how the entire world is reacting to this ISIS atrocity, burning a Jordanian pilot alive.

Yet, didn't Dave Pack wish this same fate, not on one, but on three of his competitor splinter leaders as part of his Haggai fantasy?

~Miguel de la Rodente

Black Ops Mikey said...

Makes Eric King look positively reasonable.

Connie Schmidt said...

Near to the end of this sermon, Pack explains his interpretation of the phrase ‘all things in common’ (Acts 2:44 & 4:32): sell everything you have and send the money to him.
“It’s absolutely biblical that what we have, we sell, whatsoever we have, we give it to God’s work. That’s why we were called. You’re not allowed to hold on to your own income.”
“You are not allowed to hold on to your own assets. You have an income, you live a wonderful life, life goes on normally. But if you were called by God and you are to participate in His work and walk in His ways, you have to turn over your assets to God’s church. That’s the pattern.”
“It won’t leave you a pauper, it won’t break your life.”

Anonymous said...

Where is the URL for this?

NO2HWA said...

the link is under "self-serving slobberfest" above.

Anonymous said...

Just when you think Baghdad Dave's descent into madness might be complete, he plumbs new depths of strange and weird.

In retrospect, the whole history of Armstrongism is a litany of strange and weird ideas, beginning with HWA who began making false prophecies over the radio while molesting his daughter and then claimed himself to be a latter-day apostle leading the one and only "true church" in the whole wide world, later descending into the "batshit-crazy zone" by proclaiming himself to be the "Elijah" mentioned by Malachi, and by 1981 had gone beyond batshit-crazy by pronouncing himself "Zerrubbabel." Obviously, all of that was bogus, if only because he molested his own daughter for 10 years.

But all that is history. HWA died, and now many, if not most in the ACOGs, while they still think he might have been an apostle, with his 18 Truths Restored Finally After 1900 Years (Now Worship Me With Your Cash), they don’t think he fulfilled any bible prophecies (as if we should expect such a thing…) And then, along come a whole slew of Mini-Me "prophetic" characters, such as Baghdad Dave.

In 1998, Baghdad Dave appeared to be relatively humble (the operative words here being "appeared" and "relatively").

"... I am telling you if I go off into strange ideas, misconduct, rebellion, you name it, don't follow me. I want to tell you that now, because if I start doing that I'm gonna try to get you to follow me! ... Listen to me now, when I tell you don't follow me if I go off into weird ideas, or if I get off into other things that are total absolutely unscriptural conduct, because if I do I'm gonna paint it with a different face and try to get you to follow me. Do you understand what I'm saying brethren? Please remember that, because I promise you that if I become deceived, I'll forget it, and I'll want you to forget it ... And I hope you'll remember it well enough to quote it right back to me ..."
—Dave Pack, December 12, 1998

I'm not sure if this came from the same sermon or not, according to E&SN it was in a sermon entitled, "Where the Vultures are Gathered," obviously given at around the same time, probably also in 1998:

"I'm not going to claim to behold some high office, or I am some kind of 'secret apostle' in waiting. Baloney. I don't think that way."

Maybe at that time you didn't, Dave. Because that would certainly be baloney if you did. It would be strange and weird if you were to go off and start thinking that way.

Strange and Weird

But that was then. By 2005, things were different. In Baghdad Dave's sermon entitled, "21st Century Apostle" he proved he'd already gone off the deep end:

"The responsibilities Christ expects me to do...While I have apostolic authority, ... Mr. Armstrong was a Apostle. Yes brethren I hold that office. I do... If the highest office in Restored Church of God is not an apostle, then I was not sent by Christ."
—Dave Pack, February 26, 2005

Well, one thing is for sure, Baghdad Dave, who by 1985 already had WCG members circulating an open letter calling for his dismissal due to his authoritian style and many abuses, was certainly NOT sent by any god! And for Baghdad Dave to say he's an apostle is both strange and weird. That's right, Dave, you're not an "apostle" and neither was Herbert Armstrong. But HWA also went off later into other strange and weird ideas, and you have followed him there too.


Anonymous said...

"These are the most important messages I have ever given. Hundreds in The Restored Church of God have commented in just the last two days like this: “electrifying,” “exhilarating,” “amazing,” “gripping,” “game-changing,” “awesome,” “captivating,” “overwhelming,” “tremendously inspiring,” “profound,” “mind-blowing” and “emphatically irrefutable.”"

It looks like the staggering electromagnetic field coming from the high tension wires that span the glorious campus (conveniently located next to the Wadsworth Giant Eagle) is creating a high energy feedback loop within our 21st Century Apostle's compound.


Anonymous said...



In 2013, Baghdad Dave continued his descent into the realm of batshit crazy with "Special Announcement #20" in which he told everyone he was the modern day fulfillment of an obscure so-called "end-time prophecy" found in Haggai and Zechariah:

"Accept the facts from God’s Word! The honest reader will at least admit that someone fulfills the role of Joshua today. Someone, somewhere—one man—must do this. And realize that this man would (so obviously) be the first to know who he was. Imagine Joshua not knowing he was Joshua. I learned my identity almost four years ago. Haggai’s prophecy means you must learn it now."
—Dave Pack, Friday, June 28, 2013

That was stranger and weirder, perhaps, but also predictable.

Beyond Batshit-Crazy

Now Baghdad Dave has gone beyond the "batshit crazy zone" into whatever zone lies below that, because now, on top of calling himself a latter-day apostle and the "Joshua" to HWA's batshit crazy "Zerrubbabel," he's added a new prophetic title to his already mythological résumé Now, in his latest spate of sermons and 130 reasons it must be true, I guess he's demoting HWA to "Moses" and promoting himself to the role of the one-and-only superfantabulous end-time "Elijah."

Since you're now calling yourself an "apostle," "Joshua," and "Elijah," at this point you definitely do think this way. And you're right, Dave, it is all strange, weird, baloney, and beyond batshit-crazy.

Anonymous said...

This will not end well.

Anonymous said...

In the Kingdom, there will be a chorus of high-kicking chorus girls, singing,

Few things in the Kingdom will be more entertaining, except maybe viewing the movie Krazy Kingdom Klowns from Outer Space.

Currently, I am honing my Kingdom skills by testing different varieties of popcorn.
(And also the most durable barf bags, in case any Promise Keepers make it there.)

Michael said...

Absolutely unbelievable.

Just popped in, but this guy is so full of himself it's not even funny.
Actually it is pretty funny, so long as you're not stuck under his narcissistic control.

Just browsing through part 3 I get this:
"Without [me] God said he would strike the earth with utter destruction"
"I may turn out to be the most attacked human being in the last 6000 years"
"Now i understand more than ever that God had to look after me in a unique way. I guess he'd have to do that if I were just an apostle, but ..."

If I were just an apostle :-)

"In so many ways I have Elijah's own personality".
"I'm cut from a different cloth from the rest".

Can't make this stuff up.

How self-absorbed can you get.^o^

Anonymous said...

"I'm cut from a different cloth from the rest".

Apparently that cloth shrunk a bit before you wore it, Dave.
BTW, are you related to Officer Dingle?

old EXPCG hag said...

I wonder if special "David" might have been given special "understanding" as a young child just like my special "David" was given because they THINK they are special to God because of their special name, "David", meaning "beloved". My special "David" told me he would ask God, "What do you want me to do?"
I no longer believe that God picks your name as HWA taught.Your name could be special "David" and you turn out to be a serial killer!