Friday, June 1, 2012

Apostle Malm Baptizing Tour

The apostle has announced that a baptizing tour is underway and that if any of you heretics need to get baptized to let him know. So if you live in the Southeastern US you are in luck!

ANNOUNCEMENTS:   A baptising tour is being organized for the South East United States; anyone in that area who desires to be baptised should contact me for further information at 

For Apostle James "I am not starting a church" Malm to be doing this indicates he has more up his sleeve.  Soon we will see an organized church somewhere and then a Feast site.  Can you imagine what a miserable site he would have!


Anonymous said...

Oh GOD! I don't think I could have handled a Malm church or feast site. It would be like a warzone. Everyone would be walking on eggshells, afraid to be caught in the crossfire of one person's interpretational infraction and the next person's unpardonable pet peeve, all while walking across Malm's minefield. Sounds miserable.

On the bright side, playing ball with the apostle would probably mean one strike and you're out, because mercy and forgiveness just encourage a lack of zeal. See ya, suckers!

Anonymous said...

oh for Pete sake, why does he have to be in my part of the country? I'll have to drop him a note and see if I can get on his wash list.


Douglas Becker said...

Hope no one drowns.

Anonymous said...

So, who exactly is going to be doing this traveling and baptizing? Malm? Isn't he sick, blind, and broke? Or has he begun ordaining his own ministers on the downlow?

Anonymous said...

"Malm? Isn't he sick, blind, and broke?"

The appeal to ego of being important and God's servant, along with any funds he may aquire for his expenses being so, can heal the sick, blind and broke. Probably raise the dead too.


Steve said...

Just goes to show that ANYONE can start a web site, quote parts of the bible and Armstrong, and get a following. What kind of people fall for this crap? Oooops! We did...or in most cases, our parents and grand parents did. Now he's going to play James the Baptist?

Douglas Becker said...

Just goes to show that ANYONE can start a web site, quote parts of the bible and Armstrong, and get a following

I did.

Except I never got a following, not that I was looking for one.

I suppose that starting a website, quoting the bible and Herbert Armstrong to prove Armstrongists wrong just doesn't have the same appeal....

Byker Bob said...

Do these people still teach that anyone who has enough Negro genetics to effect their physical features will be "sent back to Africa" at the beginning of the Millennium? Just wondering.


DennisCDiehl said...

BB...I had my saliva tested by the National Geographic Genome folk and they took my DNA back 100,000 years to East Africa.

Do I have to leave. It's still in my spit!