Friday, July 8, 2016

Let's Paaaaarty! Tribulation Will Not Begin Until 2020 or Later!!!!!

What a relief to find out this week that the tribulation will NOT happen until at least 2020!  This magnificent news is courtesy of the Almost Arrested Self-Appointed False Prophet Elisha Elijah Joshua Amos Thiel.  

Time to pop open the Dom PĂ©rignon and have some bacon wrapped dates!

All of the blustering by Dave Pack and Gerald Flurry is totally worthless now that prophet Bob has spoken!

Will his people in Africa care or even know when the crap has hit the fan in 2020?
When is the earliest year that the Great Tribulation can?  
Various ones seem to feel that it can begin in 2016 or 2017 or that it already started some time ago. 
Those who believe and understand what the Bible actually teaches realize that the Great Tribulation cannot begin before 2020.
Jesus gave a variety of signs/events that had to happen prior to the start of the Great Tribulation in Matthew 24. Not only have many not happened, a preceding event in Daniel 9:27 involving the confirmation of a seven-year deal still has not happened. Since it did not happen as of July 7, 2016, this means that it is not possible for the Great Tribulation to begin for at least 3 1/2 years (half of a biblically-prophetic week). 
At this instant, unless we see more major conflict in the Middle East between now and the end of the Summer, it is unlikely that the Great Tribulation can begin prior to 2021.
People who claim to be COG, like James Malm and Ronald Weinland, are in error as to timing as they have looked to their own understanding instead of what the Bible teaches. 
We all know that James Malm and Ron Weinland are both liars, but this also includes Bob Thiel.  He is as big of a liar and false prophet as those two are.

The false prophet then goes on to list 35 reason as to why everyone is wrong except his holiness.

Read them all here:  The Great Tribulation Cannot Begin Before 2020!

The Almost Arrested false prophet then has to get in another dig at his surogate daddy, rod Meredith. that has disappointed him so terribly:
It should be noted that leaders in the Living Church of God and/or the United Church of God confirmed to me personally that I was biblically correct on all the above points, despite the fact that their respective churches hold to several of the errors pointed out above. Those who rely too much on a compromised ministry (Ezekiel 34:7-10) to teach them prophecy that is not truly in accordance with scripture need to realize that according to Jesus’ words in Revelation 2 & 3 and Luke 21, only relatively few Christians will be protected from the hour of trial that will come upon the whole world.
As bitter and angry as Thiel is, he just may start his own apocalypse in 2020 just to get revenge against Rod Meredith.


Anonymous said...

Its hard to pick which leader of a Church of God is the biggest liar any more. All of them are absolute idiots. There are no men of integrity any more in the church.

Connie Schmidt said...

Thiel needs to be on a watch list. He would "press the button" just to see all his self centered prophecies come true.

Byker Bob said...

None of them know what they are talking about to the extent that any thinking person could or should pattern their lives after what these wannabe prophets have to say. Mentally, it just doesn't compute that even those who would be more likely to be taken seriously (Bob Thiel is not one of these) would have a single supporter, just based on their past guessing.

The problem is probably tithes. Some people need to find a place to cut loose with their tithes. They believe that to qualify to receive them, a teacher must teach and support some version of the basic Armstrong package, including making inane and clueless false prophecies. If tithers sought out teachers with good fruits instead, who taught Christian living principles based on the Sermon on the Mount and the Beatitudes, all of the Armstrong worshipping prophets would dry up due to lack of funds.

Let's see if some sort of pattern starts to emerge here. If the Spirit of God were involved with the Armstrong movement, you would expect these ACOG teachers to come together in one unified voice, to get behind a single timeline and message. Rock and roll, baby! And, it just ain't happenin' at all.


Stephen said...

Well I guess Almost Arrested Elisha Elijah Joshua Amos Thiel's first mistake is in guessing that any of the words, either in Matt 24, Luke 21, Revelation 2 & 3, or indeed anywhere else in the bible, are actually the words of "Jesus" in the first place. And in the second, those prophecies about "the great tribultion," the "day of the lord," and the supernatural return of some celestial "Son of Man," whoever you think that was supposed to have been, are among the greatest disproofs of the christian texts, and subsequently, of christianity:

Mark 9:1 And he said to them, Truly I tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power.

Matthew 16:28 Truly I tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom.

Luke 9:27 Truly I tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the kingdom of God.

It's in the triple tradition for crying out loud, but still, nobody standing anywhere in the first century has avoided a nice heaping serving of death, and yet, none of them saw the things promised. A clear false prophecy if ever there was one.

But I'll leave it up to you, the reader. Do you think Jesus, or Mark/Matthew/Luke were the false prophets here? Take your pick.

DennisCDiehl said...

Not only were Matthew, Mark and Luke false "prophets" about the coming of the Son of Man and the Kingdom of God, but so was the Apostle Paul. None of them could agree on the birth stories of Jesus. None of them agree on what happened at his death and when and where they first met up again or who actually saw what and where. None agree on when Gospel Jesus left the planet and from where it took place. Of course, no Matthew , Mark or Luke actually wrote the variant Gospels and those names were affixed decades later to give anonymous and no eyewitness stories some credibility. Matthew and Luke clean up Mark along the way and Paul never heard of any of them or the stories about earthly Jesus since Paul never met any earthly Jesus though bragged about being a Pharisee of the Pharisees at the same time in Jerusalem. The Gospels never heard of any Saul the Pharisee who was "above his fellows". Jesus for Paul was the Cosmic Christ, crucified in the heavens by the Archons. His view was Gnostic in content. The Gospels were written long after he died.

So it is all rather suspect. The Book of Revelation is a knock off update of the Book of Daniel which also was not written in the 6th century BCE but rather the second to encourage the Jews in the Maccabean revolt against Rome. Revelation was updated to encourage the Jewish Christians to hang in during the seige of Jerusalem in 70 by the Romans. Rome won.

Bible "Prophecy" is the slippery slope that all the COG speculators who can't stand living in the present and must seem like they know the future which they don't , that will destroy their credibility if there actually is any to destroy in the first place.

They all have serious religious personality disorders....

Bobby Thiel is kidding himself about his prophetic insights. He's an insecure and God Haunted wanna be who will come and go just like all the others will.

Lake of Fire Church of God said...

Double dipping double dose almost arrested Bitter Bobby Thiel said, "Those who believe and understand what the Bible actually teaches realize that the Great Tribulation cannot begin before 2020".

MY COMMENT - Actually, according to classic Armstrongism 101, the Great Tribulation cannot begin anywhere near 2020 because the next complete 19 year time cycle dating back to 1934 when the Philadelphia era allegedly began doesn't happen until year 2029.

Sheesh, I have been out of Armstrongism for 40 years and yet I haven't forgotten the importance of 19 year time cycles commencing the Great Tribulation in 1972. What's Thiel's excuse?


Anonymous said...

If you reject trade and the accompanying carrot and stick of profit and loss, how do you motivate people. Why by terror religion of course. Hence Herbies "by the authority of the living God, I tell you the end is 5 to 7 years away," over and over for 50 years. What happened to 'don't bare false witness against your neighbour'?

Cheers TradingGuy

Anonymous said...

Richard, 19 years is half the wave length of 38, the 'golden rectangle' number. Many facial ratios are 38%, as are many ancient buildings. In fact other numbers like 21 and 34 are more significant than 38. At any rate, this is the arena of mathematics and probability, something the ministry are not trained in.

Ralph said...

on July 9, 2016 at 12:34 AM
Trading Guy wrote:-

"What happened to 'don't bare false witness against your neighbour'?"

How do you suppose one should consider this:- "Pro 24:28 Be not a witness against thy neighbour without cause; and deceive not with thy lips." Bolding mine and just asking.


Black Ops Mikey said...

Cosmologists and astronomers believe that the apocalypse will be 10,000,000 A.D. give or take a few minutes.

At that time, the earth will be exposed to radiation from a neutron star which will instantly -- give or take a few nanoseconds -- kill all life on earth, at which time all prophecies up to that point will become, well... pointless.

DennisCDiehl said...

A 19 year cycle just means the night sky will look exactly the same as 19 years ago or 38 years from tonight...etc

Byker Bob said...

I've only kept one of my 'cycles for 19 or more years. If they are well-built and you don't abuse them, and you change the oil and do your maintenance regularly, they will last a long time.

One thought on these weird theories about the reptiles, or British Israel, Simon Magus, the "True History of the True Church", or any other Armstrong-spawned know-it-all answers: When someone comes to you with these types of explanations, it serves as an indicator that the poor quality of the research and thinking, and the paucity of factual material does not just restrict itself to this one area. It is also a very good indicator as to the quality of the research behind their theology as well! You can't just take the theology at face value and hold it as sacrosanct and separate from the crudeness and ridiculousness of the cultic theories, because all of the material is coming from the same place, and born of the same thought processes. During the time span of our membership, when we heard theories like this one which Electolux is spouting, it should have raised huge red flags about everything else which we were taught! Problem is, once baptized (too late) they forbade us from reading or consulting the outside sources which would have been our checks and balances, providing second opinions.

The regular posters know this. It's good to repeat it, though, for the benefit of the current ACOG members who may read it when they get home from sabbath services.


Connie Schmidt said...

Dennis wrote:
"A 19 year cycle just means the night sky will look exactly the same as 19 years ago or 38 years from tonight...etc"

ACTUALLY: That would only apply to the Sun and Moon and the stars. The 19 year cycle is known as the Metonic Cycle and was well known to Babylonian astronomers anciently.

But there are other planets that are moving about in the cosmos that change the night sky. There is some argument about how long it would be for all the celestial objects to be back in the same relative spots, but a a good answer with some demonstrated reason is that it would take 360,546,882,006,507 YEARS for any given night sky to reappear again.

Here is a website with the math and method...

Anonymous said...

Ralf, you ask:
"How do you suppose one should consider this:- "Pro 24:28 Be not a witness against thy neighbour without cause; and deceive not with thy lips." Bolding mine and just asking."

Another bible translation expresses it as:
(CEV) "Don't accuse anyone who isn't guilty. Don't ever tell a lie"

Notice the 'without cause," ie trade.
Another possible meaning is to not spread peoples garden variety sins around. Love covers sins, no?

Cheers TradingGuy

Anonymous said...

Would you buy a used car from Rod, or any other of the sliver leaders?
Dave Pack would probably try to pick your pocket whilst showing you the car.