"Paradise Recovered" and Ohio's Well Spring Retreat Recovery Center

 Many people have been so scared by abusive religion that they have no idea on where to turn.  There is a facility in Ohio that is geared to helping those recovering from abusive churches, religious systems and other abusive thought systems.  Their work can either be secular in base or pastoral.

Wellspring Retreat Center

Many who come from abusive religious systems are not able to rationalize what has happened to them with what their faith promotes as truth.  When that is ripped away, many fall into a spiritual void. Many still long for something deeper that brings meaning to their lives but do not know what to do.  Others, have had enough and leave faith based systems.  However, they still need to deal with the rejection, the loss of every thing they had been rooted in, the familial ties that broken, and more.

The Wellspring Recovery Center is also sponsoring a screening of "Paradise Recovered".

Paradise Recovered, the film made by a former WCG member has been making the rounds of numerous film festivals.  It has been getting rave reviews.

Synopsis:

Esther Harris, a young woman praised for her virtue and devotion to Warren F. Vanderbilt’s Prophetic Watchman Ministries, has been given the opportunity of a lifetime – to attend Vanderbilt’s Kingdom Bible College. 
When the fundamentalist Christian sect falls on hard times, Esther looks for employment at a local health food store to supplement the group’s income.
At the store, Esther gets a chance to share her faith with her new manager, Gabriel, a devout skeptic and preacher’s kid, and his roommate, Mark, a college drop-out who finds Christian television to be great entertainment.
The friendship with Gabriel and Mark help Esther determine her human worth while helping her reframe her faith in a whole new light.

Shot entirely on location in Southern Indiana and Austin, Texas, Paradise Recovered attempts a modern-day retelling of the parable of the Good Samaritan while addressing hard questions involving faith, tolerance, and spiritual abuse in modern culture. 

Paradise Recovered Trailer from Storme Wood on Vimeo.

Common Emotional Difficulties After Leaving a High Demand Group

From Victims of Psychopaths Sociopaths

Posted on 07/21/11, 01:20 am I'm throwing this out here because as we all know the S and the N are a high demand group (party of 1).

Common Emotional Difficulties After Leaving a High Demand Group

The following emotional and psychological* difficulties are common with survivors from the Worldwide Church of God, Philadelphia Church of God and any totalistic splinter groups.

Not every survivor will experience all of these, or may suffer from additional ones. Experiencing any of this does not mean you are defective. In some cases these feelings may take years to subside, but it is important to realize that, while painful, they are common feelings with exiters. In time they will pass.

This list overlaps with Common Spiritual Difficulties After Leaving a High Demand Group.

 *Some psychosomatic symptoms are also listed.

• Enormous Feelings of Betrayal

• Feelings of Spiritual Rape of the Soul

• Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Trauma becomes crystallized a few days after a traumatic event, such as exiting an abusive, high demand group. Several of a cluster of symptoms can develop, including spontaneous crying, suicidal thoughts, emotional numbing, phobias, social withdrawal, flashbacks, amnesia, anxiety, depression, shame, guilt, self-loathing, fear of going insane.

• Anger or Rage
Toward the group and leader; toward oneself; suppression of anger in the group actually contributed to depression and a sense of helplessness.

• Denial

• Identity Confusion/Disorientation
The pre-cult personality--or real self--struggles with the in-cult personality1 that was imposed by the group. There can be difficulty integrating the cultic world with the outside world.

• Dissociation (or Dissociative Identity Disorder)
Not being in touch with reality or those around them; inability to communicate.

• Floating (a.k.a. trancing out)
Getting triggered into cult mode, flashbacks into the cult mind-set; thoughts of returning to the group, nostalgic feelings (part of dissociation).

• Panic and Anxiety Attacks

• Obsessive Thoughts

• Depression

• Psychosomatic Symptoms
Headache; stomach ache; backaches; fatigue; asthma; skin rashes; lethargy; sexuality problems.

• Problems or Inability in Making Decisions

Because of the dependency fostered by the group. 

 • Lack of Motivation

• Inability to Concentrate
With short-term memory loss.

• Fear
"What if I am wrong?" "What if harmful events actually do happen?" "I can't ever be happy outside the group." "What if I run into a present member?" Includes phobias and fear of going crazy.

• Grief & Sense of Loss
Grieving loss of innocence, idealism, spirituality, self, pride; sense of purpose, meaning and belonging in life; support system; friends and family lost in the group; loss of time, goals and youth.

• Guilt/Shame
For getting involved, for the people they recruited, things done while in the group; for leaving.

• Lack of Trust
Of group situations; deep suspicions about others motives and attitudes.

• Intense Loneliness
Strong and unique bonds were forged in the group.

• Sense of Purposelessness & Disconnection
Missing the peak experiences of the group.

• Sense of Isolation/Alienation
"No one can understand what I am going through."

• Overly Critical of Oneself and Others
Due to incorporating the harsh attitudes of the cult leader.

• Seeing Everything in Black and White
Cults do not teach to look for the gray areas.

• Problems Having Boundaries
Boundaries were violated time and again in the group until one lost sense of which boundaries were appropriate.

• Feelings of Inferiority and Worthlessness
Cult leaders continually blame members.

• Hypersensitive
To anger and rebuffs from others

• Sleep Disorders Including nightmares and insomnia.

• Eating Disorders

• Fear of Intimacy and Commitment

• Problems with Career or Employment
Because of years in the group; lost job opportunities, etc.

• Unable to Deal With Conflicts

• Impatience with Recovery

 By Douglas Becker

An Angry Reader Responds

From: juanwhoknows@_____.com
To: DenniscDiehl@aol.com
Sent: 2/10/2011 12:02:12 P.M. Eastern Standard Time
Subj: your hwa banned blog

I've been reading your 'anti-armstrong/no-god' blog for some weeks, following the UCG-COGaWa debacle, and since you're into highly original comments, here's one I bet you haven't heard (1000 times yet):

Psalms 14:1  ... The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.

This pretty much sums up your blog....foolish, bitter, myopic, predictable, rambling, and often typographically-challenged (lots of misspellings)....

Even with all the mutual 'crap' you've compiled from myriad other myopic self-promoting vilifiers, your personal scope of the entire HWA-WCG experience can never be more than very minuscule, personal and hopelessly arbitrary.

Even if what little you say about HWA and the WCG and splinters is basically true, the remaining 99.999% of the unfathomable experience goes completely unconsidered....so much for minimal accuracy (less than 0.001%) and objectivity. You should reconsider such a colossal blunder of short-sightedness; its as if you are STILL operating like a WCG minister.

To live a life of no hope (atheism) is miserable compared to an active life of FAITH.  When a believer is in trouble he cries out "O 'God,' help me!"  And when he is eventually saved, he is thankful.  What do you cry out?  "Oh God" or "G. D. it," I'm sure....because you can't completely wipe out the pre-programmed knowledge of the Creator from your mental ROM, can you? Because HWA didn't put THAT there.

Since no one will know that there is "god," until he sees him in the flesh or dies (no I didn't just contradict myself), a wise man chooses to believe in the Creator rather than not.  He reasons that the positive benefits of a life of FAITH greatly outweigh the crushing loneliness, purposelessness and bitterness that always accompany ATHEISM.  And if there turns out to be no 'god' in the end, it was still a greatly improved life. If there is 'god,' then the 'unprofitable servant' goes into an unimaginable bonus round.

Yet, so what if there's no reward after this life? If you're doing it for the reward, is that agape love? or, like all the self-seeking folks you describe in your blog, just for personal gain?  FAITH in the Creator is a worthwhile mindset even without the resurrection, pal.

The bottom-line question for me: is the m.o.of your blog really any better than that of the people whose actions you consistently paint as diabolical, stupid, and clueless?  Are you not doing the same thing that you did when you were a WCG minister? Then what a waste of time if you believe what you blog....

Because, like Job (another guy who thought he had this 'god thing' figured out), you might actually be WRONG about all this 'religion is big business' and 'the opium of the people' stuff.

For me, if a life of great joy, accomplishment, and worthwhile experiences, plus agony, long sadness, hard times and tragedy (most of which was my own fault) has not dimmed my faith in the Creator, how could your little toxic blip of a blog possibly hope to make a dent in anyone else's? 

If there is "god," you're still serving his purpose in another way without knowing it. If there is no "god," then you're still blogging about NOTHING after all these years and that every single day.

Again, what a waste of life....why not tell us about your stamp collection or how you felt when you first became a father?  Contributing something positive to the aggregate....

"A-dios!" whoops, sorry, "A-nihilos, amigo!"

_________________________________________________________________________________
FYI Juan:


I don't expect you or anyone else to agree with what is posted on this blog. One of the main problems with Armstrongism is that people checked their brains when they were baptized or whenever they read the latest booklet put out by one of the various "One and ONLY True Ministers of God left on earth today." 


The Armstrongite thought process only involves the 'revealed word of HWA, Meredith, Flurry, or some other leader who has interpreted the Bible according to THEIR viewpoint.  The members of these churches are expected to follow THEIR rulings and doctrines.  Reading other literature, theology books or writings done by non-COG members is frowned upon and blatantly forbidden by some.  Questioning is NOT an option in Armstrongism.  It wasn't under HWA at any point in time.  It still is not under Meredith, Flurry, Hulme, Pack, Cox, etc.


Real spiritual seekers continually ask questions, and have no problem in wrestling with scripture and doctrine   If you truly believe the Bible stories you read you would quickly see that many of  those men and women wrestled with, argued with and bargained with their God. You would see that more than 5 different writers contributed to Genesis.  That there were several authors to Isaiah, that many of the days and traditions kept by the Israelites were patterned after neighboring 'pagan' peoples, that James and Paul argued over who knew Jesus the best and how to interpret his word.  You would know that much of the Bible is myth and allegory. And, if you knew the meaning of myth and not today's meaning you would find value in these stories even though they aren't literal.  You would also know that the Bible tells the story of messy people, living messy lives who never quit got it right. It is not a story about people living lives of perfection or constantly having to DO the right thing.


I spent over 45 years in Armstrongism.  I was two when my mother joined and we drove 150 each way to church.  Grew up in the church, came to its Pasadena campus, worked for the church and even work in HWA's home for close to 15 years.  I can tell you stories that make anything posted here look like nursery rhymes.


I am not angry with the church.  There were some good times to be had.  I would never have traveled around the world like I have if it wasn't for the church.  However, there is regret for the lost and wasted years, the lost opportunities and a screwed up faith that was damaged by the cultish irrelvent nonsense of Herbert Armstrong and his minions.  I learned a long time ago to laugh and and have fun with the crap we all put up with.  That is the only way you can retain your sanity. Those of us that have recovered  from the filth now don't want to see others hurt by it.  So we post the silly happenings, the arrogant words, and  the lies of the various splinter cults and their leaders so it is all in black and white for the world to see.


Yet through it all, I never lost that spark that keeps me coming back to God.  That's why I am a lay minister in a local church, serve in numerous ways in the church and in the community.  I would much rather surround myself with agnostics, atheists and those that question their beliefs than those who are so mind numbingly close minded they refuse to use their brains.


I may not agree with everything Dennis writes, but the majority I do.  Those things that I don't agree with I look at as a new way of looking at things I had never thought about before.  I may not agree, but I do allow it to cause me to think.


Dennis is more than welcome to post there.  When he can jar the minds of those entrenched in the ethically and morally bankrupt churches of Armstrongism then he is welcome to post any damn time he wants.


This includes the other people that send me information too!


Gary

11 Step's To Spiritual Freedom

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jack-watts/recovering-from-religious-abuse_b_811710.html

"That's why Recovering from Religious Abuse has just been released by Simon & Schuster. Until now, there has been nothing that addresses the problem, while also offering a solution that helps the victims. Using an 11-step method, wounded Christians -- those who have been used, abused, and discarded by self-righteous religious leaders -- can reconnect with God in a healing, transforming way.

After being victimized, most wounded people lead half-lives, consumed with anger, bitterness, shame, and pain. They question whether the best years of their lives have already passed, hoping they haven't but suspecting that they have. They are prone to depression and acting-out behavior, which includes over eating, over spending, alcoholism, drug addiction, pornography and promiscuity.

Because such leaders call into question a person's relationship with God, this kind of abuse is particularly devastating emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. Such malicious castigation, which is internalized by the abused person as true, crushes the spirit of the recipient, and they retreat from the life they were living to follow the script of their destruction -- becoming a self-imposed prophecy. "

amen!
Dennis