Sunday, October 21, 2018

What do GTA, Urantia, Proctor and Gamble, Indians, Hearts, and Cremation have to do with ANYTHING a Christian needs to worry about?

Obviously shocked to see the ragged and bleached out 1980's curtains.


How can a week go by without snickering at our resident self-appointed false prophet?  God's most special man to ever exist in human history (after Dave Pack) has released his latest video for his faithful to listen to at their weekly "sabbath" service of the improperly named "continuing" Church of God.

Doubly blessed Bob Thiel exhibits, once again, why he does not bother to really research scripture for a sermon on one topic.  He claims his members have sent in questions to his church on a vast number of subjects and it is his duty to answer all of those questions.  It is all a load of Armstrongite doo-doo.  All Thiel has done is use old reprint articles of the Worldwide Church of God letter answering department.  

It is all painfully obvious when you see all of the topics he covers in one sermon:

In this sermon, Dr. Thiel answers questions that have been submitted to the Church of God on many topics, such as: Is cremation acceptable for Christians? 
Can you wear garments of mixed fabrics? 
Does Romans 14:5-6 eliminate Holy Days? 
How should Christians dress? 
Is it right to have pictures of Jesus? 
Does Matthew 27:5 contradict Acts 1:18-19? 
What happened to Garner Ted Armstrong? 
Can you use a heart symbol? 
Should you trust 'The Urantia Book'?
What about dinosaurs and the age of the world? 
What are the origins of Native Americans, often called Indians? 
Can you use Proctor and Gamble products? 
Does 1 Kings 8:9 contradict Hebrews 9:4? 
Who is the 'elect lady' of 2 John 1? 
Was Abraham a Jew? 
What is a Hebrew? 
What was Ambassador Foundation for? 
Is 'Amen' pagan? 
Dr. Thiel goes through scriptures, facts, COG documents, and historical information to provide answers.
Are we expected to believe that his African members care about the silly questions of first world Americans? Do the handful of his American followers even care?





24 comments:

nck said...

I usually leave the poking of fun of Mr Thiel to you guys.
I would like to make a case for new and creative updated set of questions.


Is cremation acceptable for christians or should they pass away first?
Can you wear garments made in fabrics by people of mixed race?
How should Christians undress?
Is it right to take pictures of Jesus?
Did the Romans eliminate Holy Days or just the Celts?
Did Garner Ted have a happy ending?
Can Christians wear a Purple Heart?
Should Procter & Gamble open new markets in Africa or leave it to Unilever?
Was the "elect lady' of Chinese origins?
How do the people of India call the native Americans?
Was Alfred Heineken a 'He brew"? And is it politically correct nowadays to adress a person as a He Brew or a She Brew or Xbrew?
Is Amy pagan?

nck

Anonymous said...

Here are some more questions for Bitter Bwana Bob to answer:

• If HWA was wrong about there being no prophets in the end-time NT church, what else might he have been wrong about?

• Is it wrong to waste money on naturopathy instead of in trusting God to heal you?

• Why do you make yourself look so stupid by not acknowledging that many of your African fund-recipients are scamming you?

• Why have you not spoken out against Rugby with the same fervor you have attacked American Football? Are you compromised by Ephraimite donors?

• Have you considered the medical benefits of testosterone supplements?

Hoss said...

Well do I remember, on a now-retired blog, how GTA gave Bob the "no comment" to his phone call about HWA's alleged incest. Although GTA had revealed bringing up the incest during his final encounter with his father, he felt there was no need to discuss it with a lowly LCG member.
I listened to this and a few other snippets as Bob read from his AC book of answers. One that is never answered correctly is "mixed fabrics", and I've heard many speculations on it. Ask an Orthodox rabbi, and he'll tell you don't mix wool and linen because that was reserved for the Aaronic priesthood. No, they don't make "an inferior cloth" or cause cancer!

DennisCDiehl said...

I was hoping Bob would answer the question was it appropriate to pop popcorn during the Days of Unleavened Bread or is that a kind of puffed upedness?. That would also lead me to wonder if it is ok to add air to one's tires during Holy Week.

FFS said...

In all the years of going to wwcg, I really don't recall there ever being a "Christian" sermon preached. They were history lessons, lectures on law-keeping, lectures on what hq wanted us to do or not do, seminars on sending in money, speeches bragging about hwa's wealth, science lessons (at the feast one time a lecture was given about different dimensions and speculation on how these dimensions aided in "miracles". This lecture was called Toodie, or 2-D). In my opinion, Theil is just following what he learned, only ten times worse. Instead of making a lecture (I refuse to use the word "sermon") on one topic, he tries to cram them all in one monologue. Of course he has to use old literature. I mean, how can you talk on a subject (Jesus) you know nothing about? "Sermons" were never preached. Just my two-cents worth.

Anonymous said...

The answers to all of these questions are totally predictable for anyone familiar with Armstrongism. Using the internal jargon of the movement, this is "milk". It is like the old Friday night "Bible Study" format, only made into a sermon, since Bob doesn't have regularly meeting congregations that would fill a rented beer hall as they did during the WCG golden era.

Unknown said...

Questions for Thiel ... THAT MUST BE ANSWERED!

* Can you brush your teeth on the Day of Atonement?

* Did Adam have a Belly Button?

* Can a church member join Amway?

* Did the Armstrongs use "Viagra"?

* Are the Tooth Fairy and Ground Hogs day "Pagan"?

* Is it wrong to have legitimate photographs of Jesus taken by the apostles?

* Do I have to deleaven my colon before the "Days of Unleavened Bread?"

* Is gay divorce and remarriage allowed in the church?

SHT said...

I too have a few questions for Bob.

1. Why are you off center with the curtains? Very, very disconcerting when it comes to aspect/ratio and general aesthetic quality. This bugs me to no end.

2. Why did you thrust a book in the faces of your viewership, thereby obscuring yourself? Do you thrust vitamins and health foods at your customers in the store? Do you treat your viewers differently then your customers? If so, what does that say?

3. Where did you learn the art of trying to cram 30 topics into one talk? What you are giving is not sermons. What you are trying to do is mold people into your beliefs on every subject, because you feel you know better than they do. By the way. You don't.

4. Since all you are doing is reading old WCG literature as your answers, why not just refer them to the article?

5. When's the next time you are going to try to convince people you are something which you clearly are not? Regardless of what you are trying to convince people of, you were NOT ordained, you were merely a LAY member, and now you are PLAYING church.

6. How about a whole sermon on Jesus, Matthew 25, Romans 8, a study on what He accomplished, without any reference to Herbert Armstrong, or his exegesis of scripture?

7. Where did you learn the art (or lack of art) in gesturing?

8. Pier One Imports has some excellent book cases. They will be straight and aesthetically pleasing.

9. Bed Bath and Beyond has curtains and drapes that are updated. They will be modern and visually clean. They also won't be ragged or bleached.

10. Walmart sells Bean-o for a few bucks at Walmart. Bean-o helps greatly with digestive issues and may help eliminate and potential "Feedback issues".

11. Men's Wearhouse sells quality suits. You can get a nice one for 200.00.

I say these things because appearance and quality are two of the most concerned elements of presentation according to your mentor. If he is of any concern to you, you would know this and emulate.





Anonymous said...

Sadly and of course, Jesus says it's ok to mix a variety of clothing ingredients.

According to Jesus, it's ok to eat a muffaletta while wearing poly/cotton pants with a YKK zipper while reading both the Bible and the Tripitakas.

Go figure!

Dumbhead said...

Connie,

Interesting about Adam. Also did Eve have a belly button? Also Adam and Eve were the only humans without a childhood. They missed all the fun! Also no human parents.

Dumbhead said...

Don't want to sound dumb but what an I missing about Proctor and and Gamble? I have been looking at a rice cooker that may be made by them. Was it made by pagans?

Anonymous said...

What happened to the sources of Prophet Bob's strange "off-stage" noises and voices that we've heard in previous talks of his?

Has he locked those sources in closets- or in a basement dungeon?

Is it time to call the FBI to investigate?

James said...

What's really behind those tacky curtains?

https://hwarmstrong.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/behind-the-scenes-ccog.png

Anonymous said...

@ 9:51 AM, he followed the PCG example and left the kid in a shopping mall.

Anonymous said...

Bob is filming in a sleazy motel room again.

Anonymous said...

There's something mentally wrong with him. Crappy curtains, crooked bookcases, doors behind him, more cheap curtains. All the feedback from Banned, yet no changes.
There's literally something wrong with this guy.
I'm beginning to wonder whether it's prudent for Banned to leave him alone.

Anonymous said...

Is it just my eyewash, or does Bob have that deer in the headlights look? I'm not complaining. That goes with all the rest of his symptoms and thought patterns.

Anonymous said...

@ Connie and Dumbhead,

Speaking of Adam and Eve, I would like to know if the forbidden fruit was actually a box of Froot Loops? Maybe it was really Toucan Sam and not a serpent who tempted them; you know those colorful frosty coated Froot Loops are hard to resist.

Craig

Anonymous said...

Maybe you all should get a life instead of pissing & moaning about how you have been "hurt" by these Armstrong loving bellheads.

Anonymous said...

@ 5:07 PM, I realize it was different for you as the child of a minister, but your rush to invalidate other people's experiences is good evidence that you were at one point trained well as an Armstrong loving bellhead.

SHT said...

5:07

And yet you are here just like us, commenting away. Live life, if you choose to! We all have the freedom to do what we please to do. We choose to help others see what's really going on. By the way, this has to be "Get A Life" Comment #47 here at Banned. If you want to go live life, live it! love it! Enjoy it!

If our comments offend you, there's a very simple solution.

Don't read them.






Hoss said...

Maybe you all should get a life

We have. And just as people like Bob made starting and controlling a COG their hobby, our hobby is critiquing them.

Anonymous said...

5.07 PM
We get that comment like clockwork. In summary, former members have been given a life sentence. Which is why similar blogs from former JWs and others.

Ronco said...

"There's something mentally wrong with him. Crappy curtains, crooked bookcases, doors behind him, more cheap curtains. All the feedback from Banned, yet no changes."

Reminds me of a couple of verses from James...

"Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like."