The next time Passover Dave throws a hissy-fit, just remember that his temper is God ordained. Only the BEST have "strong tempers." So when he is raking you over the coals for not giving as much money as he expects, just be cool, its only his "strong temper."
But here's one, number 92 – and this is fairly easy to understand, an important parallel – with powerful personalities often you have strong tempers. Well that describes Moses and Mr. Armstrong. I just can't relate (ehem), or maybe I can.
Here is what happens when psychopaths have temper tantrums:
This may be hard to hear, but your narcissist is controlling you with a device no more sophisticated than the good old temper tantrum.
Throwing temper tantrums to manipulate your behavior is but an aspect of narcissists doing everything for effect, an aspect of them going through life playing to mirrors so as to get the wanted looks and behaviors in reaction. In other words, remember that this is what he's doing the whole time...
You get the temper tantrum the moment you aren't doing that, the moment you aren't playing along with his game of 'Pretend.' In it he is God. He is the center of your universe as well of his own. You are to be in awe of him, to admire him, to see to it that the King lacks nothing he needs or wants, and to change his diaper regularly.
Since all narcissists do 24/7 is play Pretend, and all they want is for you to play along, they never needed to mature and find other ways to interact with people. So, they just use . . . and use . . . and use . . . and use the temper-tantrum technique. The moment you stray from his script, he raises an obnoxious ruckus.
You know what he wants. If not, keep trying things, like you do with a baby, until you hit on the right thing and the ruckus stops. This is extortion. Give him what he wants, or he won't let you have any peace.
One thing that will push a narcissist's temper-tantrum button for sure is objecting to their abuse. You mustn't do that. You must docilely submit to abuse from God Almighty. In fact, it isn't abuse for God Almighty to treat you like dirt, because that's what you are relative to God Almighty, so quit insulting him by expecting him to treat you as an equal.
By Kathy Krajco
From: Control by Temper Tantrum