Questions That We the 99% Sheep Wish To Have Answered By
Dave the 1% Pack
For decades, COG Sheep sat in service after
service hearing announcement after announcement about the great breakthroughs,
opportunities and projects that the Armstrongs had in mind without accounting
for how they would be paid for and by whom.
Those days are over.
No longer will we just sit quietly and wonder if
this is really such a great idea or plan.
No longer will we neither nod yes or no as
we sit listening to the grand schemes of one man who simply has to use our
contributions to achieve his visions and dreams.
No longer will we pretend to be inspired by God's
amazing decisions when we think they might just be the decisions of those who
refuse to ask us what to do with our money.
No longer will we believe that once we give our
hard earned monies, it is no longer our business what is done with it for or by
God, Christ, Jesus and our small church.
No longer will we be intimidated by your Biblical
quotations about keeping our mouths shut and our bank accounts open.
No longer will we act inspired when we are really
skeptical
No longer will we allow you to speak doublespeak
about time is short while watching buildings meant to last forever being built
at our expense.
Pack's New Mini-Me Auditorium
Therefore Dave...we'll call you Mr. Pack
when and if we choose, not you, please give us a reasonable answer to the
following...
1. Knowing that the local Pasadena Community
was never all that impressed by the Church and the Church and "the truth" had
little effect on them by listening to concerts, why do you think this doesn't
work idea will work for out good now?
2. Please explain how you can pretend to
know time is short and yet spend our monies on permanent buildings and only now
just start a college that will take years to mean anything to
anyone?
3. Please explain why Herbert Armstrong did,
small college in one room, small college in one building, two dorms, a
place to eat, offices and then an auditorium, while you start with a huge
Auditorium (for what..just church?), huge office building for a small staff and
yourself, and then a class room for students. Why are you
doing it backwards to your hero HWA?
4. EXACTLY how much is this going to cost US
and over what period of time?
5. EXACTLY how many baptized members do we
actually have in our amazing Church? It embarrassing to belong to a small
church and not be able to answer the questions as to how many of us there really
are.
6. Why are so many family members on the Church
payroll. Is this a family venture as seen in both the Armstrongs and
Tkaches? Do you remember the drama and mistake that all seemed to
be?
7. When you die, do we ministers that are
alive and remain, have a retirement?
8. Are we to assume your seriously under
trained and untrained family members will lead us all into the kingdom?
Can we decide we'd rather have someone else?
9. If we stipulate our tithes and offerings
are NOT to be used for Time is Short Construction, can we stay in the
church?
10. Why do you always tease us with, "....but I
can't tell you that now," when what you are up to might be something we'd prefer
not to fund or participate in? Are you like Paul who told us he went
to the The Third Heaven and heard stuff no man, but him of course, could
hear or see or tell about, so don't ask? If we think that is a bit
of the lame "I know something you don't know," stuff, will you get mad at
us/
11. If we snicker when you sermonize about where
we are in prophecy and the time left kinda matches the time you might have left,
will we have to be the ones that have to bring a watermelon to the
picnic?
12. Can we sit in on the meetings you will be
having about how this is all going to be paid for with our money? While we
realize "not many wise men now are called," some are, and may wish to know
exactly what you alone are deciding for us and give some input into the wisdom
or lack thereof in these plans?
13. Will you shake your jowls at us like HWA did
when he got really angry? Do you have jowls yet? Can a COG Apostle
even be an Apostle without jowls?
14. In time will we have to refer to you as
DCP or Mr. DCP as we did to HWA or Mr. HWA? You just don't have the
same ring to your initials. Sounds more like an illegal drug than an
Apostle. You know like, "Oh man, I'm flyin' high on
DCP."
15. Could you consider noting we have "the largest
online copied theological website on the
Internet?"
16. Once we become a household word throughout all
the world of Christianity and all things Pagan, could you put the name "Jesus"
in a sermon once in awhile?
17. Would you consider using the New Testament at
times in your sermons, studies and to inform us all as to where we are in Bible
History?
18. Could you show us some credentials as to where
you learned the background, history, language, culture, politic , and origins of
the Bible, besides from you know where?
19. Would you get a chuckle out of it all if once
in awhile I came up to you and said, "that was the most dumb ass sermon I have
ever heard. I don't think I have heard a sermon quite like that before,
and hope to never hear one again"?
20. Could you stop saying "it's not about the
numbers," when we all know it exactly is all about the
numbers?
21. Have you ever had a personality profile done
and would you share it with us? Would you consider some mental health
testing so we can relax a bit at times when you say some of the things you say
about yourself in sermons and such? Could you give just one sermon without
the pronoun "I"? Just askin....
Well, that should be enough for now. We
anxiously await your answers. What? What do you mean I'm
disfellowshipped!!! Hey, hey...I was just .....doh!