Sunday, February 16, 2014

The Offical Church of God Bobble-Head






Bob Thiel has his latest "sermon" out whining about Mardi Gras and Carnaval, two events that the majority of the United States and the rest of the world don't worry too much about.  Only Armstrongism, Fred Phelps and a few crazy evangelical groups seem to get into a tizzy about these two events.

Bob starts out immediately with his jerky body motions.  With his black shirt, black necktie, black sweater, black jacket and black chair he ends up looking like a bobble-head bouncing around. Learn some fashion techniques if you are going to present yourself as God's greatest gift to the Mayan's and the Church of God.


20 comments:

DennisCDiehl said...

Bob looks dressed as an undertaker

Anonymous said...

So lacking in confidence.

He actually has followers ??

Byker Bob said...

Know what's really funny? Considering the magnitude of Thiel's visibility, and the extent of his influence, this is almost like a group of us getting together to discuss someone's bad speech at Sunday Night Spokesmans' Club.

There is no way that such a deficient speaker could build any type of following. You wouldn't even want someone like this to ask the opening prayer! This has got to be a painful hobby for Bob.

BB

Anonymous said...

Yes, but it's fun for everyone else in a Mystery Science Theater 3000 sort of way.

Byker Bob said...

Ya know, I was going to let this go, but it really bothers me! This being February, Thiel and all of the other ACOG pretenders with a voice should be joining in and celebrating the contributions of African Americans to our great nation. But, they won't. Instead, they always seem to focus in on items and practices HWA blamed on Nimrod, and we all know what not so subtle innuendos and racist overtones go along with that!

BB

Head Usher said...

Nobody who isn't fully indoctrinated into the COGy belief system isn't going to have a clue what Bob is talking about. Once again, Bob, in his own quirky and completely inimitable style has managed to get away without making his point: explaining to us why Mardi Gras is wrong.

Here is Bob in a nutshell. He quotes a source, which he attributed to The American Catholic, "Like many Catholic holidays and seasonal celebrations, it likely has its roots in pre-xian traditions based on the seasons." Bob goes on to comment, "So basically, The American Catholic admits that this probably came from pre-xian things. And it certainly did." This is classic apologetics. He takes a single source that says that something he likes is a possibility and without missing a beat, he transforms it into a certainty. This is exactly the type of mickeymouse "scholarship" that makes Bob, ever the imprecise thinker, the a third-rate author of tabloid-esqe books that seek to capitalize on sensentionalizing rather than doing the hard word of familiarizing himself with all the known evidence and then concluding with an informed opinon.

He then reads from Irenaeus a quote in which he imagines that meats, having been offered to some imaginary pagan deity, have been infected with some sort of spiritual contagion (contradicting 1 Corinthians 8:4-8, 10:25-31). As Bob continues reading, Irenaeus then goes on to rail against the bloody spectacle of American football (the gladiator games). True-blue Catholic that Bob has always been, he claims to put the bible first, but actually prefers the non-canonical opinions of Catholic writers, even quoting 1 Corinthians 10:19-21 out of context so that it sounds like "Paul" agrees with Irenaeus.

Being the good Catholic that he is, he then reads from Arnobius who says it's wrong to have a banquet followed by a fast in honor of Jupiter. He then asserts a connection to Carnival by waving his hands and saying, "Sounds a lot like Mardi Gras!" Well, there are a lot of things that "sound like" Mardi Gras, Bob. Like, how about if you reverse the order, so that it's a fast followed by a banquet? Now that you mention it Bob, the COG way of celebrating the also admittedly pre-xian holiday (with equally "likely" connections to Canaanitic paganism) of Yom Kippur or "Day of Atonement" also "sounds a lot like Mardi Gras."

That brings me to a question. What makes the Abrahamic religions not "pagan" religions also? Are religions that accept many gods inherently "evil" while monotheistic ones are inherently "good"? Why should anyone suspect that to be the case? Why aren't today's mainline Judaism and xianity with their ancient supersitions just as "pagan" as the once mainline Roman religions with their ancient superstitions? Aren't they just two different ways of saying the same thing: IF you live a virtuous life, THEN you need not fear death?

So, simply saying that Mardi Gras is "wrong" because it has "pagan roots" still doesn't answer the question of what's so bad about Mardi Gras. Everything has "pagan roots" Bob, even your brand of ancient superstition, but you don't see anything wrong with that. Tell us what the actual negative consequences of celebrating Mardi Gras are, because your "hand-waving" doesn't cut the mustard. Is it hell fire and brimstone? Is that it? If so, you really should scrap this video and make a 2-minute video in which you say that instead of 16 minutes of vacuous nothingness. At least those without a COG background would know what you were trying to say, and you'd save the rest of your audience 14 minutes each.

Anonymous said...

This guy is dressed like a Satanist. Everything is black. The image and vibe is not good. Couldn't care to listen what he has to say.

Joe Moeller said...

All other comments aside, Mardi Gras has devolved into an absolutely disgusting orgy, and by any standards is a national disgrace.

Joe Moeller
Cody, WY

DennisCDiehl said...

Robert, God love him...seems a theologian in the same way Homer Simpson is a nuclear station operator

Anonymous said...

Is this blog obsessed with Bob Theil? Why not pick on someone else for a while, like COGiW maybe?

Anonymous said...

What's with all the black? Is Bob channeling his inner Johnny Cash? You need a guitar, dude.

Or is he going for the Goth look? Get some chains, black eyeliner and a few piercings, Bob. You'll totally rock the look!

Anonymous said...


Herbert W. Armstrong always wore white shirts, and once even got loud about how you don't see him wearing a dark blue shirt. Imagine what HWA would say about Bob Thiel and his all-black Laodicean style.

If Bob Thiel does not get some better fashion sense, he could fit right in with the Mardi Gras people and their strange styles. He can see that there is something wrong with them, but he cannot see that there is something wrong with himself too.

This reminds me of the black shirt worn by one bad character who constantly badgered one of the Laodicean groups heading back into the world--known as the United Church of Godlessness--into credentialing him as a "minister" so he could bring other evil and malicious people into the UCG.





June said...

Why do grown men today all sound like teenagers of 15? Don't voices change anymore?
Is his testosterone level so low?
Really, anyone have an explanation for the childish voice?

Anonymous said...

One word for Bob: CABOKI hair filler.
It really does work Bob.

Anonymous said...


"Mardi Gras & Carnaval: Are they for Christians?"


No.

But then, neither are self-appointed false prophets in silly black outfits.

Also, neither are all the false prophecies of all the false pagan religions in the world, with which self-appointed false prophets in silly black outfits try to waste everyone's time.

None of the above are for Christians.

Anonymous said...

A commenter claims that "Mardi Gras has devolved into an absolutely disgusting orgy", yet I've seen no evidence of Mardi Gras having large portraits of Herbert W. Armstrong that people worship as members do at the absolutely disgusting Armstrongist orgy known as the United Church of God.
Heck, he might as well tell people the UCG is an absolutely disgusting church just because the UCG's patriarch HWA repeatedly raped his daughter.

I know families who have had wonderful and wholesome times recently at Mardi Gras.
Of course they avoided the French Quarter(where no parades occur, anyway!)

Among many other things, they especially enjoyed the St. Charles Ave parade, the family area in the Garden District, and Metairie's Caesar parade(which Disney Land has copied for it's theme park).

One family told me about the big New Orleans muffuletta sandwich they bought which was big enough to split up for the whole family- and very delicious, too!

Sharon said...

Well Anon @ 7:29

If you know stuff about COGWA then send it to the blog owner or Dennis and I am sure they will post it.

I am glad they continue to point out the absurdities of Bob Thiel here. There is nothing Christian about the guy and the garbage that he teaches.

Byker Bob said...

Even back in the 1960s, New Years Eve on the streets of Pasadena was an orgy. Your opinion as to what happened that night was more or less a function of who you went there with, and what form of transportation you used. If you cruised the parade route in a car with friends, you'd see the crowd, but not a lot that was going on in the crowd. If you wanted to have some fun from the car, maybe there would be a little mooning, or some fake vomiting. On foot, and walking through the crowd you'd get more of a feel for the sex, drugs, and alcohol which were in evidence everywhere. The people I travelled with always had a good time, with the worst things being the car overheating, or needing to find a bathroom in a hurry to get rid of the beer or wine one happened to be renting for the evening. Or, red eye from riding motorcycles along the smoggy parade route. Is Mardi Gras much different from that?

BB

Anonymous said...

Thiel is playing the part of the "little black man in Rome" from a Catholic prophecy. According to his interpretations, the other witness comes from Israeli descent. However, as the story usually goes, there's not a second witness available to play his part.

Anonymous said...

Does his baron-beast bro favor dark clothing? Thiel needs to consult with George Zimmer!