Tuesday, January 8, 2013

"Prophet" Thiel Admits He Is A Poor Speaker

Here we go again, another splinter in the hundreds and hundreds that have whored themselves off the mother church.  Here we go again with another church service that is contains nothing original.  It's the same mind-numbingly boring format.  Plus, it seems that prophet Thiel is admitting he is NOT a good speaker.  That's not a good way to start a new splinter cult by admitting that you have no speaking ability.

Our plan was to try to upload church services within a couple of days of videoing them. Unlike some other groups, we really will spend almost no time doing any editing, but as we have no hired staff, this seems to be the best way to handle weekly services. So, please realize that God does not always call leaders who are the most polished speakers (Exodus 4:10-11).

However, once we actually tried to tape the music, YouTube, and sermon, we ran into a variety of technical problems with cameras etc.  So the new plan will be to ask the services be handled as follows (realizing that there may need to be modifications:
  • 2-3 hymns (we are using the 1974 Bible Hymnal from the old WCG)
  • Opening prayer by an appropriate male  (Dan Mattson, grandson of the Herbert W. Armstrong opened here in Arroyo Grande today).
  • Sermonette (short 8-15 minute subject) or Bible New Prophecy YouTube (which is what we watched today).
  • Announcements and one hymn.
  • Sermon (which for most will be a recorded one)
  • Final hymn.
  • Closing prayer by an appropriate male.
It is likely that I may have to do today’s sermon over again and simply have that placed online as opposed to the entire service as originally hoped for.

Eventually, we will need to put together a Passover service and give additional consideration to how to handle Holy Day services.


Anonymous said...

I don't necessarily object to sitting around for a little while listening to a poor speaker as long as his material is outstanding and keeps me riveted.

However, this entire schedule - starting with the depressing Dwight Armstrong hymns, a sermonette of "Bible Prophecy", and a Thiel Sermon - well, if it's anything like the material at COGWriter news - all I can say is:


Actually, this "church" might win the most boringest church of God EVER. You could never keep my attention with such dated and incorrect nonsense - especially delivered in Bob Newhart Style.

Ending it with "ohhh Looorrd Gooddd... Reebbuuukke me Noot In Anngeerrr...." I'd be running out of there at Warp 9! Im tired just thinking about it!!!

Byker Bob said...

Bob doesn't allow open comment on his blog, but some of us have tried in the past to reach him through other venues which we know he follows. This was the case following the tsunami when I asked a very telling question which had grave implications regarding the prophetic role of Armstrongists.

Check out http://www.cogwriter.com/rcm/htm

Go down about 18-19 paragraphs until you see the name "Amos".
You'll get a pretty good idea as to how Thiel regards prophecy. Pretty loose! Almost anyone can be a prophet by Thiel's standards. Problem is, this being the case, how is a prophet special in any way? And, why would we regard this type of prophet as being a mentor, spiritual leader, or personal guru?


Anonymous said...

This is what you get when you panic when not elevated to the status of Prophet and bail out needing sabbath services and a FOT along with a PO Box and the legal right to deduct tithes by the end of the week.

You'd think he would have seen this coming. :0

Anonymous said...

I think Prophet Thiel by faith should rent out a Giant Sports Arena for the FOT. And reserve a block of hotels. Do what hasnt been done since 1995. Then see if 4,000 people are brought to the Feast.

Me thinks he would have a very lonely big screen to not watch football ;)

Anonymous said...

Bob crows " Opening prayer by an appropriate male (Dan Mattson, grandson of the Herbert W. Armstrong opened here in Arroyo Grande today)."

Now there's an appropriate male if ever there was one! Sounds like Bob is proud to have an appropriate male and COG celeb to ask God to "please bless this service and inspire the speaker," alas, only to have Bob realize he better do the sermon over again. God was busy last Saturday and unable to inspire and bless "The Big Ditch" Arroyo Grande!

Lol This is getting hilarious.


Anonymous said...

All opening prayers were always the same. I don't think I've ever heard anything beyond the same formula in a COG. I don't care if it's the grandson of HWA or a first time opening prayer giver, they're all the same. Well, that is unless you bow so low you're gonna almost swallow the microphone or turn your prayer into a sermonette. ;) I was always just ready to bolt and was in fact reaching for my stuff before the last "Amen" :D

Mr. John Celerybutt said...

Does this blog accept bull crap from interested bystanders?

Richard said...

If Dr. Thiel is such a poor speaker, why did he give sermons at a few LCG Feast sites in recent years?

He said so on COGWriter. Unless that was deleted during one of his recent "changes."

Head Usher said...

Sounds like the newest prophet since Jebus is totally unprepared to be an entertainer.

It's one thing to sit in your den and write blog entries and books until it's coming out your ears. It's another thing entirely to try to run another (corrupt) COG organization and have to put on "The god Show" every Saturday. If you bore them to tears and fail to inspire them to feel that they're getting "fed" every week, your retention rate is going to go down the toilet.

That might be why he only prophesied about the first 30 days of his organization, but after that, all bets are off! Next headline: "Continuing COG Discontinued Until Further Notice."

Anonymous said...


1) Does Dr. Thiel have any serious theological training from a real university?

2) Is Dr. Thiel knowledgable of crisis counseling, or how to do it? Can he handle it if there are emergency situations? Is he aware of the laws of being in a position of trust? Can he successfully counsel?

3) Is Dr. Thiel now an ordained minister, or is he running his ship without any crudentials from any organization whatsoever?

4) Is Dr. Thiel crudentialed to perform marriages, funerals, and other clergy matters, or will these functions have to be outsourced?

5) Will he be accountable as to his income and expenses, file regular audits and be in compliance with regulations for his business? Will his expenditures be available online?

6) Does this strike you of an organization that has been started from scratch without clear insight, vision, planning, or foresight?

Anonymous said...

7) Does holding internet sermons and video chats even count as a "church"? Does Thiel even have a real congregation of individuals?

8) Finally, is Thiel biblically qualified, according to the teachings of Timothy, to be in a position of eldership?

Anonymous said...

Whoever said this last week is a genius: "When a Christian reads the Bible, he sees writings about other people, which he uses to judge himself.

When a narcissist reads the Bible, he sees writings about himself, which he uses to judge other people."

And so is the dude who said "A true Philadelphian would never boast about being one."

Questeruk said...

Bob Thiel’s ministerial credentials seem to be that he asked a LCG to be anointed for a physical problem (i.e. anointed for healing), and the LCG minister accidentally fumbled his words, and anointed Bob as a prophet instead!

That was my reading of Bob Thiel’s explanation. Did I get it wrong?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Richard said...
If Dr. Thiel is such a poor speaker, why did he give sermons at a few LCG Feast sites in recent years?

Perhaps, true to human nature, BT has read enough of his awesomeness and subconsciously is throwing in the "I am not a good speaker," as did Moses/Jeremiah and Paul, who we all know were really awesome.

Anonymous said...

2-3 hymns (we are using the 1974

Bible Hymnal from the old WCG)
Opening prayer by an appropriate male (Dan Mattson, grandson of the Herbert W. Armstrong opened here in Arroyo Grande today).

Sermonette (short 8-15 minute subject) or Bible New Prophecy YouTube (which is what we watched today).

Announcements and one hymn.

Sermon (which for most will be a recorded one)

Final hymn.

Closing prayer by an appropriate male.

I bet God/Christ is sooooooooooooo tired of this format that it will be the first thing that gets changed in the Kingdom.

Actually since all the "climbing through the windows leap.." , "death shall them seize.." and "blow the horn let Zion here" ing, will be over, there won't be anything to talk or sing about anymore.

Anonymous said...

I mean , "Let Zion hear..." Actually I have seen Mt. Zion and it is rather small and looks like a hill you might build a dirt bike track on. I have found Israelis exaggerate.

DennisCDiehl said...

I think I know human nature well enough and ministerial wanna be natures even more, including the need for the self important to appear humble...maybe it's just my distrusting nature in those that put themselves out there as more special and insightful about the unknowable than others.

I think I see a pattern here:

MOSES Exodus 6:

12 But Moses answered, “Lord, the Israelites refuse to listen to me. So surely Pharaoh will also refuse to listen. I am a very bad speaker.”

13 But the Lord talked with Moses and Aaron and commanded them to go and talk to the Israelites and to Pharaoh, the king of Egypt. He commanded them to lead the Israelites out of the land of Egypt."


6 Then said I, Ah, Lord God! behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child.

7 But the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak."

APOSTLE PAUL 2 Corinthians 11:

5 I do not think I am in the least inferior to those “super-apostles.”[a] 6 I may indeed be untrained as a speaker,

12 And I will keep on doing what I am doing in order to cut the ground from under those who want an opportunity to be considered equal with us in the things they boast about.

(I like that "cut the ground from under.." attitude lol)

2 Corinthians 10:10

10 For some say, “His letters are weighty and forceful, but in person he is unimpressive and his speaking amounts to nothing.”

The Apostle Paul especially had a tendency to both brag and denigrate himself depending on the audience. He bounced between being the Greatest Apostle and the Least of the Apostles. He even said he had to beat himself , literally I suspect, to keep himself in line.

Perhaps it is just me, but those overwhelmed with religion and God Haunted as well as special and "set apart" struggle with these issues and tell stories on both ends of the spectrum to let everyone know they are both powerful and special, humble and meek .

All the COG gurus pull this stuff from time to time and I suspect it is combat the criticism they get often for coming across as know it alls.

DennisCDiehl said...

The fact that Paul chaffed under the idea there were "Super Apostles" is telling. That was Paul's view. I doubt Peter, James and John, who Paul was probably referring to thought that of themselves. It was Paul's inferiority that he reveals over and over in his writings speaking. In Galatians he called them , "reputed to be Pillars." Again this Paul's view not P,J and J's.of themselves.

I think we can say we see this tendency in all who compete with those they feel are superior to them when they wish to be superior or at least co equal with those they think know and admire.

I would try not to judge this, but I see this trait in BT's writing and self views just as I see my own tendencies in my own. It's just what humans do.

Herbert Armstrong did the same thing rocking back and forth between Super Apostle and humble Grandpa everyone could like. Again..it is just what we do to deal with the curse of specialness one feels whether valid or imagined.

Douglas Becker said...

My cat beat Thiel to it, has a better website, is better organized and has Armstrongism down pat.

There is no need for any other Supreme Leader of The Supreme Cult after Mikey got his paws on Armstrongism!

Thiel is irrelevant -- beaten by his own game by a feline.

[Mikey has just informed me that if Thiel doesn't cease and desist, Mikey may just bring back his blog on TSCULT to begin insulting Thiel again! Thiel, you have been warned! Remember how painful it was for you last time and remember your email to Mikey!]

Anonymous said...

All the Great Ones claim they are poor speakers and misunderstood. It's a smokescreen to mask and divert criticism of awesomeness sooz the two or three faithful don't give up.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps he could get some musically skilled eunuchs up there to Arroyo Grande for the special music. I'm told that eunuchs can make beautiful music with the anal violin, and this could set up some incredible symbolism with regard to Thiel's new prophetic ministry. I mean, he's going to be talking out of his ass anyway, right?

~Miguel de la Rodente

Anonymous said...


No negro spirituals being sung? Forget it!

Joe Moeller
Cody , WY

Anonymous said...

"(we are using the 1974 Bible Hymnal from the old WCG)"

Oh, brother.

And special thanks to 1st anon for putting THAT particular ditty back in my head. I'm saddened to think of how many hours of childhood I must have lost singing the same dirges over and over that all went "Boo hoo, the world is so full of wicked people that think we're nuts, I can't wait for God to kill them all."

Anonymous said...

"'Prophet' Thiel Admits He Is A Poor Speaker"

Don't worry about Bob Thiel being a poor speaker. The real problem is that he is a poor thinker.

Studying Mayan prophecies, Kenyan prophecies, Catholic prophecies and any other pagan prophecies will never make anyone a true prophet of God. Anyone wanting to know about prophecy would have to study the Bible, and even then it appears that God would have to open their mind to understand it.

Having other people trying to be "kind" to a spiritual retard and flatter him that he might be a prophet will never make anyone a true prophet of God. Other people do not get to choose who will be a true prophet. God has to choose the person and reveal the prophecy to him. He can not just make up stuff on his own off the top of his head. True prophecy never had its origin in the will of man.

Prophets do not get to choose themselves to be prophets--except for the false ones! Anyone can become a lying, false prophet. Whether that will be profitable for them seems to depend on their marketing skills and on how much help they receive from the forces of darkness.

Roderick Meredith is correct that Bob Thiel has begun to think of himself in terms that are NOT realistic. It is surprising how many people on the COG scene can turn out to be so unbalanced and ignorant of biblical teachings.

Anonymous said...

what is this with all the emphasis, bold text, capitals.....somehow it reminds me of 1920's advertising or perhaps the publications of a certain church predicting DOOM AND GLOOM and they're still doing it I hear. On the computer screen it doesn't work, now I have to turn my brightness down. Ok modern ideas on writing are that the force of the writing is sufficient emphasis.

Anonymous said...

Sadly, in most cases, it would be far more edifying to listen to Armstrong preachers fizzing off in the bathroom (i.e, talking out the "other end") than it is to listen to one of their sermons.