Sunday, September 5, 2021

The Math is Incorrect: Prophet Bobalonia Pronounces Bullshitta on Shemitahs!

 There's been a lot of talk about Shemitahs lately...evidently. 


 

"Modern Jews claim that the period of time from sunset September 6, 2021 through sunset September 25, 2022 is a 'Shemitah year.' Some claim that this and the year that begins when this one ends (the claimed 'jubilee' is being called a 'super shemitah") and runs through 2023 may cause destruction or the Great Reset. Is this possible? Is Messianic Jew, Jonathan Cahn (of the Harbinger fame) a prophet of God as Pat Robertson has said or a false prophet? Was he right about the financial collapse of the USA in 2015? Are the Jews right about their Shemitah year being year 5982, or is 5991 closer? What about the beginning of sorrows? Dr. Thiel addresses these issues and more."

BibleNewsProphecy: 2022-2023 Shemitahs: Destruction/Reset?

Spoiler Alert
For entertainment purposes only

The Great Prophet "clearly" shows how the Great Shemitahs Destruction Reset is nothing to worry about.  They do not fit his calculations so if you were concerned about them beginning this month on the 6th, you can relax.  

And too...Someone, please send Prophet Bobalonia a New Testament for Christ's sake...and his own!



23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Based on Caleb getting land in 1448 BC then FOT 2021 to FOT 2022 is a 5th year of a 7 year cycle and the next jubilee is 2052-2053 but don't ask me to prove it.

Anonymous said...

Is Jonathan Cahn a Prophet of God as Pat Robinson said or a false prophet?
Not if Bob Thiel has his say.
But is Bob Thiel a Prophet of God?
That is the question.

Tonto said...

Thank you Bob for clearing this up for me. All this time, I thought this stuff was the name for a Las Vegas casino
show called...

See My Tah Tahs!

Hoss said...

Bob appears to be the anti-prophet: not only does he warn us about why things happened after they happen, he warns us about when things won't happen!
He would be a good addition to Superman's Bizarro World!

Anonymous said...

Astronomy does not co-operate with the so-called 19 year time cycles, which is why adjustments need to be made. All such things are of flawed human origin. They are not divine.

Anonymous said...

I seriously doubt Bob or Dennis knows much about math or calendars. The church leaders or ministers are all in way over their head. So are the Jewish rabbis. Go talk to an astronomer.

Ronco said...

Oh, those dreadful curtains... and what's the deal with Bob's left eye?
I hope it wasn't a football injury or something.

Anonymous said...

How can I watch a video with a backdrop of vomited-out flowers? Does Bob have no pride and dignity anymore? Does his wife have no decorating taste to where she can tell her prophet that his set looks like shit?

Anonymous said...

The only people I have seen talking about Shemitah are the nutjobs at NewsMax and other ultra-right-wing sites. None of the Jewish synagogues around here are discussing it. Bobalonia loves creating drama over nothing, much like his entire ministry!

Anonymous said...

No one knows the future. Don't get sucked into following men who don't have any more of a clue as to what will happen in the future as any other person on Earth.

RSK said...

Apparently not. He cant even set his camera properly.

Sweetblood777 said...

No where in the entire Bible is 19 year cycles mentioned. The only reasonable answer is that this must have developed during the Babylonian captivity. (IMHO).

DennisCDiehl said...

Anonymous said...
I seriously doubt Bob or Dennis knows much about math or calendars
===========================

My "The Math is incorrect" was not about me making my own calculations. It was a bit of cheek and play off of Dave Pack's "the math is correct" he uses every week to reassure the faithful all his miscalculations of the past year of Jesus returning on Thursday for sure are still correct.

Anonymous said...

It is the case that "calculations" have been a theme running through apocalyptic Millerism from the beginning. William Miller had calculations that led him to believe that he knew when Christ would return leading to the regrettable Great Disappointment. Other Millerite number crunchers succeeded him.

The idea that the timing of the Parousia could be calculated is far-fetched. But it is more than just silly. It is a form of quantitative Gnosticism - the idea that someone has discovered some hidden bit of knowledge that is critical to well-being and salvation. HWA adopted that shtick by billing the Bible as an encoded book that only he could understand. So after 18 and a half centuries he discovered that The Circumcison Party that opposed Paul was actually right - not about circumcison but about other select passages from the OT litigation.

Gnosticism with a quantitive twist is particularly effective among people who experience math insecurity. They just are not going to challenge the calendrical calculations. And it is particularly valuable to apocalyptic Millerite leaders because they can adopt an air of authority based on something that is solemn nonsense but that nobody is going to really look into. After the predicted events do not happen, the math is just going to come out in a new rendition anyway.

But you don't have to take a deep dive into astronomy, Jewish legal teaching and calender study to cut to the chase on this issue. Jesus said that nobody would know the time of his return. That's in the Bible and the dubious use of chronology is not. Jesus wanted you to think about other things.

I feel sorry for people who are taken in by this over-worked Millerite strategy. I used to be a prophecy weenie myself when I was in my early twenties. Science fiction was also my literary genre of choice. My salad days. In the last analysis, pre-occupation with the predictive elements in Bible prophecy is self-centered. It is not about God or other people. It's about feeling personally overwhelmed. It's about bobbing around helplessly on an turbulent and menacing ocean of world events. It's about "What is going to happen to me?" I can appreciate the existential apprehension in this question but rest assured, the Gnostics to the contrary, we'll all find out.

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Anonymous said...

Haha Dennis. I was going to say that Bob should study math under Dave...

Michael said...

Dennis wrote:
"...reassure the faithful all his miscalculations of the past year of Jesus returning"

Come, come now! As Dave has made very clear to us all, they are not "miscalculations" but rather new understandings, each time providing him with astounding new insights of how the JC return date is just one more Holy Day Unit into the future...

Anonymous said...

WIth that corny backdrop I would have thought Bob would have appeared shirtless, with head, face and body covered in soap! When did his shower become his new television studio?

Also, "Dr." Bob really needs to do his audience a favor and brush up on some Spokesman Club basics, as those bizarre hand gestures are about as phony and inconsistent with the points he's trying to make as a Jen Psaki press conference!

Seriously, do his followers actually believe this guy is some kind of prophet of God?

Anonymous said...

Well, at least Stephan Lloyd Gilbreath has a halfway decent presentation voice - even if his electronic backdrops are a bit…cluttered, and equally as unsuitable.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gG9VSP7AwoI

I can just envision that if HWA could see the kinds of people "following in his footsteps" doing "the Work" these days - he'd probably put his hand to forehead, with face downward, slowly shaking his head from side to side, thinking "Where did I go wrong?"

Anonymous said...

I wonder what my cousin, Shemitah Jo Bodine thinks about all of this???

Anonymous said...

Is Bobalonia fliming these pathetic videos in a cat house? Those curtains look like something in a cheap cat house! Garner Ted would probably approve though. He spent a lot of time in them.

Phinnpoy said...

Newsmax doesn't carry articles about the Shemitah. It's World Net Daily that carries the silly Judaizing articles about the Shemitah, and keeping the sabbath and the holy days.

Zippo said...

My "The Math is incorrect" was not about me making my own calculations.

I taught math and I'm not going to look at Bob's or Dave's numbers. I'd expect their math would be as convoluted as computing the odds of getting a Royal Fizzbin.

Zippo said...

When listening to Bob's sermons and other spiels, it's less distracting to just listen and not watch the flailing arms, inappropriate gestures, hand maps of Asia Minor, and grab bag "studio" decorations.
By listening only, you find he's still all over the place and not presenting a polished piece of pronouncements. Then you'll probably go back to the visual entertainment...
But be careful! He's really bad at tooting the shofar!