Saturday, April 24, 2021

Church of God Faithful Has End-times Timeline Laid Out For You

 

Double click to enlarge so you can print it and tape it in your kitchen cupboard 
where the authorities will never think to look 
when they come to inspect your home for church literature.


Church of God Faithful is a splinter group of the Philadelphia Church of God cult. Formerly led by Bob Ardis, this little group has shrunk into oblivion when compared to the Philadelphia Church of God.

COGF claims it is the true Philadelphian era of the church while the PCG is the Laodicean era of the church. Both of these groups are running side by side, supposedly doing some kind of work. 

On December 8, 2022, one man from each church will rise up and become the two witless witnesses and will continue to preach to the world till May 20, 2026, then they will be killed and left on display in Jerusalem where they will be resurrected 3 1/2 days later.

One thing you can grant Armsgtrongism that it has the best mythologists in the history of the church. Never have we had such a collection of deluded men as we do in 2021, all vying to be the one true leader of the one true church and telling the most outrageous myths and lies ever. 

Petra is going to one of the biggest shitfests the church has ever seen. 1996 will pale in comparison when all of these self-appointed buffoons arrive all at once in Petra and claim they are in charge. Imagine them actually reaching a decision and appointing one man as the overall leader and then Bob Thiel trapeses in through the Siq and says, "Here I am, stand in awe! I am in charge now because I dreamed I was!"  Spittle and fists would start flying.

No LSD trip could ever be this wild!

LCG's Mind Boogling Number Of New Guests In Atlanta! Woo Hoo! Impressive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Living Church of God has published a few numbers about the mind-boggling number of subscribers they have attending their online Bible studies.

Before you look at the numbers below, remember that Atlanta is the 37th most populous city in the United States. The city serves as the cultural and economic center of the Atlanta metropolitan area, home to more than 6 million people and the ninth-largest metropolitan area in the nation.

6 million people are in the Atlanta metropolitan area. 6 million!

Now, look at the mind-boggling number of people checking out the most amazing ministry on the face of the earth today, after Bob Thiel, of course.

Also, note that LCG does not tell you how many of those "guests" were actually LCG members.



Atlanta, Georgia: Over the last couple of months, Mr. Dan Hall has conducted multiple online follow-up Bible studies after the original online TWP conducted for subscribers in the Atlanta area. Here are the encouraging numbers:
  • March 5: “The Signs of Christ’s Return” (Mr. J. McNair): 31 guests 
  • March 6: “Where Is the Church Christ Built?” (Mr. D. Hall): 22 guests (15 new, 7 repeat) 
  • March 12: “God’s Purpose for Mankind” (Mr. D. Hall): 13 guests (7 new, 6 repeat) 
  • March 19: “Are the Ten Commandments Done Away?” (Mr. D. Hall): 16 guests (7 new, 9 repeat) 
  • April 9: “Sabbath or Sunday: Which Is the Lord’s Day?” (Mr. D. Hall): 9 guests (all repeat)
  • April 16: “The Pathway to Hope: God’s Holy Days” (Mr. D. Hall): 14 guests (5 new, 9 repeat)

Friday, April 23, 2021

LCG: We are the Watchman, so stop focusing upon Jesus!



Dagnabbit Jesus! You came to save sinners and for some reason, people focus upon that instead of letting us scare the crap out of them with endless dreary news stories and false prophecies of doom and gloom.

The Role of a Watchman: Many churches today feel their mission is simply to tell the world that God loves them and that Jesus came to save sinners, which is an important but very incomplete message. Many churches also focus on having plenty of social activities to serve their members. However, Jesus told His disciples to be alert and watch for events that will mark the approaching end of the age and the return of Jesus Christ (Matthew 24; Mark 13; Luke 21). The events making news today—natural disasters, rumors of wars, spreading violence, global pandemics, moral corruption, and increasing evidence of the demise of the Israelite nations—are prophesied to appear at the same time we see the rise of a political power in Europe linked to the ancient Roman Empire and the emergence of adversarial powers in Asia and the Arab world. Just as God sent a series of prophets to warn the ancient nations of Israel and Judah that their ungodly ways would bring serious consequences, the Church of God has a similar role to function as a “watchman” to warn modern Israelite nations of the coming consequences of their sinful ways (Isaiah 58:1; Ezekiel 3:17; 33:2–7). Delivering this powerful warning message must also accompany the preaching of the Gospel of the coming Kingdom of God (Matthew 24:14). We need to stay focused on this God-given mission.
Have a profitable Sabbath,
Douglas S. Winnail