Regrets: No Unringing the Bell

While many a famous person at the end of their careers usually sings a round of "Regrets, I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention,"  I think they have to be kidding themselves.  They really haven't had just a few regrets.  They are usually drunk when they start singing that. We all do it our way because it is us doing it and life lived long enough brings many regrets.

On the other hand, I might rewrite it to be "Regrets, I've had a bunch. And then again, too many to mention."  Much of that regret is not doing it my way at all but rather doing it the ways others told me I should and must do it, whatever it was.  On Banned, we all get reminded of our religious choices of the past and regrets.

In religion, HWA and the WCG told me to do it their way.  And I did.  I choose to do it their way because I thought that somehow and in some way, ( I was very young) they had an inside line to God and truth and I was really doing it God's way  (I did come to hate religious folk substitution "I did it God's way" for the actual lyrics however. ). God and truth were topics that interested me at a very early age and the hook was easily set . I wanted to be a church pastor long before I heard of WCG. I wanted to know what the Bible had to say, who Jesus was and what was the meaning of it all.  You could not have talked me out it.  I had to do that to myself after years of observing, thinking, study and deciding that I would be better off making my own choices from now on.

But now time has past, water has gone under many bridges and the hindsight of age leaves me, and I assume everyone, many regrets in life on many topics.  Banned, of course, is for us who regret our doctrinal and church choices as members and ministers and somehow find a sadistic pleasure in following those still stuck in it and especially those who think they have inherited the leadership positions they evidently craved in times gone by and now have an open shot at.

I could list several dozen personal regrets as could we all but when it's all said and done, life teaches us that fires go out, water seeks its own level and lessons, for whatever reasons, are noted.  That's probably about the best one can do with regrets.  We can take new paths, learn what we wished had known long ago and keep moving ahead with our lives older and wiser.  But we can't unring the bells of past choices and simply have to put regrets in whatever perspective helps us the most.

Not doing so can kill us from all directions and in many ways.

I found this observation long ago and find it so very true if you get to live long enough.

When I was young, mountains were just mountains and rivers were just rivers

But then  I was told that mountains are not just mountains and rivers are not just rivers.

But when I was old, mountains indeed were just mountains and rivers were just rivers

This speaks volumes to me of my own personal WCG/Member/Minister experience.  Nothing was a big deal when I was young until someone came along and convinced me that everything was a big deal only to learn years later that I was right. Nothing is a big deal after all.  

Mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health has to be directly related to how we process regrets.  I have learned that if I wait around for everyone to like, forgive , put up with or agree with me is probably going to take a very long time and actually will never happen. So it is with us all I suspect.  Fortunately, I no longer have that as criteria for healthy living. I do still wince over the term "Ministurd" but sooth myself knowing that others were "Memberturds" so it all works out. LOL

Eckhart Tolle said "All negativity is some form of non-acceptance.  Anytime you  find yourself being negative, ask yourself what is it you are not accepting."  I can't find any fault with this observation.  It is how it works.  Regrets are like this.  They produce a lot of negativity when they stir us up but in the final analysis simply must be accepted as a part of the show.  Yelling and screaming that something that is already past and over with probably qualifies as insanity. Thus the simple reality of "what is...is," or was may be the best course to take.

When I did was a paramedic for a diversionary hobby my last years of ministry, I saw some  gruesome stuff. My first call came in as a "precipitous birth" meaning if I helped deliver a baby I'd get a Stork Pin. Someone screwed up and when we got there it was chaos. A teen had walked into the living room, spun the cylinder on a pistol, looked to see the bullet wasn't really in the chamber and told the family to watch this.  He did not know cylinders rotated one last time. He was dead before he hit the floor but we had to work as if he wasn't.   I did learn I could get to without passing out and do what needed to be done.  I could never help what happened. But I could help what happened next. Well not for him. 

And so it is with bells that can't be unrung and regrets now past. 

Whatcha think?

PCG Continues Its Control Over Members Lives. Men Are Not Allowed to Have "Me" Time

One of the classic traits of cults is that they seek to separate its followers from family and in doing so keep them occupied at all times.  This can be accomplished by weekly or biweekly bible studies, speech clubs, women's groups, men's groups, teen activities, an hour of prayer and an hour of Bible study, and more. By occupying members time they have no opportunity to become tainted or influenced by the world.

Two of the most abusive Church of God groups that use this tactic is Dave Pack's, Restored Church of God and Gerald Flurry's, Philadelphia Church of God.

On PCG's website, Joel Hilliker has an article up called Men: Report for Duty: Biblical Manhood.

PCG men are being told that they CANNOT under any circumstance have some "me" time.  Forget about joining up with some buddies after a long week of hard work and kicking back for some "me" time. That is selfish!

Isn’t it time you got one for yourself? Indulge. How many advertisements have you seen with this message? Take a break! You’ve worked hard. You deserve this! 

It’s not just in the commercials. It’s in our entertainment, it’s in our workplaces, it’s in our schools, it’s in our leadership—it’s in the air! It’s a powerful and influential satanic attitude that surcharges the atmosphere around us: self-importance, self-promotion, self-serving, self-righteousness—selfishness! 

Men in God’s Church are tempted by this same attitude: Have some “me” time. Check out of your responsibilities for a little while. 

Jesus Christ never did that. 

Christ was on duty—all the time.

Apparently, PCG is under the impression that Jesus never sat down and did nothing after a long day of carpentry work or preaching. God forbid if Jesus kicked back with his apostles and had some wine, olives and some feta on a hot night. With such logic from PCG it has to be a miracle that Jesus even had time to eat or take care of bodily functions.

Hilliker continues:

Here is His perspective: “I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work” (John 9:4). Christ’s life was short, limited in duration. He was urgent about taking full advantage of every moment and every interaction. 

Christ’s supreme example defines biblical manhood. The more Christ-like we become, the more masculine we become. Manliness is next to godliness (just as, for a woman, femininity is next to godliness). 

Like Him, Christian men are always on duty.

If anything symbolizes what being like Christ may be is this:

“Have the same attitude of mind Christ Jesus had: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a human being, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!” Philippians 2:5-8 

Christ came as a servant who stooped down to wash peoples feet. Christ exemplified love as he associated with the lepers, prostitutes, the disenfranchised and ultimately gave his life in love. Jesus work was an incarnational work, something that PCG cannot do since they are too busy worshipping Moses and other Old Testament heroes.

Hilliker continues:

This is the unselfish attitude godly men must have: a vigilant urgency to take action and to work at serving others. You have to pay attention to other people’s lives, and act on what you see.

You may look at tomorrow as just another routine day: pray, study, snag breakfast, endure the workday, unwind at home, watch a show, go to sleep. But Christ in you looks at tomorrow as a deluge of opportunities: What can I do? Who can I help? How much can I give?

One of the problems with this is that PCG men are to "take action" only if it is directed towards PCG leadership and members. All actions are directed inwards, instead of outwards to the world. But even that is conditional, only members in good standing benefit. In doing so the men of PCG can expect to be "deluged" with time-consuming "opportunities."

Don’t underestimate the potential value of every decision, every encounter, every conversation you have! Recognize opportunities to give for what they are. You’ll probably have one as soon as you finish reading this article.

Imagine that if you don't feel like jumping up after reading Hilliker's article how guilty you will feel and less of a man!

To follow Christ’s example and seize that opportunity, you must fight the pull of selfishness and relaxation—and embrace the call of duty!

The question is not whether you have a duty to serve others more than yourself. The question is whether you will fulfill your duty. The more you do, the more God-like you will become, and the more habitual this Christ-like attitude will be.

There you have the moniker of the PCG, the more you do, the more you become like their god.  They sure might be like Moses or some other OT hero, but they sure won't be like Jesus. Works vs grace, the never-ending story of the COG.

So seize the moment!  Be a PCG man!

Many of us intellectually understand and agree with the concept of male Christian leadership. But the harder step is to encounter a day-to-day routine occurrence and actively recognize: I need to use this moment—right now—to express biblical manhood!

Here are the things that manly PCG men can look to as opportunities:

A torrent of opportunities is coming at you. Helping your son with his math homework, approving your daughter’s new dress before she wears it, setting a household rule to unburden your wife, helping your neighbor fix his porch step, knocking out the reports nobody else wants to do at work, holding the door open for the mother of two children at the gas station, skipping the football game to visit an elderly Church member, putting your phone away so you’re not distracted when playing with your children, noting something troubling in your teenager’s voice inflection and following up with him about it, setting rules so that dinner time can be quality family time, choosing a topic to lead in conversation after Sabbath services—the deluge of opportunity never ends. And Christ wants to empower you to fulfill those opportunities.

In the family structure as God designed it, the man is the head of the home and a dynamic force within the family. He has a dominating—not selfishly domineering—personality that stands for the right. He is alertly, actively, intensively interested in his children. He uses his God-given authority to lead in serving and in loving his wife and children. There is just no room for “going on break” as a husband and father! He is never off-duty.

Hilliker then goes into detail about how masculine men in the PCG adhere to the teachings in The Plain Truth About Child Rearing. Yep, the final authority for all masculine men.

Once you give a command, remain on duty. Ensure the child follows through. This must be the case at home, at Sabbath services, in public, everywhere.

“In order to teach your child any of these constructive habits, you will need to apply constant diligence and never-failing attention to duty,” The Plain Truth About Child-Rearing says. “You simply cannot expect to have decent results if you just give your child instructions, and then forget all about the lesson—letting the child get down from the chair when he decides, put up his toys when he gets around to it, or begin to talk when you have told him to be quiet.”

And then, like any good COG writer, masturbation has to enter the picture.  Is Joel trying to tell us something here about himself?  I am sure PCG has more masturbators than any other COG, except for RCG and CCOG.  The more repressed people's lives are the more they find new avenues of satisfaction.

In The Missing Dimension in Sex, Herbert W. Armstrong specifically mentions the possibility of young people developing the habit of masturbation. “This would never be if parents realized their responsibility and were vigilant, ever watchful imperceptibly, and took proper means to protect their children from this curse!” he wrote.

Exercising authority in your children’s lives is not easy—it is labor. It is not a power trip. It is a service. It is for their benefit. And it is your duty.

As a Christian single, you are training for that duty right now by learning to pay attention to others, by learning how to treat women and children with honor, by learning to go after dating and to pay attention to the needs of single ladies, by learning how to serve the widows and the fatherless. These responsibilities also remain after you marry.

In your conversations, look for needs. Ask about things you could help with or find someone to help with. Find things you can pray about. Pay attention! You are on duty!

The duties of a man are constant. They require vigilance. They require you to work the works of Him that sent you, while you can. Be urgent. Recognize the onrushing river of opportunities for what it is. Seize each one. Let God come into people’s lives through you. Express dynamic male leadership. Put biblical manhood into action! Report for duty.

The Book of Acts. Are COG Members To Complete It?

One of the great myths of the Worldwide Church of God was that the Book of Acts is the only book in the Bible without an ending.  There was a reason for that, or maybe a couple of reasons, that the church ministry put forth.  I heard this in Pasadena in class and preached from the pulpit.

Reason 1 (This one I had never heard before, but it does not surprise me)

I also remember hearing from the pulpit at AC BS that the Book of Acts was not complete and that the co-worker letters authored by HWA would be used to complete the book. Can you imagine the grotesque presumption that would lead someone to think that those blatant appeals for money would come up to the standard of the Book of Acts?  (ht: NEO)

Reason 2 

The Book of Acts has no ending because the lives of COG members would be recorded for holding fast to the faith once delivered.  The inspiring stories of church members would be recorded for future generations. 

Can you imagine future generations reading about the corruption and abuse that COG ministers and leaders have dished out on people?  Imagine reading the Acts of Dave Pack, or the Acts of Rod Meredith, or the Actis of Rod McNair, or the Acts of Bob Thiel.  I can just picture people now saying, "I should have chosen the lake of fire over this malarkey!"

Acts only deals with Peter and Paul.  It does not include any other apostles. There is nothing about Bartholomew or of Thomas and his supposed journey to what is now India.  One would think that the stories of the two James who were the first two of the apostles to be martyred would be there.  Nope, not a thing, but yet Herbert Armstrong and Dave Pack's writings will be included.

Imagine reading the Acts of Gerald Waterhouse or Acts of Vic Kubik.  It makes me want to get a bottle of wine and some cheese and crackers and settle in for a good read.   NOT!