In the course of this blog's existence, I have been sharply critical of the leadership and theology of the Armstrong Churches of God. Now, I still believe that all of those criticism were valid and deserved. Nevertheless, in the discussions that have been generated here and on other blogs in which I have participated, the question of my own culpability in my entrapment in this cult has arisen a number of times.
First, I want to say that I embrace that as a valid question, and one that a person of real integrity is bound to consider and to offer some response. Having accepted the question, I want to acknowledge immediately that I do accept a large share of the responsibility for my involvement in Armstrongism. If that surprises any of my fellow survivors, it might warrant a little introspection on your own part!
The PLAIN TRUTH is that I was intellectually lazy and did NOT do my due diligence! In short, taking a so-called college level Bible Correspondence Course, reading the Bible and a bundle of booklets and articles on various doctrinal issues did NOT constitute a comprehensive, objective, or critical review of the information available to me. I allowed someone to feed me a pre-packaged, highly subjective interpretation of the Bible. Looking back, it is clear that I accepted the inferior research of others simply because it sounded superficially plausible in explaining a very complicated reality. In other words, while I was definitely interested and looking for answers, I was not willing to do the deep dive necessary to arrive at an informed conclusion.
Sure, it is easier for folks now than it was back in the day. We didn't have the internet at our fingertips, and it is a tremendous resource in the right hands for ferreting out truth. Even so, I cannot escape that realization in the back of my mind that tells me I should have known better. I also have to admit to myself that it did feel good to think that I was privy to inside information that wasn't available to everyone. The allure of being in on the big secret exerted a powerful influence on my ego/vanity!
Over time, I also allowed those master manipulators to place me in a mental straitjacket. I stopped thinking for myself. I stopped asking questions, researching, and seeking answers to the big questions. I allowed myself to be convinced that such curiosity would lead me to the Dark Side of the Force - that I would make myself vulnerable to losing the "truth" and salvation which I thought that I had found! Looking back, it is clear that I also ignored a great deal of evidence over the years which contradicted the interpretations that I had accepted so enthusiastically!
Yes, there were plenty of occasions for me to reject Armstrongism over the years, but I continued to dismiss or ignore the warning signs that things were amiss. I knew that racism was wrong, and I majored in the history of the United States and Britain in college. The evidence was right in front of me that Anglo-Israelism was completely absurd - that what I had already learned had completely and thoroughly discredited the heresy. Looking back now, I have to say that my excuses for taking as long as I did to emerge from the delusion of Armstrongism look pretty weak and pathetic in hindsight!
The point of this post? NEVER allow yourself to be satisfied. Continue to look, explore, question, research, and learn. Also, listen to your own conscience and invite the Holy Spirit to help you in your search for answers and understanding. Do NOT go and dig in the earth and bury the "treasure" which you believe has been entrusted to you. Jesus Christ, your Savior and mine, made it very clear that he expected his disciples to increase/multiply what he had entrusted to them!
Miller Jones/Lonnie C Hendrix