People change as well the information, stories,
understandings, so called facts, ideas and truths we all were given from others
in our youth.
Every wedding I ever performed, whether I thought
the couple had much of a chance or not, was an exercise in forcing them to
promise they would never change in their views towards life or each other, and
then I failed to inform them everything all around them, from this moment
on will start to change . The reason I didn't tell them that was that I
did not understand that myself at the time. You know, "Jesus Christ, the
same yesterday, today and tomorrow," along with the church and it's story kind
of thing.
Ministry is a somewhat unique calling. From
experience, the membership totally expects the minister to never change and
always tell the same old old story they all think they love so well. They
all too often expect him/her to be and do everything they have no personal
intention of ever being or doing as well. I know churches from both
sides of the altar so to speak and people are just plain people. In fact,
one lesson from all this myself is that people change very little in life no
matter what the story.
The world of theology is huge. Most in ministry
attend the school of their
denominational choice and, of course, get the spin on the Bible and the "truth" plainly visible to them in their perspectives. Others outside that experience are less than true. In most fundamentalist schools it truly becomes a case of "we are right and you are of your father the Devil." Most liberal seminaries are called liberal because they actually study the bigger picture of theology and admit to it's messy nature.
denominational choice and, of course, get the spin on the Bible and the "truth" plainly visible to them in their perspectives. Others outside that experience are less than true. In most fundamentalist schools it truly becomes a case of "we are right and you are of your father the Devil." Most liberal seminaries are called liberal because they actually study the bigger picture of theology and admit to it's messy nature.
But life unfolds. None of us get the truth of
anything from birth into it. It truly is "the glory of a king to search
out a matter." The problem is that as a man or women given to teaching
theological truth as they understand it also accumulates more and more
knowledge, experience, disasters, pain and life realities along the way. Most of
life unfolding will eventually challenge anyone's beliefs so dearly gotten in
their youth.
One reads more and listens to more and eventually comes to hold different conclusions about those once cherished beliefs. Remember, beliefs are not truth. There truly are mere beliefs.
One reads more and listens to more and eventually comes to hold different conclusions about those once cherished beliefs. Remember, beliefs are not truth. There truly are mere beliefs.
And so along with members of churches, ministers
realize they need to move on and perhaps either regret the choice in the first
place, or at least realize they can't teach what they no longer believe and need
out.
Let me be blunt. On this site and with the
experience most here have had, the reactions to or the advice given to such men
and women in this life situation are usually along the lines
of:
"The bastards should quit now and stop stealing their paychecks"
"The liars deserve what they get.""The moment you stop believing, you should move out of your house, stop eating the food "they" provide for you by giving you a paycheck, tell your family they can go swim for it and get your job at Walmart you son of a bitch."
I can't help you if that's the best you can come
up with in your mind on how a man or woman who probably made a lot of personal
sacrifices and has a story on how they came to ministry themselves, should
handle this dilemma in their maturing lives. However, I do expect these
kinds of comments and will attribute them to painbodies trying to get even
:) I know many CURRENT COG minister and member types who struggle with
this dilemma and stay. I know many COG members who "keep the Feast," by
going to nice places each Fall but never to any services. Yet they painly
tell their friends and bosses, "I have to keep the
Feast."
For decades, ministers have told me, "You are
ahead of your time and you say what I only think!" I can't help that
but do know the conflict of it all. I imagine most critical thinking
Christians of all denominations understand this concept.
The Clergy project, sponsored by the Freedom From
Religion is an organization that helps clergy, most highly educated at the best
schools and not booklet educated Apostles, Watchers and Witnesses, is the work
of Dan Barker, former Evangelical Pastor and Author of Losing Faith in
Faith. Most of these pastors could tie the average person
up in knots of the history of the Bible and the contradictory messages it
contains. The Clergy Project is a compassionate and balanced way for
men and women of former faith to move on with as little collateral damage as
possible. Many times the damage is unavoidable and the lives of mates,
children and extended are forever changed as well.
I serve in the capacity of "one who knows'' to
this project and find it all very familiar with only the names and organizations
changing.
Life is a journey and the Clergy Project is a way
station along the way for men and women of former faith who finally had to face
the facts and stop not seeing what they do see. It's a painful journey and
like a church member who can just not choose to show up the next week while
their lives keep in full step, liberating sometime after the "No one told me
this when I was in Seminary" hits the fan.
The Clergy project is a very compassionate,
balanced and extremely helpful endeavor and I honor them in this. I am pleased
to be a small part of it. I wish I had had something like this in my own
transitions instead of just getting thrown under the bus by my own studies and
denomination and left in the gutter with, "just call the business office and
they can help you with your questions about severance," or as the head of the
WCG "Reconciliation Dept" said, "We wish you the best of luck and will
pray for you." Or did they say "be warmed and be
filled," I forget...
The Clergy Project is a confidential online community for active and
former clergy who do not hold the supernatural beliefs of their
religious traditions. The Clergy Project launched on March 21st, 2011.
Currently, the community's nearly 100 members use it to network and
discuss what it's like being an unbelieving leader in a religious
community. The Clergy Project’s goal is to support members as they move
beyond faith. Members freely discuss issues related to their transition
from believer to unbeliever including:
- Wrestling with intellectual, ethical, philosophical and theological issues
- Coping with cognitive dissonance
- Addressing feelings of being stuck and fearing the future
- Looking for new careers
- Telling their families
- Sharing useful resources
- Living as a nonbeliever with religious spouses and family
- Using humor to soften the pain
- Finding a way out of the ministry
- Adjusting to life after the ministry
“We know there must be thousands of clergy out there who have secretly abandoned their faith but have nowhere to turn,” says Dan Barker, a former evangelical preacher who “lost faith in faith” after 19 years of preaching the gospel. “Now they do have a place to meet, a true sanctuary, a congregation of those of us who have replaced faith and dogma with reason and human well-being.”
