The Truth Shall Make You Free: Chapter 12 - Armstrong's Fear of Rader

Chapter 12 Armstrong’s Fear of Rader

(pg 169) During the month of December, while various individuals involved in the lawsuit were buy gathering information and preparing for when the suit would be filed, there were things taking place behind the scenes in Pasadena that few were aware of.

On December 4^th, while Wayne Cole was out to lunch, his secretary took a call from Garner Ted Armstrong. His message was: “Mike Wallace has been hounding me to death; he wants me to go on 60 Minutes. I don’t want to go on and I desperately need to talk to my father about it. Wayne Cole is the only man who can get through to my father.  Please have him call me about this.”  Cole, on receiving this message, felt that he should not call Garner Ted back without first discussing it with Herbert Armstrong.

That same afternoon, he called Armstrong at his home in Tucson.  Cole informed Armstrong of Garner Ted’s call and said: “I felt I should ask you counsel before speaking to Ted or if you even want me to speak to him at all.”  He then went on to relay the entire message regarding Mike Wallace’s persistent efforts to get Garner Ted to appear on a 60 Minutes program.  The specter of his son discussing his ouster on national television apparently was sufficient to convince Armstrong that there should be a dialogue between him and his son and he asked Wayne Cole to be a go between.  He said” “Wayne, I want to give Ted the following message: ‘Ted, I had to do what I did to get the Church back on the (pg 170) track.  It was not a personal attack against you, but I could not let the Church and the college continue to go the way they were going. If you, Ted, will admit that you were wrong in the way that you left us and all you have done, I would be happy to see you back in the Church.  I love you Ted, very much and do not wish to get between you and God and harm your eternal salvation.’”

After discussing further potential unpleasant and perhaps disastrous effects of Garner Ted discussing Church and family problems on national television, Armstrong said to Cole, “Wayne, I’m staying alive by sheer determination and struggle.  I have felt that I need to live to get this straightened out. It would be very easy to sit down and relax, stop struggling and it would not be very long.  I do not think I could be replaced.”

Cole interrupted, “Mr. Armstrong, there should never be any thought of replacing of anyone replacing you.  God has preserved your life and we hope and pray he will allow you to life to finish this Work and be here when Christ returns.”

Armstrong then continued, “But if He doesn’t allow me to remain that long and I have been replaced, I guess it will be up to you, Wayne, to try.”

Whether Armstrong really meant what he said was open to question, as he had often made the same statements to many other leading ministers in the Church.  And even if he felt that way, would it be his decision?  Further events would show that more clearly.

The next day, a call came from Garner Ted.  Cole told him that he had spoken to his father and that he was asked to be a go between in this father-son estrangement. He told Garner Ted that he had a message for him from his father. Garner Ted replied, “How fine. I have a message for my father also, but first let me hear the one he has for me.”  After hearing the message, Garner Ted said: “That’s pretty hard for me to believe to think that he actually believes that he could get between me and God and harm my eternal salvation. I ‘m absolutely horrified at the things he’s been saying about me, comparing me to Jim Jones and inferring that I could lead people off to such tragic end as he did to those people down in Guyana.  I’ll say one thing, though. If my father were to announce that now is the time to sell everything and flee to the place of safety, I wouldn’t be surprised if half the people in the Church would do just that. Give my father all of their money, show up wherever he told them to be, and go off with him to Petra.”

(pg 171) It was evident that Garner Ted was not about to return to the Worldwide Church under conditions that his father had established.  Yet in spite of the fact that he had started the Church of God International, he so fervently wanted to reconcile with his father.  One would wonder if he would have gone back and if so under what conditions and what type of compromise.

After hearing his father’s message and discussing the belief that each thought that the other could lead a group of people off into the wilderness as Jim Jones, he was right with his message for his father.  He said: “Wayne, I want you to give my father the following message. ‘Mike Wallace has called me repeatedly.  On two occasions I have talked with him for approximately three hours.  They have already done their homework and may do a show on the Worldwide Church whether or not I cooperate with them; Mike Wallace has called me an S.O.B. for not already saying I will appear on the show.  I don’t really want to go on 60 Minutes, but unless I hear from my dad then Dottie (Garner Ted’s sister) and I am going to go on the program.  Whatever we’ve had to bear because of my moral problems was absolutely nothing compared to what me and others in the family had borne down through the years because of my father’.”  With a promise from Cole to do whatever he could to urge Herbert Armstrong to call his son, the phone call was concluded.

On the same day, Cole called Herbert Armstrong in Tucson.  Cole conveyed Garner Ted’s message to his father, and Armstrong was quite noticeably affected in an emotional way by the message. He voiced considerable concern as to what his daughter Dottie might want to say on 60 Minutes. Armstrong then said that he was going to call his son and that concluded the conversation with Cole.

One may wonder why there was a concern about what his daughter Dottie might say. She was not a member of the Church, but did receive assistance from the Church, which she considered inadequate, in view of the fact that her husband Vern Mattson had served faithfully as an executive during the early years of the Church.  Perhaps she would say some of the things that she had said to others. She wondered when her father was going to get rid of Stanley Radar and stop him from destroying the Church. She would tell of times when her father‘s phone numbers were being changed and she, his own daughter, wasn’t able to call him for long periods of time. She would tell of those lengthy periods of time (pg 172) when she never heard from her father. She would tell how, when she attempted to make him see how terribly wrong he was ion both the way he treated his son and the way he was so trusting of Rader, he would get angry, refuse to continue the discussion, and hang up on her. Finally, she would say, “I hate to say it, but all these years the only one my father has cared for is himself.  That’s really all that counts to him, just himself.  He’s never really cared about the family.  He doesn’t give a ---- about us and never has.”

This is part of the story that Dottie Mattson would tearfully tell to the world about her father, God’s apostle. With all of the wrong in the Worldwide Church of God, the family tragedy is rally the worst part of it, especially in light of the fact that Herbert Armstrong has often said that the Worldwide Church of God is the fulfillment of the prophecy in Malachi 4 Verse 5 and  6.  He claims that his preaching is the spiritual fulfillment of that prophecy which states: “Behold, I send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord: And he shall turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hear of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.”  The Church was to be a fulfillment of that prophecy, but had failed, and was being smitten with a curse.

Five days went by before there was any further contact between Cole and Armstrong. On December 10^th, Herbert Armstrong called Wayne Cole.  It tuned out that he had never attempted to contact his son and wanted further clarification on what Garner Ted hoped could be accomplished by a call from him.  Cole then told him that it was Garner Ted’s desire that the two of them reach an agreement whereby Armstrong would cease attacking his son constantly or else Garner Ted and Dottie were going to cooperate with Mike Wallace and appear on 60 Minutes.

Armstrong then said, “Has Ted given any indication of the hope of coming back into the Church?”

Cole replied, “No, he hasn’t.  He merely wants to discuss a means of stopping the constant charges and allegations against him or else, 60 Minutes.”

Armstrong then responded, “I will answer him with silence.”

Armstrong was not convinced that Mike Wallace wanted Garner Ted to appear on his program, but thought instead that his son was attempting to convince Mike Wallace to put him on.  One can only understand Armstrong’s reversal and his decision to call his son by (pg 173) realizing who advised him in this matter. Armstrong said:  “Satan tells me that he has spoken to officials in CBS headquarters and was given assurances that there would be no comments made on their network slanderous against me or the Work.  Why, CBS has even shown interest in purchasing Quest Magazine.”  Armstrong had become convinced that there would be no 60 Minutes program on the Church and, with that fear removed, no longer saw any need to effect any reconciliation with his son.

Though all of this, however, Armstrong was becoming more and more cognizant of the fact that radar’s hold on him was getting progressively tighter. The conversation then took a sudden turn away from Garner Ted, and totally surprising Cole, he said: “Wayne, I do have a problem which I would like to discuss with you in the strictest confidence.  Every time I speak to anyone Stan Rader always wants to follow me and speak as well.  I have been told that many of our members do not appreciate this practice, and don’t know what to do about it. He always writes out his own notes and pretty well reads from them in making his comments.  Stan is a very brilliant man in many ways, but he certainly is not an effective speaker or preacher. He has plenty of opportunity to speak and if God were calling him into the ministry, we would have seen his development long before now.”

With a comment such as this coming from Herbert Armstrong, Rader’s motives and ultimate goal were quite apparent.  Armstrong then continued outlining a list of complaints the he had about Rader and Rader’s constant attempts to move into the limelight and place himself in a position of authority before the people.

Armstrong continued, “If I say anything to Stan, even very gently, about his problem, he flies into a rage and screams at me.  He is very sensitive about this. He gets into such a rage that he is opening himself up for a demon at these times.”

Armstrong indicated that he didn’t have the courage to deal with this matter directly and wanted some backup support. He suggested that Cole have the ministry write letters to him indicating their criticism of Rader.  Cole told Armstrong eh thought such a maneuver would not work.  If such a think were done and should Armstrong then change his mind about dealing with the Rader problem, it was obvious that any minister who would have written such a letter would be on the purge list.  The conversation ended with no conclusion having been reached on the Rader problem.  Cole wished (pg 174) him well on his coming trip to Jerusalem.

Armstrong’s trip to Jerusalem was to be his first trip out of the country since his illness the previous year.  He was finally going for the delayed dedication of the Children’s Playground at Liberty Bell Park. Armstrong met with President Navon, Prime Minister Begin, Mayor Teddy Kollek and other top officials.  The Children’s Playground had been sponsored by AICF; in other words, it was essentially paid for with Worldwide Church of God money.  Even though this money was given for the preaching of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, Herbert Armstrong has never taken the chance of offending the Israeli leaders by preaching the Gospel or mentioning the name of Christ.  He was more interested in being known by one of his other self-proclaimed titles, “Ambassador for World Peace.”  Quiet a contrast to the apostle Paul who wrote in Ephesians 6:20 regarding his approach to preaching the gospel: “For which I am an ambassador in bonds that therein I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.”  The apostle Paul; was willing to be throw in jail and actually had been imprisoned many times for boldly speaking the Gospel of Jesus Christ. But Herbert Armstrong was more impressed by the opportunity to be honored personally. He had a dinner in his honor, the inauguration was in his honor, and his name was engraved on the name plaque at the entrance to the park.  There was a special program honoring Herbert Armstrong at the ICCY (International Cultural Center For Youth), which is an organization funded by Eleanor Roosevelt and Moshe Koi, Minister of Tourism.  This organization is for the purpose of promoting better relations between Israeli and Arab youth and is almost wholly supported by Ambassador College and the AICF. In other words, supported by the tithe-paying members in the Worldwide Church of God. The Gospel is not preached to these youth, however. Armstrong was proud to have a name plaque placed on a stone marker at the square to the ICCY Building, announcing that it was to be called The Herbert W. Armstrong Square.

Upon conclusion of his visit it Israel, Armstrong and Rader went to London. They arrived early in the week, with Armstrong planning to speak that following Sabbath, December 23^rd, at a special service at the Bricket Wood Campus.  Members were coming in on special buses from various parts of Britain to hear his special sermon.  This was to be the last service at Bricket Wood prior to the vacating of the premises completely.

(pg 175) On December 21^st, Frank Brown, who at this time was Director of the Church affairs in Britain, drove into London to meet Armsrong and Rader at their hotel for breakfast.  On arriving there he was shocked to be told by the chauffer that the entire party had rushed off to the airport and left on the Gulfstream II to return to the States.

Gordon Muir had received word of this sudden departure from a friend of his who was employed at the printing facilities by the Church in England.  Gordon called me with great concern.

He said, “I’m afraid Armstrong and Rader may know about the lawsuit.  I can’t think of any other reason why they would be returning to the States so suddenly.  Somehow the word seems to be out over in England and Frank Brown seems to know about the lawsuit.  Jack Martin has found out from someone else over there that Frank Brown knows about the lawsuit and also knows that I was to the Feast in Jekyll Island and he actually asked Jack what he knows, if anything, about the California attorney general.”

We were panic-stricken.  With rumors all over Pasadena, none of them accurate but all of them in one way or another having their original root in the truth, we were fearful that Rader may be able to take some action to render our efforts ineffective.  At this time we didn’t know of any of the things that had been taking place between Cole and Armstrong.

That same day, Frank Brown called Wayne Cole’s home and told Cole’s wife about Armstrong’s sudden departure.  He also then told her that he had heard about a lawsuit.  Cole thought that he would certainly hear from Armstrong upon his return, for such a sudden change in plans must have been for a very important reason.  Yet by December 26^th, Cole had not yet heard from Armstrong, so he decided to call him and welcome him home. Strangely enough, in that conversation Armstrong gave no reason for his sudden early return.  He bragged on for some length about his visit, his meetings, his dinner, and all of the important people he had met.  Then he said that now that he had seen Begin, he was planning to see Sadat in Cairo in February and then in April was planning to go to Japan.

Coming events were soon to cause him to cancel his trip to Cairo and postpone his trip to Japan.  It does seem very strange, however, that Armstrong would constantly make this three point circuit, (pg 176) Israel, Egypt and Japan.  Many of his trips to these countries seemed to coincide with a time that negotiations may have been going at higher diplomatic levels regarding the Arab/Israel peace initiatives, energy problems, etc.  Could there be something more than meets the eye?

Cole continued his conversation with Armstrong, telling him about the continued and increasing concern on the part of many ministers and members regarding Rader.  Armstrong replied, “I’m afraid so, that’s a problem to me Wayne, and I want to talk privately to you about it.”  Armstrong then said that Rader wanted to bring lawsuits against Garner Ted and also that he wanted to disfellowship John Schroeder, an employee in Britain who said that he had heard rumors about a lawsuit and about Rader, but refused to disclose the source of the rumor.

Of significance here is the fact that Armsrong made no mention of their early return or the reason for it, and was complaining about Rader.  This conversation, of course, proves that Armstrong or at least Rader, knew about the lawsuit rumor, and it would also indicate that Rader sensed urgency to return.  He apparently felt that it was important to return to Pasadena to nail down the source of the rumor that John Schroeder had heard.  He was to be unsuccessful and remained unprepared for the events soon to occur.  The fact that Rader, who was not a minister, felt that he could even suggest removal of someone from the Church to Herbert Armstrong would indicate the true position of power this man actually holds.

Armstrong, continuing on the subject or Rader, then said, “It’s quite a problem because he keeps boring in all the time.  He is one who can just lose his temper and fly into a rage, and I don’t want to upset him.  When he gets angry with me he threatens to bring lawsuits against the Church.  He says that he will tell the world what he knows.  I don’t know what he knows, I don’t know what he can do to harm the Work, but that’s what he said he will do.”

Discussing the matter further Cole said, “My concern is that he is in too prominent a position in the leadership in the Work and that seems to be the biggest concern we have coming in.”

Armstrong interrupted, “That’s right, and he is deliberately trying to put himself there.  I don’t know.  I don’t want to think that anyone has their eyes on 50, 60, 70 million dollars a year, but that is quite a magnet, you know.”

(pg 177) Armstrong then continued voicing his concern for Rader’s constant desire to continue the public dispute with Garner Ted.  Armstrong referred to Garner Ted’s public allegations that his wife Ramona had been giving sexual favors to Rader and to other men, and said that he felt the best answer for that was one of silence.

At the very same time that we were about to file our lawsuit in the hopes of saving the Church from total destruction through corruption and self-dealing, Armstrong was on the verge of alt least partially removing what he considered to be the main source of the problem. , Stanley Rader.  Through the evening of December 26^th, Cole prepared a lengthy letter outlining all of the concerns throughout the Church regarding Rader.  The following day, he discussed it with Dr. Herman Hoeh, one of the evangelists and a professor at Ambassador College.  Hoeh indicated that Cole’s response to Armstrong regarding Rader was in order, and appeared to agree with it.

On December 28^th, Cole flew to Tucson to meet with Herbert Armstrong and hand over his letter to him.  The letter was a written confirmation of all the facts that they had discussed on their previous phone conversations.  After reading the letter Armstrong said, ‘Wayne, I don’t believe that Stan is really converted enough to understand the love that you have expressed for the Church in your letter. He is the most powerful person in the Work right now.  He only speaks from the position he occupies, but also speaks with my authority which he uses as he wishes. Why, he even uses my underground garage and private elevator to the office, and I don’t like that.”

One may wonder if Armstrong is truly concerned about Rader’s honesty and integrity or if his anger was caused more by Rader’s presumptuous use of Armstrong’s exclusive facilities.

Armstrong continued to Cole, “Yes, Wayne, I know that I must remove Stan from all executive and administrative responsibility. He’s giving the impression that he’s trying to take over the Work. I must do something to stop that.”

Having heard more rumors about a lawsuit, Cole thought that he should bring up the subject. He told Armstrong that he had heard sufficient rumors from various sources to believe that there may be some substance to them. He said, however, that according to Ralph Helge, a member of the Church and law partner of Stanly Rader’s, such rumors were just rumors with no basis in fact as there (pg 178) there was no way any kind of lawsuit could be brought against the Church.  Of course, some of the rumors that Cole had to go on were a result of the delicate spoon-feeding of information that he had been receiving from Robert Kuhn so that it would not be a total shock to him when it occurred.  In spite of the fact that this entire matter between Cole and Armstrong was for the purpose of discussing the removal of Rader from executive and administrative positions, Armstrong’s first reaction was, “I’m going to have to talk to Stan about this.”

Would Armstrong really be able to release himself from Rader when at the first signs of alarm, his immediate reaction would be to “call Stan”?  Armstrong wanted to know what kind of claim the suit was going mention, and in spite of the fact Cole really didn’t know, Armstrong continued to press on that point.  Cole then mentioned one rumor that he had heard regarding the fact that Rader on a trip to Monte Carlo rented a large yacht at a cost of $3,000 per day for several days.  All of this was paid for by the Church.  Armstrong remembered such a yacht and that he in fact had had a cruise on it and also had diner aboard.  Armstrong and Cole prayed about the entire situation and then Cole left to Armstrong’s parting words: “Wayne, if you see Stan taking over the Work, I will expect that you will stand up and fight.”

The next day Armstrong phoned Cole and wanted to know more about the possibility of a lawsuit being filed over yacht expenses.  He was very disturbed about such a possibility.  Armstrong said, “I remember we rented a bog boat, a two-story boat with a full crew, on board.  Ramona, Stan and others spent more time aboard than I did.  Maybe if that is going to be a problem, I should reimburse the Work for expenses of the yacht.”  Cole indicated that he didn’t think it was necessary and should not react to rumor, so Armstrong did not send any check in.

It’s interesting to note that Armstrong was fully aware that the yacht was used only for personal purposes, strictly pleasure, and was willing to reimburse the Church for the $30,000 only if it were the source of the problem.  As long as it seemed there would be no problem over such an expenditure, he appeared to have no guilt about not reimbursing the Church for the expense.

At about this same time, I had heard that there was a possibility (pg 179) that Armstrong might be successful in removing Rader from his position of prominence.  There was the possibility, I was told, that Rader would be put on the AICF payroll and that he would remain advisor to Herbert Armstrong, but have no executive duties in the Church.

In discussing this with Gordon Muir, Gordon said, “Maybe you should not have bothered with the lawsuit.  It looks like everything may be getting taken care of anyway.”  We discussed it somewhat and finally agreed that just the presence of Rader, no matter what his official position, was still dangerous. To have in a position of lower authority, as a sop to the members and ministers who were complaining about him, could actually make him more dangerous.  In such a position, he would not be recognized as one having any official authority, yet he would still have his influence and control over Herbert Armstrong, though not in an obvious way.  I felt confident that no matter what, we had to proceed, and in fact even if we didn’t want to proceed, as the entire situation was in the hands of the Attorney General’s office.  As each day went by, we were anxiously awaiting word as to when the suit would be actually filed.  Each day seemed to bring the words, “Maybe tomorrow.”

On January 2, 1979 Cole received a call at his office from Armstrong, who asked him to go to a private phone and call him back.  Armstrong said, ‘I don’t want this call to be overheard by eavesdroppers”.  Although Church officials were later to deny that phones were tapped at Church headquarters, Armstrong’s very own comment in that regard and his concern for privacy would indicate that he was quite aware that the phones were not private.  Armstrong then said that he had written a letter to Rader, and proceeded to read it to Cole.  In the letter he outlined to Rader the concern that many have about Rader trying to take over the Church.  He said, “But you are pushing yourself to take over.  People do look at you as an attorney, experienced in finance, etc., but not as a minister and shepherd over God’s people.  So what I propose is that you resign from the administrative positions in the Church and college, but continue in the AICF and as a personal assistant and advisor to me.”

Armstrong then asked Cole if he knew what Rader’s salary was, to which Cole responded, “No, I’ve heard rumors but I don’t really know what the figure is.”  Armstrong didn’t reply directly at the (pg 180)

Time, but went on to state that he thought it was best to have Rader retained as financial and legal advisor to the Church at a figure of $75,000 a year, plus fees and additional services, and then put Rader on the payroll of the AICF at a $100,000 a year.  Armstrong then said, “That’s the total of what he gets in salary.”  Armstrong then went on to explain that the $100,000 salary from AICF could be kept confidential and that no one need know anything about it.  Armstrong said to Cole, “Keep this quiet, as I want it to be as though Stan volunteered to resign.  I don’t want it to be known that he actually triggered it.  If Stan doesn’t volunteer, then I will force it.  There’s no turning back now.”

Armstrong then went into a discussion about changes in membership of the Board of Directors.  He mentioned the names of some individuals that he would remove and others that he would install on the board.  He said, “I can put people on and off the board as I wish.  It’s really been a dummy board up to now.”  In making this statement, he confirmed what Robert Kuhn had told us at the offices of Cohn and Lifland earlier and also confirmed what the organization was operating in violation of the law under which it was chartered which calls for an elected board.

While these calls between Armstrong and Cole were taking place, we were becoming very uneasy wondering when the complaint would be filed.  It seemed that as we drew toward the end of the year, each day the story from Chodos was that it would be another day or so. We just hoped and prayed that the suit would be filed before anyone would be able to confirm the rumors of the impending action.  Earl Timmons had been telling me that Chodos was going to let him know in advance in order that Earl may show the court officials locations of various offices at Church headquarters.  This would be necessary, as the Attorney General was going to attempt to have a judge rule in favor of an ex parte receivership.  A receivership of this type is one that is imposed without any advance notice to the parties involved.  This was an important factor as it was felt that should any advance notice be given to the defendants, they would have time to shred and dispose of sensitive documents and evidence.  We were on pins and needles waiting day by day, moment by moment.

The Truth Shall Make You Free: Chapter 9 Excerpts

 

Chapter 9   On The Track or Off The Track?

(pg 113) While Paula and I were going through these personal experiences in our church life, many other things had been happening.  Strangely, or perhaps not so strangely in spite of Herbert Armstrong’s forceful directive to Stanley Rader to sell or get rid of Quest, Rader was increasing his control over Quest with no apparent intent to sell it.

On July 12, Roger Lippross, Circulation and Publishing Director of The Plain Truth magazine, announced to employees in Pasadena that Stanley Rader had placed Quest under his personal control in the AICF.  At about the same time, Rader made swift moves to remove all Church employees from their positions at the Quest offices in New York.  In addition to Jack Martin, several other Church employees had earlier transferred to the Quest offices from California. The group included Gordon Muir, who was slated to take over as circulation manager.  The Church employees were now given less than a week to phase out and leave the offices.  The reason given by Rader was that it would be easier to sell Quest if it were a self-sustaining operation without Church employees on the staff.  The true reason behind Rader’s actions, however, seems to be somewhat different.  With no one from the Church on the scene, Rader could then mold Quest and the newly established Everest House publishing operations to his liking and use them to his purpose.

(pg 114) The importance of a secular publishing business owned by the Church could better be understood in light of a remark that Robert Kuhn, executive assistant to Garner Ted Armstrong and a Church vice-president, made at the 1978 ministerial conference. He said, “Quest was very important to the Church, as through the publishing contacts maintained by the Quest office, adverse publicity in the press could be controlled.”  One must wonder that even if it were possible to influence the press in such a way, why would a Church want to do so.  It would appear that the only influence a church would desire over the press would be one whereby its evangelistic message would be disseminated through the news media.

Perhaps the fall 1978 Everest House catalog with its list of twenty-two books would offer some insight to Rader’s true motives.  Quest and Everest House, while subsidized directly by money from the Church, which had been collected from tithe paying members for the preaching of the Gospel, was quit obviously engaged in promoting a very unchristian message.  Jack Martin and other Church employees were evidently placed in positions at Quest for a short period of time to appease those who objected the initial Quest issues.  Now, in all of the turmoil over Garner Ted’s ouster, it was very easy to remove these people from Quest and it wouldn’t even be noticed.  And to keep quiet they were kept on salary while they had no job to go to.

Looking through the Everest House catalog we find publications such as Dark Dimensions; A Celebration of the Occult. The description reads, “In this startling new exploration of the wonders of the occult world, the renowned author and one of the world’s greatest authorities on parapsychology, Colin Wilson brings together the extraordinary feats of nine masters of magic.”  The book contains accounts of homosexuality, mutilation, and sex perversion.  Another book entitles In Search of…glorifies the demonic talents of psychics such as Jeanne Dixon and explores the satanic practices of Kirlian photography. The LTR Money Book is not as sedate a financial advisory as the title would indicate.  It contains advice for gay couples and instructions for homosexuals who wish to get married or divorced.  And Zen Running is not a book on jogging, but rather a book that advises how one can let his mind go through the use of Zen.  Certainly a strange list of books to be published by an organization that claims to serve Jesus Christ under the leadership of a man who claims to be God’s apostle.

(pg 115) Perhaps the true spiritual leadership of the Church could be better understood when one considers Rader’s statement regarding his birth date. When asked his date of birth by a reporter, Rader stated, “August 14, 1930.  I’m a Leo”.  While many Christians may be aware of their so-called astrological birth sign as a result of having followed such practices before their conversion, it is something that a converted Christian would not longer retain in his mind. Rader’s interest in astrology seems to go far beyond his simple recitation of his birth sign. Could it be that some of the books offered by Everest House are the true handbooks of Rader’s spiritual life and in fact other aspects of his life also?  The answers to these questions were to become into more clear focus as time progressed.

When the prophet Isaiah told of the judgment to come upon Babylon for her evil ways and rejection of God, he said mockingly, “Let now the astrologers, the star gazers, the monthly prognosticators stand up, and save thee from these things that shall come upon thee.” (Isaiah 47:13)  Rader's preoccupation with the occult led him to state in a talk to Church employees, “If I were teaching course in metaphysics we could spend an whole semester talking about what reality is. “  Strangely enough no one picked it up.  From Rader’s comments and his further actions, it would become more and more apparent which God he really serves.

Through the rest of the year Herbert Armstrong, through a massive propaganda effort, continued to strengthen his position as God’s apostle.  At the same time Stanley Rader was about to liquidate Church properties in order to provide the money needed to keep the organization afloat.  From year to year the Church operated at a deficit and the financial crisis was virtual way of life in the Church.  Of course, all of the Church’s problems had been blamed on Garner Ted and his so-called attempts to secularize the Church.  Now that he was out, the Church’s problems could no longer be blamed on him.  Now that the cause of the problems was no longer in the Church, Armstrong must therefore come through and eliminate all problems.  To cover himself, through sermons and Church publications, the members were constantly reminded that they were in a lax spiritual condition and were not behind him, the apostle.  If they were not behind the apostle, Armstrong said, then God would remove his blessing from the Church.  The members were under constant pressure to dig deeper into their pickets as a show of support or suffer the terrible guilt feelings of being (pg 116) unfaithful to God or, even worse, they were in a constant fear of perishing in the lake of fire for failure to support God’s Church and his apostle.  A despotic leader always has the tools of intimidation and fear at his command, tools which enable him to maintain control under virtually any circumstance.  No matter what may go wrong, he can blame the problem on someone else, further reinforcing his own position as great leader and the only one who can solve the latest crisis.  It almost seems that a despotic leader can only maintain his control in a time of trouble and crisis; his follower’s reason, “If things are this bad with our great leader in control and being constantly attacked, what will happen if we lose him?”

A key point to Armstrong reinforcing his position as apostle depended upon the establishment of an authority for that claim.  In the past he had always criticized the claim of the Pope to be a spiritual descendant of Peter, the first Pope.  Of course, there is no historical proof whatsoever that Peter was the first Pope, and in fact it cannot be proven that he was ever in Rome.  It is more likely that Peter was never in Rome, as Paul was the apostle to the Gentiles and there is considerable record of Paul having been spent much time in Rome. 

Now Armstrong, in a July 10, 1978 “Pastor’s Report,” was to put himself in a position of going against his own previous teaching and against scripture as well when he claimed that Peter had been the head apostle and that in this age he, Armstrong was not only the head apostle but the only apostle.  Armstrong says, referring to the power to impose decisions upon the Church, or as it is called, “bind and loose,” “To WHOM did Christ give power to bind and loose?  NOT THE CHURCH AS A COLLECTIVE VOTING BODY.  God’s government is from the TOP DOWN –NOT Democracy!”  Yet the scriptural example is quit different.  In Acts 15 is the account of the apostles gathering in Jerusalem to discuss the matter of whether or not Gentile converts to Christianity must be circumcised.  This was a major issue, as the accounts said (117) that there had been much disputing.  But the “plain truth” of the Bible is not the Plain Truth for Herbert Armstrong.  For he concluded his article in the “Pastor’s Report,” “God speaks with a decisive and certain voice through the one HE has chosen, and used these many years as HIS instrument.

“I do not ask your permission – I TELL YOU as Christ leads me.”

And then the announcements started coming regarding another about face at Ambassador College.  It was not again to be a full four-year college.  The July 17^th issue of the Good News revealed that Armstrong was now purging out the deadly leaven of higher education. Of course this deadly leaven of higher education, as he called it, was all a result of his son Garner Ted having led the Church into secularism and into the world’s ways.  In all modesty and humility as befits a true minister of Jesus Christ, Armstrong reveals in this article how he originally established Ambassador College as what he calls God’s college.  He said, “I recognized clearly that I myself as the ONLY available faculty member possessing SPIRITUAL knowledge must DOMINATE the teaching staff and inculcate the KNOWLEDGE OF GOD into the students.”  After two pages of rambling on about his own greatness and character attacks against his son, whom he accused of removing all of Herbert Armstrong-trained instructors from important positions, he said, “The ‘coup’ had become complete.”  Armstrong then continued in explaining why he had removed his son from the church, “And (pg 118) THAT, brethren, is why God has roused me to TAKE OVER – why the living CHRIST has stepped in to HEAD GOD’S CHURCH and to SET BOTH CHURCH AND COLLEGE BACK ON GOD’S TRACK.  Truly Satan had all but WRECKED the Church, the college and the WORK of the living God – it HAD JUMPED THE TRACK WHERE GOD THROUGH ME HAD SET IT!

“That is WHY I had been led by CHRIST to move swiftly to resume human LEADERSHIP! – TO PUT THE CHURCH AND IT’S WORK BACK ON GOD’S TRACK!”

The man who accused his son of secularism is, incredibly enough, the very same man who only a few months earlier had stated that he was embarrassed to represent himself as a minister of a Church world leaders. HE is the same man who goes to these world leaders and tells them that the whole cause of the world’s problems is the fact that the world follows the way of get and God’s way is a way of give. That is the beginning, the end, and sum total of his so-called message of Jesus Christ.  The name Jesus Christ is not mentioned at all. Yet the Church members’ minds are so conditioned to believe everything this man tells them that they blindly follow. Whomever he accuses of wrong leadership, disobedience, or disloyalty is automatically guilty in the minds of the members.  Now Herbert Armstrong must fight vigorously to solidify his position as the apostle, as he fears his son.  He had hoped his son would take the bait of the $50,000 annual payoff, and it didn’t work.

Herbert Armstrong went on to state in the July 31^st edition of the Good News with blaring headlines: “THE GREAT MAJESTIC GOD BEING ENTHRONED IN EYES OF CHURCH ONCE AGAIN BY JESUS CHRIST.”  Again the constant repetition of the same theme, week after week, month after month: “Yes, more than generally realized, Satan was manipulating things to make God’s Church and his Work more and more secular – more like any other purely worldly and human activity!”  His statement, of course, was true. The Church was becoming more and more secular.  However, his son was not the cause of it – he was.

Herbert Armstrong would play the game by different rules in different circumstances and. Buy constant distortion and manipulation and by using fear, maintain his base of support. It seems that egomania and extreme paranoia go hand in hand.  While Armstrong envisions himself as God’s apostle, he also feels threatened.

(pg 119)  While he feels threatened by his son and the Church of God International, he also feels threatened by Stanley Rader. He knows that he is secure only as long as Rader can use him.  For, in fact, Rader controls the Church.

On the subject of his proper handling of his duties, Armstrong says, “And if he doesn’t? If he needs correction or removal?  If so that is CHRIST’S responsibility – and HE WILL SEE TO IT.  It is not the responsibility of those UNDER the apostle to correct him.

“But maybe Christ is NOT LOOKING or maybe Christ neglects to correct him?  Should not the people under him then take it into their hands?  To do so would DEFY CHRIST –TRY TO TAKE CHRIST’S JOB AWAY FROM HIM!”

Logic clearly says that if Christ is going to correct Herbert Armstrong, He will do it either by removing him through death or illness or through the use of other people who may take certain actions.  Yet Armstrong is telling the people that no matter what they may see wrong, they are to sit idly by and do nothing. Is this any different than the rational that Hitler used on his subjects to convince them that they should say nothing while millions of Jews were being burned in the ovens?  For many Germans believed as Hitler claimed – that he was a special leader of the German people ordained by God to fulfill a purpose.

Going ahead to the November 8^th issue of “The Pastor’s Report,” Armstrong in an article entitled, “HOW CHRIST GIVES THE CHURCH ITS DOCTRINES,” he fully establishes his Peter Primacy Theory.  In it he states, “Peter did have many primacy as chief apostle.”  By this time Armstrong had put into the Worldwide Church of God the Catholic Doctrine of Peter Primacy, and he, Armstrong, was the modern-day fulfillment of Peter’s office. Now Herbert Armstrong had fully established the office of Church leader in a direct parallel to that of the Pope in Rome.  This in spite of the fact that in earlier years Armstrong had criticized the Papacy as being pagan in origin, having its roots in the Babylonian mystery religions.

To make sure Armstrong had no opposition, he redeveloped his program to squelch all opposition, and reconstructed the college in a way that he could produce automatons as graduates, who would faithfully serve him.  Even at his age, he is not one to think in a shirt term, as he expects to be around a long time. He fully expects to be alive when Christ returns.

(pg 120) To further mold minds into the state necessary for blind obedience, it is necessary that the desire to excel be totally destroyed. In academic subjects, of course, one must excel to pass the course.  However, Armstrong was to have no spirit of competition where one would seek to excel in any way over another.

In purging out this “evil” concept, this leavening of higher education that had crept into God’s college, Armstrong stated, “We don’t have physical education this year. We want to have it again, but competition is one of those things Satan introduced, so we are not going to have intercollegiate completion.  I never was for that in the first place, and until my son was taking over and he wanted it, we didn’t have it.  That’s out and it’s going to stay out.”

And then of course, the use of fear.  To be obedient, people must be fearful, Armstrong told the students, “Ambassador College will never go Satan’s way again, I promise you that.  And if I find it tending to, I will close it down.”

And through all of this Garner Ted was not getting off lightly either.  His father continued to attack him.  Again Armstrong constantly hammered away at the fact that his son was out to displace him as God’s apostle he said in the September 21^st “Pastor’s Report,”  “I began to sense an undercover conspiracy for my son to take over – as two of King David’s sons Adonijah and Absalom tried by deceptive means to conspire to take over David’s throne.”  From this type of propaganda the Church members were beginning to get the picture that Garner Ted, who had introduced evil competitive sports was laying the ground work for training people to be of an evil conspiratorial mind, as his father claimed him to be.

Herbert Armstrong continued:  “Ted always wanted a more liberal way of life than I had learned from GOD’S WORD.”  What Herbert Armstrong does not discuss here is whether he himself has wanted a more liberal way of life than he had learned from God’s word.  Whatever liberal conduct Garner Ted had engaged in was (pg 121) not without precedent in the Armstrong family, as we were to learn later.

Continuing to lash out against his very own son, Herbert Armstrong actually makes what would be more fitting as a statement of self-indictment.  He said, “My son is out to GET not GIVE.  While he writes and by his clever words and ‘fear speeches’ he deceives some sincere brethren to thinking he is ‘proclaiming the gospel of the world,’ YOU KNOW that is a LIE!”

Having several homes to live in, several chauffer-driven limousines, including a Roils Royce at his beck and call, a lifestyle befitting that of a king. Armstrong could have written that very statement about himself from his desk in his Gulfstream II Jet.  But it was becoming increasingly obvious that Herbert Armstrong was feeling threatened by his son having started a church.  He fought and fought hard.  For a man who hates competition he himself could handle it quit well.

In the December 4^th issue of Good News, Armstrong wrote an article entitles “IS CHRIST STARTING A SECOND CHURCH?”  He goes on at great length to claim that there is only one true church, the Worldwide Church of God headed by God’s apostle, himself.  He claims that the acts of his son are quit different from his own acts in the 1930’s when he broke away from the Oregon Conference of the Church of God.  Through convoluted reasoning, Armstrong claims that he was never a member of that Church, therefore he did not break away to start a new Church.  He claims that he was uniquely called by God to raise up the end-time Church, the Worldwide Church of God, which he calls “the Philadelphian era of the Church.”

He goes on, in the December 18^th issue, with two more articles claiming that God’s Church is not composed of many separate groups and that Christ is the living head of only one Church not two.  Armstrong goes on and on, making the point that there cannot even be other organizations believing the truth of God, for it there were, they would be part of t the Worldwide Church of God. Insisting that God’s true Church is the Worldwide Church of God, he accuses his son of incorporating the Church of God International with a name very close to the Worldwide Church of God as a means of deceiving and, misleading brethren into thinking it’s the same Church.

Yet Armstrong felt no guilt about operating for years as the (pg 122) Radio Church of God prior to the Worldwide Church of God, after he himself withdrew from the Oregon Conference of the Church of God.  While he continues to deny having been part of the Church of God Seventh Day at Salem, West Virginia, the Church has in its file the following document containing Herbert Armstrong’s signature: “I am anxious to begin  on the ministry which has fallen to me by lot, in the one body, and am determined by the help of the Lord to live and teach the commandments of God and the faith of Jesus Christ as found in Holy Scriptures, and as outlined in the Constitution of the Church of God, with world headquarters at Jerusalem, Palestine. Will you please record this my acceptance, and have credentials issued to me, according to my ministry in the body.”

It is interesting note that not only did Herbert Armstrong receive his credentials as a minster of that organization, but he acknowledged that organization as being “the Body,” meaning the Body of Christ or the true Church.  How, then, could he later form another organization and claim it was the true Church?  Does that mean that other predecessor organizations ceased to be so, even though they remain in existence?  As God’s apostle, does he have the authority over these other organizations?  One could run in circles trying to figure out the logic of Herbert Armstrong.  But in his own mind the while matter is clear, for he states, “God does not have two churches – only ONE Church that Jesus Christ founded in A.D. 31 and raised up to carry on in OUR time though His own chosen apostle.”  If that statement is true, then Herbert Armstrong must have been ordained into the ministry of a false church, in which case his ordination is fraudulent and not only is he not an apostle, but he is not even a minister in the Church of God.

The most incredible aspect of all of this, however, was that Herbert Armstrong’s propaganda was very effective.  The Church members, for the most part, believed even more fervently that the Worldwide Church of God was the only true Church, that Herbert Armstrong was God’s Apostle, and that to go against the Church or Herbert Armstrong was to go against God Himself.

Among the ministry, even though for the most part there was a belief in Armstrong’s apostleship, many of them harbored sever doubts about the character and motives of Stanley Rader.  Although they supported Rader’s position before their congregations, he became a subject of increasing concern within their own (pg 123) ranks. Many were concerned about what they viewed to be Rader’s heavy influence over Herbert Armstrong.  In dealing with this matter, Herbert Armstrong, in an August 21^st “Pastor’s Report” characterized such concern as character assassination, evil speaking, and destructive gossip, al of which had to be stamped out of God’s Church.  He said that he agreed with Rader’s position that an attack against Rader was an attack against him.  An attack against Armstrong was also, according to him, an attack against God.  He was now putting forth a doctrine whereby this continuous chain an attack against Rader would be in effect an attack against God.  Armstrong said, “But you who have accepted these defaming innuendos against the character of Stan Rader, ANSWER ME THIS: What PROOF – NO EVIDENCE WHATSOEVER!” He then went on to brag about the qualities of Rader and his exceptional talents and abilities, keen and brilliant mind and his wealth of experience.  Armstrong said that Rader had been of inestimable value to God’s Work. He said, “He has been of VALUE to me in my personal activities in the Work beyond description.”

Armstrong continued: “I have known for years the GREAT VALUE of Mr. Stanley Rader’s services. The character assassination spread among some of the ministry against him was, in reality, intended to harm the personal representative and apostle of Jesus Christ – whom HE chose, and for fifty years had USED, in building this entire great Worldwide WORK!  One must wonder why Herbert Armstrong would fight so hard to defend Stanley Rader.  After all, if a top executive of an organization, no matter how qualified for his position, acts in such a way as to create great dissension among subordinates, then there is a problem which must be dealt with.  It just would not make sense to allow an organization to tear itself apart at the seams because of such a problem.

What is interesting in this situation is the fact that while virtually none of the ministry had gone over to the Church of God International and Garner Ted Armstrong, there was still a great concern about Stanley Rader.  Armstrong, aware that the ministers would not submit to political suicide by directly confronting him with accusations against Rader said, “If any of you have EVIDENCE or PROOF, of anything, more than hearsay, against Mr. Rader, come (pg 124) forth with it, and I will deal with it.  If not, and you still want to go along condemning him, I will be happy to accept your resignation.”

The Rader matter kept seething and building however, and in the December 4^th Good News Armstrong dealt with the matter further, in an article entitle, “Answering Smear Stories,” Armstrong reported that Rader said that his health was not up to par and that all the stress and strain was wearing on him and that he felt that he should probably resign.  This was a standard tactic of Rader’s to reaffirm his position. Whenever Rader felt that his position was being threatened he would then inform Armstrong that maybe it would be better if he resigned. Of course, each time Armstrong would convince him to stay.  The reason according to Armstrong in this article was, “If his health permits I shall plead with him to stay with me, for I NEED HIM AS MY ASSISTANT.  He is of inestimable values to the Work.  His fruits have been good – actually superb.”

While it would appear that Rader’s periodic requests for permission to resign was for legitimate health reasons, what few realized at the time was it was in effect a veiled threat to Herbert Armstrong. What no one knew at the time that this article appeared was the fact, contrary to his public statements; Herbert Armstrong was finally, this time after months of wrestling with the problem, appearing to remove Rader from his official position in the Church.  This, in spite of the fact that only two months earlier in October the Associate Press sent a wire story to the papers throughout the country which called Rader the new crown prince of the Armstrong Empire.  According to that article, there could be no doubt that Garner Ted had been a loser in a power struggle and that Rader was firmly entrenched.  The article stated, “Four months after the ouster of TV evangelist Garner Ted Armstrong, the troubled Worldwide Church of God has a new crown prince, a formally Jewish lawyer-accountant who could inherit the rich religious empire of Armstrong’s father.”  Rader was quoted as saying, “Mr. Armstrong has said publicly very often that I am a son in whom he is well pleased.”  This man, the very man who some  in the ministry are concerned about, the man who Armstrong is publicly exalting while privately planning to remove, has so displaced Herbert Armstrong’s real son that he now apparently fills that position.

The question of whether or not Rader will succeed Herbert Armstrong (pg 125) is really at the root of the concern among the ministry. Had it not been for Garner Ted’s violent objection, Armstrong would have ordained Rader as a minister on the day that he baptized him. Had that happened, Rader would have been seen at this point as the obvious successor of Armstrong.  Now it could be a matter of speculation.  But if Armstrong had intended at one time to ordain Rader, might he still do so in spite of his secret desire to remove him?  These were problems that Herbert Armstrong would have to deal with and in fact would find that he had little to say about.

On the matter of succession, Rader said, “I don’t feel that it is my calling. I don’t want to be a minister.  Of course, several letters have come in recently telling me that Christ was not a minister. He was a carpenter.”  A statement such as that on the part of Stanley Rader requires little speculation as to his true motives.

While the Church was being barraged with the Armstrong-Rader propaganda, the program of asset liquidation was well under way.  The inoperative Ambassador College campus at Bricket Wood, England was finally sold on September 1978.  The property, containing nearly two hundred acres with several buildings, swimming pool, track and other athletic facilities, was sold for approximately $4 million to the General Electricity Generating Board.  The London Daily Mail, in reporting the sale of the property, described its history: “Ambassador College, as it now is, started life early this century as the country residence of East Indian Merchant Sir David Huel, a former director of the Midland Bank.  In the sixties it was sold to an obscure religious sect.”  “Obscure religious sect” –an interesting way for the Church to be described by a British newspaper after millions had been spent on Herbert Armstrong’s world travels so that the Church and its message would be known around the world.  Ina nation where Armstrong claimed to be co-hosting a movie premier with the Queen, the Church is reported as being an “obscure religious sect.”  One must wonder what Herbert Armstrong did in Britain during his lengthy visits other than ride around in his chauffer-driven Rolls Royce and spend tens of thousands of dollars at Harrods’s

Perhaps Britain was important to Armstrong and Rader as an operating base for which they could conduct activities in other countries.  The former wife of a leading church official recalls that in the late 1960’s and early 1970’s, Herbert Armstrong would boastfully state to her that Rader was taking another trip to France (pg 126) to meet the Princess.  Rader was to go to Paris to accompany a princess on shopping trips and then return her in the Church-owned jet to her own country.  Sine this activity was not publicized to the Church members, it is hard to conceive how expenditure for such travel can be justified.  While Herbert Armstrong was not stingy with the Church’s money when it came to running a taxi service for royalty, his attitude toward average Church members was quit different.

Again, the same woman recalls that while she lived in England with her former husband, while he was a college official, there was an occasion when Church members from the States were visiting Ambassador College in Bricket Wood.  These people were planning to return home when Herbert Armstrong coincidently planned to return to the States with the Church jet. On that particular trip, there were few if any others travelling with him, leaving excess available space on board.  It was suggested to him that perhaps he could bring these visitors back to the State, since he had extra room.  Armstrong’s comment was, “Who are they anyway? They are just Church members.  I don’t have time for nobody’s.”  While he enjoyed the ego satisfaction of associating with royalty and leading political figures around the world, he had little time for the people who were paying the freight.  He was certainly correct when he would say God’s way was the way of outgoing love and concern for others whereas the world’s way was the way of get.  However, the example that he set was quite contrary to the message he preached.  All this is not new, of course, as it has often been said that ministers don’t practice what they preach. It’s such an old, worn-out cliché, yet it appears that few have carried it to the extreme Herbert Armstrong has.

Along with the sale of the Bricket Wood campus, similar plans were made for the Big Sandy, Texas campus of Ambassador College.  On October 31^st, Rader announced that the Big Sandy campus would be sold to F. William Menge of Lynchburg, Virginian, and that the property would be used by the James Robinson Evangelistic Association.  The entire sixteen-hundred –acre parcel, which included full college facilities, several lavish homes, an operating farm and an airfield capable of handling small jet aircraft, was sold for $10.6 million dollars.  There were many who considered this price to be far below its true value and, to top it off, this property for which Herbert Armstrong many (pg 127) years ago asked the people of the Church to sacrifice financially, as he said that God had placed His name there.  Such words coming from the apostle would virtually make the Big Sandy campus hallowed ground.  Yet it was now being sold at a bargain price to one of the “world’s churches,” that Armstrong often characterized as “Satan’s churches.”

During this same period of time the Church announces plans to dispose of at least two convention properties used for the annual Feast of Tabernacles.  This constant process of asset liquidation to cover operating deficits would never be tolerated in a business enterprise, and it certainly would never be tolerated in a church.  Here was an organization with tens of millions of dollars in assets and since it was a charitable, non-profit organization, the officers were actually trustees of these properties.  They, according to the law, administered the assets, as a trust and had a fiduciary responsibility.  Yet Armstrong and Rader would capriciously do as they wished with the asset, as though it was all their own personal property.

Truly the title bestowed upon Rader by the news media, “crown prince of the Armstrong empire,” was fitting, as the entire operation was and still is no more than a personal kingdom with the tithe-paying members of the Church being no more than mere serfs.  And as loyal serfs, most of them had so long ago stopped thinking, that they were happy to continue being defrauded.

As one who was by this time a former member planning a lawsuit against the Church leaders, one could say it was no longer any concern of mine if the members didn’t care, but they were not the only ones supporting the activities of t the organization.  Over 24 percent of the income to the Church in 1977 was received from non-member contributors.  These are people who for one reason or another, having heard the broadcasts or received The Plain Truth or other Church literature, decided to contribute.  These contributors consist of occasional contributors known as “donors” and “co-workers” which was a classification given to those contributors who contributed at least twice in a twelve month period.  Once one had fallen into the category of “co-worker” he was then on the mailing list for the “co-worker” letters, the propaganda sheets sent out by Armstrong boasting of  his fulfilling of the great commission, and soliciting additional financial support.  These non-member contributors certainly were not of the same (pg 128) commitment to the organizations were the Church members.  In most cases, they merely thought, from the superficial view that they had of the organization, that they were supporting an evangelistic work that was bringing the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the world, while in many cases not even being in agreement with all the Church’s doctrines.

One fact remains, however. Non-member contributions, as do members, have a right to expect their contributions to be used for the purpose for which they are given.  While a rationalization could be made that the members could handle any dispute internally by discussing questions with their ministers, that option is not open to non-members.  Therefore, there was no doubt in my mind that even though I had withdrawn from the Church, I still had a duty to pursue this matter.  The Worldwide Church of God was a tax-exempt organization receiving certain benefits from the State and Federal Government, including reduced postage rate and the ability to purchase broadcast time on federally licensed broadcast stations.  As such, the general public has a right to be protected from misrepresentation.

If an organization wishes to misrepresent itself to members and defraud them, it may be considered an internal matter.  Once the general public becomes involved, it is quite another situation.

Losing Faith In Faith

I remember well when Joseph Tkach Jr, Eternal Head of the present, almost non-existant, Worldwide Church of God, said that from what they could tell, almost 40,000 former members were staying home from any church. Others have written well about this total mismanagement of the spirituality and sincere hopes that tens of thousands had invested in over the years in that particular church, so I spare you.


I would like to talk a bit about how one, such as myself, can go from being a minister in WCG, or any church for that matter, to an informed skeptic, with the hope that human beings, somehow, are spirits trapped in a limited five sensed carbon based wet suit of sorts, for now. No, I'm really not kidding! Very metaphysical I know, but then again, you never heard of a bunch of metaphysicists declaring war, Jihad and utter annihilation upon each other unless they repent or convert to each others "faith." Most of the real history of Christianity, Islam and Judaism as practiced by those who rule over the believer is pure bullshit. Is it any wonder that people of faith, inquiry and hope simply want to be left alone?


Years ago I took a personality profile test found it so accurate, down to the kinds of gestures I use and why, that I suggest to Joe Tkach that all ministers and leader types take one. This, from my naive perspective, might just prevent sending the same, ill placed and probably not really called to serve anyone but themselves type ministers from going on and on and hurting one congregation after another. WCG had this very bad habit of transferring it's problem ministers rather than confronting them. They said no to testing. Now I know why. People hate the insecurity that comes from knowing they aren't as special as they think they are.


Being out of the loop, it took me years to figure this out. It took me years to admit that what I was seeing in WCG was happening as my ENFP personality, which is Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling and Perceptive, also is founded upon the idea that people like me are negotiators, ministers, counselors and even massage therapists, but simply hate conflict. Or as my son said so aptly said once, "dad, you'd take a stabbing lying down." That hurt, not the stabbing, but the fact he was right. It's my loathing of conflict I have found that some, like Dave Pack, leader of the Restored Church of God, and others, who are what I would consider abusive, personality driven and more narcissist than shepherds, actually thrive on. Or as Stanley Rader, personal counsel to Herbert Armstrong once said, "I don't care what you say about me, just spell my name right." True narcissism. And so I dismissed in my mind what my heart was telling me was so and went about the business of pastoring people in concepts I still had faith in, even if I could see that the higher up one went in the business of religion, the more your brains turned to shit and you forgot where you put your spirit.


But even more than that, even more than losing faith in a particular church, I knew I was losing faith in faith. I had seen too much that was real and did not match the great promises of the Bible. For all the conflict over healing and doctor care, make-up, and all that I generally labeled as "majoring in the minors," I never asked anyone to do or not do what I would or would not do myself. My conscience is clean when it comes to being an enforcer of stupid things in years gone by. I found that "ask and you shall not have, do not ask and all things are possible", worked just fine in most cases and the years have proven my gut feelings correct in thinking that "someday, none of these things will be issues."


Back to the original thought. I have always been a seeker and open to new things even as a minister. Actually my internal definition of a minister seemed to contain the "keep looking" clause, but that was rare among my peers who felt they had found once and for all, as I did too, but now don't. I think my working mostly alone, apart from the big cities and multiple ministers in one place, probably saved me from scrutiny. The few times I did work with other ministers it was ongoing drama and egomania. I found it entertaining but stupid as well and it took me years to see it was more widespread than I imagined. So even as a minister in a "One True Church," I could see the Bible itself had problems that my Church and all Churches simply do not want to address. I think I ended my own ministry in the midst of WCG's "miracle from Christ" (was Jesus drunk when he did this miracle?), when I asked in a Festival Sermon at Myrtle Beach before one of last large gatherings of WCG members for such things, "Just where do babies come from," when showing how Matthew only over reached in trying to show how Jesus was born of a Virgin etc. I know most of you believe he was, but I will still ask you where do babies come from? Mark, Luke, John and Paul (not a band) knew nothing of what Matthew "knew."


Even as a kid in Sunday School, the stories in the Bible generated many questions about how such things could be in reality. Did Joshua really stop the earth from rotating so the Israelites could kill more Amelakites? Answer: NO. Not only is it bad science, but it's a just plain stupid reason to stop the rotation of the earth! Also, no one else on the planet noticed, which made me suspect.


Did 600,000 men, plus women, children and hangers on really trek around the Sinai in a group for 40 years leaving no signs of it? NO, they did not, at least not that many or for that long. I once read a study on how long it would take those in the back of a group that large to get moving once the front of the group started to move. It was weeks! It's mythology adopted to give a small insignificant people, who now get way too much attention, a history. How many times have we almost found Noah's Ark? Always a great story in the news that just goes away. It never happened, at least not in anyway the Bible describes.


Over time, I came to see that evolution of all life, including man, is generally true, details to unfold as time goes on. The defensive arguments of the Creationists are lame. Not to them, because they need to believe it, but to me, because I don't. I'm not afraid not to believe the unbelievable. I'd rather be ahead of my times than behind. I have flint hand tools in my collection that are 1.8 and 1.4 million years old, from Oldavai Gorge in Kenya made by "men" who became us over time. I can sit and hold them, and somehow it comforts and enlightens me. I have 12,000 year old Ice Age American spear points that do the same. I have a coin given to me as a tip, minted by Caligula to remind the population of Jerusalem just who really was in charge. It doesn't encourage me, but it does inform.


I have had my DNA taken back 70,000 years to Africa (I'm Dutch) and tracing the personal journey my cells, blood and spit have taken to get "me" to America. Fascinating how my saliva proves that in the distant past, "I" traveled through Yemen, Iran, Iraq, the Russian Steppes and left into Europe as Cro-Magnon, routing the Neanderthal who were already there, but lacked the imagination I had to rid the place of them in 18,000 years or so. I love that explanation and journey far more than I do those of the Bible, because it is true.


When I was a pastor and WCG was changing over from Holydays to Holidays, every doubt about the Biblical story of Jesus birth circumstances and the actual narratives came out. I felt that if they could flip over to something so theologically lame as Christmas, I could finally examine my doubts about the whole story. Needless to say, the birth narratives, over which the Church said I studied too much, are not coherent, do not agree, are two different stories, are not known by Mark, John or Paul and find their origins in pagan mythology. All Paul knew of the physical Jesus, who he never met or quoted, was that he was "born of a woman of the tribe of Judah." Nothing special there. Long story.


From there, I discovered that the story of the dying Sons of God in history, such as Osiris, Mithras and Jesus, were retelling of the larger story of the journey the real SUN of God takes around the 12 constellations of the Zodiac every year. It is no coincidence that the SON of God and the SUN are crucified in the Spring on and around the Spring Equinox or that Jesus was the Lamb of God as was the SUN in Aries, the Lamb when it was "crucified". For Jesus to be "with you until the end of the age," means more the age of Aries which ended 2000 years ago with Jesus death and not the end of the world as fundamentalist Christians insist. It explained all those 12 tribes, 12 sons, 12 disciples, 12 Apostles etc, that surrounded the "SON" on his one year ministry, according to Matthew, Mark and Luke, but three years according to John. It's no coincidence that in Revelation, God is surrounded by 24 elders, which are the hours in the day. To me this makes perfect sense and the fact that Matthew's Gospel accounts of Jesus ministry through the twelve months of his short ministry, exactly match the story of the SUN through the twelve signs of the Zodiac. Stories in the Bible that make no sense literally on earth, (like the Magi seeing Jesus star in the East and following it West to his house) often make perfect sense when you understand them as astro-theology. The story of the dying Son/Sun of God takes place every year over our heads. Light is the great revealer, but light also hides. You won't hear that story in church! Nuther long story. I suppose years ago I did wonder why in Malachi, the "Messiah" or Jesus as Christians said it pointed to, was said to be "the Sun that arose with healing in his wings." If you know of the Egyptian sun symbol with wings, you'll see how old a concept that was.


So while I find the story of the Bible in the heavens, as below...so above etc, I don't fear the literalism of the Bible anymore, nor would I teach it. This is, in part, why I feel strongly about those that are manipulated by ignorant and pushy pastor types, into supporting something literally that is not literally to be supported. Ideas have consequences and we see that every day with religion gone amuck. Spirituality, as I have always noted, comes from within and doesn't need your money nor for you to show up Wednesday evenings, Saturday or Sunday.
Now to some, the reason I can go on this journey of discovery and enlightenment, while painful at times, is because I was never converted to the truth of past affiliations. I think I was. I was a true believer for a long time. But when I saw how quickly those in "high" places could change and demand change, everything I ever doubted bubbled up and here I am. I have both a deep resentment for those that have hurt so many and a gratefulness that I was able to get out and not have the drama of all that followed. The local church I last pastored was already using me as a punching bag in place of those they really resented enough. Remember, I don't like conflict, much less being the imagined target and cause of their anger. I learned to tell people I was never one of them, but one of "you" working for "them." I grew up Presbyterian and well outside a lifelong WCG mentality. I did manage to remind Joe Tkach that he was reinventing the wheel and that what he found so so new in Jesus, was so so old a story to the vast majority of those who came to WCG in the first place. For that I was told later that "HQ thinks you know a lot about Jesus, Dennis...but they don't think you KNOW Jesus." Uh oh.... :) Actually I think I know about Jesus more than they can possibly imagine... at least the Jesus of the Bible. It seems real contemporaries of Jesus know little or nothing of a Jesus who was known everywhere according to the Bible.


And so I have lost faith in just having faith. I like the facts more than I like faith. I understand faith and I agree that sometimes there is nothing to have but faith until facts come forward. But I do not substitute faith for facts. Even a good Buddhist will say that sometimes there is nothing left in life to do but have a good laugh. A good laugh and "faith" sometimes are the same thing. When I had my kids immunized in 1974 when it was not fashionable theologically in WCG, I did so because facts over rode my faith factors. When Herbert Armstrong said in a Bible study that dinosaurs probably couldn't reproduce because they were created by Satan who couldn't either, I went with the cover of National Geographic that displayed dino eggs. That happened a lot over the years when I listened to one minister or another on various topics they really knew little about. Mixing religion with science is lame.
So now I kid about "rubbing people the right way." It still fits my personality profile. I"m still an extrovert, intuitive, feeling and perceptive. I still do "counseling" and I still hate conflict and confrontation. I don't, however, believer I will take a stabbing lying down again. I suggest you find out what you are and you'll understand your life in much more detail. Humans are hardwired the moment the sperm hits the egg...the rest is conditioning, programming, tribal expectations, fear, guilt and shame that keeps one in line with the group, religion or organization.


Sometimes we have to loose our minds to come to our senses. You can loose a lot of other things along the way when you do that, but being more authentic is well worth it. It's what ENFP's treasure almost above all other things.

DenniscDiehl@aol.com