Dave Pack: I Will Be Making Earth Shattering Announcements Every Friday Indefinitely

The worlds most important Church of God, lead by the worlds most incredibly intelligent leader, Dave Pack, has given notice that he will be giving earth shattering announcements every Friday until he flees to Petra.

For the last five Fridays in a row The Restored Church of God has made dramatic announcements. These weekly postings will continue indefinitely every Friday! You will want to return each week to see what is being announced.

In another deliberate jab at Rod Meredith, Gerald Flurry and Robin Webber, Dave lets them all know that he is having earth shattering television opportunities while building magnificent HQ buildings.  Those weak impotent little wusses at the PCG, UCG, and LCG are losing money and TV stations while God's most important man is raking the dough in and building the worlds most beautiful campus.

Bear in mind that all of the following additional television expansion, listed momentarily, is being added while we are still building our Headquarters campus without use of bank financing. (We expect to announce next Friday the start of a second building, again without bank financing. We will unveil the building next Friday. A timelapse video of our Hall of Administration will also be posted at that time. And we are on schedule to occupy the “Hall” seven weeks from today.)

The amazing man is also announcing he has started a Chinese language web site geared to the worlds most populated nation.  This is something that the little wusses in the other COG's have failed to do.  "Eat my dust, WIMPS!"

Second, The Restored Church of God has now launched (today) its new Chinese-language website. This adds an eighth language to the Church’s range of translations! For the first time, God’s Church is publishing the true gospel for over 700 million Mandarin Chinese-readers on the Internet worldwide. Four booklets are now available, and additional literature will be added regularly. Revelation 10:11 states that when God’s Church “prophesies again” it is to be “before many peoples, and nations, and tongues, and kings.” This is being done with ever greater power.

Then the apostle/prophet,/pastor general/Chief Overseer/worlds greatest man slaps them all silly with this:

Third, the POWERFUL worldwide expansion of The World to Come™ television broadcast continues with the addition of 187.6 million new television households around the world. God continues to GREATLY bless His Work. We continue exploding forward and rocketing straight up in every regard. PCG, LCG and UCG all are suffering shrinking income and loss of media coverage as a result (having done nothing, COGwa has nothing to lose)—and this will quickly grow much worse, with repercussions in all directions for these rapidly declining organizations.

He's added 187 million households to his number.  However he failed to report only 3 people actually watched the show out of all those millions!

Then to really bitch slap Meredith and crew, he lays out the tens of millions of other households he has now added to his portfolio as Rod and crew loose stations left and right.

The World to Come has now added more coverage in the United States, Canada, Europe, Australia, New Zealand, the Middle East and North Africa—but also South Africa by next week. This is coming just 14 days after a huge announcement on March 8. Perhaps take time to read the list of 203 stations added just two weeks ago.

(A) All across Scandinavia and Europe, The World to Come will reach 113.1 million households on the Gospel Channel. This network is broadcast throughout the continent on satellite, as well as Sky UK and Canal Digital in Norway.

(B) More millions in Australia and New Zealand will be reached through satellite coverage via The Word Network! Also, both TV ONE and Prime TV networks in New Zealand will launch on Sunday, April 7 to a combined 3.1 million households—effectively blanketing that nation three times. These new stations will be available via Freeview, Sky satellite and cable providers across the country. (We expect to announce additional nationwide network coverage in Australia next month or very soon.)

(C) The Middle East and North Africa will also receive new coverage on Arabsat through The Word Network. More than 56 million African and Middle Eastern households can now receive God’s truth! The Word Network now reaches an estimated 610 million households worldwide. (More new broadband coverage on this network reaches the island of Jamaica.)

(D) In South Africa, all subscribers of one network will soon be reached with a Sunday afternoon prime-time slot.

(E) In Canada, through the Winnipeg superstation Joytv11, The World to Come will now be aired to 5 million households (growing to over 8.5 million later this year) via Bell ExpressVu satellite, as well as a variety of cable providers. This complements the 7.4 million subscribers on recently launched Grace TV, who can watch on Shaw Direct satellite, Rogers cable and a variety of other providers. Combining these two stations gives the Work full national coverage across Canada.

(F) In the United States, 16.1 million households have been added through a Sunday morning slot on Retro TV. This unique and rapidly expanding network services viewers in 101 cities. In many areas where antenna service is available, local cable providers re-broadcast the programming content, giving The World to Come even more reach.

In a private meeting with a senior vice president of ION, we just learned that included in our latest national ION Television package is cable coverage in virtually every metropolitan area in the country. This means The World to Come will reach an additional 12.8 million households through cable affiliates where ION Television does not have a local station. We did not realize the enormous scope of what was coming to us when LCG abandoned its ION slot, but also how we would benefit when they abandoned other slots. (The World to Come now reaches almost every U.S. household through either ION Television, The CW Plus, Retro TV, cable affiliates and satellite, but also some independent stations.)

Heretic Church of God Groups Kept Passover On Wrong Night

Those Church of God members who celebrated "Passover" last night, Monday, were only celebrating a bastardized "passover" that was not legitimate in God's sight.

There is only ONE group of Church of God members out there that will be keeping the "Passover" on it's correct night, Tuesday at sundown.

This also means that the apostates in ALL the COG's are also keeping the Days of Unleavened Bread on the wrong days.  Damnable heretics!

Those that kept the "Passover" with the various COG's did not keep it with "like minds" and therefore are guilty of rejecting Jesus Christ.

The key to your comment is: “Like Mind” It is pointless to associate with those who are NOT of like mind with Christ and the Father. We must NOT let “church” become our God and attend to be associated with like minded men, who are not like minded with Christ: WE MUST BE LIKE-MINDED WITH CHRIST AND THE FATHER. James

Those truly enlightened to God's word and who are diligent law keepers know that there is only one group who keeps the correct days.  That is apostle Malm's group.

The apostle writes:

Passover is observed AFTER sunset this Tuesday March 26th evening.  Passover day is Wednesday March 27th.

Brethren, We Are Now Entering The Season of No Doughnuts

Today's your last chance to have a bacon maple doughnut before the Days of Unleavend Bread set in.  

Did you remember to get all the crumbs out of your toaster or did you just throw it in the trash so you can buy another one next week?

Did you check your suit pockets to make sure there is no stray cookie or bread crumb are in there?  That is the favorite excuse ministers come up with every year.  What about your pants cuffs?

Did you deleaven your car?  Every last crumb?

  

Did you move the refrigerator out and clean behind and under it?

Did you go through every single item in our kitchen cupboard checking for some type of leavening agent? 

Did you do the same in your bathroom?

Did you throw out the cat and dog food because it have leavening in it?

What about the Brewers Yeast?

What about the baking soda used for your swimming pool alkalinity?

Did you stock up on "Everything" matzo's and plenty of butter?  Are you planing on eating a piece every day?

Are you sending your kids to school  with turkey matzo sandwiches, or matzo and peanut butter?

Many COGers are very diligent about doing all of these things, yet they are still the same mean nasty people they were before Passover as they lord themselves over the brethren.  They dish out weird and absurd biblical interpretations that are totally irrelevant.  They damn people for not following their magnificent words of wisdom.

This is one season in Armstrongism that I do not miss at all.

Prophet Thiel: Will Obama Be The U.S. President That Causes My Church To Flee To Petra?

The non-ordained self-appointed prophet Thiel is all in atwitter today about President Obama visiting Petra.  The best part about his visit is that a "gentile," in eyes of many Armstrongites, made it to Petra before the chosen church did.  That really must tick off some of them!

The non-ordained prophet writes:

US President Barack Obama visited Petra as part of his Middle East tour:

PETRA, Jordan | Sat Mar 23, 2013

(Reuters) – President Barack Obama marveled at the sights of Jordan’s ancient city of Petra on Saturday as he wrapped up a four-day Middle East tour by setting aside weighty diplomatic matters and playing tourist for a day.  http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/03/23/us-usa-mideast-obama-idUSBRE92M02U20130323

Many of us in the Church of God have long felt that it is possible that Petra in Jordan could be the place that God will protect the Philadelphia Christians during the time of the Great Tribulation (cf. Revelation 3:10). 

Its weird that almost eighty years down the line and Armstrongism is still harping on Petra after one failed prophecy after another.

Like all good prophets, real ones and fake ones, Thiel sets out to scare his members, again.  Obama or another president will cause things to happen that forces the Continuing Ed Church of God to hightail it over to Petra.  As if any Muslim nation is going to open their doors to a bunch of wacky cultists wanting to move there.  Oh, but I forgot.  The king of Jordan was so impressed by Herbert Armstrong that he will bend over backwards and welcome the COG folks with open arms.  Bob, his family and a few henchmen will stay outside Petra in the Marriott while the peons have to struggle to survive inside.

It is interesting that the US president visited Petra as it will be partially policies of leaders like US presidents that will contribute to the need for Philadelphia Christians to flee to a place like Jordan (sin is the actual cause, but it leads to debt and debt-increasing policies).  The amount of US debt increased significantly under the last US President Bush and the current US President Obama.

Philadelphia Church of God Asks: Hey Big Boy, "What's Lurking In Your Pocket?"

The Flurry cult is asking: "What's Lurking In Your Pocket?"

That's a pretty risky question to be asking, particularly for a COG minister, given the peccadillo's of various ministers throughout the years in the COG.  Who can forget the horror stories of the PCG minister who likes to hang out with PCG youth at summer camp in his bike shorts.

Sadly though, this is another swipe at PCG youth.  Apparently none of the youth in the PCG can be trusted. Sexting naked pictures back and forth and looking at porn seems to be common place with a lot of youth today, so Lord Six Pack and the PCG assumes their youth are too.

Usually when these kind of issues come up in church publications or in articles it is because some minister has been having problems in this area (I am not implying that the author of this article has these problems.)  Is a PCG minister sending pictures of his privates to others, like several Senators have done in the last couple of weeks, or are they incessantly looking at porn on their phones?

The author of this article claims that Smartphones are now tools of Satan to destroy young peoples minds.

Facebook. Twitter. Tumblr. Snapchat. Instagram. Does anything stand out to you? Doesn’t it seem that everyone is using these apps to put their social life on the Internet?! The way people access these programs has developed over the last few years from desktop computers to the pocket cell phone. Most cell phones today are literally miniaturized computers in your pocket. It is also a window to a very evil world.

The smart phone has not only become a status symbol, but many teens, and perhaps even you, view it as an absolute requirement to be accepted among your friends. Do you feel this pressure? To not own a smart phone is a virtual social disaster. Some teens want one so badly that they will even steal or commit murder to get their hands on one.

If you own one of these phones, or even if you wish you had one, I have a question for you to think about: Do you have the kind of character to use it properly? Many adults don’t. Many adults use their smart phones in a very wrong way. This problem can affect anyone.

Apparently no parent in the PCG has been able to raise their child to have values and not do these kind of things.  Armstrongism has never trusted it's kids.  Perhaps if they did there would not have been as many issues as there have been in the COG youth over the years.

Like everything in Armstrongism it has to be tied to sex.  Sex permeates the church, the ministry and  its articles and videos.

The most evil fruit borne from the misuse of these phones is sexual in nature. Whole dating patterns of teenagers are being formed and shaped around smart phones. Teenagers use their cell phones to send one another photographs and videos so they can “hook-up” with a teen of the opposite sex. And most parents in the world just go along with it.

Lewd teenage videos and photos have gone viral in schools and communities, to the great embarrassment and harm of those involved. If those photos or videos are uploaded to the Internet, the content is pretty much impossible to remove. God covers sin, but the Internet puts it out there for everyone to see and revel in.

For any youth in the PCG that is doing this they are now expected to immediately run to their parents and minister to confess.   Going to their parents is the best and only step they should take.  Going to the ministry is not!  There have been countless horror stories of Imperial High students  and Ambassador students counseling with ministers.  They ended up asking the kids deeply personal questions about their sex life.  All the juicy details would be dragged out of the kids.  A couple of ministers even masturbated under their desks during these counseling sessions.  Given the low quality of the ministerial peoples that defected to PCG over the years, I would be very leery about counseling with any of them!

The other thing the youth need to consider that every single thing they tell the ministry is written down and placed in a file.  There are no secrets when you really get down to it.

Parents, you work with your children and don't allow the ministry to stick their sweaty big noses into your children's business!