Saturday, May 14, 2016

LCG To Run "Training Camp" So Their Weak Men Can Be He-Men Again

With all of those pesky gays, effeminate liberals, and "graceite's" out there robbing the men of LCG of their masculinity, the church has finally decided to do something about it. They will be running a "training camp" for their men to become men again. We can be guaranteed that their standard bearer of masculinity will be Rod Meredith, Mr. Golden Gloves himself, a man's man. Sinless Rod.

Men will be trained to rule their households with rod's of iron.  Wives will need to submit and children tremble in their presence.  After all, authority is from the top down with women and children  are at the bottom of the heap.

If Jesus Christ is even mentioned at all during the entire "training camp", you can be guaranteed he will be pictured like this:

Northeast Men’s Training Camp 2016August 26-28​We live in a time of crisis for men. The role, identity and the very purpose for being a man is being called into question. How do we fight the demise of men... as a man? Here’s one way. Come and be part of this unique program this summer. Our spiritual “boot camp,” August 26-28, is specifically designed to build and strengthen men through eye-opening and interactive learning. We’ll learn what it takes to build bonds of brotherhood, serving God, our family and our brethren. It’s time to stand in the gap and take action against the tide of cultural correctness sweeping over our nation.


Redfox712 said...

"Cultural correctness"? Doesn't he mean political correctness?

Anonymous said...

"Men will be trained to rule their households with rod's of iron. Wives will need to submit and children tremble in their presence. After all, authority is from the top down with women and children are at the bottom of the heap."

But isn't this the way it is for all bronze-age middle-eastern war gods? Therefore, isn't that what has been ordained by Yahweh, bronze-age middle-eastern war god, be for everyone now too? How silly. Of course not.

Anonymous said...

As a recent former LCG member, I was told that at a previous NE men's retreat Johnathan McNair (who is the minister that organizes this retreat) stressed over and over and over again to "handle your women". This is a secondhand account but it was enough to turn my stomach. In my personal 10 year experience with LCG men, they are the most insecure, narcissistic group of babies. I can only imagine what a whole weekend of chest beating would be like.

Anonymous said...

"Come with me if you want to live". Ahnolt...yah..Ahnolt knows bettah about dees tings. Not dah gurlee mahn.

Anonymous said...

The Wanderer says

Real men..AND real women know it or life is a partnership of going with each other's strengths. This really smart girl(she actually has an IQ of 170...I think I'm a study subject for her...ha) I've been dating for over 30 years is the negotiator...diplomat..and someone I lean on when times (and when I get stupid) and we lean on each other. I have seen marriages in COGvages that are ruled by though they have no sense whatsoever. So much turmoil that I stopped attending Feasts with groups and wandered off on my own..tired of the bickering and tense situations...that I was in the middle of..uh. However, I am sure all are not like this but it just seems to be prevalent(did I use the right word??) in these groups.

Be good. Play nice. Hold hands and look both ways when you cross the street .

Anonymous said...

pump it up!

Connie Schmidt said...

Well , if Meredith quit cutting off all the male membership's testicles, that might help the program.

Anonymous said...

3.24 PM 'narcissistic group of babies'??? Well so are the women. Why do you think I have complained about women ignoring or abusing their dates. And then going to a daddy minister to bully the single men to take them out, at the mens expense of course.

Byker Bob said...

Binary thinkers generally attempt to impose the one size fits all mentality, rather than allowing the melding of the talents and personalities to establish a workable dynamic. All Jonathan McNair is going to accomplish by this retreat is to mess up these guys' sex lives. Women withold themselves when their desires are not considered and when their deep inner needs are not being met. Love and grace ensure that both partners remain emotionally engaged, as opposed to withdrawn and just phoning it in.


DennisCDiehl said...

Greetings Fellas but not girls. Our seminar will have several very special break out sessions.

1. Wrestle and Box your way to manliness. (Bring your favorite oils and a small loin cloth with which to gird them up with)

2. When and How to properly spank your wife and daughters (Boards of Education supplied)

3. Why the married and married with children should still take the advice of single , unmarriageable and childless Apostles in the New Testament very seriously

4. Arm wrestling and becoming the Strong Arm from right here to your family.

5. The Shocking Truth About Queer Men updated.

6. Developing a manly voice and presence (Special one time guest speaker: Dr. Robert Thiel)

7. The Missing Dementia in Sex

8. Leading her to call you Lord as long as she does well
8b. Just what do we mean "Does well?"

9. What sexual intimacies do God and Christ approve of and how would they know?

10.Real men flagellate I Corinthians 9:27 (This class is not for the nicey nicey!)

Anonymous said...

5:37 I only saw that scenario one time in LCG and quite frankly I felt bad for the girl. The guy was socially awkward at best and she agreed to the setup mostly because she felt she had to. I can't attest to what you are describing because I never saw that. On the contrary I saw very accomidating women because they felt they had no other choice. That is what I saw at LCG. Yes socially awkward, insecure narcissists would cover it.

James said...

My question is, will they be showing porno films at the boys retreat?

Anonymous said...

Does anyone have any
statistics on divorce rates in the cogs, are their marriages successful. I would like some honest data on that if anyone have such information please feel free to share, first hand experience could be helpful as well thank you.

Anonymous said...

REO Speedwagon's salute to the he man woman haters club. Tough Guys.

Byker Bob said...

Ah, yes, the tough guys! Kevin Cronin of REO once said that as a musician in high school, he was treated as a pussy. Suddenly, when the Beatles broke, the girls really flipped out over them, and musicians became a hot item. So Kevin's first band included some greasers and jocks who rigged up sections of their mothers' clotheslines between guitars they actually couldn't play, and Kevin's amplifier, and they mimed.


Anonymous said...

They should be more focused on teaching brotherly love, truthfulness, mercy, kindness, etc because they obviously don't have it together in these areas.

Worst Christian character of any church I have ever been in.

Anonymous said...

Is this where the men learn how to lord over others and how to get others to fear you?

Or maybe it's where they teach you how to be served instead of serving.

Or perhaps this is where LCG teaches "real men" how to narc on their friends and family members for having private Bible studies or disagreeing with sermons or doctrinal upgrades.

Wait, wait, wait... maybe this is where they teach men how to convince people that idolatry is actually okay, just so long as the person you're idolizing SAYS he is Christ's appointed leader on Earth.

I know, this must be where they teach men how to NEVER admit they are wrong and how to NEVER apologize when you mess up because to do so would be a sign of weakness.

Act now! Places are filling up fast!

Anonymous said...

Maybe Meredith can demonstrate to the LCG men how he used to wrestle in the Bermuda grass with Jimmy

Anonymous said...

8.32 AM Rather than the divorce rate, a more meaningful question is the quality within marriages. In my experience, friendships and hence marriages, are skin deep. A slight provocation, even a civil complaint, can result in the loss of a 'friend.' It's like the fig tree that Christ approached, it looked good from afar, but had no fruit on it. Sham friendships, and sham marriages.

Monnie said...

To Anonymous's 9:33am comment: You hit the nail on the head. As one of several people I know or used to know who stopped attending services and experienced the instantaneous freezing out of church relationships, I can attest to the superficiality of most COG relationships.

Anonymous said...

Man training LCG style will surely include teaching the men that women are the weaker vessel. Therefore, if you ever need to interrogate members, it's best to go to the woman while the man is at work and prey on her emotions by tearing her down, scaring her and subtly threatening her into revealing the inner most thoughts which you can then use at some later point (up to years later if need be) to launch an assault against her and her family.

This is a McNair super-specialty.

The sanctity of marriage is far less important than loyalty to LCG.

McNair won't hesitate to tell a woman that it might be better for her to leave her husband (or threaten to do so) in order to manipulate him into becoming more loyal to LCG insanity.

It's a double-edged sword. These manipulating woman who have been duped by their ministers threaten to leave their husbands who might have issues with the rampant abuses in LCG. The husbands don't want to lose their families so they cower down and submit to the wife. Then LCG is left with a bunch of emasculated men so they have to go to man training camp. It's insane.

Anonymous said...

I feel sorry for the wives of Jonathon McNair and Rod McNair. It would be a total nightmare to be married to either of them.

Anonymous said...

If you aren't in LCG, you won't have friends in LCG. It's a cult. They keep to themselves. If you aren't with them, you might try to dissuade the member so you are dangerous and contact should be minimized.

Anonymous said...

That OP "musclebound Jesus" picture of JC breaking from the cross is very funny!

I know of kooks in Christian militias who would not only like that picture, but also like this one.

These gun-fondlers believe the nutty quasi-preachers and right-wing extremists who say the Second Amendment is about being able to have guns to attack and overthrow the US government when someone like President Obama is in office.

Such a stance is actually not too far from Armstrongism, and for some, it's been a next step (however nutso)!

Monnie said...

"Attack & overthrow" the government is a bit of a straw man. However, the purpose of the Second Amendment as discussed quite openly by the Founders was and is to ensure that Americans possessed the means to deter a government which might otherwise become abusive; and, if deterrence failed, the means to overthrow such a government by force if necessary. It was King George's army's march to capture the colonials' weapons & ammunition which precipitated the first battle of the Revolutionary War. What in the world do you think this has to do with LCG's perverse view of the sexes or marriage, or with the muscle-bound Jesus depicted on the cross?

Retired Prof said...

Anon at 9:04, that picture you linked to showing Jesus shooting a pistol shows something odd. Jesus is shooting right-handed but aiming with his left eye. My son is like that--right-handed but left-eye dominant. The shared trait worries me deeply, especially since my son's beard grows in a similar pattern.

Jesus died a horrible death at the age of 33.5 years. Since my son has recently turned 33 years old, I've just sent him an e-mail to warn him that for the next several months he must not commit any miracles like turning water into wine or raising the dead--and certainly he should avoid claiming to be the Messianic king of Hennepin County, MN, and adjoining jurisdictions. If he can just hold out till his next birthday, I trust the danger of crucifixion will have passed.

Anonymous said...

Spooky! The devil is in the details, I guess.

"Training Camp for the Power Mad"
Where you can learn to be just like god's rod too, Rod Meredith.

Military show is Blastin' off to Kosovo.
Military show with lightning speed.
Sensitivity? Oh, just a rusty nail in the corporate show.
How many stabs before we bleed?

Those Pinocchios chattering out in stereo,
boy Pinnocchio and his golden deed.
Masculinity? Oh, galvanized in the world wide show
as we fertilise the seed.

Power mad, I didn't chop the tree down dad
I only try to do what's right.
Power man, the best friend that you ever had
unless of course you choose to fight.

Power mad, driving out of the shadows,
he never tires when he plays.
Power mad, he's a streak in the night time
speculating how he'll take on the world some day.

Power mad, I didn't drop my pants down dad,
I know my left hand from my right.
Power man, the best friend that you ever had
unless of course you lose the fight.

Byker Bob said...

It's best to test for eye dominance, or mixed eye dominance when bowling, or at the shooting range. With mixed eye dominance, this can actually change from day to day. Point your index finger directly at a fixed object with both eyes open. Close one eye, open it, and then close the other. Your finger is going to move off target when you open your non-dominant eye, and close the dominant one. Some people are right handed, but left eye dominant. In cases where accuracy is concerned, it is important to know of this condition.


Anonymous said...

As an ex-LCG member, when I look at the image above this story, I can see most current LCG members disregarding the story entirely but focusing on the fact that Jesus is on a "cross". LCG thinks it was a stake, not a cross. So, following their bizarre brand of reasoning, the entire story should be dismissed because of this one random incorrect (per RCM) component.

Anonymous said...

I know a guy.
He had an eye dominance problem. Sometimes left, and sometimes right.
Long story short, he joined a Christian militia because of what a Christian redneck skinhead preacher taught him while in jail.
After he got out of the joint, he received healing at a Christian megachurch and now has "pure right" dominance.
The nice thing is that now, when he attends his "overthrow the government and/or shoot illegals" Christian militia gun meetings, he only has to cut one hole out of the pointy white hood that he wears.
It saves 50% wear and tear on his scissors; Praise Jesus!

Anonymous said...

Eye dominance can be changed.

Byker Bob said...

12:52, correctimundo! As any martial artist can attest, you can also equalize or suspend the effects of brain hemisphere dominance for certain purposes. It just requires practice and technique.