Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Dennis Muses: Pooped Out On Popes

Pooped Out On Popes
Noticing is Not Scoffing
jesus return photo: Jesus return Jesus_returns.jpg
When I was 14, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would begin in 1972 and Jesus would return in 1975
jesus return photo: Jesus return JESUS-10.jpg
When I was 25, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would begin in 1985 and Jesus would return in 1988
jesus return photo: come Lord Jesus jesus_return.jpg
Then, when I was 48, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would begin in 2008 and Jesus would return in 2011
christ return photo: christ's return jesus20returns.jpg
When I was 58, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would start in 2013 and Jesus would have to return by 2016
christ return photo: Jesus return 09_Christ_returns.jpg
Now I am 63 and someone, who thinks they know, is telling me the "Tribulation" can't begin until 2018 and Jesus would then return in 2021
Banned by HWA! Books, News and Observations About Armstrongism and
I have lived through 5 Last Popes
I am pooped out on Popes
Seeing Squares Crochet Dishcloth Pattern | Petals to PicotsPetals
I'm seeing a pattern here...
“The future is uncertain but the end is always near.”
Jim Morrison


Corky said...

The end is always "near" indeed, and has been near for thousands of years but, you know, near to us is different than "near" is to God. After all, a thousand years is just one day to God and we can put off the end indefinitely.

The problem is, why even mention that the return of Jesus, the end, and judgment day was "at hand" when it really wasn't? Why not just say that the end of the world was way, way, way off into the future instead of saying that that generation would not pass away until all things written were fulfilled?

Better yet, why didn't Jesus just say..."I don't know but it's gonna happen some day"? Since the NT says that they knew they were living in "the last days" it meant "days", not centuries or thousands of years. People need to wake up - it was a failed prophecy.

Byker Bob said...

Corky, the reason they don't wake up is that they have an alternative explanation. And, they believe it.

The end in our times was always a part of Armstrongism that I did not want to see come to pass, and I can't believe that I was the only WCG member to feel that way. If you live in Haiti, you would probably be hungering for someone to press the reset button. But, living in the USA, most of us (absenting Armstrongism replicating third world conditions in your lifestyle) have expectations of a fairly good life.

Logic and human nature would normally dictate that when something like the disappointment of 1975 hit, people would have been happily singing "Won't Get Fooled Again". And, probably most of the members did, until the ministers picked up the broken pieces of the bully club and started beating them over the head with it yet again.


Anonymous said...

And all of the above was NOT from Herbert Armstrong. Others yes, Herbert Armstrong NO.

Anonymous said...

"... why even mention that the return of Jesus, the end, and judgment day was "at hand" when it really wasn't?"

That is exactly the same question that Plato addressed in his 37 volume set on "The Philosopher King Herbert".

That question is SO deep you need a team of 4000 philosophers of religion (or one David Pack) to answer it.

The answer is ... (drum roll) ...: because Jesus had his head up his ass!

Anonymous said...

"Corky, the reason they don't wake up is that they have an alternative explanation. And, they believe it."

Cork, old boy, the reason Bob does not wake up is because he has found Jesus. Get it?

Anonymous said...


Armstrongism was filled with these dumbass predictions. I listened to this crap for decades. Besides, the popes don't go around predicting stupid dates like Armstrongite ministers do.

DennisCDiehl said...

Exactly right Corky. One can see the evolution of sure return soon in the NT through soon doesn't mean that soon to blaming those who notice and calling them scoffers. Soon then turns into "one soon is as a thousand soons and a thousands soons as one" or something like that.

Head Usher said...

"And all of the above was NOT from Herbert Armstrong. Others yes, Herbert Armstrong NO."


Oh, please! From it's inception with William Miller and the Great Disappointment of 1844, this is exactly what Adventism, more or less, has always been about, the idea that the "advent" is around every corner. HWA, not unlike Miller, was on the more extreme side of Adventism. The difference between Miller and HWA was that Miller had a conscience, and after getting it wrong once decided to quit the prophecy business. Not so with HWA!

HWA's entire "ministry" was a litany of doom, gloom, and end-of-the-world fear-mongering to hold the attention of gullible people and keep them sending in their penitent indulgences in advance of a "day of the lord" that was always just "a few years" away, when all their worldly possessions would be "stripped away" anyway. Might as well send it in, in the hopes of buying some divine favor with it! Right? Meanwhile, HWA was building a campus in tribute to himself and living high on the hog on all those indulgences.

"...the year 1936 will see the end of the Times of the Gentiles...quickly after that time, we may expect to see the heavenly signs of the sun and moon becoming dark, the stars falling.... which shall be followed by the Day of the Lord." —HWA, 1934

"...Armageddon, we believe, must be at least three or four years away..." —HWA, 1940

" a few years NONE OF US will be living in our present homes—EVERYTHING material we possess now will be swept away from will strike DURING THIS PRESENT GENERATION—it cannot now be more than A FEW YEARS..." —HWA, 1947


"God prophecies that finally, within the next fifteen years, fully ONE THIRD of our whole population will die of disease and famine." —HWA, 1957

"I say to YOU, now, that your money—your home—every material thing you have—will be taken from you SOON—probably in 12 to 13 years, certainly in 15 or less!" —HWA, 1959

"Somewhere along about seven to ten years from now...drought, epidemic of disease, will reap a mountain harvest of death across North America—and in Britain." —HWA, 1963

"We are in the grand smash climax—only six more years left." —HWA, 1965

"The 'Day of the Eternal'—a time foretold in more than thirty prophecies—is going to strike between 5 and 10 years from now!" —HWA, 1967

"There is very little time remaining. You now know only a minority of humanity will remain alive just a few years from now." —HWA, 1969

"During this generation--within 60 to 90 years or less from 1927—Christ will come again..." —HWA, 1977

"The actual movement of world events as prophesied WARNS US that all this MAY now occur in the decade we entered day before yesterday--and, if delayed past 1990, most certainly during the decade of the 90s." —HWA, 1980

"...And, secondly, to reveal—preserved in writing for us TODAY—what is to happen "in the latter days"—actually within the next two decades—THIS LAST HALF OF THE TWENTIETH CENTURY!" —HWA, 1985

For this an more, see ESN's "Did Herbert Armstrong Set Dates?"

Anonymous said...

Thanks for listing those, Head Usher.

My theory is that the "facepalm emoticon" was invented by someone who heard someone claim that HWA never set dates.

Byker Bob said...

Basically, the only way to take ACOG prophecies is to let them simply stand as diarrhetorical statements.


Anonymous said...

You must live pathetic lives while in the state you are in. The blind will lead the blind. No light here, just darkness with the father of it. I pity you. Such a waste of life, that could of been used for the good, instead of this useless pig slop.(in that I don't mean just this post, the entire blog and those who wallow in it)Such a waste of good talent being used for Satan's Jesuit deception.

Byker Bob said...

Anonymous 8:57, do you mean to imply that it is a waste of talent to debunk the books of Alexander (pigslop?) Hislop, whose writings and methodology no bonifide historians find credible? Are we wasting our talents refuting a racist theory called British Israelism? Is it a waste of time to carefully and meticulously catalogue the false prophecies of Herbert W. Armstrong, or the statements he made and signed "In Jesus Name" which later turned out later to be false?

Or how about noting examples where authority has been applied in cruel and arbitrary ways, resulting in death, financial ruin, or otherwise diminished lives? Is pointing these things out really your idea of the blind leading the blind?

Your Satan detector is unfortunately either damaged or broken. You may need a new one. Or, stick around and perhaps some of the talented crew here can help you repair yours!