Silly COG Publications

I honestly don't think the editors of this sad little magazine realized how silly this headline looks with the picture they included.  Are they implying that the Ambassador Auditorium Lake is the fountain of Living Waters?

We have  had a lot of fools over the years that attributed all kinds of sacred things to the building.  We had the story promoted by a minister that the invading armies of Germany would be so awestruck with the Pasadena campus that when they invaded Pasadena they would use the College as the German HQ for the occupation.  They would be so frightened by the Auditorium inscription and the other 'godly' things on the campus that they would be afraid to damage any of the property. Therefore, God's House would be preserved into the millennium and HWA and crew could come back and use the campus as the HQ for the restoration of the bombed out United States as they instituted the 1,000 years of rule by COG members who were now gods.

Then there was the fool that claimed the egret fountain was going to come alive. Four of the egrets would fly up to each corner of the Auditorium and pick it up.  The fifth egret would fly in front of the Auditorium as they flew it to Petra. People actually left the church and started following this fool.  Now the egrets have been painted white and are the mascot of a Charismatic Pentecostal personality cult.  Some things never change......

Spinning Scandals

Here is a great post on Stuff Fundies Like about how fundamentalists (and we can include legalists) can spin church controversies by trivializing the problem, claiming the leader is a good man with years of good things to look upon, that there is more hidden information to emerge that will change the situation tot he better, and then circling the wagons by blaming others for the problems.  Of course, this does not sound like ANYTHING that ever went on in Armstrongism, does it?

I think this is the unwritten creed of Armstrongism and all legalistic fundies out there.  If it weren't, then we would not have men like Flurry, Meredith, Pack, Coulter, Weinland and others leading the 600+ harlot daughters of Armstrongism.  But, since it is a vital part of Armstrongism, it allows these men to still function and lead their little cults.

Spinning Scandals

 

(I wrote this in the comments for the last post but I figured it really deserved its own post)
There is a proven four-step method to spinning any scandal that arises in fundamentalism. Observe these well and no scandal is too large, no outrage to unbearable, no offense is too great to be withstood.

1. Admit the problem in terms that make it seem trivial.  Concede that "everything wasn’t perfect” or that “yes, we have a few problems.” That problem may be anything from grand larceny to a double homicide but hey nobody’s perfect, right? We all have our little mistakes. AND YOU’RE NOT PERFECT EITHER!

2. Defend the man involved.  He’s a good man. He’s God’s man. He’s a great man. He’s our man. Quote his years in the ministry and the personal impact he’s had on your life as you’ve spent your whole life knowing him. (If the man in question happens to be a woman you won’t be defending her anyway so the point is moot.)

3. Claim that there is more hidden information yet to be learned that will cast this situation in a totally different light. “There are facts about this that have yet to be made know, and once they are that child porn found on our pastor’s computer will have a perfectly reasonable explanation.” Do this even if the rock solid evidence so far is completely damning. Even if this alleged information never surfaces assure everyone that you know someone who knows someone who knows there’s more to the story.

4. Circle the wagons. Invoke a defense of the faith, God, Liberty, and the American way. Make defending your man an issue of defending against liberalism, communism, and everything evil. Insinuate that everyone who doesn’t defend him is 1)bitter  2)jealous or 3)a member of the Illuminati.

Note these steps well. These arguments happen the same way every single time.
Posted by Darrell

Darrell's post is tied in to a story he has been following about a Baptist fundamentalist preacher who raped a women and then committed suicide in jail.  He has a link to the story here, then he has a link to another story here written by another man white-washing the minister and the crime he committed by giving him a glowing review (just like Armstrongism).

Links to articles: IFB Preacher Charged With Raping Woman in Texas  and here Spinning Scandals Redux

The Apostle Tells You How You WILL Observe The Sabbath

The Apostle has laid down the law on how you should be observing the Sabbath.  Epescially for you disgruntled COG members who are disturbed by all the constant upheavals in the COG's.  So you have jumped ship from UCG into COGaWA.  You now realize you made a mistake and don't know what to do.  So feeling sorry for yourself you want to sit at home on your sorry little behind and whine.  But have no fear, the Apostle is here and has specific instructions for you!

Apostle Malm's rules and regulations are:

Rule 1: First the Sabbath is a commanded assembly. Lev 23:3  Six days shall work be done: but the seventh day is the sabbath of rest, an holy convocation; ye shall do no work therein: it is the sabbath of the LORD in all your dwellings.

 Rule 2: This does NOT mean assembling with just anyone!  We are to assemble with like minded persons in a godly manner.

 To assemble with heathen is not a HOLY convocation;

(i.e. you are not to assemble with anyone outside the COG.  Even then they must be strong, firmly rooted believers in HWA's teachings.)

Rule 3:  To be HOLY any convocation must be in their name [by their authority or command] and it must be God centered; Christ centered; and centered on the Father.

(i.e.  Since they do not know Jesus and ignore what he taught they do not know the Father.)

Rule 4: Assembling with those who will not obey the Father and will not accept his instruction and correction through his spirit ARE NOT SONS OF THE FATHER!  They are NOT brothers of those who do love the Father enough to obey him and accept his instruction.
Each brother is to assemble with Christ and the Father.  That IS the PRIORITY; the FOCUS!

(i.e.  Armstrongism always has to label people as 'others'.  It needs a bogeyman to blame and to make themselves feel more special and set apart)

Rule 5:We must assemble with those who we have proved to ourselves are of the same mind and have the same spirit of God.

Who did Adam and Eve assemble with?  Who did Enoch assemble with?  What corporate church did Noah assemble with?  The key is to stand with the Almighty and NOT with men; then those who do likewise will come together.  After that Satan will sow his tares until they rise to the top and take over any corporation and then those faithful to God will leave to be loyal to him and start anew.  That is the history of the New Covenant assembly of the Called Out!

God  is allowing this for a PURPOSE!  To teach those who would govern with him in the Kingdom: Absolute loyalty to HIM ALONE: No matter what anyone else does!  He does NOT want another rebellion with someone going astray and leading others; he want us all to be totally loyal to HIM, so that if by chance anyone does go astray: NO ONE WILL FOLLOW THEM ASTRAY!

To teach us this very important lesson he allows this to happen over and over through each new generation!  This is the VITAL lesson of complete loyalty to God above loyalty to anyone or anything else!

(i.e. Apostle Malm is ignorant about the New Covenant.  It cannot be kept by attaching  any of the 613 laws of the Hebrews)

The Apostle is setting his acolytes up for the formation of his new splinter cult starting sometime around the Feast this year:

BE SURE
I have repeatedly said that people should stay where they are until the fruits of what is going on mature.  Recently I stepped back from that as some fruits are now coming clear and I realize that this is very much a matter of personal understanding and decision.
Let me say this.  At this time the fruits have not yet reached their full maturity.  Things that are obvious to some may be obscure to others.  This is a transitional situation.  I expect that in the near future  [within a year and most likely around or soon after the fall Feast]  much will work out.  At that time the faithful will come out of these various groups and come together into a new, much more godly association.

The End is Here!  God is sifting the COG to weed out the rebellious heinous sinners from it's midst.  Only the true followers of the Apostle will understand.  It's time to scare the sheeple once again!

Brethren, God is sifting his people and the “Hour of  Trial” is at the door for Laodicea and the whole world.
PREPARE YOURSELVES!   ARM YOURSELVES WITH THE SWORD OF TRUTH!   FORTIFY YOURSELVES IN OUR HIGH TOWER OF STRENGTH!
Use the Sabbath and all the other time available to fight the good fight against the evils that are already evident; and to prepare for what lies ahead!